Can't Let Go
by MadeleineJade
Summary: Bella ruined her friendship with Edward by confessing her feelings to him which he didn't return. She went back to Arizona for college but returns to Washington after graduation. Can she and Edward be friends again? AH ExB
1. Awkward Reunion

**A/N I don't own the Twilight characters.**

**All human. Bella was best friends with Alice and Edward in high school. She decided to confess her feelings to Edward before end of senior year, but he unfortunately didn't return her feelings. Embarrassed and regretful of a ruined friendship, she moved back to Arizona for college but returned to Washington due to Charlie's illness. Can she and Edward be friends again?**

**And just to let you know, kids, this is in the category of romance and humor. No big drama here, just a feel good, fluffy story so don't come at me later and complain/wonder/wish about/for angst and obstacles. Not everything has to be all dramatic, and I'm telling you now not to expect it. BUT if you want to smile and laugh, well, you've come to the right place. Are we on the same page? Great. Now, REAR: read, enjoy, and review. :D**

Chp 1-BPoV

_I am such an ass!_ I'd pretty much said this to myself everyday for the past four years since high school. Actually, it varied. Sometimes I'd say _I'm such a jackass _or _What the hell was I thinking _or _What the hell is wrong with me_? But mostly _I am such an ass_ covered it.

Why was I such an ass? Easy. I ruined a great friendship by opening my big mouth. I didn't even know why I did it. Where did that surge of empowerment even come from? I was not usually so bold as to confess my true feelings to someone without knowing how they felt about me first. But that's exactly what I did. _Ugh! What the hell was I thinking?_ See, there I'd go again. It'd been over four years and I couldn't let it go. Why couldn't I forgive myself and move on? Edward had. I thought.

I knew what came over me. My best friend Alice, Edward's sister, told me I should do it. And my best friend Coley, from Phoenix told me to do it too. They knew I was in love with Edward. Hopelessly, utterly, stupidly in love. And he only saw me as a friend. How did I misread the cues so badly? Alice misread them too, and she was hardly ever wrong. But Coley misread them too, though to be fair she only had what I told her to go on since she was in Scottsdale, Arizona and I was in Forks, Washington.

I moved to Forks my sophomore year in high school. My mom, Renee and I were living in Phoenix but then she got remarried. Phil, my step-dad, played minor league baseball and traveled a lot. I knew she really wanted to be with him though she never would have admitted it to me. She actually felt an obligation to stay with me while Phil traveled. Imagine that, my flighty mom feeling a sense of parental responsibility. I didn't want her to be unhappy so I sucked it up and moved to Forks to live with my dad, Charlie Swan, chief of police. I had visited him during the summers for maybe a few weeks at a time until I was twelve, but I really hadn't lived there since I was a baby. My parents spilt when I was under a year old, and I'd been living with my mom since.

But upon moving to Forks I actually really liked it. The weather was nowhere as nice as Phoenix, but the friends I made there made up for it. I missed Coley terribly, but we still kept in touch via email and texting, and I'd see her over the summer and Christmas breaks when I went back to visit Renee and Phil. But mostly I spent my free time with Alice and then Edward Cullen.

Alice and I became fast friends though I didn't really know how. We were so different. Actually, she was a lot like Coley. Maybe that's why I gravitated to her or she to me. Anyway, we were inseparable in high school. I was over at her house so much the Cullens pretty much adopted me. That's how I became so close to Edward too. Well, I got close to Edward as well as and Emmett, their big brother and his girlfriend Rosalie and her twin brother Jasper who Alice started dating our senior year.

_Ugh! Senior year!_ I cringed whenever I thought about it. Things were going so great. I had been accepted to Arizona State University as well as University of Washington in Seattle. I would have gone to the latter had things turned out a little differently. The day I confessed my feelings to Edward, a month before graduation from high school, I still hadn't decided where to go to college. Well, his reaction to my idiocy pretty much pushed me back to Arizona.

We had been spending a lot of time together. Well, when he wasn't dating random girls at school that is. He never did much besides making out with them and…I didn't really want to think about what Edward did with those chicks. The point was this, we had been spending a lot of time together, as friends of course, but I wanted more. Of course I wanted more. Edward was so great. He was handsome and sweet and athletic and smart. The problem was I wasn't the only female to take notice. _Every_ female took notice. He had girls throwing themselves at him. And he'd catch them. He'd tell me later how shallow they were or boring or whatever. They didn't hold his interest, which was why he dated so many of them. I didn't think he used them or anything. He was not like that. He was just playing the field I supposed.

Edward always asked me if anyone caught my eye, and I'd lie and say no when in fact he caught my eye and every other part of me. But, alas, we were only friends. Alice and Coley both thought he liked me back what with all the time we spent together especially after Alice and Jasper started dating. We'd hang out and watch movies at his house or mine. We'd talk about school. He was going to go to UW-Seattle, which was why I was considering it too.

One Saturday night we were watching some random movie and that's when I had somehow worked up the courage to tell him how I felt. I had these fantasies about him returning my feelings and how we'd be together in college and what not. That's all they were: fantasies. Prom was coming up. I was going to ask him to it, as more than just friends. We had gone to junior prom together the year before as friends, of course. No, I wanted more. I felt more. I thought he felt it too. So I took a deep breath to summon up the guts to say, "Hey, Edward, you know how you always ask me if anyone's caught my eye?" I bit my lip. We had been over at his house. His parents Carlisle and Esme were out, as were Alice and Emmett.

"Yeah?" he acknowledged.

"Well, someone has."

"_Really?_" he smiled teasingly. His curiosity was piqued. "Who?"

I answered his question with a question of my own. "Um, do you want to go the prom with me?" I looked at him expectantly.

I watched his face as he put two and two together. There was a look of shock that flashed in his eyes, and then it turned more regretful. That's when I realized I shouldn't have said anything at all. He didn't even have to answer my question. His expression said it all. I suddenly felt heat flood my face. My head started throbbing, and my chest felt really tight all of a sudden. My stomach was in knots as well.

"Oh," was all he said at first. That one little syllable shattered my entire world. Somehow I kept myself composed for the rest of it. "The thing is, Bella. I sort of already asked Tanya, 'cause, you know, she and I have kind of been dating. I've just been keeping it quiet…and…I thought we were just friends. I mean, that's probably the way we should stay, right? Sorry."

"Oh," I answered. I immediately looked away. "That's okay. I understand…Um, cool. You'll have lots of fun with Tanya," I nodded.

I silently cursed Tanya. She was a senior as well but went to a different school than us. Edward met her at the mall one day. She worked at one of the anchor stores and she helped him find a present for his mom and blah blah blah. It was a cute story if you weren't in love with Edward. He hadn't said anything about asking her before. He usually told me stuff like that. I didn't have time to ponder it more because I noticed the closing credits of the movie. Awesome. Perfect timing. I had to get out of there. I faked a yawn, even though it was only eight o'clock. Needless to say, I vamoosed first chance I got. I vaguely remember Edward looking sad and asking if I was okay. I lied and said sure, sure. Something I'd picked up from my friend Jacob Black.

I went home and crawled into bed and cried and wrote in my journal. I berated myself for being so stupid and delusional. How could Edward Cullen like me in that way? I was just a brainiac, a nerd. His sister's best friend. I was no Tanya. I was awkward and clumsy. I was nowhere close to being in Edward's league. Why did I let myself believe that I was?

After that whole debacle, I steered clear of Edward for the rest of the school year. I spent my lunch hours in the library. If I saw him in the hallway, I'd duck into the closest restroom or classroom or pretend to be engrossed by some sign or poster on the wall or if all else failed, I'd open whatever book I had in my hand to a random page and act like it was the best book I'd ever read until he passed me by.

Edward had tried to talk to me in the weeks following my confession, but I pretended to be busy. Every afternoon and evening and weekend. The problem was, I didn't get to see Alice much either. I told her I asked him to prom and that it didn't work out. She could tell I was heartbroken and didn't want to talk about it so she let it go. Occasionally, Alice would come over to my house, but I stayed away from the Cullen residence as much as possible. I hung out with my friend Jacob a lot down in La Push, but then he hooked up with Leah and spent most of his time with her. I'd get the occasional text from Alice and Edward asking if I was okay. I always texted back telling them I was really busy, but I was pretty much all alone. I'd even drive to Seattle on the weekends just to get out of Forks so when I said I was busy and out of town it wasn't a lie. I'd go to the library there and hide out. I was pathetic. Just biding time before I could leave Washington and go back to Arizona.

I really dreaded school. I didn't want to see Edward and be reminded of what a jackass I was. I missed him terribly though. Alice too, but I was embarrassed beyond articulation. I skipped all school functions, including prom. I even contemplated not going to the graduation ceremony, but I realized that it wouldn't go unnoticed that the valedictorian wasn't there to give her speech.

Somehow I dragged my ass to graduation and plastered on a happy face. I vaguely remember part of my commencement speech. I looked out into the throngs of classmates, family and friends reciting all the trite things you could hear in any given commencement speech. But at the end of it, I recall catching Edward's eye as he sat there listening intently to my crappy speech and adding, "As commencement implies, this is the beginning of something new for all of us. A new chapter in our lives. I wish nothing but the best for all of my fellow classmates and graduates. No matter what you've done in the past that may be holding you back, let it go because tomorrow is a new day waiting to be conquered. Don't let anything hold you back from what you want in life. The world is yours. Go claim it."

Yeah, that's fine and dandy for everyone else, but I couldn't follow my own advice. I was obsessive compulsive to an extent, I suppose. Playing and replaying the events over and over in my mind.

That was the last time I saw the Cullens in a long time. I stopped by the graduation party that evening at their house but didn't plan on staying long at all. I just wanted to say goodbye. Esme was really sweet, of course. She and Carlisle got me a charm bracelet for a graduation present. It was a delicate white gold chain with a three gemstone charms on it: sapphire, emerald and onyx. They represent the three of us, me, Edward and Alice. We had once been inseparable. I was sure Esme had noticed that I never hung around their house any more. She may have had her suspicions as to the reason, but never brought it up to me. She only noted that she hadn't seen me in a while. I lied and said I had been really busy with the end of the year stuff and getting ready to go to ASU. I hated lying to Esme. She'd always been so great to me, but what was I going to tell her? That I finally wore my feelings on my sleeve, asked her son out and got my heart crushed by him. I didn't think so.

I thanked Esme and Carlisle for everything and hugged both of them. Emmett and Rose and Jasper were easy enough to tell goodbye, though I would miss Emmett. He was always like a protective older brother to me. Alice and Edward were another matter altogether. While the party was raging, Alice and I were in her bedroom. It was a teary goodbye, but she said she understood why I had to leave. She apologized for Edward, which was silly. It wasn't her fault her god of a brother didn't return my feelings. We promised to keep in touch, and we had over the four years of college. Alice was still my best friend.

Edward knocked on Alice's bedroom door and came in as we were crying on each other's shoulders. He came and stood next to me waiting for his turn to say goodbye to me. I hadn't been that close to him since that dreadful evening. He had given up trying to talk to me about it a couple weeks prior, thank goodness. It still didn't make me want to be around him though. When you've had your heart torn out by someone, it was impossible to want to face them ever again. But I sucked it up and told him good luck with college and med school. I didn't say good luck with Tanya though. Pretty much I was saying _have a good life_ without actually saying it. I didn't plan on seeing him again. All Edward could say when he hugged me goodbye was, "I'm sorry."

"No, Edward, _I'm_ sorry," I responded, and that was it. I left for Arizona a couple hours later. Like I said, I couldn't get out of Forks fast enough.

The past four years, I had been in Tempe going to ASU. I roomed with Coley, who was great. She was very sympathetic about the Edward situation. She even felt bad for pushing me to confess to him in the first place. That was silly. I was a grown woman. I made the decision to do it. Now I had to live with the repercussions.

So I graduated from ASU with a degree in English and Journalism. I loved Arizona. It was everything Washington wasn't. But part of me missed Forks. I did go back for Christmas and a week in the summer, but mostly I stayed in Tempe.

Now, I found myself back in Washington. I had to come back. Charlie had cancer and needed me close by. He had no other family otherwise. I accepted a job in Seattle as a columnist in the local newspaper. I could do that and continue my freelance work, which afforded me the flexibility to go back to Forks once or twice a week to check on Charlie and go with him to get his radiation treatments.

The column I was writing was such a farce. It was the only thing available so I took it. I went by the penname Lana Love (which personally sounded like a porn star name) and I was writing love advice. I know! I was the last person to be giving advice on romance and relationships. Hell, I should have had a personal column of advice written and dedicated to me alone really. But the editors assured me that it was mostly just for entertainment purposes and no one really took the advice seriously so I could pretty much say whatever. Yeah, we'd see about that.

So I was at the hospital in Forks with Charlie when I ran into him. Edward, who was visiting Carlisle, happened to be on the oncology floor as Charlie and I were leaving his radiation therapy. I had gone back into the therapy room because Charlie forgot his jacket. When I came out, Edward was there talking to Charlie. I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw him. Edward looked up in surprise when he noticed me.

"Bella! Hello. Long time no see!" He smiled his infamous crooked smile. His copper hair was in disarray. He looked glorious. I was suddenly dazzled again. My god, the effect he still had on me. What was going on? I wasn't eighteen anymore. I was a twenty-two year old college graduate and working professional. I shouldn't be reduced to speechlessness just because Edward Freakin' Cullen was in front of me looking all sexy and handsome and irritating. I didn't want to feel anything for him. But old memories and feelings came flooding back. The hurt and embarrassment and humiliation were fresh. I was suddenly a teenager again. And the memory of rejection was sharp and acute, jolting me back to my senses.

I swallowed hard (I hoped he didn't notice that) and smiled, "Hi, Edward. It's been a while hasn't it?"

**All right, review and let me know how you like it so far. Thanks for reading!**


	2. Hal and My New Neighbor

**A/N I am borrowing characters from Twilight**

**Thanks for all the reviews. So, as you can see, I will continue with this little story. I am working on the fifth installment of the Saving Me Sequel One Shots so fear not. I have not abandoned that work—I'm too amused by the Smurfin' characters not to continue. I just needed to smurf this out of my brain for just a little while. For those of you who don't get the **_**Smurfin'**_** usage, read the book, or in this case my story Saving Me. It may just become part of your lexicon as well.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 2 BPoV**

Damn! I knew I'd possibly run into Edward sometime, but I wasn't expecting it to be this soon. I just got to Forks yesterday. I hadn't even gotten settled in yet. He wasn't even supposed to be in Forks right now. Weren't med students supposed to be really busy? Why would he be in Forks and not in Seattle on a Thursday? And damn it, why did he have to look so good? _Get it together, Bella. Come on!_

"Bella?" Charlie was talking to me. Shoot, how long had I been engaging in an internal dialogue? "Are you going over to the Cullens' tonight for dinner?" Charlie and Edward were both looking at me awaiting my response.

"Dinner?"

"Yeah, I just said Esme would really like to have you two over. Charlie wants to take it easy tonight, but you're still invited, Bella." Edward was giving me a strange look as he was getting me up to speed.

"Well, I should probably stay with Charlie tonight. I mean he just had radiation…"

"Nonsense, Bells. Go see your friends. It's been such a long time. I'll be okay. Billy Black is coming over to watch the game tonight anyway. He can keep me company. Stop worrying about me. You need to get out more."

My jaw dropped infinitesimally and my eyes widened in surprise. Unbelievable! The man who avoided social situations like the plague was telling _me_ I needed to go out more. "What? Mr. Leave Me Alone and let me fish is telling _me_ that I have to get out more," I smirked at my dad. Edward seemed amused as well. "What do you know about it anyway?" I narrowed my eyes at my father.

"Well Coley says you don't get out much, and Renee mentioned that too. In fact…" Charlie was going to continue but I interrupted.

"Wow, I didn't know my social life, or lack thereof, was such a hot topic of discussion…" I was going to kill Coley! "But, if you've already got plans with Billy then please don't let me interfere," I said sarcastically. "I haven't seen you in forever, but that's okay." I looked at Edward. He was indeed smiling throughout Charlie's and my exchange. "Tell Esme that I will be over for dinner. What time?"

He chuckled. "Six-thirty. Alice and Jasper and Emmett and Rosalie will be there too."

I grinned. I couldn't wait to see Alice and Emmett. "I'll be there. It'll be so nice to see everyone again."

Edward smiled back. "I know they'll all be excited to see you too, Bella. We've all missed you." His eyes were so serious that I had to look away. I merely nodded. I had to tell myself not to read any more into that statement. I also reminded myself not to think of Edward like that. Just a friend. Just a friend. Nothing more. Ever. I didn't want to go down that road again. I felt my heart sink a bit. This was already getting difficult, and we were in public. What was going to happen when, inevitably, I was in the same room as he was?

Edward walked us out to my car. He was chatting with Charlie about how he was doing with the treatments so far. Charlie was fighter. He was feeling pretty good despite the bladder cancer. Luckily, they caught it fairly early. He didn't need the chemo yet. The radiation seemed to be doing the job of keeping it from spreading so far.

"Whoa, is this your car, Bella?" Edward asked once we got to the parking lot and stopped in front of my black Audi sedan. "It's a far cry from the big red truck!"

"Hey, watch it! I loved that big red truck. She just didn't last," I shook my head and had a moment of silence to remember her. She died in Tempe a year ago. What a shame. "She lived a long, happy life though. Rest in peace, Beast," I said under my breath. "You're still sticking with the silver Volvo, I see." He smiled. He loved that car. It was borderline unhealthy how much he loved that car. Guys were so weird.

So Charlie and I said goodbye to Edward. I had a couple hours before I needed to be at his parents' house. I got Charlie home and busied myself making dinner for him and Billy. I wanted to make sure Charlie was eating better than just pizza every night. My plan for when I was home with him was to cook dinner for the week and freeze portions so all Charlie would have to do was heat them up when I wasn't here. Should have been easy enough…On second thought, I also wrote instructions on how to heat up the portions. I remembered once he tried heating up spaghetti sauce in the glass jar, but the metal lid was still on it, in the microwave. I shuddered at the memory and the potential disaster.

After making the lasagna, I showered and changed. I threw on some dark wash skinny jeans and some silver ballet flats with a fitted long-sleeved grey t-shirt. Once upon a time, I'd wear a sweatshirt or something loose and baggy and comfortable, but where Alice left off in controlling my wardrobe, Coley had taken over. I had finally caught on after a couple years that I could still feel comfortable _and_ look put together at the same time. Beauty without pain or tears. What a concept! I actually used the blow dryer on my shoulder-length hair and ran a flat iron through it. That was the Coley method of doing my hair. It was actually not a huge production as long as I had the right tools. I put on a coat of mascara and lip-gloss and I was out the door. The entire process only took like half an hour. Not bad.

As I was driving, I couldn't help but think about how much had changed these past four years. I left here a heartbroken, insecure teenager. I'd like to believe that I'd grown to be comfortable in my own skin. Coley definitely helped with that. Her confidence was contagious. One of the best pieces of advice she ever gave me was that if I didn't feel confident, I should fake it. No one really could tell the difference. And you sounded like you knew what the hell you were talking about if you seemed confident. Plus, a confident person commanded attention and respect.

The confidence was easy to pull off. College was actually a great experience despite what Coley told Charlie about my social life. I mean, I dated a couple guys but nothing serious. I was invited to a few date parties and movies and dinner. The guys had even been tolerable, but when you had Edward Cullen to compare every man to, no one could possibly measure up.

I tried to forget about him. I really did, but I had seen, talked to, and hung out with him for three years, and then I just stopped. Agreed, it was my own doing, but still it hurt. I couldn't even count how many times I wanted to just call him up and tell him something funny that happened to me or gripe about a professor, but then I'd remember how I made a complete ass of myself and felt the embarrassment all over again. I didn't want to face him, yet I missed the friendship.

I guessed Edward had given up on me by the end of high school. I couldn't say that I blamed him. I really did avoid him. Alice told me a couple times how he had asked what was up with me, but being the protective friend she was, she covered for me and said I was visiting friends in Seattle. Alice knew I'd go there just to do my homework in the university library over the weekends. It wasn't a complete lie. I did befriend one of the college students who worked there.

Hal worked at the reference desk and helped me find some sources for a couple of papers. He was super nice, super cute, and super gay. We'd have coffee on his breaks. Well, he'd have coffee and I'd have hot chocolate. We would talk about boys. It seemed that Hal had boy troubles too. Our stories were similar. Well, only in the ending anyways. He asked a friend out. They had dated for a while, but ultimately the relationship didn't work out and the friendship was ruined. Hal and I would commiserate together.

I did keep in touch with Hal, and I couldn't wait to see him again. Apparently he was in a pretty stable relationship now and very happy, which made me happy as well. He deserved it. He was in real estate now. He actually owned a building in Seattle, and I was going to look at a recently vacated apartment on Friday. I was fairly sure I was going live there. It was decently priced and close to the Times building as well as campus.

I was pulling up to the Cullen house at about twenty-five after six. I had run to the florist and picked up a small bouquet of wildflowers for Esme. With all the cars in front of the house, it looked like everyone was already there. I took a minute to compose myself. _Okay, Bella. Deep breaths._ I could do this. Edward would not affect me. I had to psych myself up for this. Finally, I got out of my car.

Alice opened the door before I even rang the doorbell. Freaky how she did that. I was suddenly attacked by a blur of high heels and spiky black hair as Alice threw her arms around me. "Bella!"

I laughed as I hugged her back. "Alice! So good to see you finally. It's been forever!"

"Come in, Bella. Everyone wants to see you. Oh my god, you look so good. How'd you do that without my help?"

"I'll ignore the undertone of insult and take that as a compliment, Alice. I put myself together, thank you very much. But, I have to say, I couldn't have done it without you or Coley. You two are the fashion Jedi masters and I am merely a youngling."

Alice beamed at the compliment. Suddenly I was picked up and crushed into a bear hug. "Emmett!" I laughed. "How's it going?"

"Awesome, Bells. How are you? You look good!"

"Thanks," I smiled as he put me back down. Rosalie and Jasper were standing by and I hugged them both hello. Then Esme and Carlisle appeared from the kitchen to greet me. I handed Esme her flowers, which she was very appreciative of.

We sat down to dinner shortly after, and wouldn't you know it? I was sitting directly across from Edward. Damn it! And also much to my chagrin, I was the topic of conversation. They all wanted to know what I'd been doing since graduation last spring. I told them how I was working for a newspaper in Tempe before coming back to Washington. I had gotten the job my senior year in college after interning there the last semester of my junior year. I had also sold some freelance copy to miscellaneous magazines. Coley had told me to submit to some just for kicks to see if the magazines wanted to use my work, and to my astonishment a couple did. I'd been published in _YM_ and _Seventeen_. No, they weren't beauty editorials or anything. They were about what to expect when entering college. Yeah, real exciting stuff, but hey, I got paid for it!

They asked about life in Tempe and about Coley and Renee. They had never met Coley, but I did talk about her quite a bit so it was almost as if they knew her. Coley was now working for a hotshot interior designer in Scottsdale and loving it. It was right up her alley. She and Alice and Esme would get along so great.

"So, Alice tells us you'll be working for the Seattle Sun Times?" Esme asked. I nodded. "What will you be doing for them?"

Shoot! I didn't want to tell them I'd be writing some lame love advice column or certainly about my Lana Love porn star alias. How embarrassing. Blessedly, my cell phone rang before I could answer Esme's question. I would have turned the dumb thing off, but I kept it on in case Charlie needed me. This number on the caller ID was not Charlie, but I wanted a diversion so I answered it.

"Excuse me, I have to take this," I said as I got up from the table. I went into the living room to answer. "Hello?"

"Bella, you like books and movies." I was confused. Who was this person and why did he think that I was supposed to know who he was?

"Pardon me?" I asked.

"Bella, it's Gerald, your editor at the Sun Times. Do you like books and movies?" He was so brash. Unapologetically brash. I kind of liked it. At least my boss wouldn't beat around the bush and leave me guessing about what he wanted right?

I was starting to formulate my answer when he interrupted, "It actually doesn't really matter because I've already assigned this job to you. It just became available, and I know you wanted to do more than just Lana. So, not only will you be writing the Lana Love column once a week, you'll be doing the book and movie reviews as well. Those come out every Friday. You'll get advance screenings to new movies and advanced copies of new books. We can call you the Raving Reviewer. What do you think?" Again I was going to answer but he interjected as I was saying _sure_. "We can work on the name if you don't like it. Your first review will be of this vampire movie coming out. It's based on some best selling novel. Can you see it next Wednesday? Of course you can. You'll have until Thursday night to give me your review. Meanwhile, you have letters in your post office box here already asking for advice. That column comes out on Sundays. Don't worry about this Sunday, but be ready to for a week from this Sunday, okay? And if you want we can set you up with an anonymous email address so the questions can be submitted that way instead or as well."

I was completely stunned as I allowed all this information to sink in. "Um, all right. Thanks, Gerald. I've got it. I'll come in on Friday and pick up some of those letters_._" I whispered the _letters _part. And I hung up since I thoght he had already hung up. Goodbye to you too, boss. Wow. He needed to maybe cut back on the caffeine. Just a skosh.

I went back into the dining room and sat down. All eyes were on me again. "Sorry, that was my editor, Gerald. Um, what were we talking about?"

"You were telling us about your column for the Times," Edward reminded me.

"Oh yeah," I pretended like he jogged my memory. "You're looking at the new Raving Reviewer. I'm reviewing books and movies and my column comes out each Friday," I smiled heaving a small sigh of relief. Thank goodness Gerald called when he did. I didn't have to mention anything about love advice. Whew! Everyone seemed sufficiently happy for me as well as impressed. I had to admit, I did love seeing my name in print in the by line. "But I don't know if my name goes in the by line or if it's going to be the _Raving Reviewer_." I made a face. "I'm not sure I like that name. I sound like a bit of a lunatic, don't I? I may have to see about changing that."

"What's your first assignment, Bella?" Alice asked.

I smiled. I was actually pretty excited about this movie. "I have to review that new vampire movie on Wednesday. Who wants to go with me? Are you two in?"

Alice's face lit up. Rosalie looked excited too. We had all read this book series and loved it. "We get to see it before anyone else in Seattle?" Alice asked incredulously. I nodded. It was pretty cool.

"Is that movie based on those vampire romance novels Rosie's read?" Emmett asked rolling his eyes. "_Romantic vampires_," he scoffed. "They sound like pansy vampires to me. Let me know when you have to review a real movie, Bells. I'll go with you to that."

"Um, define _a real movie_, Emmett," I said.

"A _real movie_ has tons of action and humor and destruction, of course. Like _Ironman_."

"Okay, then what's not a real movie?" Alice asked.

"Where do I start? Pretty much any movie involving princesses, shopping, notebooks and Meg Ryan in it or with Bette Midler on the soundtrack."

"And apparently romantic vampires," I pointed out.

"Right you are, Bella," Emmett responded.

"That's pretty specific, Emmett. Alright then, you can accompany me to the next Ironman." He was very excited about that.

We spent the rest of the evening catching up. Everyone lived in the Seattle area now. Alice and Jasper were engaged. Their wedding was going to be this winter. Jasper was finishing his master's degree in computer science while working at their dad's packaging company as an IT guy. Alice was working for an actual wedding planning company (and I thought they only existed in Jennifer Lopez movies). She was currently planning the wedding for the governor's daughter.

Emmett and Rosalie had been married for almost two years now. Emmett taught social studies and history at one of the high schools in Seattle. He was the varsity football coach as well. Rosalie also worked at her dad's packaging company as an engineer.

Edward just started med school, of course, and he was loving it even though his preclinicals consisted of classroom and lab work. His eyes actually lit up when he was talking about gross anatomy lab. The medical field made him happy and even I had to smile as he spoke about it even though the _gross _part was right on. Let's face it; blood and guts were never my forte.

Despite my anxiety about going over to the Cullen house for dinner, I was very happy that I went. It was great seeing everyone again, even Edward. The fun conversation kept my mind off of the past and made it a lot easier to talk to him. It was like old times.

We called it a night after nine o'clock. Everyone else was going back to Seattle, and I had an early morning.

I was going into Seattle in the morning to meet Hal for coffee and then take a look at the apartment. Alice and Rosalie wanted to meet for lunch so we made plans to meet at a local deli at noon. After that I'd stop by the Times to meet with Gerald and pick up some of those bloody letters seeking love advice.

The traffic into Seattle was terrible, but I got to the correct Starbucks on time. When I walked in, Hal was already waiting for me ready to give me a great big hug. It was so great to see him again. We ordered our drinks and engaged in some small talk before we started walking down the street and around the corner to his building. It was early September and the weather was still very nice. I liked that the coffee shop was within walking distance of my potential new apartment.

Hal's building was three blocks from the Starbucks. It was convenient in that the building was on a block among other apartment buildings, but all were around the corner from the downtown area where there were businesses, including the paper, the hospital, and shopping. There was even a parking garage for his building. So far I was loving it. Then I saw the apartment and that sealed the deal. It wasn't really spacious, but I didn't have much stuff anyway. It was on the fifth floor. There were two bedrooms so I could use one for my office, one bathroom, a decent sized living slash dining room and a cute little kitchen. There was laundry in a little room next to the kitchen. The view out the window overlooked downtown. It was everything I needed and nothing I didn't want.

"Hal, this place is perfect!" I said as I hugged him. "Where do I sign?"

He laughed. "I thought you'd like it. It's a fairly quiet building as well. Young couples and college students in grad school. No rowdy frat boys here. Your neighbor across the hall is really cute too, Bella. And from what I hear he's single." Hal sighed. "Unfortunately he's straight."

I shoved his shoulder playfully. "Hal, you have a boyfriend! Cut that out!"

"Hey, I can still look right? Well, it's unfortunate for me but good for you. Coley tells me you're not dating much." Damn, Coley talked to Hal too! Well, I had told her about him and he'd call occasionally so Coley got to know Hal that way. He even visited us in Tempe a couple times. They'd talk about me and Mr. X, as I referred to Edward. Obviously Coley knew Edward by name, but when I met Hal and we got to talking about our guy problems, he referred to his as Mr. Why so I took to calling Edward Mr. X. Hal didn't know who Mr. X really was.

"Oh, Shane and I have extra furniture if you need anything. In fact, Shane didn't like the new bed I bought so we're having a new one delivered later today. You can have our old one if you want. I think it's pretty nice."

I gave him an _are you out of your mind _look and he quickly added, "Don't worry, girl, we haven't even used it. It's pristine. Give me some credit! I wouldn't give you a used mattress!"

"All right," I said warily, "There better not be any DNA on that bad boy." I shuddered at the thought.

"And you know what? Shane wants to unleash his inner Martha Stewart and redecorate our place so can I decorate your place?" Hal was looking really excited, like Alice and Coley looked when they wanted to make me over. I knew better than to really put up a fight since it would only make things worse. They weren't really giving me a choice when they asked if I wanted them to style me.

I rolled my eyes. "You really want to do that, Hal? You don't have to. I'm not completely incompetent you know."

"Oh, no, I can see that. Your style has much improved since the first day I met you at the library. You were looking all sad in faded jeans, old sneakers, and a big sweatshirt. And your hair!"

"Okay, okay. I get it, Hal. I was a mess, but give me a break, I was only eighteen."

"But now look at you. Chicy-chic. I have Alice and Coley to thank for that, I know. _You're almost _as chic as me! But please let me do this for you."

"So you can unleash your inner Martha Stewart?"

Hal made a face. "Honey, please! I've got Nate Berkus in me."

I laughed, "You _wish_ you had Nate Berkus in you, Hal." I had to admit, Nate Berkus was fine. Too bad he played for the other team.

"Don't I know it!" Hal laughed along with me.

"So when can I move in?" I asked.

"Is Sunday too soon? I can get this all done today and tomorrow. Don't worry about a thing. Leave it to me."

"Thanks, Hal. I really appreciate it. But don't go overboard, all right? Don't make it look…" I was trying to be diplomatic.

"Like a queen lives here?" Hal finished for me looking at me sideways with a hand on his hip. I smiled.

"Exactly!" I gave him a hug so he knew it wasn't an insult. Hal was so cool. I loved that he was so comfortable with who he wss: my favorite queen.

"So tell me. Are you over Mr. X yet?" Hal asked. "Because the last time I talked to Coley, she said you weren't."

I sighed. "What did she say, and how often do you and Coley talk anyways?"

"She merely said that even though you don't talk about him as often now she can still tell you're mind was on him. And looking at you now, I'd have to agree. Because if you were over him, you wouldn't even hesitate with a _Hell, yes, I'm over him! or Mr. X, who?_"

I thought a moment. That was a true statement. I thought that I was getting over Edward, but when I saw him again at the hospital, all the feelings came back. "You know me too well, Hal. I saw him and his family last night. We had dinner."

"_And?"_

I shrugged. "It wasn't as awkward as I thought it'd be, but yes, I think I'm still in love with him. Don't ask me why. I haven't had any contact with him over the years except for a few minutes over the holidays when we were home visiting family."

Hal thought for a moment. "It's probably because you never got closure. At least when I hooked up with Mr. Why we let the relationship run its course. You were always left wondering about what could have been."

I looked at Hal as I let that sink in. He was staring back at me with a look that said he knew that I knew that he was right. He put his arm around me. "Don't worry, Bella. Maybe one day you can get over Mr. X." Suddenly his tone brightened. "And I know just the way!" Uh-oh.

Hal took my hand and dragged me across the hall from my apartment. "I'm supposed to stop by anyways to check on the broken central air so you may as well meet your new neighbor," he smiled.

"Haaaal!" I whined. I did not want to be set up. I was sick of being set up. I got enough of that from Coley in Tempe.

"Babygirl, if there's anyone who can make you forget about Mr. X it's this hottie across the way. You meet him and I defy you to tell me he isn't scrumptious."

I sighed. Closing my eyes, I hid behind him as Hal knocked on the door of 5B. Why me?

I heard the door open, "Halston. Hello. Thanks for coming by."

My eyes popped open. I knew that voice. "Of course! You're one of my favorite tenants. _And_, I want you to meet your new neighbor as well. This is…"

"Bella," he said as I stepped out from behind Hal.

I smiled sheepishly, "Hi." He looked back at me in astonishment.

"You two know each other?" Hal asked in surprise as he looked from Edward to me.

**A/N Oh, I know, you saw that coming didn't you? Tell how you liked the chapter anyways. Review please!**


	3. Mars and Venus

**A/N I Don't own Twilight, just borrowing the characters.**

**Have you seen the covers of Entertainment Weekly? Mmmm. Rob Pattinson. The soundtrack is OK I think. I like the Linkin Park song, but expected a little more for Bella's lullaby. How can Edward hum that to her? Haha. Still good stuff.**

**Happy Veteran's Day. Here's my present to you. Read, enjoy, and review please!**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 3 EPoV**

This was all so bizarre. What happened to Bella? When did she become so…intriguing? No, she'd always been intriguing. But had she always been this self-assured and…hot? This hot? I thought back to high school. We were such good friends and then…and then things got weird. I had just met Tanya and asked her to our prom. I was going to tell Bella about it, but then she had brought up the subject of some guy that caught her eye and I got very curious. She never seemed to be interested in anyone though a lot of the guys in high school were very interested in her. I guess I never viewed her in that light. Yeah, she was attractive, but she was my best friend. The key word being _was_.

After she asked me to prom the friendship went down the tubes. I thought it was salvageable, but I never got a chance to talk to Bella about it. I could never get her alone. She was always busy. Too busy, it seemed, for me. Even Alice didn't get to spend as much time with her as she used to after the prom thing. But to be fair, Alice and Jasper were getting pretty serious then, and Tanya and I started to date for a couple months. It never worked out with Tanya anyways. She was nice enough, but I never really felt a spark. She went away to a school in Alaska anyway. Last I heard, she married some guy she met there and they lived in Juneau.

In hindsight, it took a lot of guts for Bella to ask me and then I shot her down without even thinking really. Should I have said yes and broken the date with Tanya and gone with Bella instead? But at the time I didn't really feel that way about Bella, so no. But maybe I wouldn't have ruined the friendship. Maybe then she would have been around more. Maybe then she would have gone to school here in Washington. Maybe then she wouldn't be almost a stranger to me now.

Bella never hung out at school events. Obviously, she skipped the prom. She always seemed to be distracted when I would attempt to approach her at school. Then there was Seattle. She seemed to be going there a lot that last month of high school. Alice said she was visiting friends. I assumed that she met a guy and was seeing him on the weekends, which was why she was never around. I never heard much about the mystery boyfriend though. I only hoped that she was happy no matter who she was seeing or what she was doing.

The last words we had said to each other were _I'm sorry_. I wondered what she meant by that. I know I meant that I was sorry to ruin our friendship; I was sorry that I wasn't around much for her anymore. I had no idea what _she_ could have been sorry about.

I thought about calling or emailing her that first year of college. Lord knows I wanted to. She used to be my go to person for griping and venting and also for happy moments to share, like when I met Tanya and…oh…right. I supposed if she liked me she wouldn't want to hear about other girls…Hmm. How much did I talk about other girls to her?...Shit! No wonder she didn't want to hang out with me. I couldn't believe I drove my best friend away.

And then with each school year my course load grew heavier and heavier. I was neck deep in science classes and labs. Sometimes double labs. I guess ours was a case of out of sight out of mind. At least on my end. I was reminded of Bella over the holiday breaks when she came back to Forks to visit Charlie and then Alice and my family. Those visits were always brief though. Alice would hog Bella anyway, spending the little time Bella had home in Alice's room or over at Charlie's house. I'd get to see Bella for about five minutes at a time. Too little time to barely start up the small talk let alone delve into deeper conversations about school and life in general. The cycle would begin again once we left Forks and went back to our respective schools.

Perhaps now that Bella was in Washington indefinitely we could catch up again. Maybe even…Nah, I was getting ahead of myself now. I shook my head in a lame attempt to rid my brain of indecent thoughts about Bella. I couldn't help it though. From the moment I saw her again at the hospital with Charlie, I hadn't been able to get her off my mind. I chalked it up to just not having been around her these past four years, but now I wasn't sure it wasn't because I was maybe interested in Bella.

I knew I've always liked her. I mean, you couldn't be friends with someone without liking them, but something was different about her now. Yeah, she looked good. Really good actually. She was dressing to accentuate her beauty, not to overcompensate for anything like some women did. She wasn't flashy at all. She looked put together and comfortable with herself, and that was extremely sexy.

Last night after dinner, I drove back to Seattle with Jasper and Alice. We stopped at Emmett and Rosalie's house because Jasper needed to pick up tools. Jasper was going to cut out a little doggy door in their kitchen since he and Alice were planning on getting a dog. I had asked Alice if it was cool if I joined her and Rosalie at lunch with Bella. I wouldn't have class on Friday because I had lecture on Wednesday and then we attended an autopsy Thursday morning at the coroner's office to replace classtime. She and Rosalie agreed to it even though they wanted it to be female bonding time. They decided to bond at a later date since Bella didn't have a lot of time due to having to go to the paper in the afternoon anyways.

"Alice, how often did you talk to Bella though undergrad?" I asked my sister when we were all sitting around Emmett's living room.

"Um, pretty much every week. Why?" Alice answered sounding a little perplexed.

I shrugged. "What'd you guys talk about?"

Alice gave me a look as if to say _Are you crazy_? "That's between me and Bella and Coley," she answered indignantly.

"_Coley_? I thought you've never met Coley."

"No, but I've talked to her. She's really cool. Bella says we could be twins, Coley and I." Alice was smiling but then scrutinized my face. "What's your deal, Edward?"

I shook my head. "You know, I never talked to her much after graduation. Or even the last month of school leading up to graduation…I guess I messed things up," I said that last part almost to myself.

"How'd you do that?" Jasper asked.

"Did you know that Bella had asked me to the senior prom and I said no?"

"_What_?" Rosalie shrieked the same time Jasper and Emmett asked, "Are you an idiot?"

Alice merely shook her head at the memory.

"Alice, _you knew_?" I asked.

She rolled her eyes at me. "Of course I knew. She's my best friend."

"Dude, she asked you out and you said no?" Emmett asked.

"Esme and I always thought you two would be good together," Rosalie mused. I turned to look at Rosalie a moment. I had no idea.

I ignored my brother and then stared at Alice willing her to give me more information.

"What?" she asked.

"Well, why was she so distant at the end of the school year?"

"Dude, she asked you out and you said no," Emmett repeated his last comment only this time, it wasn't a question; it was a statement. "I would have been distant too."

I ignored Emmett again. "Did she have a secret boyfriend?" I asked. "She was in Seattle a lot."

Alice snorted and then started to laugh hysterically. "_Boyfriend_? Certainly not. She did make a friend here, a very good friend. But _not_ a boyfriend." What the hell did that mean? I sighed out of frustration. "What, Edward, are you suddenly interested in Bella now?"

Everyone's eyes were on me expectantly awaiting my response.

"I don't know. Maybe," I lied. Of course I was interested. They kept looking at me, unsatisfied with my answer. "Okay, yes. I'm very interested." I looked at Alice. "Do you think I have a chance? Did I mess things up that badly?"

"Oh, you messed things up pretty badly. Coley and I were very worried about her. That's when I started talking to Coley regularly, just to make sure Bella was all right. Bella was…You know what? I shouldn't be telling you this."

"No, come on, Alice. I want to know. I _need_ to know. How bad did I mess up?"

Alice sighed and looked around the room as if to get encouragement to spill. Rosalie verbalized what the others and myself wanted to say, "We all want to know so that we can help." I smiled at Rosalie thanking her.

"Okay fine. Most of this is per Coley because Bella was too embarrassed to actually tell me the gory details herself. All she said about the prom was that she asked you to it and it didn't work out. Then she stopped hanging around us. Coley said it was mostly because Bella just wanted to avoid _you_, Edward, but since you were occasionally in the same places I was, I was affected as well. Thanks a lot, by the way," Alice added sarcastically. Emmett and Rosalie just looked ruefully at me and shook their heads.

"I'm sorry!" I yelled at them. "Go on, Alice. Bella was avoiding me because…"

"Emmett was right. She asked you out and you said no. She felt like an idiot. She was too embarrassed to face you, you moron! You said you wanted to just stay friends. Well, what did you expect her to do? Seeing you only reminded her of how stupid she felt for misreading your cues. I mean, do you really think Bella of all people would go out on a limb like that and then be expected to act the same after being rejected?"

_Ouch. Rejected_ was such a harsh word, but that's exactly what I did to her.

"How was she in college?" I asked.

"Heartbroken mostly," Alice said matter-of-factly. "Coley tried to help her forget you. Fixed her up a few times."

I suddenly was both silently cursing Coley the traitor and sad for Bella being heartbroken. Alice seemed to be reading my thoughts, or maybe she just read my facial expression, "Shut up, Edward, Coley did the exact same thing I would have done if Bella had been going to school here." Alice started texting on her phone. When she finished, she looked at me again, "So don't blame Coley or me or anyone else who tried to help Bella forget her first love." Alice cupped her hand over her mouth and had a look of horror in her eyes. "Shit! I've said too much."

I swallowed. _Love_? Bella loved me? As in she was _in love_ with me? And the ass that I was, I didn't see it and turned her down. But I didn't want her to feel embarrassed for asking me to prom. I mean, guys asked girls out all the time and get shot down. I just assumed it would roll off of her. Clearly I had zero insight into the female mind.

And now what about me? Was I in love with Bella? I definitely was interested. I didn't know if I were in love, and I hadn't really talked to her properly in what seemed like forever. For sure I wanted to explore my feelings for her.

My thoughts were interrupted by a buzzing. Alice's phone was on silent but it was vibrating. She answered it, "Hey," pause, "Yep," another pause as Alice looked at me, "Mmmhmm. Okay. Hold on." Alice handed me the phone. "Coley wants to talk to you," my sister said bluntly.

I swallowed as I took the phone from Alice. I'd only heard of Coley. I'd never talked to her before. I wondered what she wanted. "Hello?"

"Edward? Hi, I'm Coley," said a soft but also blunt voice. "Alice tells me you _may_ be _finally_ coming to your senses?" Now she sounded a little pissed.

"Um, I…well," I started stammering. I had no idea how to respond to this person who cut right to the chase. She didn't even allow me to fumble over my words for very long.

"Here's the thing, Edward. I'm very protective of Bella, as is Alice. We do not want to see her hurt like that again so I know you don't know me, but can you do me a solid and really think about how you feel? Do not attempt anything without knowing for sure that you return her feelings."

Her words caused me to sit up a little straighter, "_return?"_ I repeated.

"Yes, that's what I said. I'm not going to lie and play coy and say _I'm not sure she still loves you_. She'll kick my ass if she knew I was telling you this, but she never got over you for some reason. The girl has it bad," I started to smile a little but it was like she read my thoughts as well, "But don't get cocky. Here's my point. Don't try anything with her unless you know for sure you return her feelings, and even then I would caution you. She's put up a pretty good guard around her heart, and I can't say that I blame her. She tormented herself for years about opening herself up to you only to get her heart ripped out." I reacted again to her choice of words, wincing when Coley said _ripped out_. "I'm sorry to be so blunt, but I try not to mince words."

"I understand," I nodded even though she couldn't see me. "So you think it'll be difficult to reach her?" I asked.

"Unbelievably difficult. You see, she's spent years trying to drown out her feelings for you only to have them resurface. She even stopped talking about you a whole lot to me, but I could tell she still thought about you because once in a while she'd get this real faraway, wistful look in her eyes. Now, remember, if you end up not returning her feelings, do not, I repeat, do not say a word about what I just said, or so help me I will hunt you down myself. I am just trying to protect Bella so don't go asking her out with just feeling a strong like towards her or even worse, lust. Frankly, I don't think she'd accept a date if you asked her out right now anyway. I give her credit though. The fact that she has already faced you and your family shows just how far she's come. I know she missed your friendship a lot though. And…are you still there?"

"Yes," I assured her. I guess I'd been really quiet, maybe even holding my breath, as I took in her little discourse.

"One more piece of advice. Don't dredge up the past. If you open up old wounds, you'll be taking two steps back. Just work on the friendship for now. And perhaps the love stuff will follow, but if it doesn't it doesn't. I just know she wouldn't want the friendship ruined again. Kapeesh?"

"Got it," I breathed. "Thanks a lot, Coley."

"You're welcome, Edward. It was nice to talk at you finally," she joked. I chuckled a little. "Can you put Alice back on?" Her voice was still soft but much friendlier now.

"Sure. Bye." I handed the phone back to Alice. They spoke for a little while longer discussing what sounded like flower arrangements. Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie were staring at me expectantly so I recounted Coley's rant to them. They seemed to agree with everything Coley had said. We all looked at Alice when she snapped her phone shut telling Coley goodbye.

"Flower arrangements?" I asked warily.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Relax, _Edward_. Not everything is about you. Coley is getting married and we were discussing her bouquet and centerpieces."

"Oh."

"So what did we decide?" Alice asked the group. I was sure Coley caught her up to speed about our talk.

"I'm going to rebuild the friendship and then proceed with caution," I informed her. Everyone nodded approving of the game plan.

"That Coley girl was right on," Emmett said. "And I think I'd help her kick your ass if you hurt Bella again." He grinned evilly at me as he cracked his knuckles. Then he seemed to remember something as he narrowed his eyes and shook his head at me again, "Dude, I can't believe she asked you out and you said no! You should get a retroactive ass kicking anyway."

Jasper was quick to inform him though, "Emmett, if we're talking about retroactive ass kickings, you'd be beaten to a bloody pulp by my sister alone for all the stupid stuff you've done in the past as well as the present." Emmett thought for a second and nodded in concession. It was a true story.

So that was last night, and now I just found out that Bella was moving in across the hall? I must have done something good to receive this kind of good luck. Wow. I couldn't believe it. Bella was moving in across the hall. Standing there looking at her, I tried not to stare, but I couldn't look away. It seemed we were destined to be near each other. And Halston was genuinely surprised that we knew each other.

"We're old friends," Bella informed Halston giving him what seemed to be a very meaningful look. She turned toward me and was smiling at me. I smiled back and nodded to confirm. _Old friends_. Maybe more…

"How nice!" Halston was nearly bouncing in excitement. "Okay, Bells, I will at the very least get the bed delivered so you can stay in your apartment tonight, and then I'll get most of the decorating done ASAP!" Then he sighed. "I need to call Coley." Whoa! He knew Coley too?

Bella narrowed her eyes at him, "Wait, Hal. Why do you need to call Coley?" she asked warily.

Halston rolled his eyes, "Relax, Bella. She told me about this metallic green colored paint and I want to use it for your apartment, girl."

"Oh," Bella must've found this explanation plausible. "Okay."

"Here's your key," he handed a couple copies to Bella. "You know, you may be able to fully move in tomorrow. I'll get Shane to help me. He'll be so excited. You know how lucky you are, Bella? Martha Stewart and Nate Berkus decorating your pad with consultation from Coley. You'll be living large, honey!"

Bella closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "Hal remember who the apartment is for okay?"

"I know. I know. Don't worry. It won't look like a drag club or anything. Relax. I'll see you two later," he kissed Bella's cheek and then skipped off. Literally, he skipped off. I'd never witnessed a grown man skipping before. I was tempted to tell him to say hi to Coley for me, but obviously I didn't.

Bella and I watched him go then she turned to me, "Sorry. I guess your central air issue just got put on the back burner." She gave me an apologetic expression. She was so adorable.

I shrugged. "That's okay. It's not that hot anymore at night." We stood out in the hall a moment in silence. "So do you want to come in real quick?" I checked the time. We weren't due at the deli for another forty-five minutes, and luckily it was just around the corner. I loved this building. It was close to everything.

"Um," Bella looked a little hesitant and I had to remind myself to proceed with caution. I explained to her that I was going to lunch with them if she didn't mind. "Oh, okay." She approved. This was good. She didn't hate to be around me. Not hating is definitely progress. She came in and sat down in my living room but checked out the layout of my place from there, probably to compare it to her own. "Nice," she smiled at me. "Did you decorate it yourself?"

I shook my head. "No way. With Alice and Esme in the family, no one needs to decorate on their own. I couldn't have if I wanted to."

Bella laughed. "True. Hal's taken it upon himself to do my place. Pray for me, Edward. I hope it's not completely over the top."

I laughed as well. "Yeah, that could potentially get out of hand real fast. Tell you what, if it is too _over the top_, you can always escape the sequins and beads by coming over here." I said it before I could even filter it. Crap. I hoped that wasn't too forward. I quickly gauged her reaction.

Bella's eyes widened for a fraction of a second but otherwise didn't seem appalled by my suggestion. "Thanks," she said brightly. "And I won't tell him you said that." I thought she was referring to the coming over comment, but she clarified giggling, "_Sequins and beads_."

I chuckled too. "I suppose that was stereotypical, huh?" Talking about Halston reminded me of something I was going to ask her but got sidetracked. "So, you and Halston seem to be pretty good friends."

She grinned, "Yeah, I met him senior year in high school," then her smile faltered a little. Crap. I just dredged up the past didn't I? "I met him at the university library. He helped me with research and stuff. We became good friends actually. I came here to visit him a lot."

"Oh," I thought a moment. He was the guy. "And I thought you had a secret boyfriend then," I smirked but then immediately regretted saying anything. Damn. It was going to be difficult to censor myself. She didn't make a big deal out of it though.

Bella snorted. "_Clearly_ not." At least she was comfortable enough around me to laugh.

"Yes," I smiled. "Clearly." The thought of Halston as Bella's boyfriend was laughable, not that he probably wasn't a good boyfriend to _Shane_ is it? But well, obviously, he batted for the other team.

We spent the next half hour talking about Charlie and her mom. Renee relocated to Florida with her husband Phil. Bella had thought about moving to Florida as well, but then Charlie got sick and she decided to be closer to him since she was all the family Charlie had.

"Plus, I get to see everyone again," she smiled. We looked at each other for a moment and she said quietly, "I've missed you guys."

I nodded. "Same here. It seemed we never got to talk much when you were home for breaks. Hopefully we can make up for lost time, neighbor?"

"Definitely," Bella agreed.

We left for lunch on foot and met Rosalie and Alice at the deli. Lunch was a fun. We just ate and chatted about Seattle and what to do here on the weekends. Alice got a phone call about work that distressed her though.

"Shoot, Bella. I can't make the movie Wednesday night. It's this account I'm on with the Governor's daughter. That's apparently the only time her mom and she can meet with the caterer and cake maker. I swear if this weren't such a high profile account, I'd ditch the bridezilla." Alice was pouting. "Now I have to miss the gorgeous and romantic vampire!"

"That's okay, Alice. We can go together later. Rose are you still in?" Bella asked.

Rose made eye contact with me for the briefest of moments before answering. "Sorry, Bella. We're launching a new packaging product at work so I have to be there in case the machinery goes berserk. Let's do a girls night out next weekend or something. That way we can have dinner together and then see the movie. I'm pretty sure Emmett's tirade about real and not real movies last night means he won't take me to this one."

Bella smiled at her as did I. "That's okay Rose. The girls night out sounds fun as long as we don't have to play Bella Barbie." She eyed Alice.

"Bella, you don't even need our help anymore. Look at you," Alice gushed.

Bella blushed and waved off the compliment. "So I'm going solo I guess," she sighed.

I felt a pointy shoe kick my shin under the table. It was Alice. "Um, Bella, I'm free Wednesday night. I'll go with you if you want."

Rose and Alice were smiling at me through their eyes. Bella just made a face. Shoot. She probably didnn't want me to go with her. "You don't mind watching a non-real movie with me?"

I shrugged. "I could do a review for Emmett so that if it's good he can take Rose to it."

Bella smiled at me, "You know what? That's a great idea. I bet Gerald would really like that too. A review from a male and female perspective on things. Hey, maybe I don't have to be the Raving Reviewer on my own. We could be…Mars and Venus on books and movies or something." She looked at me and then her smile faded. "Sorry, Edward. I didn't mean to just assume that you would be a part of this. I just thought it'd be a good idea. I could probably get another guy from the paper to review with me. I know you're busy and stuff…"

There's no way I was going to let another guy in on this awesome gig that just fell into my lap. I may have been stupid in the past, but I was no fool. "Oh, no, I'm in, Bella." I was _so_ in! As Emmett would say, _Booyah!_

**A/N There you go. What do you think of Bella and Edward teaming up for reviews? Review about the reviewers reviewing!**


	4. O Captain! My Captain!

**Finally! Success!**

**A/N I don't own Twilight. Just borrowing the characters and bits from the book as I allude to it--you'll see later on this chapter.**

**I meant to post in the middle of the night, but FanFic kept giving me an error message. It was a little frustrating. As I write this a/n FanFic still hasn't let me post. Actually, I can't even upload my document (no I don't have more than 15 documents on my list). Anyone else have problems or is it just me? But for the record, this chapter was ready to go Saturday morning, Nov. 15.**

**Read, enjoy, and review please.**

Can't Let Go chp 4

BPoV

I only spent about a half hour with Alice, Rose and Edward at lunch since I had to go to the paper still. Lunch was a lot of fun. I really missed hanging out with them and vowed to do it as much as possible now that I was living in Seattle.

I was apprehensive at first about living so close to Edward, but the thought of seeing him on a regular basis between the apartment and Mars and Venus made me smile. I had my friend back. Surprisingly, I hadn't felt the least bit uncomfortable around him save for the brief moment when he asked me to come inside his apartment. Then it hit me, really hit me. Mars and Venus! Oh my god! I couldn't believe I talked Edward into doing the review column with me. I spoke before I could even think about the consequences. But it was a really good idea, the concept of it I mean, and I had a notion that Gerald would like it, which proved to be true.

After lunch, I stopped by the Times office to see Gerald. He was so funny. Gerald was in his fifties and was married with teenage children, all girls. I could tell he probably got run over at home so he overcompensated by asserting himself at the paper. But his was truly a case of his bark being worse than his bite. Yes, he was gruff and crotchety, but underneath the irritable exterior was a teddy bear. Well, not quite a teddy bear. That's a stretch. Gerald was more like a cat. Now, I'd never been a cat person. They seemed to like me, but I'd never been a fan. I'd always wanted a dog personally. But like a cat, Gerald was nice to you on his own terms, and there was no predicting when he'd turn on you hissing or clawing. But he'd be kind to you again. He didn't hold grudges or anything, I was told.

So I told Gerald about my friend, Edward accompanying me to the screening and that he was willing to write a review for men, whether or not it was tolerable enough for them to go with their wives or girlfriends to see. Gerald thought the idea of Mars and Venus on books and movies was a grand idea and was anxious to see if the readers agreed with us.

I settled into my cubicle at the Times and Gerald walked me around to introduce me to the staff. There were a couple writers my age, but the rest seemed to be long time journalists having been at it for over ten years or more. They were all really nice and told me to let them know if I needed anything to holler at them. Liz, the food critic was especially kind and told me I was welcome to accompany her on any assignments to get to know the hip places to eat in Seattle. I would definitely be hanging out with her frequently on those alleged assignments. Really, eating on the company dime and then writing about whether the food was any good and whether to recommend the establishment to people seemed like a dream job. Even Liz admitted she couldn't believe she got paid for it.

I picked up some letters to Lana Love, or LaLo as I'd started to refer to that entity. I kept them unopened in my workbag in the trunk of my car until the office at my apartment was finished.

I returned to my apartment to check on its progress, but Hal wouldn't let me go in.

The door and all the windows were wide open when I arrived. Shane and Hal had just finished painting a few hours ago apparently and were airing the place out. They were bringing down furniture from their apartment, which took up the whole sixth floor. I was disappointed I couldn't see the place. I mean, it wasn't like we were on an episode of _Trading Spaces_, but they wouldn't relent. These guys didn't mess around when it came to decorating I guess.

"Come back tomorrow. I don't want you to see it until it's done," Hal told me.

"Come on. Can't I have a peek?" I whined. I was very curious, I even tilted my head and pouted a bit. Hal wouldn't budge.

"Uh-uh, honey. That may work on straight men, but you're wasting your time using that heart breaking expression on me. Come. Back. To-mor-row!" He annunciated the last three syllables slowly as if I were mentally incapable of understanding it as a whole word.

"Fine," I sighed dejectedly. Hal and I turned towards Edward's door as we heard it open. He must have heard us shouting in the hall. Well, _I_ wasn't shouting, but Hal was rather animated. More so than usual, especially since he learned that Edward was my Mr. X..

"Hey, break it up out here," Edward joked, but he sounded serious and it took me a moment to catch on. "I'm trying to get some sleep." He had his gorgeous crooked smile on his perfect face.

My eyes widened and my mouth fell open. I felt bad for disturbing him. I was about to apologize. I supposed my face showed how repentant I felt because Edward quickly said, "I'm just kidding. It's only seven o'clock."

I sighed in relief. "Oh, I'm glad we didn't disturb you then."

"Oh, you guys definitely caught my attention. I just wasn't asleep. I was reading but came out to see what the commotion was."

I made a face. "Hal won't let me see my own apartment."

"Not until it's done," Hal clarified. "Which will be tomorrow."

"But, Hal. I don't want to drive back to Forks only to come back tomorrow. Can't I just run through to my bedroom? I promise not to peek," I tried to bargain.

"Girl, you can barely walk properly when you have your eyes open. How are you going to run through real quick without killing yourself? The answer is no anyway. I'd let you stay upstairs with us, but you'll see what I'm using to decorate. Maybe you can stay with Alice tonight?" Hal seemed to be looking over my shoulder at Edward as he spoke to me.

I nodded. "Okay, I'll give Alice a call." I was about to hit the send button on my phone when Edward stopped me.

"Actually, Alice and Jasper are out tonight at some work party, I think. Um, why don't you stay here tonight, Bella? I mean, I have a spare room you know. That way you can spy on the goings on in your apartment," he added with a devilish smile.

Whoa! Stay at Edward's? I barely had time to process the offer before Hal jumped in. "That sounds perfect, Edward! Except for the spying part. Oooh, Bella. Do you need to borrow a kimono to sleep in? Between Shane and I we should have one that will fit you."

My head automatically tilted as what he just asked me sunk in, "You sleep in a kimo…Nevermind. Um, no thanks. I'll pass on the kimono," I said as diplomatically as I could. "I think I may have sweats in my car." I turned to Edward. "So, I guess I'll take you up on your offer, if that's okay. I don't want to impose," I bit my lip a little. Nervous habit.

"Of course it's okay, Bella. You wouldn't be imposing at all," Edward assured me.

"Great. Now that that's settled. Bella, I love you, but go away. Actually, I'll go away. Upstairs, but I'll be back down. No peeking! Edward, if you want your central air fixed, no, I haven't forgotten, then you'll keep her from the peep hole!" Hal kissed my cheeked and skipped off. He certainly was spry.

"Okay. Well, then thanks, Edward. I'll just run down to my car and get my stuff." I started to turn on my heel when I felt his hand on my shoulder and a jolt of electricity course through me. I immediately froze in place. I couldn't help but stare at his hand that was touching me.

Edward quickly let go. "Sorry," he apologized. "Um, have you had dinner yet, Bella? I was about to order some Chinese. You in?"

"You know, that sounds really good. I think I've only had a handful of pretzels since lunch."

"Alright. Hold on a moment." He ducked inside his apartment to get his wallet and came right back out. "Shall we?" he asked offering me his elbow.

"We shall," I nodded slipping my arm though his. It seemed like the thing to do, and it didn't feel weird.

We decided to walk to the restaurant and order our take out there and then tour around the neighborhood until our food was ready so then I'd get to know the area a little better. Edward told me the best places to order from and which places to avoid. Not that I didn't trust him, but I made a mental list so I could double check with Liz later on. I would avoid bad food if I could.

As we walked back to the apartments with our food, I told Edward about my meeting with Gerald earlier.

"Gerald really digs the Mars and Venus take on the column, Edward. Actually, he's pretty excited about it. He says I have free reign, within reason of course, over the content of my columns."

"_Columns_?" he asked. _Shoot! I slipped_. "Do you have more than the one?"

"I meant the reviews. I have free reign over the content of my reviews," I corrected. He nodded his head, and I sighed. _Good he bought it_.

"Well, you should. They are, by definition, your opinion," he pointed out.

"And yours too," I corrected. Edward chuckled as he agreed with me. "But, Edward, you have to promise me something," I said seriously.

"What is it?" he looked concerned.

"Promise me, if you're too busy to do this you'll let me know? I don't want to interfere with your regular schoolwork. And don't feel like you have to do this either. I can find someone from the paper to help me if and when you get too busy or bored with this thing. Don't be a hero, Edward."

He merely smiled. "Thanks for giving me an out, but I think I can handle this." I opened my mouth to say something, but he put up a finger to stop me, "I promise I'll let you know though," he added to appease me.

I smiled in response. "Thanks."

We stopped at my car before heading up to Edward's apartment. I grabbed my work bag which held my laptop and those LaLo letters. "Shoot. I guess I took my little suitcase out and left it at Charlie's." I wasn't planning on going back until tomorrow night or Sunday.

"Don't worry, Bella. You can borrow a t-shirt and shorts or something. Granted, they're nothing compared to a _kimono_…" Edward smirked as he took my bag so I wouldn't have to carry it. Very gentlemanly of him. I had to smile.

"Never in my life have I ever worn a kimono, and I'm not ashamed to admit that."

"Me neither," Edward said.

Suddenly the thought and visual of Edward Cullen in a kimono flashed in my mind's eye and I started snickering.

"What?" Edward asked looking at me curiously.

"Nothing. Just the idea of you in a kimono amuses me," I giggled. Edward rolled his eyes.

He opened his mouth then immediately shut it, shaking his head. It was my turn to ask him what's up. "Grown men in kimonos," he muttered. "Not right."

We continued to laugh as we made it to the elevator. Once we got off on our floor we caught a glimpse of Shane and Hal moving a table into my place. The door of my apartment slammed shut and all we could hear was Hal shouting, "No peeking, Bella!"

"No trust, I swear," I mumbled shaking my head.

We went inside Edward's apartment and started eating right away. I mixed my Princess Chicken up with my noodles. Mmm. Heaven. Edward was having Kung Pao beef, which I stole a bite of. "Not bad. Not as good as mine though," I informed him.

I let him taste my dinner. He shrugged, "Yeah, that's a pretty good combination," he conceded.

"So what were you reading when Hal and I distracted you?" I asked in between bites.

Edward wiped his mouth with a napkin then got up and walked over to his coffee table grabbing a thick black paperback. It looked new. He set it on the table next to me. I smiled as I recognized the book. He was reading the novel that the vampire movie we were going to see was based on. I have to say, I was really impressed. I didn't know of any guys who had read it, except for Hal and Shane, but you know…

I gave Edward an approving smile as I flipped through it to see where he left off. He was over halfway through, at the part when the main character was meeting the vampire's family. "Ahh," I commented. He was past the pivotal meadow scene. I smiled as I remembered that part of the story. "You're through the best part. When did you start this?"

"I picked it up right after lunch. I figured I should read it before I see the film and complain about how much it deviates from the book. It's a pretty good read. I don't usually read books in a teenage girl's first person point of view. In fact, this is a first. It's surprisingly insightful and I couldn't put it down," he commented.

"Yeah, I think the popularity of this series stems from every woman's ability to identify with the main character. And the hot vampire definitely doesn't hurt. Plus, their relationship is so fascinating isn't it?"

Edward looked thoughtful, "Yeah. Their love is so passionate. It's complex and undeniable. So…how does it end? Does he turn her?" he asked.

I shook my head. "No way. Read the book, Cullen!"

"So are you obsessed with that vampire guy like the ladies at the bookstore are?"

I grinned, "Oh, yeah!"

Edward rolled his eyes. "You know, he's several decades older than her. It's sick if you really stop and think about it…"

"No, Edward. Do not ruin it by over thinking. Can't I just maintain my fantasy of the perfect man?" I mused.

"Come on, Bella. This guys seems like a…"

"No. Uh-uh," I cut him off. "Do not trash talk my vampire, Edward. You're playing with fire."

He put his hands up, "Okay. Okay. Wow. I didn't know this struck such a cord with you."

"Hey, a bajillion women worldwide can't all be wrong," I stated. His eyes were wide as he grudgingly conceded. "Sorry, I must sound demented, huh?"

He shrugged. "Only a little bit," he teased. "So what's so great about this vampire guy? Why are you and so many women so in love with him? Seriously, I want to know. I mean, yeah he loves her, but the guy also wants to kill her."

"Not really anymore…Just read the book, Edward," I ordered. "You'll see, and if you don't, I'll try to explain it." We left the book conversation at that. To be continued.

After we finished eating, we opened our fortune cookies. We added _in bed_ to the end of each of our fortunes and got a good laugh out of it. I let Edward eat my fortune cookie. I don't really like them. I only opened them for the fortunes.

Edward gave me a t-shirt to sleep in. He had shorts, but they were too big for me so I had to settle for a Beatles tee, which didn't bother me one bit. I showered and threw it on. It came down past my mid-thigh almost to my knees so it covered me just fine. It smelled really good too, like fabric softener. As refreshingly good as that smell was, I couldn't help but fantasize about how wonderful it would be to be enveloped in Edward's scent. He always smelled so good, very inviting. And then my thoughts went to his sexy crooked smile and his even sexier bed head hair, but I had to push these images out of my head. We were only friends, after all, I thought glumly.

As much as I'd wanted to come to terms with never being with Edward, there would always be a small part of me that longed for more than friendship. But it had been so fun spending time with him lately, I definitely didn't want to ruin it. I'd just allow myself the occasional fantasy though. And I'd had some doozies these past four years. No one needed to know, right?

I was reminded of the one where I was wearing his shirt, much like I was now, but instead of the mountain fresh scent in the fabric, his natural musk was infused throughout the material. I had put it on after we had finished having some hot sex, and the sight of me wearing his shirt turned him on so much that he'd ravished me all over again. Woo, I was getting warm just thinking about it. _Calm yourself down, Bella._ I started to actually fan myself with my hands.

I walked out to the living room where Edward was reading again. I stood there watching him a moment until he felt my presence in the room. I smiled a little as he looked up at me. "How is it?"

He looked perplexed and swallowed hard as he asked, "Huh?"

"The book. How is it?"

"Oh, the book. Yeah, it's…um, sexy."

I was taken aback. "I don't remember any really sexy parts in the first one. Maybe a little bit of sexual tension, but not much. There were definitely sexier parts in the third and fourth books." I gave him a look of surprise as I went to sit down next to him. I grabbed the book from Edward to look at where he was in it, brushing his hand in the process. Again, I felt a zap as we touched. I wondered if it was just me. _Shake it off, Bella!_ I looked at the page he was reading. "The prom scene? You skipped ahead to the end!" He shrugged and smiled sheepishly. What a cheater! "You're unbelievable."

"What can I say? I had to know how it ended," he was unapologetic as he attempted to defend his actions. "Don't worry. I'll actually go back and read the parts I skipped. But I'll tell you now, I don't have a good feeling about that Native American kid. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I know I don't like him."

I just laughed as I handed the book back to Edward. "Just wait until book two. You'll go mad!" He gave me an inquisitive look, but I wouldn't go into detail. "Nope. I'm going to bed. Good night, Edward. And thanks again for letting me stay tonight. I owe you one."

"Not a problem," he responded as we both got up and started walking down the hall. In classic Bella Swan form, I tripped over air and felt and heard my big toe jam then crack when it made contact again with the hard wood floor as I caught myself against the wall. (**Haha. Did you think Edward was going to catch her? That is **_**so**_** played**).

"Ouch! Damn!" I swore as I hopped around on my good foot, the left one, while grabbing my right one, which, in and of itself was potentially dangerous. I was placing myself in even more peril for further injury.

"Oh my god! Are you okay, Bella?" Edward asked as he tried to steady me.

"I stubbed my toe," I couldn't help but pout a little.

"Wow. You stubbed your toe on air." He had amusement in his tone.

"No," I said indignantly. "I _tripped_ on air. I stubbed my toe on your floor," I clarified.

"Mmhmm. Let me see." And before I even knew what was happening, Edward swooped me up and carried me into the spare room since it was right there. He set me on the bed gently and stretched my leg out in front of me so he could get a closer look. He touched my foot gingerly as he examined it. "Yep, that's going to leave a mark. And you're going to lose that nail too." I made a face. _Fuck! _"Can you wiggle your big toe?" He kept looking from between my big toe and my face. "Go ahead and wiggle your toe, Bella," he urged.

"Uh, I _am_ trying to wiggle the captain," I said through clenched teeth. It wasn't moving.

"_Captain_?" he asked.

"You know, the big toe is the captain of the toes? Seinfeld?" I clarified as I grimaced.

"Ahh. Right. Well, I'm only a first year med student, mind you, but in my unprofessional opinion, I'd say you broke the captain."

"Fabulous!" _Only the smooth and nimble Bella could pull this off._ I shook my head at my own dumb luck and uber-clumsiness.

Edward got me some ice for the toe and a few pillows so I could keep my stupid foot elevated. Unfortunately, there was not a whole lot you can do for a broken toe. Or so I thought.

I took some Tylenol and tried to get some sleep despite the throbbing in my foot.

Then early the next morning Edward drove us both to Forks since I needed to go back to see Charlie and bring some of my belongings back to Seattle. He was sweet enough to have washed my clothes the night before since I didn't have anything clean to change into, and he had made breakfast which he served me in bed since he didn't want me to walk any more than I needed to. I couldn't believe how thoughtful Edward was being.

We stopped by the hospital first. Edward called and gave Carlisle the heads up. My foot was x-rayed, and sure enough the captain was fractured. And then, to literally add insult to injury, Carlisle made me wear a stupid air cast slash boot on my foot so the stupid bone would heal in the correct position.

I gave him a look as if to say _You cannot be serious!_ Carlisle gave me a stern look in return. He knew about my stubborn streak."Stay off of it as much as possible, Bella," Carlisle instructed. He looked at his son who was still highly amused by my freakish injury, "Take care of her, and make sure she doesn't overdo things, Edward." I also was handed a pair of crutches. _Sweet! Yeah, not so much._ I grudgingly took them with a heavy sigh.

Edward nodded solemnly, but I could tell he was enjoying this. His green eyes were jubilant. "Bella, you're in good hands with me," he reassured me to which I smiled lamely.

It seemed I just couldn't stop humiliating myself in front of Edward Cullen.

**A/N (shakes head) I can sympathize. Well, I've never actually broken my captain, I trip on nothing all the time though. BTW Does anyone know of straight guys who've read Twilight? I know of only one.**


	5. Reciprocity?

**A/N Still don't own Twilight. Only borrowing the characters for this silly story.**

**Wow, a lot of you know some straight guys who have read and love Twilight. My buddy CJ is one of them. Kudos to the guys who actually give the book a chance. And Boo to those who won't read it but still make fun of it (my man included).**

**So, I wanted to crank this one out and post it as a thank you to everyone who's reading and reviewing and putting this story on alert and stuff. See, I told you reviews get me going!**

**Phantom wanted a little EPoV action so I will give her what she craves since she has been reading my stuff from the beginning—I'm talking about Saving Me here. Thanks, phantom. Please keep in mind, though, that this story is rated T. Not sure how lemony I can get without having to change the rating. Maybe if it gets too smutty to post later, I'll just pm those parts to you or something, girl. Haha. Did anyone else think O Captain! My Captain! referred to, uh, something else other than the big toe?**

**And thanks to everyone who is so kind enough to read and review. Love to read your favorite parts of the chapters. Oh, EmeraldSeaFrost put me in a C2. Thanks!**

**Anyhoo, here's the latest installment…you know the drill: read, enjoy, review.**

Can't Let Go Chp 5

EPoV

I was reading the vampire book as Bella was showering. Clarification, I was trying to read the vampire book in a vain attempt to keep my mind from wandering to thoughts of Bella, and more specifically, the happenings in my bathroom. Nope. Couldn't go there. Wouldn't go there. _Rebuild the friendship then proceed with caution. Rebuild. Rebuild. Rebuild._

My luck had been incredible as of late. Bella moving in across the hall, knowing I'd be spending a lot of time with her in the near future on the Mars and Venus column, and now she'd be spending the night here, albeit in the spare room, but still.

The rebuilding part is going very well, I thought. Hanging out with her today had been more fun than when we were in high school, before things turned weird even. We always had a good time talking, but it was different now because now I have to keep in mind that I was talking to someone that, I was told, was in love with me. And now I thought I may have started to fall in love with Bella too. I was definitely seeing her in a different light than I did four years ago. How could I _not_ want to spend more time with her?

At the same time, I understood that she had her guard up now due to my rejection, and I felt terrible about that. While I would love nothing more than to take her in my arms and tell her that my feelings for her have changed, that I wanted more than just friendship, I had to remember what Coley said. I had to take this slowly if I didn't want to completely freak Bella out. Bella didn't want to lose the friendship, and neither did I for that matter. I had to prove to Bella that our strong friendship would be the foundation for a solid relationship. I would not mess this up.

I thought reading the vampire book was helping me gain the insight I needed into parts of the female mind that were mysteries to me before. For instance, the main character was constantly questioning herself why vampire boy could be so taken with her. Bella said that every woman could identify with the main character so it would follow that my Bella didn't see herself clearly either. _My Bella_. That sounded right to say. I smiled as I repeated it in my mind.

I heard the shower shut off and it brought my thoughts back to the book. Hmm, I wondered if vampire boy turned her like she wanted him to. I flipped toward the end of the book, skimming the pages. Okay, they went to prom. The shady Native American kid was there crashing it…Yada, yada, yada. Oh, he might just do it…vampire boy was leaning in towards her neck and…no dice. What a disappointment. I was about toss the book back onto the coffee table when I felt someone watching me. I looked up and completely lost my senses for a good three seconds.

There in front of me was Bella clad in only my Beatles t-shirt, no bra, smiling wryly at me. I swallowed hard. In those three little seconds visions flashed through my mind of a scenario I wanted to actually happen but knew better than to attempt. I tried to stifle the urge to pin her against the wall and kiss her, to taste her lips, her tongue, and her soft skin including the areas annoyingly covered by the shirt. _Alright, get a grip, Edward_. Crap. S asked me something. _How is it? Is that what she just asked me? How's what? The vision in front of me? Beautiful, tempting, sexy. Very sexy._

"Huh?"

"The book. How is it?"

"Oh, the book." _Book? What book?_ _Quick, say something. _"Yeah, it's…um, sexy." _What the hell was that? The book is sexy? Oh, man, she's going to think I was a perve now or an idiot at best._

Bella looked surprised. "I don't remember any really sexy parts in the first one. Maybe a little bit of sexual tension, but not much. There were definitely sexier parts in the third and fourth books." Good she didn't catch that.

Bella came over and sat next to me, grabbing the book. Her hand lightly brushed mine as we made contact for the third time today. Wow. I couldn't believe I'd been keeping track of how many times Bella and I had touched. The first time was when I touched her shoulder in the hall, then she slipped her arm through mine when we went off to dinner, and just now as she plucked the book right out of my hands. I felt a tingling sensation each time we made contact. I wondered if it was just me. _Shake it off, Edward_!

"The prom scene? You skipped ahead to the end!" Bella was berating me. I merely shrugged and smiled sheepishly. "You're unbelievable."

"What can I say? I had to know how it ended," I was unapologetic. "Don't worry. I'll actually go back and read the parts I skipped. But I'll tell you now, I don't have a good feeling about that Native American kid. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I know I don't like him."

Bella trilled what sounded like a knowing laugh as she handed the book back to me. "Just wait until book two. You'll go mad!" I gave her a look willing her to explain that comment, but she wouldn't go into detail. "Nope. I'm going to bed. Good night, Edward. And thanks again for letting me stay tonight. I owe you one."

"Not a problem," I assured her as we both got up and started walking down the hall. And that's when it happened. As much as Bella had changed for the better, with this confidence she'd been exuding, which wasn't there in high school, she still was not the most graceful person in the world. Bella, like old times, tripped over nothing, as far as I could tell and I heard a cracking sound as her foot hit the hard wood floor. That was never a good sound. Bella did manage to keep from falling by placing her hand against the wall. Actually, it was pretty impressive for Bella to do that so quickly. I would have loved to have grabbed her and held her upright after she tripped, but it all happened so fast, and I was obviously not as quick as vampire boy.

She stubbed her toe and was hopping around on one foot. I didn't want Bella to injure herself further so I picked her up bridal style and carried her into the spare bedroom. I placed her as gently as I could on the bed so I could keep her covered and also not jar the foot anymore. My main objective was to make sure she was all right, but if I was being honest, the feel of her body against mine as I carried her the short distance to the bed was unbelievable. I wouldn't mind doing that again, as long as it was under better circumstances, of course.

I felt more tingling as I gently took hold of her leg in order to stretch it out so I could take a look at the toe. I asked her to wiggle her toe and tried not to laugh as she assured me she was trying to wiggle the captain. I wasn't laughing at her injury as much as I was seriously amused by her facial expressions. She pouted about stubbing the toe, grimaced through clenched teeth at the pain, and then she just looked pissed, angry that she injured herself in the manner that she did, tripping over air. Anyway, there was zero movement from the captain. It was very pink and was swelling up already. Bella made a face when I told her I suspected a break.

I got her some ice and bolstered her right foot with some pillows to keep it elevated. After taking some Tylenol, Bella was able to get some sleep. I stayed in the living room a while to read some more. I still needed to go over the parts I skipped earlier. I also did some laundry. I wanted to wash Bella's outfit from the day since she didn't have a change of clothes for tomorrow.

I took her clothes out of the dryer around midnight and had placed them folded on the trunk at the foot of the bed in the spare room. I watched Bella for a moment as she slept. She looked like an angel, so peaceful. You couldn't tell that she may have just broken her captain and was in pain. Hopefully the Tylenol was doing the job. I fought the urge to stroke her cheek and settled on pulling the afghan higher so she would stay warm. I took the ice pack off her toe for the third time. I had been icing it for ten minutes at a time. The swelling had gone down already.

I turned to go back to the kitchen when I heard Bella murmur, "Edward," as she tossed a little on the bed. I thought she had awoken and was about to answer her, but Bella was clearly still asleep. I smiled. I didn't know she talked in her sleep. I was about to leave when she spoke again. It stopped me dead in my tracks. "Edward," she whispered. Her voice sounded so sad and tortured, it nearly broke my heart, "Why don't you love me?"

I turned around slowly to glance at Bella. Yes, she was still asleep. I walked over to look at her more closely. She had a tear streaming down her cheek. She was actually crying in her sleep. About me? Because she doesn't think I loved her? The heaviness I felt in my heart caused me to fall to my knees to a kneeling position on the floor. I was next to Bella, peering at her. This time I didn't think twice about touching her as I wiped her lone tear away delicately with my thumb, careful not to wake her.

"I do love you, Bella," I whispered. It was the truth. I did love her. We were on the path to becoming best friends again, and now I wanted even more. Before I could stop myself, I leaned in and placed a kiss softly on her cheek. I kneeled there for a while longer just watching Bella. I was willing her to wake up, to see me there next to her, to hear what I just said, but Bella merely sighed and then rolled over to face the other direction. I sighed as well before standing back up. I stole one more look at my sleeping angel and went to bed myself.

I went to bed, but I didn't go to sleep. Not right away anyways, but somehow I got some shuteye after staying up thinking about Bella. More specifically, I was thinking about what I was going to do regarding Bella. I knew I couldn't tell her what I heard her say in her sleep. She'd probably die of embarrassment. And I couldn't just come out and tell her I loved her. She'd obviously convinced herself that I didn't love her so there's no telling how she'd react. Would she let her guard down or build it up more? No, I supposed I'd just stick with the plan to stay friends, really, really, really good friends. I would show her in subtle ways how much I cared for her. If she seemed comfortable with that then maybe I could show more overt affection. Even though I'd like nothing more than to shower her with my love, I needed to take my cues from Bella.

The next morning I got up and made eggs and bacon. I took it to Bella on a tray along with some toast and orange juice. She was awake but still in bed when I entered.

"Good morning, Bella. How's the captain doing?" I asked as I placed the tray in front of her.

"Aww, Edward. Thanks, but you didn't have to do this. I can hop out to the kitchen."

"It was no trouble. Don't worry about it. How's the captain?"

We both stared at her toe and watched it not move. I think Bella was trying to wiggle it though.

"Stupid captain," she griped.

I shook my head in sympathy. "So I was thinking we should go to Forks this morning. I called Carlisle. He's at the hospital already. He can look at the captain and then we can pick up some of your things from Charlie's house. And didn't you say something before about cooking for Charlie for the week too?"

She stared at me for a moment, stunned. "Uh, yeah, but you don't have to take me, I can dri…" I gave her a dubious look and then looked at her right foot, "Well, I guess I can't drive. You don't mind?" Bella asked, biting her bottom lip and wrinkling her nose a little.

It made me smile. I shook my head. "I don't mind. Besides, Hal will probably appreciate me keeping you out of his hair today. Finish eating and then we can go. Oh, I washed your clothes from yesterday so you'd have something clean to put on today," I told her as I gestured at the trunk.

Bella smiled, "Thanks, Edward. That was really thoughtful."

I smiled back, my eyes bored into hers, "You're welcome, Bella."

I kept her company while she ate and then gave her some privacy as she changed.

The drive to Forks was quiet. We talked a little more about the book. I complained about not getting the fight scene that I was anticipating at the end. Bella pointed out that there was a fight scene, it was just that the main character was unconscious for it. Oh well, at least I knew there'd a fight scene in the movie. I'd seen the trailers for it. It actually looked pretty good.

We went to see Carlisle and he confirmed my suspicions about the fractured captain. Much to Bella's chagrin, she had to wear a boot and take the crutches that Carlisle handed her. I couldn't help but be amused by the situation. I felt bad that Bella broke her toe, but I would get to spend even more time with her now, even more than I thought I was going to.

We went to Charlie's and while he too felt sorry for Bella's injury, it didn't surprise him. Despite her father making fun of her a little, Bella decided to cook for Charlie anyway. I insisted on helping since she wasn't as mobile as she usually was. We made meatloaf since that was the easiest thing to make, freeze, and reheat. Bella stayed stationary at the kitchen table while I brought her the ingredients she needed. Bella assembled the meatloaf and I put it in the oven and brought it out when it was done. We ate a little for a late lunch with Charlie before heading back to Seattle.

"Oh my god! Bells!" Hal all but screamed when he noticed us coming down the hall. "First of all, what happened? Edward, I told you to keep her from peeking. You didn't have to maim her!" Hal was eyeing Bella's immobilized right foot as she hobbled over from the elevator on crutches with me in tow.

I laughed. "I didn't do that to her. Bella did that to herself."

Bella scowled at the both of us. "Hal, you jinxed me you know that? All that talk last night about me not being able to walk properly. I stubbed and broke my big toe thank you very much."

"The captain?" he asked in horror.

"Yes, the captain."

Hal looked at me as if to ask if Bella was serious. "I'm sorry, but is it a jinx if I'm speaking the truth?"

I opened my mouth to comment but the death glare Bella gave me conveyed _Don't even try it_!

"Well this should cheer you up. Come see your new place!" Hal ordered. "Edward, pick her up or something, she's moving too slow."

"Yes, sir," I happily obliged before Bella could protest. I swooped her up like I did last night and carried Bella into the apartment. As soon as we were inside, both of us dropped our jaws at the sight before us.

**BPoV**

"Whoa!" Edward and I both murmured.

"Close your mouths, you two, you're catching flies. So, what do you think?" Hal was grinning so big and apparently was very proud of his work I couldn't have lied even if I wanted to mess with him a little. No, it was perfect. Perfect for me anyways. I couldn't have pulled this off in my dreams.

"Hal, I don't know what to say," I was shaking my head in shock and awe. The apartment seriously looked like a professional decorated it, which in my case, Shane and Hal were as close to professional as I could get. Three of the walls were a buttery gold color with that metallic green paint as accent on one wall. "I love that green color, Hal." I smiled because it reminded me of Edward's eyes. Everything was neutral yet striking at the same time, rich golds, oranges, browns, and reds. There was a chocolate brown leather sofa with colorful accent pillows, the dining room table was directly behind the sofa. It was a dark wood and had glass vases on top. It looked like something out of a show on HGTV. I couldn't believe this was home. My home.

"Come here," Hal grabbed Edward's arm that was under my knees and pulled us into the bedroom. "Your boudoir, my lady."

Edward set me down on the sofa in my bedroom and sat down next to me. "Nice," he commented.

"Um. WOW!" was all I could manage to utter. It, too, was decorated to perfection with an East meets West feel to it. Hal went so far as to put fresh flowers on both the nightstands on either side of my queen sized bed. The headboard was a simple red fabric over some batting-covered plywood, but it was just right and it blended into the wall. I even had the little seating area. Why? I didn't know, but there was a seating area nonetheless. I guess so I could sit back and admire my bedroom like right now.

"Oh, come see the bathroom!" Hal snapped his fingers and Edward sprung into action scooping me up again. A girl could get used to this. And he pulled us down the hallway into the bathroom. It was mostly white. Very simple but functional and pretty. Again, before I could say anything he dragged us into the guest room slash office. It was painted a light lime green color giving it a modern feel to the otherwise retro vibe of the space. I had a daybed in there which could double as seating, of course, plus chairs that looked like they were taken out of a seventies TV show but somehow worked in the room anyway. I had storage and a simple desk for my laptop. "Talk, girl! I wanna know how you like it!" Hal demanded.

I simply turned to my friend, while still in Edward's arms mind you, and pulled him into a hug so Edward was pretty much hugging Hal too. If he was uncomfortable with the intimacy he didn't show it. He merely laughed as Hal kissed me on the cheek and then Edward on the forehead. "Hal, it's perfect! How will I every repay you for this?" I asked. I would forever be in his debt.

"Baby girl, no worries. We had this furniture just laying around going to waste. Shane helped me paint, but I went to town decorating. It's muted for my taste, but I knew you'd like it."

"This is muted, eh? I'm afraid of how ostentatious this place would look if I told you to go nuts," I laughed. "Wait, you just had this stuff laying around? What, do you own a furniture store I don't know about?"

"Of course not, but Shane's brother does. Why? Do you need something else?" My sarcasm was lost on him this time.

"No, Hal. I don't think I need anything else. Thank you."

"Alright then. I better head back upstairs. While I did this today, Shane was busy doing our place so I can't wait to see what he did. Call me if you need anything." Hal kissed me again and left.

Edward and I stared after him and then I realized Edward was still holding me. I was feeling very at home here, but I was sure he must have been getting tired.

"Edward," I said. His eyes were dazzling as he looked down at me. Our faces were inches apart. "You can put me down. Your arms must be tired, though I could really get used to this," I laughed. It was the truth. I loved being this close to Edward, and I longed to be even closer.

"My arms aren't tired," he whispered and looked at me in a way that if I had been standing, my knees would have given out from under me. It almost felt like he was holding me a little tighter to him, like he didn't want to let me down, but I must have been imagining things.

It had been like this all day. There were occasions where I swore Edward was trying to convey something to me through his eyes, like at his apartment this morning and at the hospital when he told me I was in good hands. There were moments when we were cooking together at Charlie's house as well. I thought I was just reading what I wanted into things.

Like last night. I had this dream where I was back in high school and was crying because Edward didn't return my feelings for him. I'd had this dream many times over the past few years, but this time I got the nerve to ask the Edward in my dream why he didn't love me. The crazy thing was, the Edward in my dream told me that he _did_ love me and kissed my cheek. It felt so real.

And then when I woke up, this Edward had made me breakfast and laundered my clothes. He was doing the sweet things the Edward of my dreams would do, weakening my resolve to keep quiet about how I felt, especially since I thought I was feeling some reciprocity. But again, perhaps I was only imagining the reciprocity. I'd have to gather more clues as to whether Edward felt any way for me that I felt for him. At the very least, we were back to being close friends again. I didn't want to mess that up.

"Alright, Hulk, but maybe you should put me down anyway," I suggested.

"Why?" Edward asked, and I swore his face moved a fraction of an inch closer to mine. I felt his breath on my lips. He still had that look in his eyes. Were they smoldering?

"Um," I swallowed. He was still staring intently in my eyes. "I have to pee," I breathed.

A smile pulled at his lips as he carried me to the bathroom and set me down so I could hobble in.

Once safely in the bathroom I splashed cold water on my face. _Get yourself together, Bella._ I even slapped my face a little to wake myself up. Was this happening? Or was I misreading his cues again? Okay, I had to keep gathering data that was all. I had to be sure I wasn't reading more into his actions than platonic friendship. I suddenly eyed a bud vase containing a couple Gerber daisies. I took one out and started plucking the petals, _He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me…_I continued to pluck away until all the petals were gone.

Smiling, I left the bathroom and hopped out to the living room only to find that Edward was gone. My face fell and I sighed. I plopped down on my sofa and stared at the ceiling to clear the thoughts, all thoughts, from my evidently overactive mind.

I was almost asleep when I heard my door open and felt someone hovering above me. I allowed one eye to flutter open and I smiled at what I saw.

"Do you sleep with one eye open often?" Edward asked grinning crookedly at me.

"I guess I have to. People are sneaking in and out of my apartment," I responded returning his smile.

"I brought in your luggage. Shall I put them in your bedroom?"

I sat up. "Oh, yeah. Thanks." I would have followed him, but Edward was back in a flash and sat down next to me.

"This place looks incredible, Bella."

"Yeah, I worked really hard on it," I joked. Edward laughed. "Well, I worked really hard to not peek or get in the way." Edward nodded. I sighed. "I have such great friends," I said. "I'm really lucky. And thanks so much, Edward, for today, this morning, last night, for everything. The list goes on and on." I reached for his hand and squeezed it. To my surprise and delight, as I was releasing my hand, Edward squeezed it back.

**A/N BTW pictures of Bella's apartment are on my profile page. Thanks for reading! The movie review chapter is coming up!**


	6. Love Jones

**A/N You know good and well I don't own Twilight.**

**Happy Twilight the movie premier week, everybody! Woot! Show of hands, who's going to the midnight show? Who's going at a more civilized hour? My hand went up for both questions. I'm going with my sis and girlfriend, both as hard core as I, and then later with a friend who actually prefers sleep to seeing Rob Pattinson until 2 in the morning on the big screen. Yeah, I don't know where her priorities are either.**

**Note, the name of this chapter is from the 1997 movie, Love Jones, but you know to jones means to have a very strong craving or need for something.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 6 BPoV**

I didn't imagine it. Edward squeezed my hand. In fact, he repositioned his hand so that as I was releasing my hand from atop his, he grabbed mine to keep our palms connected. For three and a half seconds (I literally counted in my head _one banana, two banana, three banana, four buh_) our hands, palm to palm, stayed stationary since I was meeting his resistance in letting go. But we finally did let go, slowly, both allowing our fingers to linger, touching for another good three seconds. I stared at our hands and then at Edward. We both had the same small smile on our faces, like we knew, acknowledged, and appreciated the intimacy of that gesture, however, neither of us articulated it.

And so began our little game. I didn't know what else to call it. We went about our business acting like we normally did, as friends, but then occasionally one of us would push the friendship boundary ever so slightly, perhaps to see what we could get away with; perhaps it was to gage the other's reaction; perhaps it was both. I didn't know, but it was interesting to say the least, but also frustrating because I really had no idea what Edward was thinking. I didn't think he'd go to all this trouble just to tease me or mess with my head, but it was like he was returning my feelings, but he wasn't saying anything. And because he wasn't saying anything, I didn't want to say anything. Yeah, how old were we?

For all practical purposes, I was still gathering data; I wanted a clearer picture of where I stood in his eyes. Now, I had a very good idea after the weekend, but something held me back from verbally conceding. Straight and plain, it was fear that was holding me back. Again, having already humiliated myself four years ago, I felt, this time, the ball was in his court.

We sat there in silence for what seemed to be forever. My mind wandered to places I had been attempting to prohibit it going for the past few years, but it would go there nonetheless. A vision flashed in my mind's eye of Edward turning to me on this extraordinarily comfortable leather sofa, not saying a word while pressing his lips against mine. The kiss starting out softly, lovingly, but then quickly escalated to more passionate and lustful as his hands slipped under my blouse caressing the skin from my navel up to my breasts and then massaging them while trailing kisses along the path his hands had just taken…

"Belllllaaaa?" a voice was interrupting my little fantasy. I would have been annoyed if the voice hadn't been coming from my personal walking, talking fantasy himself.

I blinked hard a couple of times. "Um, what was that?" He had been talking about something, I was sure of that much.

"I'll go grab the leftovers from last night and we could eat here and then we could…Are you okay? You look a little flushed." Edward looked concerned.

_Um, I should look flushed, I was just fantasizing about you_. "No, I'm fine. The captain is throbbing a little," I lied.

"Oh, I'll get some more Tylenol too then. I'll be right back. Do you have a movie preference?"

"Movie?" I asked.

"Yeah, I thought we could watch a movie and do a mock review for it?"

_Oh! _"Oh, sure, but really, Edward, you don't have to spend all your free time with me you know."

His face fell a little, "Oh, do you want me to go?"

"No," I said quickly. "No, I love that you're here. It's just, I don't want to keep you from anything. I know you must have a ton of homework or something more fun to do than hang out with your clumsy old friend."

"As it happens," he informed my brightly, "I have some reading to do, but it can wait until tomorrow. And I'd love nothing more than to hang out with you." Damn! His eyes were doing that smoldering thing again. I wondered if he knew he was doing it. I didn't know how to respond yet so I did the only think I could manage at that moment.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Why do you assume _your clumsy old friend_ referred to me?" I joked.

He smiled that crooked grin at me. "I'm sorry, were you referring to someone else?"

"No, but still." Edward merely chuckled and shook his head.

He got up to go gather the dinner and movie from his apartment, but before leaving he drew a line in the sand in our unspoken little game. Edward placed one hand on my cheek as he was still chuckling and said, "You're priceless, Bella." And he definitely let his hand stay there longer than was necessary, not that I minded.

So we spent that Saturday evening watching a movie at my place and eating our Chinese food leftovers.

I was sure it didn't go unnoticed to Edward that we sat a little closer together than platonic friends should. At least I was absolutely and painfully aware of our proximity. We sat Indian style on the floor using the coffee table as a dinner table, our backs leaned up against the sofa, knees touching.

We watched _When Harry Met Sally_ as we ate. Good thing I'd seen that movie about a thousand times, because I was finding it hard to concentrate at the time. We were busy continuing our little game. Occasionally, one of us would pilfer a bite from the other's dinner, and our arms would _accidentally _touch.

I redrew that line in the sand as I blocked his chopsticks with mine as he went for another bite of my Princess Chicken. Edward gave me a frustrated look but soon softened his expression into a smile as I fed him a bite of it myself. "Thanks," he said.

"You're welcome," I responded nonchalantly.

Edward then felt the need to return the favor as I went to steal a bite of his food.

"Thanks," I told him as I licked some of the sauce from the corner of my mouth. I couldn't be sure, but he may have fed me sloppily on purpose because Edward then took a napkin and softly wiped the corner of my mouth with it. We both smiled at the act. "Thanks again."

"My pleasure," was his response.

We then tried to turn our attention to the movie. It worked for a little while. We were even laughing at the appropriate places. But all the while, I was hyper aware of Edward next to me along with this intangible connection we had going.

As the movie wore on, I ended up leaning against him. My head was up against the top of his arm. He let it rest there a while, a good half hour, before he casually wrapped his arm around my shoulder so that then I was leaning against his chest with the back of my head in the space between his shoulder and his chin. I was practically in his lap! Edward actually rested his cheek on the top of my head. My heart was going like a jackhammer, and I had these butterflies slam-dancing in my stomach.

I was not aware of anything else. Harry and Sally were not even in my thoughts. All that ran through my mind was _Edward is touching me, Edward is touching me_. Over and over and over. My mind was practically screaming it. I was surprised Edward didn't hear it himself. Yep, I wanted him badly.

As the credits finally rolled, I came back to my senses. I yawned and stretched, my arm grazing his chest as I did so.

"Well, what's the verdict?" I asked Edward as I carefully got up off the floor and sat myself on the sofa.

"Two thumbs up. Humor, frustration, romance, a good time had by all?" I didn't miss the double meaning there.

"That's a pretty lame review," I commented smirking. "I hope you can come up with something a little better for the vampire flick."

"Oh, I think I'll come up with something," Edward responded.

It was close to midnight so he was heading back to his place. I had to walk Edward to the door in order to lock it after he left.

He turned to look at me as he was about to walk through the door. "Well, tonight was…fun," he said.

I nodded. "Yes it was. Thanks for coming over to play, Edward," I said as I reached my arms around his waist for a hug.

Edward returned my hug, rubbing small circles on my back. "Anytime, Bella," he said as he kissed the top of my head. "Anytime." He finally turned to leave. "If you need anything just holler or text."

"Will do," I said closing the door behind him and locking the deadbolt after.

I leaned my forehead against the door and sighed. That was definitely an interesting night.

I didn't see Edward much the next few days. He had to catch up on schoolwork, plus I decided I should try tackling a LaLo letter or two. Edward did take me grocery shopping on Sunday morning since I had nothing in my pretty and trendy but otherwise bare kitchen. And then I spent the rest of Sunday putting away my clothes and other things I brought from Charlie's house.

Hal would pop in every so often to see how I still liked the apartment. Correction, he wanted to make sure I was loving the apartment and singing his praises, which I did on both accounts.

"This is such a nice space, Bella. Who does your decorating?" he'd ask smugly.

After about three times of telling him a genius did, I grew tired of stroking his already enormous ego so the fourth time he asked me on Sunday I told him, "A compliment whore did."

Hal just laughed, "I am a whore aren't I?"

On Monday Edward's central air was being fixed while he was in class. I let the repairman in since I'd be working from home for a little while. I should mention that Edward and I exchanged apartment keys, you know, for emergency purposes only. Anyway, I left my door open so I could see his door from my position on the sofa. I was intentionally procrastinating on answering a LaLo letter about whether or not to date someone at work as I was on the phone with Coley.

I had recounted the events of the past week to her. She didn't tell me to confess anything to Edward this time. She said she'd learned her lesson, but things sounded promising she thought. "Does a late night booty-call qualify as an emergency?" she asked me.

"_Coley_!" I reprimanded.

"Bells, don't be such a prude. I was kidding anyway. Sort of. Maybe. No, really, I think it does qualify." We both laughed. "Hey did you open the email from Hal?"

"No," I answered. I hadn't had a chance to check my email in a while and I did so then while talking to Coley. "I'm opening it now." I clicked on the email forward and my jaw dropped, "Whoa!"

Coley was laughing on the other end. "That was my reaction exactly," she chuckled. "Yummy, eh?"

Hal had forwarded us pictures of Dolce and Gabbana's new male model. He was on the runway modeling pants. At least that's what I thought he was modeling. I didn't know. I didn't care. He didn't have a shirt on. He looked pretty good! "Yeah, I'll say!"

Our conversation kept cutting out from an incoming call on Coley's end. "Oh, man, Bella, I have to go. My florist is calling me. Alice and I came up with an extravagant list of flowers for my bouquet, and I'll bet she's calling to tell me she doesn't have half of what I want," she complained with a sigh. "I'll talk to you later. Good luck with the Edward situation. Keep me posted."

"Thanks, I will. Bye, Cole." I hung up and looked at Hal's email again, scrolling up and down. I had to smile. Hal was hilarious.

"What's that Cheshire cat smile about?" I heard Edward's smooth voice from the hall. He was at my doorway peeking in.

"Nothing. Hal's just sending me and Coley soft core porn that's all," I giggled.

He gave me a look of repulsion. "Do I even want to know?" he asked.

"Probably not," I laughed. "How was class?"

"Same old blood and guts," he shrugged. "Fantastic."

I rolled my eyes. "To each his own," I muttered.

"So why is your door open?" Edward asked as he came in to sit next to me. I still had my laptop open to the pictures of the model, and Edward spied it. He rolled his eyes. "So is that guy considered hot or something?"

"Your air conditioner is getting fixed. I wanted to keep an eye on the repairman. You don't think this guy is hot?" I asked. Edward looked at me like I was crazy. "Oh, come on Edward. It wouldn't mean you're gay if you appreciated another guy's looks you know. I acknowledge beautiful women all the time, I'll have you know."

He raised an eyebrow. "Really? Like who?"

I shrugged, "Like whoever. Heidi Klum. Halle Berry. They're hot."

"Now you saying that they're hot is hot," he grinned.

I just shook my head. "Whatever, Edward."

He took a closer look at Dolce and Gabbana man. "He's _okay_," Edward said grudgingly. "He's not ugly. He seems fit."

I laughed. "A straight man calls this model _okay_ and _fit_, Hal and Coley and I would agree that he's smoking hot."

"You think this guy is _smoking hot_?" Edward looked skeptical.

I shrugged. "To each his own." Edward pursed his lips to one side and scrunched his eyebrows together like he was thinking hard about something. "What's the matter, Edward? You're smoking hot too."

His expression lifted considerably. "Am I?"

I rolled my eyes. "Like you didn't know that."

He had that crooked grin on his face again. "Who's hotter? Me or Dolce and Gabbana boy?"

I sighed. I could have gone ahead and told him the truth, that he was hotter, but my patience was running thin with these compliment whores. "I'd have to compare the pecs and the abs in order to make a final decision on that."

To my utter astonishment, Edward began to lift the hem of his shirt. I got a glimpse of some flesh but he dropped the hem as we heard Emmett's booming voice from down the hall calling Edward's name.

"Maybe later then?" he smirked. I honestly couldn't tell if he was joking or not. Gah, he was so frustrating sometimes. "In here, Emmett!" Edward called to his brother but his eyes remained on my, once again, flushed face.

"What are you doing over here? Hey, nice place. Who lives here?" Emmett finally noticed me. "Hey, Bella! Aww, this is your place? This is pretty sweet. I heard Big Gay Hal hooked you up."

If my mouth hadn't already been agape from the near strip tease I was about to receive from Edward, I would have looked just as flabbergasted by the _Big Gay Hal_ comment. Emmett noticed my shocked expression. "What?"

"Emmett, it is _not_ okay to call him that!"

"What Big Gay Hal?" He asked me like I may have gotten that distasteful comment confused with another that he may have just said. Well, just give Emmett a few more minutes and he was bound to say something else just as offensive.

"Stop that!"

Emmett waved me off. "Oh, he's fine with it. He actually told me that I'm the only one who can do that."

I looked at Edward. He only shook his head at his brother. "Well, this isn't Southpark. It may not offend Hal, but don't call him that around me please."

"Or else what, Bella. You'll stub your toe on me?" he snickered.

Edward was still shaking his head in shame of his brother. "Or you'll get a boot to the groin. How about that?"

"Whoa, okay. Simmer down, Bella. No need to threaten the boys. I'll cut it out. You ready, Ed?"

I just laughed. Edward hated being called Ed or Eddie. Edward scowled at his brother. "You know how I feel about that, _Emmy._"

Emmett made a face. "Alright. Point taken. You ready to play ball, little bro?"

"Just give me five minutes. Are you going to wait at my place or stay here and harass Bella some more?" Edward asked grinning at me.

"Do you even have to ask?" Emmett responded. Yeah, I knew the answer as well. Emmett's favorite past time was giving me a hard time. I kind of liked it only in as much as it was very big brotherly of Emmett to do so.

With that Edward popped back to his place to change. They were going to meet Jasper and some other guys to play a pick up game of basketball.

"So you really tripped on nothing?" Emmett asked me.

"Yes, Emmett," I answered in an exasperated tone.

"That's too bad. Broken sergeant, huh?"

"What? No, broken _captain_," I corrected him.

"Oh yeah, captain. So what's the recovery time for it? Or is it him? Whatever."

I made a face. "Your dad says six to eight weeks," I said glumly.

"Oh, man. That's too bad. You have to stay off your feet as much as possible?" I nodded. Then he grinned wickedly, "But at least it'll be six to eight weeks before your next major injury, right?" He laughed at his own dumb joke.

"Yeah, thanks, _Emmy_." That shut him up. I laughed at his frown. "Hey, Emmett, can I ask you something?"

He shrugged, "Go for it."

"Okay, what do you think about dating someone you work with?" I decided to get a guy's opinion on the question for LaLo. I was decidedly against it. "Is an office romance a good idea?"

Emmett gave me a very confused look. "Are you dating someone at the paper?"

I shook my head, "No. I just want to know what you think about it." Emmett looked at me skeptically. I put my hands up, "It's not me, Emmett. Just answer the question."

Emmett seemed satisfied that it wasn't about me. He came over to sit down next to me. He was stroking his chin as he thought about his answer. "As a general rule I wouldn't be dipping the pen in the company ink, but upon further review, I'd have to say that it depends on the two people. If they are mature enough to handle themselves at work and keep their private life separate then I'd say go for it."

I was surprised by his answer. "Really? You don't think it'd be awkward if and when they broke up?"

"Well, that's why you have to lay the groundwork. Hopefully both parties can keep the two relationships separate. If not, if one seems…unbalanced or needy, then steer clear of the psycho."

I thought a moment. "Okay, so basically use common sense. Thanks, Emmett," I said sarcastically.

"No problem. Good luck with your office romance, Bella," he laughed.

I just rolled my eyes. We chatted a little more about Charlie before Edward got back and they left shortly after that. I spent the rest of the evening on formulating LaLo's response to the office romance dilemma. I supposed the answer to most of LaLo's questions would probably be to use common sense. How many different ways could I write that?

**EPoV**

"You told her it was okay to date someone at work?" I asked my idiot of a brother. I was incredulous.

We had finished playing basketball and he was dropping me back off when he told me what Bella asked him.

"I told her it depended on the people and to use common sense," he clarified.

This was just too weird. Bella never said anything about any guy at the paper. And why would she ask Emmett of all people for love advice?

"She told me it wasn't her, and I believe her. Bella's a terrible liar. You know that."

This was true. Maybe it really wasn't about her after all. I hoped it wasn't about her. At this point, I was pretty sure we both knew where we stood with each other. I mean, the sexual tension between us was unreal. This _thing _happening in our relationship had to stop. I am not referring to the things that we were doing to test the limits of the friendship, which drove me crazy, in a good way. No, I wanted that shameless flirting to continue. What had to stop was us not talking about it. It was like the proverbial pink elephant in the room that was being ignored.

With each _accidental_ brush of the hand or _platonic _touch that lasted longer than it should, I was being driven to the brink of insanity. What I wanted to do was grab her face and press my eager lips to her very kissable ones every time we got close. I'd lost count of how many times she'd been close enough to do so.

Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to ask Bella about any of that office romance stuff, nor were we able to continue our little game. I was expecting some payback after what I did, or almost did Monday. I really would have taken my shirt off for her, but Emmett interrupted. I smiled at the memory of catching Bella so off guard. She was beet red from me grabbing my shirt and almost disrobing right in front of her.

When I told her _later_, I really meant it. I had no question in my mind that we'd be together, but this whole taking it slow thing was getting annoying. I had to remember that all good things come to those who waited. But that was why I started testing the friendship boundaries to begin with. I wanted to see if Bella would catch on and then reciprocate the flirtation. I was pleasantly surprised.

Tuesday and Wednesday I was slammed with classes and homework. Bella seemed to be pretty busy writing as well. I didn't get to see her or really talk to her until the car ride to the movie screening. Even then, Bella was just going on and on about how excited she was to finally see the movie. She was like a kid on Christmas Day. She was absolutely glowing with anticipation. I hoped that the movie wouldn't let her down too much.

There was still sexual tension as we sat next to each other at the screening, but for the most part, I was able to focus on the movie since I had to decide whether to recommend it or not. I glanced at Bella a couple times during the film, and she was completely engrossed. I could already tell she was going to give this movie a stellar review.

On the car ride home, she brought her little digital recorder out to tape our conversation. Bella started the discussion. "Well, I loved it. Everything about it. What about you, Edward? Hey, you got the fight scene you'd been waiting for. How exciting for you. Would you recommend this to other straight men?"

"Yes, I would because of the fight scene and the special effects over all."

Bella smiled, "Anything else you want to add?"

"Yeah, it's a good date film without being all sickly sweet and annoying. There's plenty of action for those who dig it, and also there is a lot of relationship stuff for those craving the romance portion."

"So, that's a go from Mars and very enthusiastic go from Venus," I restated. Bella nodded in agreement.

"_But_, is it Emmett-worthy?" she asked.

I laughed at the new standard of measurement that Bella just made up. "I think so."

As we were heading home, we continued talking about the film and the column. "This is fun, Bella. Going to a movie, saying what you thought, and then getting paid for it. It should almost be illegal. Good thing it's not."

"Um, _get paid?_ We never discussed wages, Edward," she joked. "I thought you were doing this for the company anyway." We continued the discussion in her apartment. While in the theater we had picked up where we left off in our little game. I was really into the movie, but I also remembered there was a lot of knee touching and arms grazing each others'. Bella even leaned her head on my shoulder for some of the mushier parts. I had to admit, I loved having her head there on my shoulder. It just felt right.

I laughed, "I guess I can do this pro bono as long as it's with you, Bella." There I said it. She smiled at me. Bella had the most beautiful smile.

"Thanks, Edward. I'm glad you wanted to do this with me. It's more fun watching and discussing it with a friend than reviewing all alone." There was that word, _friend_. I was going to set the record straight soon. "Plus, it's good to get a guy's perspective on things."

"Oh, that reminds me, Bella. Emmett says you asked him about whether carrying on a romantic relationship with someone at work is advisable?"

"Yeah?" she answered warily. Then she laughed a little when saw my apparent distress about it. "It's not me, Edward. I was just doing a little research is all."

I smiled and sighed in relief. "Oh, good. I wouldn't want to have to beat anyone up yet."

"Why would you need to beat anyone up at all?" She sounded a little perplexed.

"Come on, Bella," I whispered. I was looking so earnestly into her brown eyes, I almost drowned in them. I gently stroked her cheek with the back of my pointer finger. I noticed her swallow kind of hard. _Take it slow, Edward. Take it slow…_ But this came out before I could stop it. "You know I love you, right?"

**A/N Enjoy the movie everyone!!! I'll update again next week. Maybe sooner depending on responses to this chappie.**


	7. Wicked Games

**A/N I don't own Twilight, I'm merely borrowing the characters from Ms. Meyer.**

**Okay, let's face it, the movie wasn't epic by any stretch of the imagination and it isn't going to win any Oscars by a long shot. Considering the tight budget (Twilight cost $36M compare to the first Harry Potter which had a budget of $125M) and target demographic, I'd say it was just fine. I'll see it again, and I'll even buy it when it comes out on DVD just to pause it on the eye candy. You can't go into the movie thinking it'll be better than the book—impossible! That being said, Rob Pattinson brought the hotness so I thoroughly enjoyed watching him. I know that Bella and Edward (in this story) really liked the vampire flick. So, let's suspend our disbelief and assume that in the magical land that is FanFic and specifically Can't Let Go, the vampire flick was extremely kick-ass for the newspaper column's sake, okay? Thanks.**

**Okay, that's out of the way. Thanks for all the positive responses from the Love Jones chappie. I didn't think it was that great when I wrote it. I was incredibly tired and groggy and even dozed off at the keyboard, but I persevered and cranked it out to post it for you guys. See how much I love my readers? Anyhoo, I'm glad you guys liked it so much. Sorry to leave you with what was apparently a cliffie. Hope you enjoy this chapter as much. Please keep reviewing. I love reading your responses. They make me smile and get me going to write some more. I, too, am a compliment whore, but hey, who isn't right?**

**Oh, I posted a couple links to Nicholas, the Dolce & Gabbana model/soft porn mentioned in the last chapter at the bottom of my profile page. Check him out! (trills R's)**

**Wow, sorry for the long A/N. Here's the next installment. You know the protocol: read, enjoy, and review.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 7 BPoV**

So, I was officially experiencing a break from reality. I looked around the living room of my apartment. Surely, I was asleep and dreaming. But it all seemed so real. I went to the movie. Edward was with me. In fact, he drove. Yes, I remembered rambling on and on about how psyched I was for the movie.

While I was completely riveted to the big screen, I was also acutely aware that Edward and I were still playing our little game. We fought for the armrest. He'd gently nudge my arm then I'd nudge back. We finally settled on sharing the tiny median between us, the backs of our forearms in constant contact sending shivers down my spine despite Edward's body heat.

As the movie progressed to more romantic scenes, I automatically leaned my head on Edward's shoulder. I reveled in the feel of his regular and consistent breathing and heartbeat. My own heartbeat was correlated to my proximity to Edward. The closer we were, the faster the rhythm, practically palpitations. The further apart we were, the slower the beat. So now I had a theory: It was beneficial to maintain healthy heart rate, such as the kind with close proximity to Edward, so therefore, it was healthy to be around him. I swore the National Dairy Council should have endorsed Edward Cullen since, like milk, he did a body good. At least my body.

So, as I looked around my apartment, I thought hard. I probably looked like I was scowling because I was squinting so hard. Did I hear Edward say what I thought he just said?

"Bella?" he asked softly. His finger was still touching my cheek, but when I started moving my head as I looked around the room, Edward's finger grazed not only my cheek but also my jaw line and lips. Oh how his finger tickled my bottom lip, driving me insane, without even realizing he did it.

Finally, Edward captured my face between his hands and looked deep into my eyes again. I was still darting my eyes around the room. "Bella, please, your silence is excruciating. Say something," Edward begged.

I swallowed. "Did we go see the vampire movie tonight?" Edward nodded and said _yes._

"Do I actually live in this beautiful apartment?" I asked incredulously. Edward nodded and said _yes_ again. I was sure he was wondering where I was going with this interrogation.

"Am I…" I hesitated. "Am I asleep?"

"No, Bella, you are very awake right now." His eyes were sparkling with amusement.

I was still skeptical. "Pinch me."

Edward was trying to fight back a laugh. He snorted instead, "Bella, I'm not going to pinch you. You're awake. Why do you think you're asleep?"

I ignored his question for the moment. "Do you mind repeating what you just said? I'm not sure I heard you right." Edward nodded and also chuckled this time.

He stared into my eyes again, unblinkingly, and maintained his soft yet firm pressure on either side of my face. "You know I love you, right?" Edward didn't whisper; his voice was solid and unwavering. He sounded…absolute.

"That's what I thought you said," I paused and nodded slowly. Edward was still staring intently at me. I finally smiled a little. "I'm not asleep," I whispered, mostly to myself. I returned his attentive gaze as I reached one hand to stroke his perfect face, first his cheek, tracing down his jaw line and then softly over his lips where my fingertips rested. "You know I love you too, right?" Edward kissed the very tip of my middle finger and then blessed me with his trademark smile. There went the palpitations again.

I was immediately engulfed in a tight bear hug reminiscent of Emmett. I laughed as Edward spun me around one time then put me back down gently. He stepped back ever so slightly so he was able to look at me again. Still sporting the crooked grin, he sighed once, sounding like he was relieved. "Finally, Bella…Can I try something?"

I gave him a questioning look but shrugged my consent nonetheless. The slam-dancing butterflies were back in my stomach when I realized Edward was slowly leaning his face in towards mine. I closed my eyes as his lips brushed against my own. We kissed once, twice, three times. I felt his hot tongue on my lips on the fourth kiss, which was when I grabbed either side of Edward's face to hold closer to mine as the kiss grew more intense. My knees actually went weak and gave out so I allowed gravity to pull my body down. Luckily, I sank onto the sofa where Edward nearly fell right on top of me. He caught himself with his arms on either side of me but his face was still close enough to kiss.

"Mmmmm," he murmured into my neck. "Do you know how long I've been wanting to do that?"

I smiled wistfully, "I'd wager that it wasn't nearly as long as I've wanted it."

**EPoV**

As soon as Bella mentioned that, I wanted to kick myself. What a stupid thing for me to say. I was an idiot.

I lifted my head up to look at her. "Bella, I…I'm sorry. That was really dumb of me to say. I should have thought before…"

"Shhhh," she pressed her fingers against my lips to hush me. She wore a small, rueful smile on her own lips. "It's fine, Edward," Bella whispered. I smiled back and kissed her fingertips as we sat upright again on the sofa, facing each other. "So…" Bella's lips were pursed as she peered at me through her eyelashes.

"So," I mimicked. I captured her hands in mine rubbing circles in her palms with my thumbs. What I wouldn't give to know what was going through her mind. "Hey, why'd you think you were asleep?"

She shook her head and tried to look away from me, but I kept her gaze on me by placing my index finger under her chin. I smiled at her as she blushed. Now I was very curious. "Bella?"

"Oh, it's stupid. It's just that I've been…dreaming that you'd tell me that so I just thought I was asleep." She shrugged.

"And what made you realize you were awake?" I was now caressing her cheek with my index finger again.

She bit back some laughter. "Well, the way you said it. The Edward in my dreams is a little smoother I guess. All romantic and stuff."

I had to laugh as well, "Sorry I didn't meet your expectations. I can be romantic if you'd like. How does dream Edward say it to you?"

Bella shook her head, "No, it's fine. This was right for us I think. I have to stop living in a fantasy world anyway. Well, I guess I don't need to now." She moved in closer to kiss me.

It was difficult to articulate how Bella's lips felt moving against mine, perhaps soft was the best way to describe the feel. Soft like brushed cotton. And her tongue tasted…sweet and familiar. Home. That's what Bella reminded me of. It was like being at home when I was with her. What was more right than being at home?

Bella finally broke the kiss to come up for some much needed air. I leaned my forehead against hers. "So is that how Dream Edward kisses you?"

Bella chuckled and then sighed heavily, "Nope. You're way better than Dream Edward. You're real." Bella then started tracing her fingers over my chest and shoulders. I had to smile at what she said as well as at what she was doing. I was better than Dream Edward. Yes! "Great, now you're all smug."

I laughed, "I can't help it. You just told me that I'm better than the Edward in your dreams. What if I told you that you're better than Dream Bella?"

She rolled her eyes. "_Dream Bella_? Does she even exist?"

"Well, more like Fantasy Bella," I corrected. "And yes, she does exist. Up here," I tapped my temple. "And now she's sitting right in front of me." I touched my finger to the tip of her nose. "You are the woman in my fantasies, Bella."

"Aww, Edward, that's so…cheesy! I love it." We both laughed at my cheesiness. Bella wrapped her arms around my neck. "So, where do we go from here?"

A very good question. Now that we'd made our confessions, what do we do? "Well, I can only speak for myself," Bella broke from the hug to look at me, "I want to spend as much time as possible with you. Eating, sleeping, talking, and what not." She nodded with each item on my little list, but raised her eyebrow at the last one.

"What does _what not_ consist of exactly?"

"I'm just going to leave it open to interpretation," I grinned wickedly.

"Does _what not_ include the things you did to drive me crazy this past week?" Bella asked.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Bella," I joked. She rolled her eyes. "As I recall, Ms. Swan, you did much to drive me crazy as well." I smiled as I recalled her lingering touches, feeding me Chinese food, and leaning her head against my shoulder. "But to answer your question, maybe," I answered cryptically. "Maybe more." I looked at her closely to gage her reaction. "How does more sound?"

"More sounds good…_eventually_?" she added at the end along with a wry smile.

I nodded. "We'll take _more _slowly, okay?" Though I'd love _more_ now, I'd wait as long as I needed to for _more_ with Bella.

Bella yawned and nodded, "Okay." It was getting late. "Time for bed I think," she said. I nodded and leaned in for a kiss.

"Good night, Bella," I whispered into her ear. I got up and started toward the door.

Bella grabbed my hand, "Well, you're coming right back aren't you?" I looked at her curiously. "I mean, you're just going to change real quick for bed, right, and you'll be right back?"

_Yes! _I smiled, "Of course. I'll be here as long as you want me here, Bella."

She sighed, "Good. So I'll see you in a few then."

So I popped back over to my place to change into basketball shorts and a t-shirt. I brushed my teeth and kept my toothbrush to take over to Bella's. Her door was unlocked for me but I made sure to lock it once I got inside.

Bella had just finished washing her face and brushing her teeth as well when I got back and met her in her hallway. "You look great," I commented. She had on her Arizona State University boxers and tank top. One side of her tank top was riding up slightly revealing her slender waist and smooth skin to me. I resisted the urge to kiss that small spot of flesh right then and there.

"Thanks," she said as she reached her arms out to hug me. I did one better as I scooped her up, like I did the night she broke her captain, and carried her to the bedroom. Yes, this was what I was thinking about when I fantasized about carrying her bridal style again under better circumstances than a broken toe. I loved having her so close to me. I was pretty sure Bella enjoyed it too, as she leaned in to me eliminating any space between us.

Bella laughed as I set her down gently on the sofa in her bedroom. "This is a nice change from my usual bedtime routine."

"Oh, what's your routine consist of usually?" I asked.

"Well, I change into my pajamas, brush my teeth and wash my face like I did tonight, but, obviously, I don't get valet service to my room, especially by such a handsome man."

"_Handsome_? I thought I was _smoking hot_," I teased.

"Oh, sorry. I lost my head for a moment, Mr. Compliment Whore. I swear, between you and Hal," she shook her head scowling playfully.

I laughed. "Hey, the most beautiful creature on the planet said I'm smoking hot. It's a high compliment I'm not soon going to forget."

"Now you're telling stories," she rolled her eyes. "Just don't let it go to your head, Cullen," she ordered.

I shook my head, "Never. But you _are_ the most beautiful creature on the planet, Bella." I brought her palm up to my lips to kiss.

"Thank you, Edward," she said reciprocating the act and kissing my palm as well. "So, I hope you don't mind, but the rest of my routine consists of listening to music until I fall asleep." She leaned forward to grab her iPod, which was sitting on the little coffee table in front of us. She scrolled down to her _bedtime mix_. I extended my hand out for the iPod. I wanted to check out the list. It was comprised of Dave Matthews Band, Blue October, Jimmy Eat World, One Republic, and some Air Supply and Journey thrown in for good measure along with REO Speedwagon and Boston.

"Nice little mellow play list here, Bella. Do you ever make it through the entire list?"

She shook her head. "No, I usually don't even get to Journey."

I flipped her iPod over to read the inscription on the back. _If music be the food of love, play on_. "Nice. _Twelfth Night_? You can tell a lot about someone by the inscription on their iPod don't you think?"

She smiled, "Very good on the _Twelfth Night _identification, Edward. Um, I guess in my case you can. I am a Shakespeare junkie. What's your iPod say on the back?"

I smiled back, "_In case of emergency, hit play_."

She laughed. "Yes, you do love your music." She took the iPod from me and placed it on the dock. Dave Matthews Band's _Crash_ was first on the list.

She came back to sit by me on the sofa. "Good song," I commented before kissing her lips and pulling her to me.

We stayed on the sofa for a little while listening to a few more songs. It was nice, more than nice, to just sit there quietly holding Bella.

After the third song Bella decided to get up and pull me up with her. "Edward, we have this tremendously comfortable bed. Why aren't we in it?"

"Good question," I said as I scooped her up again and carried her to the bed and set her down.

"What's with the electric blanket, Bella?" I asked as I spied the heat- controlling device for her blanket.

"Oh, I hate to be cold," she shrugged. "You know that." I did. I remembered she hated cold and wet. Forks was a very difficult place for her to live for a while.

"Well, I don't think you'll need it anymore," I informed her as I smirked. There's no way I'd allow Bella to be cold when I was in bed with her. I'd be shirking my responsibilities as a boyfriend. Hmm, I guess that's what I just became. I was now Bella's boyfriend. I liked the sound of that.

"I don't know. My feet are always cold at bedtime. I don't know why, but consider yourself warned."

"Bring it, Bella," I challenged as I folded her electric blanket up and placed it on the sofa and replaced it with a comforter she handed me from her closet.

We both climbed into bed. Bella immediately scooted over to me, but we were sharing the middle of the bed. As Bella curled up next to me, she slid her feet under my knees. She wasn't lying. Her feet were freezing cold. "Geez, Bella, did you soak them in a bucket of ice water while I was gone? Or are you a vampire as well?"

She jutted her bottom lip out into the most adorable pout I'd ever seen. She then narrowed her eyes, "I warned you, Edward." And then to my dismay, she took her feet away from under my knees and scooted away from me. "I'll just be over here with my cold feet then," she said glumly curling into a ball on the right side of the bed.

"No, Bella, come back," I laughed as I reached for her waist and pulled her back to me. "I love your arctic cold feet against me," I teased. "Seriously though, do you have circulation problems?"

"Are you done teasing me yet, Edward?" she asked tilting her head and looking so very tempting.

"Do you mean for tonight or ever?"

"For tonight at the very least."

I shook my head, "Not even close. You're really cute when you get irritated, you know that?" I kissed her forehead.

"Well then, you can either quit the teasing now or suffer the consequences," she warned. Her tone was a little menacing, which piqued my curiosity.

"And what, pray tell, would the consequences be?" I said in a mocking tone sure to egg her on. She really was cute when she got mad. I didn't plan on making her mad often, but this was mildly amusing. I didn't think she would punch me for teasing her. But if she were to, I didn't think it would hurt too badly.

I was not prepared for what Bella did to me. I was expecting a smack to the arm or a kick to the shins. No, she never did what I expected her to. Bella assaulted my mouth with hers, kissing me more passionately than we had earlier tonight, while simultaneously cupping me. Yes, that's right. Bella Swan grabbed the boys and massaged them while our tongues wrestled and teased each other's. And then, she just stopped. Just as I was getting excited for _more_, she stopped. Bella let go of the boys, broke the kiss, turned her body away from me so her back was to me, grabbed one of my arms to wrap around her waist, and said, "I thought that would shut you up. Good night, Edward. I love you." There was a hint of a smile in her voice too. Wicked, wicked woman. I was in shock, but I learned then not to mess with Bella Swan anymore. "Payback's a bitch, isn't it?"

I sighed heavily, "Yes, it certainly is. Good night, Bella. I love you too," I said as I kissed the back of her head. And that was the first of many nights together. Despite the payback, I was still in heaven. I was with Bella, my Bella. I was home.

**A/N There you go. No cliffie. Just fluff. Hope you liked it!**


	8. Who's Your Daddy?

**A/N Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I am a mere scrub borrowing her characters for a short while.**

**I have to say, Twilight the movie is for sure better the second time around! I liked it the first time, but I was really able to enjoy it this time. It didn't seem as rushed. Also, I had consumed far less caffeine this 2nd time around since I went at a more civilized hour than the midnight show.**

**Anyhoo, moving on, lots of you liked the stuff and fluff from last chapter, particularly the payback from Bella. I have debriefed Bella on the reviews from the last chapter and have passed on the props and applause that were given her for that wicked stunt in bed. Hehe.**

**Oh, thanks to Lorrie Lynn for putting this story on her C2 (As Human As You and Me). That's two C2's for this story (Woohoo).**

**Okay, if you know my writing, you know I love me some acronyms so, here's chapter 8 for you to REAR: Read. Enjoy. And Review.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 8**

**BPoV**

I woke up after midnight and felt Edward's arm still wrapped around me. A small smile played at the corners of my mouth as I placed my own arm over his and squeezed. Instinctively, Edward pulled me tighter to him. I smiled even bigger and sighed. I could feel his breath on the back of my head. I actually timed my own breathing with the rise and fall of his chest as I thought _It happened. All of it_. _Edward told me he lovds me_. _Edward Cullen loved me back!!!_

How quickly and seamlessly it all occurred. Like it was meant to. Edward was meant to be here next me all along. His being here was right. It just took the formality of the confessions to get here I guess.

I suddenly felt too keyed up to try to go back to sleep. I didn't want to wake Edward so I very carefully lifted his arm off of me and slowly rolled out of bed. Edward stirred a little but otherwise remained asleep. I took a second to marvel at the angel in my bed. Even unconscious, Edward looked amazing. I leaned down to give him a quick kiss on his forehead and padded out of my bedroom.

I went to get some water from the kitchen when I spied my cell phone on the counter. It was on silent and I had missed a few text messages. They were from Alice, Coley, and Hal. I laughed as I read each one.

**Alice: OMG, how was the movie? Was R-Pat so hot?**

**Coley: So jealous u got 2 c it 2nite. Let me know how it was. PS what's up w/ Mr. X? R u in his bed yet? LOL.**

**Hal: How yummy was Cedric Diggory? Need 2 know! Also, don't u think he looks a bit like ur Mr. X? Hmmm…**

I decided to mass text all of them back: **R-Pat is leave-your-husband hot. Movie was great. Can't wait 2 c it again. BTW, Mr. X and I r in love. (sigh) ttyl. Xoxo**

I then made my way to my office and started to work on the Mars and Venus review. I figured if I could knock it out now and email it to Gerald, he could look it over and email it back for revision before I went to Forks for Charlie's next radiation treatment.

I was tapping away on my laptop when I heard a tap on the doorframe. I looked up and smiled to see Edward leaning against the doorjamb.

"Do you usually work at two in the morning?" he asked walking in to sit next to me on the day bed.

I shrugged. "I couldn't get back to sleep so I decided to get rolling on Mars and Venus. I'm transcribing our banter that I recorded. It's kind of funny. I think Gerald's going to like this format."

Edward looked over what I had written so far and it seemed to meet his approval. We were laughing over something in our recorded conversation when my phone beeped with an incoming text. I cringed. If any of my friends were up this late, it couldn't be for anything good and then to text me back? I was more than a little apprehensive about the message.

"Are you going to check that?" Edward asked.

I made a face, "Eh, it's probably Coley or Hal harassing me about the movie. It can wait." And then my phone sounded with another text. And then another. Edward quirked up an eyebrow and I grudgingly checked the phone. All three messages were from Hal, of course. I could almost hear his high-pitched, excited tone getting progressively more frustrated and angry through the texts:

**Message 1: **_**WHAT?????**_

**Message 2: Hello! I said **_**WHAT????!!!**_

**Message 3: Fine. Don't answer, but don't think ur off the hook, missy! Details. Manana. Conference call with the girls. Kapeesh? PS Rob-Pat DOES look like ur Ed. (Swoon!)**

I shook my head in response, but I couldn't help to smile a little. Hal had a point.

"What?" Edward asked. He, too, was smiling. I continued to shake my head. "What is it?" Edward started to tickle my sides to get it out of me. I tried to tickle him back, but I failed miserably. He was too quick and too strong. It wasn't fair.

I laughed; I couldn't help it. "Nothing. It's just Hal being dumb," I continued laughing. "Cut it out, Edward!"

Thankfully, he stopped with the tickling and held me to his chest instead chuckling a little, "Sorry, the tickling was payback for that little stunt you pulled earlier. I could have reciprocated the torture; you know, an eye for an eye, but decided that it would be equally torturous for me if I started something knowing I had to stop." He gave me a pointed look like I should have felt repentant or something.

I blew him a raspberry instead. "Sell it somewhere else, Cullen, I'm not buying. I don't feel bad for what I did earlier. You had that coming and you know it."

Edward chuckled again. "I had to give it a shot. You're tough as nails, Bella. So how is Hal being dumb?"

"Just asking about the lead actor in the movie, and he made the observation that Rob Pattinson looks a lot like you." I showed Edward Hal's text. "He's right you know. You both are, as I stated to Alice, Hal and Coley, _leave-your-husband hot_."

Edward just gave me a weird look and then frowned a little. "Hal called me Ed." I rolled my eyes. "Hey, who's Mr. X? Is that me?"

"Maybe," I shrugged and pursed my lips to one side. I really didn't want to get into the history of the moniker. Edward opened his mouth but then closed it again upon reading my expression. Whatever he wanted to say, he decided to not push the Mr. X thing any further.

"So how much more are you going to write tonight?" he asked instead.

"Um, I'm not sure. Maybe a little more. I'm almost done, and I'd like to email this to Gerald ASAP. But please, don't stay up because of me. In fact, you should go back to bed. You have class tomorrow. At least I can sleep in a bit."

"No, I'll stay up with you since you're almost done. I don't want to sleep without you anyway," he said stroking my cheek with the back of his hand.

I tilted my chin up for a kiss. "That's sweet, Edward. How about I finish typing in bed then?"

Edward then scooped me and my laptop up and carried us to bed again where I continued to write for a half hour before sending it to Gerald. I didn't know how I was able to concentrate on finishing the column, Edward was lying next to me playing footsy as I was trying to type. I turned to him a couple times to give him a warning look, but he merely smiled or winked and continued to distract me. He finally quit as I closed my computer and placed it on the nightstand.

"All done?" he asked as he pulled me down next to him. I was lying partially on top of him resting my head on his chest and draping my arm across his stomach. I sighed in content as we lay there quietly for a moment. "So, I'm _leave-your-husband hot_?" I could hear the smile in his voice.

"I knew you wouldn't just let that comment go. I swear I say too much in front of you, Edward," I said in mock exasperation.

He laughed, "On the contrary, you don't say enough, Bella. You're very difficult to figure out."

I raised my eyebrows even though he couldn't see. "Really? I always thought I was so easy to read. I wear my emotions on my sleeve."

"Well, your expressions are intriguing, but I can't always read them. They both amuse and frustrate me, but I can't get enough of them. I don't think I ever will."

"Hmm, you're very easily amused aren't you?" I teased.

"Just by you, love," he responded. My breath caught for only a split second, but Edward noticed. "What?"

"You just called me _love_."

"Yes? _And_?"

I lifted my head up to look at him thoughtfully. "_And_ nothing. I like it," I said as I repositioned myself so my head was next to his. We were both on our sides facing each other. I could barely see his face from the dim light of my alarm clock but I could feel him. Even if his hand weren't resting on my hip, I would still be able to feel him there with me. The fact that he was touching me was icing on the cake. One of my hands was doing the same, resting on his hip. Our faces were slowly getting closer together and our bodies followed suit. I soon found myself molded to the contours of Edward's body.

"I'm glad you like the nickname. It actually just slipped out, but I like it too." He barely got the comment out before our mouths found each other's. The kiss quickly escalated from sweet to _I want you now (_well, that was how I'd classify it anyways) in a matter of seconds. My hand moved from his hip up to his head where my fingers wound themselves around his tousled locks. Edward's hand moved only slightly yet significantly from my hip to my bum where it was cupped nicely. I instinctively arched my back slightly, grinding my pelvis towards Edward's, and definitely feeling his arousal. His other hand miraculously appeared out of nowhere on my other hip making its way up and under my tank top settling on my breast.

My head was spinning now. _What should I do?_ We were supposed to be sleeping and now we were _more-ing_. Did I want this right now? Well, obviously I wanted this, but _should _we be doing this right now? Was it too soon for _more_? I mean, things were moving awfully fast. Not _awfully. Wonderfully fast_, but was it too fast?

Edward seemed to be sensing my inner turmoil, or perhaps he was fighting his own internal battle over _more_. He broke the kiss but left his hands where they were, which, I was completely fine with me.

"Bella," his voice was thick with lust, "Do you want this right now or do you want to wait?" His lips and tongue on my throat and jaw line didn't help me to think his question through at all. But I took a couple of deep breaths, which helped to clear my head a little.

"We should…wait." I said decidedly. I bit my lip and looked at him, "I'm sorry, Edward, I…"

He quickly swooped his lips in atop mine for a quick kiss. "Shh, it's fine, Bella. We can wait for _more_. There's no rush." He kissed me again and I sighed in relief.

"Thanks, Edward," I whispered. "I just wasn't a hundred percent sure yet," I said. We were facing each other again. I traced my finger along his jaw.

"Yeah, I could tell. It's okay. I want you to be sure." I kissed him again to thank him. "Just out of curiosity. How sure were you percentage-wise? I know you weren't one hundred percent."

I smiled. "Do you have a guess?"

"If I had to guess, I'd say ninety to ninety-five?" he ventured.

I laughed. "That's a pretty good guess. I was closer to ninety-seven, ninety-eight actually. We were only a heartbeat away from _more_. I'm so weak."

"No, I'd say you are very strong to be able to stop."

"You too, Edward. Thanks."

"No problem. Umm, do you want me to move my hands?" he asked. I forgot his hands were still cupped over my butt and my breast. We both laughed at our juxtaposition.

I shrugged. "I actually don't mind, but if you want to move them you certainly can."

"It's not that I don't like where they are, love," he said as he moved his hands. "But if I leave them where they are, I don't think I'll be getting any sleep tonight."

"Suit yourself," I said as I gave him another peck and then turned with my back facing Edward. I did grab one of his arms to wrap around my waist. That was how I fell asleep before. "I love you."

Edward squeezed me to him. "Love you too. Good night."

The next morning Edward got up around eight to get ready for class. He had two lectures to attend and then we were going back to Forks for Charlie's treatment.

It was amazing waking up next to Edward. Actually, I woke up to Edward trailing kisses along my neck, collarbone, and shoulder. Yes, I was a lucky lady. I got up with him. I showered and got ready for the day while he was doing the same over at his place. We had a bowl of cereal each before he headed out.

I had about five hours to work before Edward got back so I checked my email. I smiled as I read Gerald's response to Mars and Venus.

**Thanks, Swan. Love the witty banter. I'm running it as is. Good job, rookie. Don't forget about Lana. I need it by Saturday afternoon. I've enclosed a list of books to review in no particular order, but it's going to be another movie for next week. The Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon one about all the Christmases. Gerald. PS How's the toe?**

I typed back a quick response when my phone rang. True to his word, Hal had me on a conference call with Alice and Coley. They all got the text from the middle of the night and I told them all about our confessions and about Edward staying over and our close call with _more_.

"I can't believe you stopped! Are you crazy?" Hal shouted in reproach. I actually had to hold the phone away from my ear.

"Shut up, Hal. If she's not ready, she's not ready," Coley defended me. "Good for you, Bells."

"Yeah," Alice chimed in. "I just think it's great that you two are together finally."

I smiled. "Me too!" I giggled.

"Awww!" I heard from all three of them.

"Hey, Bella," Alice asked. "What are you doing right now? Do you want to go with me to pick up my new puppy?"

"Um, sure, but shouldn't Jasper do that with you?" I asked.

"He's already met her, I'm just picking her up. We're getting an Italian Greyhound puppy. She's so cute. Her name is Mina. Wanna come?"

"Sure," I said. I needed something to do since I didn't have to revise my column.

We all said goodbye and Alice came by and picked me up shortly after. We went to a home in the suburbs where a woman and her family actually breed Italian Greyhounds and Boston Terriers. I think you know where I'm going with this.

Damn Alice! Mina was adorable. Small, mostly fawn colored with a little white. She was so soft too. I'd always wanted a dog. All the Italian Greyhounds were spoken for, but the woman showed us the recent litter of Bostons, and oh my god, one little guy just jumped out at me. Long story short, I was now the proud owner of a Boston Terrier puppy. He was so cute. It was love at first sight.

Alice and I stopped by the pet store to buy accessories. I got Diddy, that's my puppy, a crate, a bed, and miscellaneous other items. We were heading back to my apartment when Alice asked, "Hey, Bella. Can you even keep a pet in your apartment?"

Oh yeah. I forgot. "Well, I'll just ask Hal. How can he turn down this sad face?" I asked as I held Diddy up to Alice. We both laughed. I was almost positive Hal wouldn't mind. Alice helped me with all of Diddy's things then I called Hal to come down. Better to do it face to face.

Hal came in and Alice showed him Mina. He was Oohing and ahing over her when he said, "Bella you should have gotten one too!"

Alice and I smiled at each other. "Really, Hal. You'd let me keep a dog here?" I asked.

"Only if it's cute," he clarified.

"Well, what do you think of this guy?" I asked him holding up Diddy.

"Oh my god, is he for me?" Hal asked all excited.

"Um, no, Hal, he's for me actually. His name is Diddy."

"I've always wanted a Boston Terrier. Can we share joint custody? I mean, he'd be mostly yours, but I'll help take care of him and play with him. Shane won't let me keep a dog upstairs. Oh, please, Bella?"

Hal had the most heart breaking expression I couldn't say no. Besides, it was nice to know I had a built in puppy sitter. "Wow. Hal, You've got Alice's begging expression down. Nicely done. Of course we can share joint custody!"

The rest of the day until Edward got back from class, Alice and Hal were over and we let the puppies play. We took them outside a few times but mostly stayed in the apartment. Alice and Hal left about a half hour before Edward got back.

He stopped in my apartment first. Diddy was asleep on his bed on the floor next to the TV so Edward hadn't notice him yet.

"Hey, beautiful," he greeted me in the kitchen. "How was your day?"

"Excellent. How were classes?" I grinned.

"Excellent." He looked at me curiously. "Something is different."

I laughed. "Yes. Edward, you may want to sit down for this news," I warned.

He merely put his hands palms up. "What is it, Bella?"

I beamed at him, "Congratulations. You're a dad!"

Edward stared at me in shock and confusion and swallowed hard. "Bella, I know I'm only a first year med student, but that's impossible. We didn't do anything last night, and even if we did, it's way too soon to tell if you're…"

I laughed, "Edward, I didn't say you're _going to be a dad_. I said you already _are a dad_."

He stared at me again. "Bella, and I mean this with the utmost love and respect, what the hell are you talking about?"

I took his hand and dragged Edward to the living room. I picked up the little black and white ball of fur from the oversized pillow next to my TV, waking the little guy up in the process.

"Meet your son, Diddy." I handed the puppy to him. Edward held Diddy up to look at him and then held him up by his face and neck where Diddy gave him some kisses.

Edward turned to me and laughed. "I'm a dad!"

**A/N Haha. Well, they're parents now. Let me know what you think! Oh, and, Phantom, I'm sorry for not delivering on the suggestive title of the chapter. Please forgive me.**


	9. More Issues with More

**A/N I am still just a mere scrub, and Steph Meyer is the goddess that created and owns all things Twilight.**

**Hey thanks again for all the reviews and story/author alerts. I am very appreciative that anyone is even reading this babble let alone enjoying it.**

**Sorry for the wait. I was stalling because of projects due, writers block and, of course, Phantom and I collaborated on a Christmas one shot, **_**Play It Again, Edward**_**. No, I am not above putting in another shameless plug for it.**

**We hope you like it. From the reviews, it seems that it's a hit. Hmm, perhaps it's the smut content…Anyhoo, it's rated M for language and a lemon, so consider yourself warned…Go to either my profile or phantom-writer3739's profile to read it. Or you can go to withthevampsofcourse and see the c2 to check out the other entries. um, prepare yourselves for a cold shower after reading those entries.**

**Here's the next chappie, and if I may steal Phantom's phrasing, get your REAR in gear. You know what I mean, and if you don't, go back and reread my A/N for Who's Your Daddy?**

**Can't Let Go Chp 9**

**BPoV**

Edward's face upon hearing that he was a dad was priceless. Shock, surprise, and disbelief all flashed before my eyes. Very amusing really. And then his expression when he realized he was a dad to Diddy was even better, hilarity and finally joy.

Diddy was seriously the cutest thing ever, though we found out early on he had some gastro-intestinal issues. Yeah, his gassiness could literally clear a room. We'd have to experiment with different kibble to see what agreed with him. That or lobotomize the part of our brains that processed smells. But it didn't seem feasible since everyone we knew would have to be lobotomized as well.

Despite being the stinkiest dog in the history of pet ownership, though I was not sure how official that title was, we loved him to pieces. How could we not? He was a soft, cuddly, ball of fur. His face looked like he ran into a wall, it was so flat. I supposed Diddy's was a face only a mother could love. He was so ugly he was cute, you know? Part Boston Terrier, part alien. He was adorable.

We had taken Diddy to Forks with us, Edward and I, and I almost gave Charlie a heart attack when I told him he was a grandfather. That was how I dropped the news too, "Charlie, you're a grand-dad now."

Charlie immediately jumped to the conclusion that I was pregnant as well. And it didn't escape Edward's attention that Charlie was giving him a death glare even if it was just for a half a second.

Charlie let out a sigh of relief when we showed him Diddy. He even bonded with his grand-dog for a bit while Edward and I cooked before taking Charlie to the hospital. Charlie had always wanted a dog. Though I always pictured Charlie with a basset hound lazily hanging out with him as he fished, he did take shine to Diddy.

"Were you trying to get me shot, Bella?" Edward asked me while in the kitchen. "I swear I saw Charlie look to his gun and then to me when you told him he was a grandfather," he said disapprovingly.

I laughed, "Eh, relax Edward, I don't think he would have shot to kill, and how convenient is it that we're going to the hospital anyway? The injuries you would have sustained wouldn't have been life-threatening for long," I assured him.

"Thanks," he responded sarcastically as I tilted my chin up for a quick kiss. "That's quite a consolation."

Esme thought it was hilarious that she was a grandma to a dog and cute that Edward and I were doggy parents together. She even puppy sat her grand-dog while we were at the hospital with Charlie. Esme was even more pleased to see that Edward and I were _together_, though it wasn't like we came out and announced it. I guess she inferred it from the vibe we gave off, I don't know. Esme was especially perceptive as it was. She merely gave me a knowing and very heartwarming smile. On the sly she informed me that she thought we should have gotten together sooner, like in high school or college. Yeah, she and I both, and apparently the entire Cullen family as well, save for Edward.

When we got back to Seattle we found Hal hovering around on our floor. He practically tackled me to get to Diddy. "Oh good, you're finally back!" he said as he snatched the puppy from my hands.

"It's nice to see you too, Hal," I responded sarcastically.

"Oh, sorry, baby girl," he kissed my cheek. "And hello, Edward. I was just anxious to see our little boy," he gushed.

Edward looked at me in surprise, "Oh yeah, Edward. Hal has joint custody. I forgot to tell you earlier."

"I see," Edward commented as we entered my apartment. We noticed Hal had a shopping bag with him. "What's in the bag, Hal?"

Hal smiled devilishly. "I couldn't resist."

"Uh-oh," I uttered ominously as I unstrapped the stupid boot from my right leg and freed the captain from immobilization. "What'd you do?"

Hal then presented us, well, Diddy, with several sweaters and shirts. "Alice and I went to a doggy boutique," he informed us proudly.

"Of course you did," I said rolling my eyes. "And did you find a kimono for Diddy?" I joked.

Hal grinned widely. "You didn't!" I admonished. Edward was smiling and shaking his head in disbelief again.

"Yes, I did, girl. And he's going to look _stunning_," Hal said in a high-pitched, sing-songy voice. "Let me show you what else I got—_Oh my god, what's that smell_?" Hal wrinkled his nose in disgust.

Edward and I laughed. "Our son," Edward informed him. "The stench is admittedly arresting, but you kind of get used to it."

I looked at Edward and made a face like he was crazy.

"Right. No. You actually don't get used to it."

"Dear god, crack a window!" Hal ordered us. "What'd you feed him, dead skunk?"

I continued to laugh as I started to get up from the sofa with the intention of opening the sliding glass door that went out to my modest little balcony, but Edward caught my eye and beat me to it. "Hal, what's this?" he asked. There was a wooden box, or I guess a planter, about three by five feet and a foot deep, containing sod.

"That's Diddy's potty, of course. You live on the fifth floor. He's got to have a way to relieve himself in a pinch, and I have graciously provided a small _yard_ for him to defile."

"Wow, thanks, Hal. You're really using your powers for good and not evil. I'm impressed."

"I'll ignore that bash and simply say you're welcome. Anything for our little Diddy." He put Diddy down in the grass and encouraged him to go potty. When Diddy did so, Hal praised him. Edward and I smiled. It was quite a scene to behold. Hal was so sweet.

We went to bed shortly after Hal left. He really wanted to take Diddy upstairs with him, but remembered Shane didn't want a dog, and also Diddy let another one rip. Hal sighed speaking to the puppy, "Listen, little nasty, I love you but you stink. I'll see you tomorrow though. Yes, I will. Yes, I will." Wow. He was speaking baby talk to Diddy.

When Edward and I went to bed, we originally had Diddy in bed with us. We ultimately ended up putting him in his crate in the living room, though, because one, he kept farting, and two, it felt kind of weird making out with Edward with a set of eyes staring at us, regardless if said eyes belonged to an adorable and harmless canine. We'd be kissing and then we'd sort of stop as we felt Diddy's gaze on us. We were looking at him looking at us. Yeah, it was more than just a little unsettling.

Early the next morning I was waiting impatiently for my paper to arrive so I could read Mars and Venus. Even though I knew what the column said, I still was a little jittery about my first published work in the Times. I fed Diddy and put him in his little yard while Edward was getting dressed in his apartment.

Diddy had just done his thing when I heard a thud against my door. I went to open it and found my paper rolled up and lying on my little welcome mat. I quickly removed the rubber band and unraveled the Times. I went straight to the _Go_ section, which contained the arts and entertainment articles. I scanned through the pages finally finding Mars and Venus on the fourth page:

_Mars and Venus on Movies and Books by Isabella Swan featuring Edward Cullen._

I smiled as I read both of our names, together, in print. Then I grinned even wider as I skimmed through our banter and eventual recommendation. At the very end, Gerald had put in an email address for readers to submit reviews for _us, _just to see if we should continue this format. I really hoped the readers liked it. But regardless if they did or not, I'd still have Edward accompany me to the movies anyways, as long as he wanted to go, that is.

"_Ahem!_" I heard someone clear his throat to get my attention. My head shot up to find Edward smiling crookedly at me. I didn't even hear his door open I was so engrossed in the article. His eyes were twinkling with amusement.

"Why are _you_ so jubilant?" I asked.

"Just seeing how happy and excited you are makes me happy as well. You didn't even notice me staring at you while you've been reading the paper. Your joyfulness is infectious, love." He walked over to envelope me in his arms. My back was to him as we were looking at the paper in my hands. Edward's chin was resting on my shoulder. "So, how's Mars and Venus?"

I was still smiling widely. "Is it really egotistical to love to see my name in print?"

Edward chuckled as he kissed my neck, "Nope, I think it's a natural feeling," he murmured as he nuzzled my jaw line. "Is it what you envisioned?"

I bit my bottom lip and nodded trying to stay focused, but it was difficult since Edward was holding me tightly and his breath was tickling my skin, giving me goose bumps. "_I_ think it's good. I just hope the rest of Seattle agrees." I giggled as I laterally flexed my neck the other direction due to the ticklishness and consequently exposed more skin for him to brush his lips against.

"Do you think people will actually review our review?" he asked as he tugged me back inside my apartment. I didn't think he really cared about the answer right then and there since he pinned me against the door once he closed it and crushed his lips to mine.

Edward had a way of making my whole body go limp. I was lost in the kiss, melting into it until the plopping sound of the newspaper hitting the floor brought me out of the momentary trance. The sound must have also scared poor Diddy causing him to bark, which in turn made me flinch slightly as well.

Edward groaned as I broke the kiss.

"I would love nothing more than to make out all day, Edward, but don't you have to go soon?" I asked. He brushed his lips against mine again and my knees nearly went weak; I was gripping onto his waist in order to stay upright. "Edward?" I murmured.

He sighed and answered reluctantly, "Yes, I'm attending another autopsy." He raised his eyebrows and asked brightly, "Want to come?"

I wrinkled my nose. "Why would you ask me that?"

Edward shrugged. "Just being polite."

I made a face. "Don't worry about etiquette on autopsy viewing. No offense, but my answer will always be a resounding _no_! Always." I shuddered at the thought of watching a dead body getting hacked up. _Yuck!_

"Suit yourself, love. I'll only be gone a couple hours. I'll bring back some lunch for us. What will you be doing?"

"Counting the seconds until you return," I replied sarcastically and laughed as he rolled his eyes at me. "You're going to want to eat after seeing a dead body?" I wrinkled my nose again.

Edward shrugged again like it was no big deal. He had intestines of steel. My stomach turned at the idea.

While Edward was gone I emailed Gerald the LaLo article for Sunday's paper and then played with Diddy for a while. I even put the boot back on my right foot and took the little guy on a short walk.

Edward returned a couple hours later like he said, bringing back sandwiches from the same deli we went to last week with Rose and Alice. He even remembered I had the chicken salad on wheat with a pickle on the side and a small bag of pretzels and brought those for me. How sweet was that?

As we were eating, we both received a text message from Alice ordering us to go to dinner at her house tonight at six, and we could bring Diddy to play with Mina.

Edward's phone dinged with another message. He checked it and I noticed him smirking the tiniest bit but tried to keep a straight face otherwise when he noticed me peering at him.

"Who's that?" I asked curiously.

"Alice. She says not to be late," he answered nonchalantly.

I was wary though. "Then what was that smirk about, Edward?" I believed him that the message was from Alice, but I was suspicious that there was more to it than a reminder to be on time.

"Nothing. She just typed the message in Pig Latin." He smirked again.

I made a face. "Why would she type in Pig Latin? Can I see?" I reached for his phone, but he swiftly swiped it up and just as swiftly showed me a message and then turned the phone away to read the message aloud.

"Ebay onnay imetay," he pretended to read. I knew he was pretending because the message he flashed was longer than that, but I nodded, feigning the appearance of pacification as we continued to eat. Something was up. I let it go for the time being.

That afternoon we both were lounging around my apartment doing our own work. Edward was reading for pathology or some such class and I was looking through emails to LaLo trying to pick a couple for my next assignment. I also checked the email address where readers could review Mars and Venus.

We had only gotten a handful of messages so far. I was rolling my eyes and snickering at some of them. Apparently his Mars perspective was a big hit. Well, perhaps not so much his perspective but he himself was a big hit. In fact, three of the five reviewers wanted to know if Edward were single. Edward looked up from his book giving me a curious glance to ask what was so funny.

"The chicks dig Mars. Quite a bit. You may get a date out of this, Edward. These ladies want you."

He rolled his eyes and closed his book as he moved, no, crawled, and very sexily I might add, toward my end of the sofa. We _were_ foot to foot, but now he was hovering above my laptop and me. I swallowed hard as we were staring at each other. Edward snapped my computer shut and set it gently on the coffee table all without breaking eye contact with me. He wasn't even interested in the messages.

I swallowed again. "Can I help you?" He nodded slowly, his green orbs boring into my brown ones. "Okay?" I prompted feebly.

"I'm only interested in one lady wanting me," he said softly. He bent his head down to kiss me but stopped just shy of my lips before adding, "Because I want her. Very much." His lips finally met mine in another one of those sweet turned I want more kisses. After a minute Edward pulled back a little and asked, "Percentage check?"

"Huh?" I was a little dizzy from the lack of oxygen.

"Percentage check," he repeated gently tugging on my earlobe with his teeth.

"Oh. Um…ninety-eight point five?"

He nodded. "Okay." Edward kissed me softly again and then rolled onto his side pulling me to face him as we lay on the sofa. "Love you."

I smiled, "I love you too." I would have apologized to Edward, but I knew he would tell me I didn't have to. He was being so sweet about the _more_ situation. I was getting closer to one hundred percent. Closer than Edward realized. Really I was probably ninety-nine point nine. I was afraid though. Not of Edward not loving me, but I was afraid of…not measuring up.

I so was not experienced in more. Aside from knowing the mechanics of more, I was never ever even close to getting there. The only guy I'd even made out with was this baseball player, Drew, who I went on a few dates with. He was really nice and very good-looking, but I never felt any sparks with him. Not like what I felt with Edward anyway, not even close. I sighed wishing I could get over the fear thing.

"What is it, love?" Edward asked. He could always sense when something wasn't right.

I shook my head, but he wouldn't let it go.

"What?" he prodded.

"Just thinking about _more_ and how I wish I weren't…afraid." I was staring at his perfect chin.

Of course he'd cup my chin with his hand to lift my gaze to his. "What are you afraid of? You don't think I'm pressuring you too much do you?"

"Oh, no. It's not that at all. Well, you tempt me, but I don't mind that. It's just…God, this is so humiliating." Edward kept urging me on with his eyes though. It was weird. It was like I couldn't even lie if I had wanted to. Somehow he was dazzling the stupid, embarrassing truth out of me. "I've never had _more_," I blurted and then immediately closed my eyes and buried my face in his chest.

I felt his chest shake with laughter. "Don't laugh at me!" I whined into his shirt.

"I'm not laughing at you, love." He tried to move his chest back to free my face so I'd look up at him. No dice. My eyes were still shut. "Bella, look at me." I clamped my eyes tighter. "Please?" I opened one eye. He chuckled again, this time at my expression. "That's not anything to be embarrassed or humiliated about. It's very noble really." I made a face. _Noble Schmoble. "_You want to wait," he assumed.

I shook my head. "No, I'd very much like to have _more_." Edward raised his eyebrows. "Well, obviously I do. My percentage keeps going up. It's just that I know you're more experienced in _more_, and I don't want to know the gory details of your _more_ escapades," I shuddered, waving my hands in front of me, but continued. "It's just that…" I was looking down again but he brought my eyes back to his and smiled encouragingly. "Well, I don't know any fancy tricks or anything," I finished defeated. I could feel how red my face was getting.

Amusement flickered in his eyes and the corners of his mouth twitched. "_Tricks?_ Like what?" he asked curiously.

I sighed, "Exactly. I don't know. I'm afraid I won't be able to…please you, okay?" He finally threw his head back in understanding. "Okay, I'm going to go hide under my bed now," I said as I tried to get up.

Edward chuckled as he pulled me tighter to him making it impossible to break away. "Bella, it's fine. When we finally have _more_, it'll be enough just to be with you. No fancy tricks needed. It'll be perfect because it'll be _us. Together_." I could hear the sincerity in his tone. "No worries, okay?" I nodded. "So whenever you're ready, you just say the word, and I promise to try to make _more _the best decision you'll ever make and hopefully the most special experience you'll ever have. I just hope _I_ can please _you_, Bella."

I snorted, "Yeah, I don't think that'll be a problem. All you need to do is look at me and I go to pieces. Factor in your voice and your touch and forget it. Do with me what you will, Edward."

His eyes narrowed and he shook his head, "Be careful what you wish for, Isabella," he warned. He had that look in his eyes again as he assaulted my mouth with another fervent kiss which lasted for approximately thirty seconds until Diddy started whimpering.

We broke from the kiss simultaneously and sighed looking at Diddy staring back at us, head tilted like he was wondering what was going on.

"I think he needs to potty," I said.

Edward nodded and got up to put Diddy in his little yard. I thought I heard Edward accuse Diddy of cock blocking.

I laughed to myself at the comment and noticed Edward's phone on the sofa. It must have fallen out of his pocket. I wasn't going to deliberately search for Alice's last message, but the iPhone dinged with an incoming message from Alice, which displayed on the screen. I gasped as I read it.

But then I froze when I heard Edward's voice behind me, "Bella?" Uh-oh. He caught me red-handed. "What are you doing?" I turned around slowly, biting my bottom lip. I tried to give him the most Alice Culleny heartbreaking expression I could. I hoped I wasn't in too much trouble. "_Great_. You know don't you?" He asked disapprovingly. I nodded infinitesimally. He sighed. "_Terrific_. Alice is going to kill me you know."

**A/N Hmmm…I wonder what's up =D**


	10. Check Baby Check Baby 1,2,3

**A/N Ub-scray ere-hay. O-nay own-nay Ilight-tway; Eph-stay Eyer-may oes-day.**

**Translation for those who do not speak Pig Latin: Scrub here. No own Twilight; Steph Meyer does.**

**Hmm, what if I did an entire chapter in Pig Latin? Um, nevermind. I just pictured my entire monitor covered in red and green squiggly lines from the office assistant in the word program and I just could go berserk from the sight.**

**So, I had to get **_**my**_** rear in gear and get this chapter out. Apparently the last one was a bit of a cliffie? Yeah, I got called mean and evil and stuff. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed. It's like we (you the readers and I) are in a bad relationship. "You suck!" "No, baby, I didn't mean it. Take me back. Update soon!" And then we take each other back. Every time. And the vicious cycle continues. So, I hope you guys take me back again. Should I be giving you flowers or you me?**

**Wow, that was kind of random. Oh, fyi, Diddy is real, and his nastiness is, unfortunately, VERY real. Anyone in the market for a stinky Boston? But I do love him. For a limited time, his picture is in place of Edward's on my profile page. Yeah, I know he's sideways.**

**So, here goes nothing, and remember to REAR. Thanks. And please read the author's note at the end.**

**Chapter 10**

**Can't Let Go**

**BPoV**

"Bella, can you stop bouncing in your seat and _pretend_ like you don't know about your surprise?" Edward asked. He sounded nothing short of exasperated. We were on our way over to Alice and Jasper's house. "You said you'd act surprised. Do you value my life at all?"

"Okay. Alright," I said as I took a few deep breaths to calm myself. "But you over exaggerate. I don't think Alice would kill you."

"No," he conceded. "But she could make my life harder than it needs to be."

"True," I nodded. "Okay, see? This is me all calm and nonchalant. I know nothing about my early birthday surprise. Usually I hate surprises, you know?"

Edward smiled. He knows. I hate surprises and attention and any gifts, especially for my birthday, which was actually in a couple of days. I haven't said anything about it, hoping, in vain apparently, that it would simply be forgotten. But this surprise…I smiled as I thought about it. I was beyond excited.

"Just out of curiosity, were you going to remind me that your birthday is in two days or were you going to make me suffer the guilt of forgetting?" he asked.

"No on both counts," I answered truthfully. Edward gave me a disapproving shake of his head and a click of his tongue. I shrugged and smiled innocently. It was true, but my mind was on other matters at the moment.

It's only been a little over a week since I last saw Coley, but I still missed her. I've seen her everyday for the past four years, and we've known each other since the fifth grade. And we've remained friends throughout my move to Forks.

"You guys finally get to meet Coley! And Chad!" Chad is Coley's fiancé. He plays baseball for the Arizona Diamondbacks. They've dated since high school and of course throughout college. Chad played ball for ASU as well. He's really nice and treats Coley like a goddess. They were so great together.

"Well, I should tell you that I've talked to Coley on the phone," Edward remarked offhandedly.

I nearly got whiplash, my head spun toward him so quickly. "What? When?"

"Last week. I was with Alice when Coley called and they talked about flowers. I didn't speak to her much. Just said hello."

It took a second to process this information.

I had just talked to Coley and she didn't say anything about talking to Edward or let on at all that she was coming. I wonder when this was planned.

"Did you know then that she was coming?" I asked.

Edward shook his head. "No, I didn't know about this until yesterday. Alice told me, and I was _supposed_ to keep it secret, and I've failed miserably." He was shaking his head in shame.

I squeezed his hand. "No, you didn't fail. I happened to be at the right place at the right time. But don't worry. I can act surprised."

Edward gave me a dubious look. "What? I can!" He snorted but otherwise let it go. I was a little offended. My acting skills aren't that bad, are they? I really didn't think so.

Thank goodness Edward changed the subject.

"So I guess we're all going to the Diamondbacks/Mariners game tomorrow. Coley had planned on a surprise visit for your birthday and it just so happened that Chad has an away game here. I'm anxious to meet him. He's a pretty good outfielder. It's just too bad the Diamondbacks aren't that good this year."

I shrugged. I didn't keep up with sports really. I mean at all. Coley, on the other hand, really enjoyed sports. She had to since Chad was a three-sport athlete all through high school; plus, she played volleyball. I'd go to the games with them, but never paid attention to the rules or strategy or anything. I didn't even get into baseball when Drew and I dated.

"Oh, Edward. I'm the MOH in Coley's wedding next month. It's obviously going to be in Phoenix, but did you want to go with me?" I didn't know how busy his med school schedule was yet so I thought I'd ask him now while it was on my mind.

"Absolutely," he smiled. "Thanks for asking." He squeezed my hand.

"You're welcome," I giggled, "but I didn't even tell you the date yet."

"Doesn't matter," he stated.

"But what if," I began to ask what if he has a conflict.

Edward shook his head. "Doesn't matter. I'm escorting you." There was decisiveness in his voice, but then he wrinkled his brow, "Um, should I know what the MOH is?"

"Maid of honor," I informed him. He nodded in understanding.

"Oh," Edward paused. I looked at him. "So you'll be walking in the procession with the…_BM_?" he snickered.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, the _best man_, not what you're thinking."

Edward laughed again. "He's not the _bowel movement_?"

I shook my head. "Very mature, Edward."

"So who's this BM going to be?" Edward asked. I swear I detected a little disdain in his tone. He could have been asking _Who's the schmuck you have to walk with?_

"Um, it's this baseball player. Drew Hanson. He's good friends with Chad."

"Oh," he paused to think a moment. "Do you mean Drew Hanson, the pitcher for the Diamondbacks?"

I nodded. "Yep, that's the one."

Edward smiled, "He's a really good pitcher. You know him, Bella?" Edward actually sounded a little excited.

"Yeah. We went on a few dates. He's really nice," I said as nonchalantly as I could in order to sound as detached as I could. I didn't want to assume that Edward would get jealous, but best come out with it.

"Wow. Okay. I hate that guy." Yes, there was definitely disdain coloring his tone.

"What? Two seconds ago you were just singing his praises. Now you hate him because we happened to have dated?" I asked, disbelieving.

Edward just pulled up to Alice's driveway and parked. "For the record, I wasn't singing his praises. I only pointed out that he's an above average athlete. Now what's your story? You said you went out on a few dates then you said you dated. Which is it?" Edward asked curiously.

I shrugged and turned my palms face up, making a face, "Is there a difference?"

"Yes. You either went on a few dates or you dated."

"We went on a few dates, _therefore_, we _dated_. What's the problem?" I asked. I was beginning to get a little irritated. "Are we seriously arguing over semantics?"

"I don't call this an argument. It's a colorful discussion," he grinned. At least he wasn't mad or anything.

I rolled my eyes, "More semantics."

"So," Edward asked for more clarification, "did you two date exclusively?"

"If you're asking if we were involved in a romantic relationship with each other, the answer is _no_."

Edward seemed please with this answer as he nodded at my response. His eyes narrowed as he thought of another question though, "How would you classify your relationship with Drew?"

"Just friends," I stated.

"Friends _with benefits_?" he asked.

"Um, I don't know which benefits you're talking about. Especially since I've embarrassingly established my experience or rather _inexperience_ with _more_," I retorted crossly.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot for a moment. Sorry. So no _more,_ but what about heavy petting?"

I just looked at Edward like he was crazy, which at this very moment, he was. "_Heavy petting_? Really? What is this, seventh grade health class?"

Edward ignored my sarcasm, "So how come nothing panned out with the pitcher seeing as he is such a nice guy?"

I sighed heavily and took Edward's face between my hands as I stared into his emerald eyes, "Well," I started to say before I crushed my lips on his allowing our mouths to move in sync. Our tongues met, danced, and teased each other's as the kiss deepened. After a moment, I broke away but kept looking into his eyes as I continue my answer to his question, "He isn't you," I stated plainly. "It starts and ends there." I gave him a chaste kiss, "Happy? Or do you plan on strapping me to a polygraph machine?"

Edward kissed me back and smiled, "I'm exceedingly happy. Thanks."

At this point, Diddy had remained uncharacteristically quiet, even throughout the kissing. The only thing that reminded us of his presence was the passing of gas. Not the sound but the stench. Edward and I both groaned and wrinkled our noses. That was our cue to get out of the car or risk dying from a silent but deadly torture.

I scooped up Diddy, still donning an orange argyle sweater vest, and we headed inside.

Alice greeted us eagerly as we entered. She gushed over Diddy's ensemble when I set him down to play with Mina who was sporting a bright pink Juicy Couture terrycloth hoodie. I shook my head. Only Alice. Well, only Alice and Hal.

Suddenly Alice was eyeing me carefully. Her eyes narrowed, "You know don't you?"

As naturally as I could, I gave her a questioning look. "Do I know what?"

She paused and looked from between Edward and me. I think Edward rolled his eyes and shook his head ever so slightly so she decided to let it go, much to my relief.

Jasper was in the dining room setting up for dinner while Rose and Emmett were coming down the stairs talking. As soon as Rosalie spotted me she grinned and ran over to me pulling me to the side.

"How was the movie?" she asked eagerly. "I mean I read the Mars and Venus column. It's really good, but you didn't go into specific detail about Rob Pattinson."

I laughed while Edward rolled his eyes again. "What is it with you women and that vampire guy?" he asked shaking his head.

I was about to retort but was interrupted by two more female voices asking, "Did someone mention Rob Pattinson?"

I laughed. One voice belonged to Alice of course and the other voice came from the top of the stairs. I looked up to see Coley hopping down the stairs two at a time with Chad in tow. I was amazed. I surely would have broken my neck had I attempted that.

"Surprise!" Coley squealed.

"Ahhhhhh!" we both screamed as we hugged each other. It was so great to see her again, and the feeling was clearly mutual. Even though I knew she'd be there I was still happy, excited and felt a little surprise from the anticipation of seeing her. Everyone just stood by laughing at us. We could be such girls at times.

"Cole, you look great!"

"Thanks. Oh, happy birthday! I wish I could say the same. I mean from the knees up you look fantastic, Bells. You need to heal faster though so you can dance at my wedding," she ordered.

"I'm trying. I'm trying." I looked to Chad. He was grinning at me as well. "Hey, Chad. Long time no see."

He came over to hug me. "Good to see you again, Bella. Happy birthday. Sorry to hear about the captain, but I have to say, it was only a matter of time." I gave him a playful shove and he laughed. "I'm amazed you haven't had more broken appendages than you have."

"Hey, I didn't have any broken bones while living in Forks, I'll have you know," I defended myself.

"As long as you stay away from those spelling bees you'll be okay," Chad snickered.

Uh-oh. It was going to be one of those nights. Let's rehash Bella's least graceful moments.

Emmett chuckled. "Whoa. Am I to understand that Bella injured herself at a spelling bee?" He shook his head. "How in the world do you do that? Stab yourself putting on your nametag?"

"Shut up, Emmett. They shouldn't put those chairs so close together and then so close to the edge of the stage. It could have happened to anyone actually." I shook my head at the memory.

Edward laughed and shook his head as well as he, and I'm sure the rest of the group, pieced together my tripping and falling off the stage during a spelling bee in the eighth grade. I narrowed my eyes at Edward and he wrapped his arms around me. "Only you, Bella," he whispered in my ear. I could hear the smile in his voice.

"I'm glad my clumsiness amuses everyone," I said indignantly. I then noticed Coley eyeing me and I remembered to introduce Edward to her and Chad. "Coley, Chad, this is Edward. Edward, meet Coley and Chad," I gestured with my hands.

Edward and Chad shook hands and exchanged pleasantries. Edward told him he was a fan. Then Edward shook Coley's hand. "Good to meet you finally, Coley."

"Likewise, Edward," she smiled. "Thanks for taking care of Bella." She looked at me and I was pleading with my eyes for her not to embarrass me too much. She didn't, thank goodness.

Edward smiled crookedly. "It's a pleasure."

"Um, I think there's something wrong with your dog," Emmett said out of nowhere. His face was scrunched up like he just smelled something bad, which he did.

"Yeah, that's what he does," Edward pointed out. "Sorry. I hope he doesn't ruin anyone's appetite," he apologized.

"Wow," Jasper said, "You weren't lying when you said he's a stinker. I just thought he was a typical puppy getting into trouble, but he literally is a stinker."

"Do you think there's something wrong with him? I mean medically? Because that's not normal," Alice chimed in.

"And why, pray tell, would Bella have a normal dog?" Coley giggled.

We then sat down to dinner. Fortunately, the talk strayed from me to Chad and Coley. The guys were really interested in baseball talk and, of course, the game the next day. Emmett pretended to be mad because I hadn't told him about knowing pro baseball players before. I didn't know it mattered.

After dinner we talked about the wedding. Coley moved it up a month because the Diamondbacks were mathematically out of the playoffs and she wanted to get married and honeymoon well before spring training started back up.

"Isn't it so romantic to plan your life around baseball?" she asked sarcastically but winked at Chad who smiled at her in return.

The rest of the evening was spent catching up on the past week, the goings on in Phoenix, how Charlie is doing, my broken captain incident, Hal decorating my apartment, Mars and Venus, and of course Edward and me. That last topic was discussed in Alice's spare bedroom as she and I tried on the bride's maid dresses. How cool was it that Coley asked Alice to be in her wedding even though they hadn't met until this day? They've talked a ton over the years though, and I always knew they'd get along.

So anyway, I told the girls about our shameless flirtation and how Edward blurted out that he loved me. Even though it wasn't the most romantic of scenarios, the girls all swooned with me.

The subject then turned to _more_, of course.

"So, Bells, are you still a proud member of the V Society?" Coley asked with a grin.

I snickered. "_Yes_. Am I the last virgin over the age of twenty-one?"

"Hardly," Rose answered. "But are you waiting until marriage?"

I shrugged, "Maybe. Maybe not." Coley and Alice were smirking at me, and I conceded with a smirk of my own, "Okay, most likely not. I'm thinking pretty soon actually. I'm just a little nervous is all."

"Don't be nervous. It'll happen when it's the right time. There's no sense stressing about it. Just let 'er rip," Coley said and then immediately cupped her hand over her mouth and bugged her eyes out. We all laughed at the comment. "Uh, no pun intended," she added as we continued our fit of laughter.

"Anyway," Coley continued after we had calmed ourselves, "Edward seems really into you. I'm sure he's just as nervous as you are. I mean, the pressure's on him don't you think? He'll be representing for the men. He'll be your ambassador to sex."

"_Ambassador to sex?_ Like sex is a foreign country," Alice chuckled.

"Absolutely," Coley said. "Through him you'll find out what the big whup is all about. He'll leave you either thinking _oh my god what have I been missing? Or oh, I really haven't been missing much._ The pressure's on your boy," she concluded. Wow. I've never looked at it that way. I felt a little better now. Though I was more than just fairly certain that Edward wouldn't disappoint.

Edward and I left shortly after the girl talk. Chad had to get back to the hotel so he could rest up for the game, but I was able to chat with him a bit more before we left. Edward talked to Coley and Alice while they cleaned up in the dining room. We all made plans to meet at the park. Coley distributed our tickets and passes. Apparently we'd be watching from a suite. It seemed to be a big deal to the guys. Coley told us girls that it was nice because we'd have our own server for food and drinks and our own private bathroom so no waiting in long lines. Plus, we didn't have to pay attention to the game if we didn't want to.

The next day Hal was gracious enough to take Diddy for the day since we'd be at the game which started at noon and then the girls and I were going to see the vampire movie, eat, and do a little shopping. While the guys were completely engrossed in the baseball game, we girls just chatted some more in the back of the suite. It's weird how we never run out of things to talk about. So really, our girls' bonding time started during the baseball game.

After the game Edward headed back to his apartment. He had some work to do there, but he kissed me goodbye and told me to have fun with the girls. He said he'd pick me up from Alice's around seven.

Instead of eating at a restaurant after the movie, Alice dragged us to a day spa. She argued that they'd serve us a little food, but we could get manis and pedis and chat. It was supposed to be fun.

I was subjected to the hair removal first though, and that was far from fun. Alice had been going on and on about her girl that sugared, and Coley wanted to give it a try. Apparently, sugaring is a form of hair removal that is better than waxing, and her girl, Erica, did the best Brazillian's. Uh, okay. If that was supposed to be less painful than waxing, I don't even want to experience waxing. Erica was quick, I'll give her that. And I guess it wasn't all that painful once you get over the initial shock of it all. Also, Erica was thorough. I don't think I had a hair left on me down south there.

We finally got to chat some more as we were getting our pedicures. The girls were gushing about how hot Rob Pattinson looked in the film, as well as some of the other actors, but mostly it was all about Rob Pattinson.

"I told Chad that Rob Pat is on my laminated list. At the top of the list actually," Coley giggled.

"What did he say?" I asked smiling. The laminated list is the final list of people that your significant other will approve of you leaving them for or at the very least having a one nighter with.

"He just shrugged his okay."

I laughed. "Okay, then who's at the top of Chad's laminated list?"

Coley rolled her eyes, "Shannon Elizabeth." We all gave her a weird look. "I know. She's so eight years ago right? Sure she came back with the Dancing With the Stars shenanigans, but really what has she done since _American Pie_? Frankly, I'm disappointed he couldn't come up with anyone hotter for his list, but oh well. To each his own."

I asked the other two about their laminated lists. Alice's top choice of all people was Jackson Rathbone and Rosalie's was Kellan Lutz. Odd choices, but again, to each her own. Apparently Ashley Greene and Nikki Reed were at the top of Jasper and Emmett's lists respectively. I wrinkled my brow at those choices as well. Where did they come up with these people?

"What about you, Bella?" Alice asked.

I grinned, "Coley and I will have to wrestle to see who gets Rob Pattinson I guess."

We went back to Alice's house about an hour before Edward was coming to get me. We ate some leftovers from the night before and then Alice thought it'd be fun to make me over for old time's sake. I got a sinking feeling in my stomach. I was clearly outnumbered as Coley and Rose both thought it was a brilliant idea especially since each had a specialty. Alice would do my makeup, Rose my hair, and Coley would style me. My job was to shut up and take the abuse.

The doorbell rang just as Coley zipped up my ridiculous ruffly, foo-foo, midnight blue silk dress. It looked especially ridiculous because I was still in my boot and was wearing a navy blue Chuck Taylor sneaker from the day on my left foot.

Alice and Rose went downstairs together.

"Coley," I whined. "Edward's here to pick me up. I need to change back into my jeans or he'll think we're all a bunch of freaks dressing me up for nothing."

She merely clicked her tongue at me, "You don't know that. I bet he'll love this look on you." She turned me around to look at myself in the full-length mirror.

"Whoa," I gasped. I have to admit, the dress fit me perfectly. My makeup was impeccable and I had cascading waves partially swept up, a look that I'd never be able to duplicate on my own. The boot and sneaker still looked silly compared to the rest of the ensemble though. "I clean up pretty good, eh?"

"I'll say," said a smooth voice from the doorway. I turned around to see Edward smiling crookedly at me.

"Oh, Edward," I whispered in awe. He took my breath away as he neared me clad in his classic tuxedo. His hair was once again in perfect disarray and he was holding some freesias, a few of which he tucked into my hair.

Edward kissed my cheek. "You look amazing, love."

"As do you." I looked at him warily. "What's going on?"

"Oh just another birthday surprise." I opened my mouth to protest. "Don't be difficult, Bella," Edward said placing his fore finger over my pursed lips.

Coley giggled. "I like you, Edward." She then kissed my cheek and then Edward's. "Have fun, kids." And she left the room. I stared after her as realization sank in. Those stinkers were all in on this. I was ambushed!

I looked up expectantly at Edward. He smiled again and then scooped me up into his arms and carried me down the stairs. The girls all laughed at my humorless expression as Edward waved his goodbyes to them and took me out to his car. I got in, albeit reluctantly, but refused to strap on my seatbelt until Edward told me what was going on.

"Bella, do you trust me?"

"That's beside the point, Edward," I answered crossing my arms over my chest.

He smiled, "So you do trust me then." It wasn't a question. He knew I did. "Okay then," he held up a blindfold. My mouth dropped open but he pleaded with me, "Please?"

I rolled my eyes. I might as well. Everyone else had their way with me. "Fine," I said tersely.

So I was blindfolded and then driven to an unknown locale. Well, it was unknown until we entered the building. Edward was carrying me again. From the smell of the surroundings, I could tell we were in our apartment building. I was suddenly glad I had the blindfold on so I wouldn't have to feel embarrassed about the strange looks I'm sure we were getting.

"Edward," I said as we got in the elevator. "I know we're home. You can take the blindfold off now."

He didn't answer me. I only felt his lips on mine as he kissed me in a way that one, made me shut up, and two, let me know that we were definitely alone in the elevator. We finally reached the fifth floor and he placed me on my feet as we stood outside his apartment. Faintly, I heard music in the background coming from Edward's place.

Edward thankfully removed the blindfold. He was smiling at me again, and I forgot how peeved I was as I stared into his eyes. I was lost in them. There was so much love there. He was tracing my jaw line with his finger. God I love it when he does that. I felt shivers go down my spine.

Edward broke the silence. "Bella, I know this is about four years too late, but I only have one question for you right now." I swallowed and listened hard. "Will you go to the prom with me?"

Edward looked _me_ expectantly now. I couldn't stop the smile from creeping over my lips as his words registered in my brain. I gave him a strange look but answered in the affirmative anyway, "Sure."

Edward grinned, placed a quick kiss on my lips and then spun me around as he opened the door to his apartment. The music got louder once the door was fully open. I gasped for the third time that evening as I took in the setting before me.

Edward's apartment was transformed into a small prom complete with balloons, flower arrangements, colored lights, and a dance floor.

"Happy birthday, Isabella. May I have this dance?"

I smiled and nodded my consent as he took my hand and led me to the dance floor, which was his living room. We slow danced to the rest of Dave Matthews Band's _Crash_ as he explained the premise behind my belated prom.

"I knew you didn't want me to buy you anything so I thought I'd recreate the prom for you to experience. I'm sorry this didn't happen when the real prom was going on, but I kind of like this scenario. What do you think?"

I smiled. "This is pretty special. Thank you, Edward, I love it." I tugged on his bowtie so he'd lean his head down for a kiss since I found it difficult to stand on my tiptoes in the boot.

We continued to dance as the iPod changed to the next song.

The long intro to the song sounded familiar. "What's this?" I asked.

"23 by Jimmy Eat World." I nodded.

We continued to dance as we listened to some of the lyrics:

_Amazing still it seems_

_I'll be 23_

_I won't always love what I'll never have_

_I won't always live in my regrets_

_You'll sit alone forever_

_If you wait for the right time_

_What are you hoping for?_

_I'm here I'm now I'm ready_

_Holding on tight_

_Don't give away the end_

_The one thing that stays mine_

I loved this song. I sighed, "One hundred."

"No, the song is 23, in honor of your twenty-third birthday. Plus, the lyrics are so right on don't you think?"

I laughed. "No, Edward. Not the song. I mean _percentage check_. One hundred."

**A/N Hmmm, this is getting tricky. I think I just painted myself into a corner again *cough* Chapter 32 of **_**Saving Me**_** *cough* So, would anyone mind terribly if I changed the rating from T to M? (Stop cackling, Phantom and spare me the **_**I told you so**_**). Review and let me know.**


	11. Oh God, MORE!

**A/N I am not Stephenie Meyer (clearly, I am not) and, therefore, I do not own Twilight.**

**Ladies and Gentlemen: Introducing New CLG, Rated M. Now with lemon freshness!**

**Okay, so peer pressure is alive and well. I have changed the rating as you can see. You know I like to give the people what they want. I **_**hope**_** this is what you want. You know I only write lemons when I have to and also I suck at them but here goes. With much trepidation, I give you the next installment. (Bites bottom lip nervously) Yeah, okay here you go. If you don't want to read the lemon, I've sectioned it off for you, but it's most of this chapter. In summary, Edward and Bella get it on. REAR please.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chapter 11**

**BPoV**

I was waiting patiently watching Edward process my words. Yep, I told him one hundred. And I _was _sure. I really was. I loved Edward, and he loved me. We'd known each other for about seven years now. We were best friends for much of that time. We were best friends again now. He wanted more. I knew I want more. I knew I want him. I mean look at him. Edward Cullen period is jumpable, but Edward Cullen who was in love with me _and _wearing a tux? Mmmm. He was downright doable, and if I may borrow a descriptor from Mr. Big, _abso-fucking-lutely _doable, hence the one hundred.

I couldn't believe he recreated the prom for me. Well, I guess I could. Edward was the kindest, sweetest man to ever walk this planet or any other so yes, I could believe it. Who else would think to do this and then go ahead and do this?

We stopped dancing a moment as Edward stared at me. His eyes were silently asking me if I was sure. I merely returned his gaze, not blinking, not backing down. A small, knowing smile formed on both our lips simultaneously, and we started swaying to the music once again. He held me a little tighter, but I was still waiting for Edward's articulated response. He still hadn't said anything though. He, instead, leaned his head down for me to kiss again.

****************************************************************************************************

Once his mouth engulfed mine in an urgent, passion-filled kiss I decided to take matters into my own hands, literally. I remembered the response I elicited from my _payback_ a few days ago so I began massaging the boys again and stroking Edward through his tuxedo pants. I could feel his erection already, and I felt heat course through me as I longed to actually see it.

Now, just because I hadn't had any personal experience with more and all that it entailed, didn't mean that I was completely clueless. After all, Coley was my best friend, and she and Chad had been exclusive in high school and obviously in college so we had many chats on the subject. It was new to her too, once upon a time, but she had me to confide in, and in the process, I was schooled, if only in theory.

Edward finally uttered a response. Not words though, not yet. He moaned his pleasure into my mouth. I smiled. Just the reaction I wanted.

Edward finally spoke in a husky voice, "Bella, love, ugh," he moaned again as I continued to stroke and massage. "That…feels…so…good, but…are…you…sure?"

So sweet. He was once again giving me an out. Not tonight. My mind, and my body, were made up. I wanted this just as much as he did.

"Edward, _love_," I smiled as I reciprocated his term of endearment for me, "I want this. I want you, and I want _more_." I was looking right into his eyes as I said this while my hands were busy, and for once, dexterous enough to undo his pants.

I didn't know if it was the pet name I used or the words themselves, but Edward's green eyes narrowed a bit, smoldered even, and turned dark. He nodded, kicked off his shoes and stepped out of the tuxedo pants once gravity had pulled them to the floor. He then scooped me up again carrying me into his bedroom.

Once we entered, he kicked the door shut behind us. He set me down and asked while idly playing with the plunging neckline of my dress, "Now, where were we?"

I smiled as we moved in closer together, our lips met once again and I helped him shrug out of his tuxedo jacket. Edward's hands had wandered to the small of my back and then covered my butt, squeezing my cheeks and pulling me toward his body. I fought the urge to give in to the weakness I felt in my knees as I continued to undress him.

I bit my bottom lip as I tugged on his bowtie, undoing it and then tossed it carelessly over my shoulder. Slowly, I unbuttoned his shirt and traced my fingers over his hard, muscular chest, lingering on his nipples, lazily rubbing circles and gently pinching them. I felt another squeeze so I quickly glanced up at Edward. The look on his face could only be described as lustful. Very sexy. I couldn't resist the urge so I went ahead and tasted one of his nipples while continuing to pinch the other. Mmmm. I loved how they hardened at my touch. "Isabella," Edward moaned as I softly bit down.

He let go of my bottom as he shrugged out of his shirt and then took my face in between his massive hands. "My turn," he whispered.

As Edward's warm tongue traced my lips, he unzipped me and made real the saying _off like a prom dress_. Swiftly, he picked me up bridal style and carried me to his bed. I had to laugh as he took off the sneaker I was still wearing and then unbuckled the boot. Edward quirked an eyebrow up at me.

"The boot is so sexy, isn't it?" I giggled.

"Very," he chuckled.

Once the stupid immobilization device was removed, I fell back on my elbows on top of the plush pillows. I chewed my bottom lip again as I felt Edward's hot gaze on my body. I was only wearing a lace bra and hipsters the same shade of my dress. This was the most skin I'd ever shown Edward so I couldn't help but blush a bit.

"Exquisite," he murmured. "The lingerie as well as the blush," he smiled crookedly. I swear that smile was the key to my undoing.

Or perhaps it was what he did next. Edward caressed me, his fingertips softly yet purposefully moved from my jaw line down my neck, across my collar bone, down the valley between my breasts, stopped at the top of my panties, leaving nothing but fire in their wake. He paused only to gage my reaction. I let out the breath that I didn't know I was holding and licked my lips as I peered at him from underneath my eyelashes.

His nimble fingers stroked the fabric of my underwear that was covering my core. I gasped at the sensation and my legs automatically parted from his touch. He then kissed his way back up. This time my back arched from the fleeting heat of his mouth on the underwear where his fingers were. I writhed in ecstasy as his tongue moved up my body taking the same path his fingers had. My tongue fervently met his as I allowed it entrance in my mouth. This time I moaned into his mouth while his hands were massaging my breasts. He reached his hands behind me to undo my bra. I sat up just enough for Edward to let the straps fall off my shoulders so he could completely remove it and throw it off to the side. His hands quickly covered my breasts, returning the favor of pinching and rolling the nipples. I gasped again as I felt his hot mouth on my right breast, his tongue and teeth grazing my hard nipple.

Down at my core, I could feel Edward's arousal poking at my covered entrance. I bucked my hips toward his in order to create more of the friction I so desperately wanted and needed.

I freed my fingers from his glorious hair in order to push on Edward's shoulders. He lifted his head to look up at me. "Roll over," I ordered.

Edward was back on his elbows, and now it was my turn to ogle _his_ body. And what a fit specimen he was. I sat next to him licking my lips again at the sight before me. I leaned down for a kiss before I set to work moving my fingers, I hoped, the same way he had done to me. I paused when I got to the top of his boxer briefs. I stroked him through the fabric eliciting another moan. I leaned my head down to take the tip of his shaft in my mouth, still through the fabric, and still another moan. I loved hearing that sound from Edward. Not only did it turn me on even more, it added fuel to the fire, encouraging me to continue.

I tugged on his underwear, shimmying them off as best I could until he lifted his hips to help me take them off. _Oh my god!_ Was my man well endowed! Truly he was blessed, and truly I was blessed as well. I quickly and silently thanked my lucky stars. I pursed my lips to the side for the briefest of moments as I silently said another prayer while making small circles on the shaft tip. I hoped it would fit. It would have to right?

I felt the wetness of the precum on his tip then on my finger, and brought my finger up to my mouth to lick it off.

"Oh, god, Bella," Edward moaned as he watched my suck on me finger tip and then lick my lips. I then moved my head down to take the tip of his shaft in my mouth, licking and sucking on it, moving more and more of it into my mouth as Edward's hips bucked in response. What I couldn't fit in my mouth I covered with my right hand while massaging the boys with my left hand. Edward's hands were on my head keeping it close to his body, moving it in rhythm with his grinding. Suddenly I felt his body tense while he let out a feral growl as he came in my mouth. I sucked and swallowed as much as I could from his release. What I missed, I licked off of him and what was on my hand I smeared down his chest and stomach before I bent down to lick it off again. I had just smacked and licked my lips again when Edward swiftly moved and had me on my back. My hands pinned above my head as he hovered over me. I could feel his body against mine but none of his weight.

"_That_ was so fucking sexy, Bella," Edward's voice was thick with lust. Holy crap! Edward never swore like that. Normally I didn't like the f-bomb being dropped for no apparent reason. It was reserved for times when absolutely no other word would suffice, like when I broke the captain, for instance. But now, maybe it was his tone of voice combined with the dirty look in his eyes. Factor in my feelings of want, and god help me, I was even more aroused.

I didn't know where it came from, but I responded with, "No, you saying _fuck _is fucking sexy." And that was when I learned. Edward likes it when I swore in bed. He was just as turned on as I was. He covered my mouth with his as one hand left a trail of heat from my breast down to my lace underwear again. He fingered the cloth over my folds.

"You're so wet, Isabella, I can't wait to taste you." I moaned my pleasure at his words and actions as Edward all but tore off my lace panties right before he swung my legs over his shoulders and began… _reciprocating_.

Yes, reciprocity is nothing short of fantastic. I'd never felt anything like this up to this point in all my twenty-three years of life. First and foremost, I was glad I got that Brazilian. Edward also approved of it as he licked his own lips and gazed appreciatively at the handiwork. "Nice," he commented as he grazed the opening of my folds with his finger, gathering up some of my wetness with it and then sucking it off the tip. "Mmm, you taste just as sweet as I imagined, love."

I swear, if I weren't already lying down, my knees would have buckled. How he could go from dirty to sweet in a heartbeat I'd never know, but this man was straight up sexy. Just as a moan left my mouth, I gasped as Edward lowered his head and I felt his hot tongue on my folds. I bucked my hips up toward his mouth. "Oh, god, Edward," I moaned as his tongue darted in and out, going deeper and deeper upon each reentry. My fingers wound around his hair and pushed his head closer still to my core. My legs parted even further to allow him more access.

All my inhibitions were thrown to the wayside as I allowed my body to give in to the pleasure Edward was providing. "Oh, god, Edward. Yes!" I continued to buck my hips against his mouth as he was sucking and nipping on my clit while his hands were massaging my breasts. _Oh, my god, this was what I've been missing?_

The sensations I was feeling were unreal. I didn't want him to stop. My entire body was shivering and reacting to this sex god. It was, for lack of a better word, _electric_. I'd never felt that...tingly before.

"Oh, Edward! Oh, _fuck!_" I blurted as he gave my clit another flick and suck and after that huge build up, I experienced my first orgasm. It felt like waves of pleasure, throbbing, but not in a painful way, from my pelvis on out. Wow!

I thought Edward was finished, but upon hearing me swear and then come, his tongue kept working causing my body to twist and writhe. It was almost too much, but I wanted more still. I felt drained, but I wanted more _more!_

As if reading my mind, Edward slowed down. He gave the length of my folds a final lick and started kissing my inner thigh, moving up to my hip bone, naval, breasts, collar bones, neck, making his way back up to my mouth. I could taste myself on his tongue from his kiss. And then I felt him position himself at my entrance. He was teasing me with the tip of his erection, entering just a bit and pulling completely out several times over. Perhaps he wasn't teasing as much as acclimating me to his size. Whatever he was doing, it was driving me crazy.

"Edward, please," I moaned. He pinned my hands above my head once again. I needed to feel him inside me.

"Are you ready, love?" he whispered in my ear.

I nodded fervently, "Yes, Edward, yes!"

He was still hovered over me, watching my face closely as he slowly entered me. I felt him push more and more of himself inside, pausing after each push to allow me to get used to him. On the third push, I felt him up against the membrane. His eyes boring into mine, Edward told me, "I love you, Bella," and kissed me softly.

I stared right back, ready for the next push. "I love you too, Edward," I whispered in response. I nodded, giving him the okay to push once again. This time, I whimpered a little as I felt him penetrate through the thin layer of tissue. Edward paused again and waited for me, he had a look of concern on his otherwise perfect face. His eyes were asking if I was okay.

I let out a breath, "I'm okay. It's…tolerable. Give me a moment, please." He nodded and I let out another deep breath as my body adjusted to his size. "There," I said and smiled impishly.

Edward smirked, "_Tolerable_?" I grinned and stuck my tongue out. "Are you ready, Isabella? I'll show you tolerable."

Edward crushed his lips to mine and began plunging in and out. I met his rhythm, bucking and grinding against each of his thrusts. My body squeezed him even more each time he entered me. The muscles I used to contract around him only added to the heightened sensation I felt.

"You're so tight, Bella. It feels so good inside you, love."

I closed my eyes and moaned with each thrust as I grew closer to another climax.

"No, Bella, open your eyes. I want to see them when you come for me," Edward managed to tell me through a grimace. I did as he said.

"Oh, god, Edward!" I moaned again. Our eyes were locked. I could tell he was trying very hard to control himself. He, in turn, could tell I was very close to the edge and sped up his pace accordingly. "Oh, god, Edward, yes. Yes!" I was just about there. Edward knew it.

"Come with me, Bella," he urged. We both moaned our pleasure as he slammed into me one last time sending more waves of bliss pulsing through me. The grimace on Edward's face relaxed and softened as he collapsed onto me still planting kisses on my neck and jaw.

"Mmm," I sighed in contentment.

"Tolerable?" Edward teased.

"That was a little bit of alright," I teased back.

"Happy birthday, Isabella."

"Thank you, Mr. Ambassador," I smiled. Edward gave me a strange look causing me to giggle. "Don't ask," I advised.

"Okay, I won't," he shrugged.

We stayed in his bed listening to music as Edward held me close. Occasionally we'd kiss but we mostly just reveled in our closeness. After a while I decided I wanted to get freshened up. I gave Edward a quick peck and began to get up. "Where are you going?" he pouted.

I made a face, "I'm all sweaty and sticky. I need a shower," I informed him as I walked gingerly toward the door.

"Ah," he smiled wickedly, "Care for some company then?"

I opened the door to step out. Looking over my shoulder I called back to Edward, "Love some." And in a flash, naked Edward was by my side ushering me into his bathroom. He turned on the shower and then looked at me as I leaned against the wall waiting. "What?" I asked.

Edward merely smiled his crooked smile, "Is it your birthday or mine?" he asked. "Because I feel like a kid on Christmas right now."

"Hmm, funny," I said as I grazed and groped the boys again, "you don't _look_ like a kid." His little ambassador began to cmme to attention once again inviting me to stroke him.

Edward groaned as he kissed me in response, pushing his warm body against mine, my back still against the cold wall. I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist, feeling his erection on my skin, rubbing against my entrance.

Edward walked us to the shower; I was still clinging to him tightly, like a spider monkey as he stepped in never breaking the kiss. I was almost in sensory overload as he penetrated me once again. My back was now against the cold shower wall as Edward pumped in and out of me. The hot water from the shower pelted against his body and splashed onto mine. The cold, the hot, the thrusting, the kissing, his tongue. It was all too much and so it didn't take me long to climax for the third time that night. I threw my head back and moaned "Edward!" as my walls clamped around Edward's ambassador causing him to come again.

************************************************* *********************************************************

This was a happy birthday for me indeed. I sighed in contentment again and smiled against his lips. "What are you doing to me, Edward? I've gone from no _more_ whatsoever to experiencing a three-peat all in one night."

Edward chuckled. "I aim to please."

"I'll say," I agreed as he finally set me down. We actually got to clean ourselves off now as we shared the water and the occasional kiss. I noticed he had my brand of body wash as well as his own. He also had my shampoo and conditioner on his counter. I looked at him curiously when he reached to grab them along with a shower pouf from the counter and brought them in for use.

"I noted what you have in your bathroom so I bought you more of it," he shrugged. "I figure they're not really gifts if they're necessities, right?"

I kissed his hand. "You're so thoughtful."

Edward shrugged, "I aim to please," he reiterated.

We continued to shower. I washed his hair and body, and then Edward washed mine. It was very sensual, but we managed to finish without _more_. I was actually pretty tired at this point anyway. It was enough just to be close to Edward.

So we towel dried each other off and crawled back into Edward's comfortable bed where I snuggled up against Edward sticking my arctic cold feet against his warm legs and wrapping one of his arms around my waist so I could fall asleep.

**A/N So, yeah. There you go. Let me know whatcha think. (gulp)**


	12. Porn Star and Love Guru

**A/N I do not own Twilight, well, save for a battered paperback copy.**

**Anyhoo, I hope everyone else enjoys the story. If you do, please feel free and let me know. If you don't, feel free and let me know. Negative reviews are welcomed. Just please give me a chance to reply so I don't have to suck up time in an A/N and let everyone else know your business. **

**Okay, so back to the story.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 12**

The actual day of my birthday I woke up in a familiar position: in bed wrapped in Edward's arms. However, this day was slightly different; we both were naked, and this was not my bed.

I felt Edward's breath on the back of my neck, and relished in the warmth radiating from his body onto mine. I rubbed my feet together to see if they were still warm. Yep. Amazing. Edward really had replaced my electric blanket! Who needed electrical devices when you had Edward Cullen? Not me.

I smiled as I thought about the previous night. Wow. That about covered _more_. Well, it covered more with Edward anyway. He represented very well for the men, I had to say. And he didn't even know he was my personal ambassador to the land of sex.

I thought about the three-peat. Was three times in one night a normal occurrence? I didn't recall Coley ever telling me about a three-timer. Twice was the most she had mentioned if memory served. Hmm, perhaps Edward was an anomaly. Happy birthday to me!

I sighed in content and then flinched slightly when I heard Edward's smooth voice muffled by my hair, "Happy birthday, Bella." I felt him shake as he laughed at my reaction.

I smiled as I turned to face him. "I thought you were still asleep," I said before kissing his soft lips.

"Actually, I've been awake for a while, love. I didn't want to get out of bed because it's just so comfortable in here with you," he informed me while tightening his hold.

"We're naked," I commented.

"And there's that," he remarked. "I have a beautiful woman whom I'm in love with in my bed. Why should I get up?"

"We have to get up eventually," I pointed out, "But I understand your point of view. I have a _more_ god in bed with me," I smiled.

Edward chuckled, "I'm honored, but I couldn't have done it without you."

I giggled, "You got that right. I believe we both played integral roles."

We soon parted ways for a while to get ready for the day. I threw on Edward's Beatles t-shirt and did the walk of shame fifteen feet across the hall to my apartment. Edward agreed to run upstairs to retrieve Diddy from Hal to bring back to my place after he got dressed.

I had gotten dressed and even talked to Renee for a good thirty minutes and Edward still wasn't back yet.

Renee had called to wish me a happy birthday. We talked about the paper and how Charlie was doing. I told her about Coley's surprise visit and also about Edward and I getting together finally. I told her about Diddy as well. I'd get to see her and Phil at Coley's wedding next month so we talked about that, but there was an undertone of anxiety and excitement in my mom's voice apart from being glad to see me next month. I asked her what else was up.

"Oh, Bella, guess what. Phil and I just got approved to adopt!" She sounded so ecstatic.

I was taken aback. I didn't know they had wanted to adopt. "Wow, Mom, that's great, but when did you decide to adopt?"

"We've thought about it for a while now. We didn't want to jinx ourselves and talk about it, but the paperwork has gone through. We'll be adopting an eight-year-old boy, Eli. He's so sweet, Bella. You'll love him. He's been in the foster care system for a couple years now, and he needs a good home. I think his parents are in jail, poor little guy. He's so bright too, Bella, and…Baby, are you still there?"

I nodded even though she couldn't see me. I was just trying to take everything in. Mom and Phil were adopting? "Mom, are you sure about this?" That was the most diplomatic way I could put it. I didn't want to come right out and lecture her about how this wasn't like taking up another hobby or even taking in a stray. This little boy, Eli, sounded like he needed stability. I just hoped my mom could provide that and was ready to provide that for him. The thought of being a big sister, though, kind of appealed to me, even though I'd be a long-distance big sis. And it warmed my heart that Mom and Phil wanted to reach out to Eli.

Renee assured me that she and Phil had discussed adoption at length. They wanted to adopt an older child because one, they didn't have the energy it took for a newborn, two, older children had a harder time being adopted so Eli's chances of finding a family were getting slimmer as he grew older, and three, they were completely and irrevocably in love with Eli, and he with them. Apparently, they'd been able to spend time with Eli first to see if they all got along, which they did. That sold it for me. I told Renee I was happy for all of them and looked forward to meeting Eli, my little brother, at Coley's wedding. She in turn promised to email me pictures of Eli and tell him more about his big sister.

Renee emailed me while we were still speaking on the phone. She sent me a picture of Eli. Oh, man was he cute. He was an African-American boy. His hair was cut close to his scalp. He had big brown eyes and chubby cheeks. He was playing catch with Phil in the photo. It made me smile. I was actually very excited to meet Eli now, as I told my mom.

Renee had to go soon after. She and Phil were going to bring Eli home today. I told her good luck and that I'd love to talk to Eli later if he was up to it, but not to pressure the poor kid.

I had taken my laptop into my office to print out Eli's picture when I heard Edward finally came back from Hal's.

I was holding Eli's picture and smiling as I was heading toward the living room to see Edward.

"Hey, Edward, guess what," I said from the hall before I could even see him. I stopped moving when I saw the look on his face. His brow was furrowed and he was biting his bottom lip. Weird.

"What's wrong?" I asked. And then I noticed he didn't have Diddy with him. "Where's Diddy?"

"Um, Bella, we have a bit of a situation on our hands," he said calmly while eyeing me carefully like he was expecting an alien to burst out of my chest.

"What kind of a situation? What are you talking about?" I asked.

"It's a bit of a hostage situation I guess." I gazed at Edward with a perplexed expression, willing him to explain further. "Hal and Shane…well, _Shane_ doesn't want to give up Diddy." The confusion didn't leave my face. I was still very much baffled. "Let me start from the beginning," he said.

"Please do," I urged as I was finally able to move forward and sit on the sofa next to Edward.

"Well, Shane used to have a Boston when he was younger. Smuckers. Anyway, Smuckers was run over and Shane witnessed it." I gasped upon hearing young Shane seeing his dog get hit right in front of his eyes. Edward nodded as if to validate my response. "Yeah, and…long story short, Diddy reminds him of Smuckers and now Shane refuses to let him go."

"_What_? But he's…_our_ dog!" I was incredulous.

"Well, I told them I'd talk to you…" Edward was hesitant.

"About what? Giving up our dog?"

Edward nodded ruefully. "Well, we've only been doggy parents for what? Three days?" he pointed out.

Just then there was a timid knock on my door. "Come in!" I bellowed still looking at Edward. "Did you already tell them we'd give up Diddy?"

He shook his head, "I didn't guarantee anything."

We both then turned our attention to the door. In walked Hal and Shane, cradling Diddy. They both smiled apologetically at us causing me to relax my face a bit.

"Hey, Bella. Happy birthday," they said in unison, and I couldn't help but smile just a little.

"Thanks, guys." Hal came over to give me a hug. I looked to Shane, "So, I hear you kind of like Diddy?" I asked brightly.

Shane nodded, still looking apologetic. I kept thinking about him and Smuckers. There was no way I could be upset with him. "And here I thought you didn't like dogs, Shane. Hal said you wouldn't allow him to have a dog upstairs."

Shane came to sit on the other side of me, and we were both petting Diddy. "Bella, let me explain." I nodded looking at him expectantly. "So Smuckers, did Edward tell you about Smuckers?" I nodded. "So you know he was run over right in front of me?"

I nodded, "Yes. I'm sorry. That must have been horrible. How old were you?"

"I was ten, and I took it really hard. My parents wanted to get me another dog, but I refused. There was no way to replace Smuckers for me. So I haven't had or wanted a dog since, but then Hal brought Diddy over for us to puppysit for you and, my god, Bella, he looks and acts just like Smuckers did. He stinks just like Smuckers does too, and I feel like I have Smuckers back now and I feel like a kid again, so I was _hoping…_" Shane trailed off nervously showing me his clenched teeth.

My heart broke for Shane and Smuckers. What could I do? Of course I had to give Diddy to Shane. I looked to Edward. I was sure he knew what I was thinking. It was the right thing to do. He smiled at me reassuringly and nodded ever so slightly. I looked at Hal. He had his fingers interlocked, shaking them almost like he was praying, and he was looking at me with wide eyes that were begging me to hand over ownership. I opened my mouth to respond, but Shane jumped back in before I could utter a sound.

"And we'll make it worth your while of course!" he said enthusiastically. He looked at Hal. "Hal rip up Bella's rent and deposit check."

Hal gave Shane a dirty look, "I already did." Then Hal looked at me and smiled, "Happy birthday, baby girl!"

I was appalled, "What? Hal! No! Absolutely not! Out of the question. Don't be ridiculous. I'll write you a new check." I was almost twitching I was so upset. How could he just tear up my check?

"No, don't _you_ be ridiculous. We don't want it. Your money is no good here so what do you think about that?" Hal said moving his head in circles as he responded. He even had one hand on his hip and the forefinger of his free hand waving.

Hmmph! I crossed my arms over my chest. I was really mad. "You know what I think of this?" I asked. And then as if right on cue, Diddy farted. Loud. "Yeah," I nodded and pointed at Diddy, "_That's_ what I think of this."

"Wait for it…" Edward warned ominously. And then the unpleasant smell hit us as we all wrinkled our noses in disgust. We all looked at each other's contorted faces and laughed.

"Shane, you do realize he does this all the time right?" Edward asked.

Shane nodded vehemently, "Yeah, just like Smuckers." Weird. He seemed _pleased_ that this dog would be polluting his air. Edward and I looked at each other and shrugged. Shane looked wistful. He must have been reminiscing about his old pet.

"Was he a good dog?" I asked Shane quietly.

He smiled, "With a name like Smuckers…Well, you know the line." I rolled my eyes but giggled nonetheless.

"You guys, of course you can have Diddy. But don't do anything for me. You've done far too much for me already," I said gesturing around the apartment.

"Bella, what's that?" Edward asked pointing to the picture of Eli I forgot I was still holding.

"Oh, I was going to tell you before all this happened," I said gesturing widely with my arms again, "I talked to my mom this morning. She called to wish me happy birthday and she told me that she and Phil are adopting Eli here." I showed everyone the picture. "I'm going to be a big sister!" I beamed.

Hal gasped and bent down to hug me again. Shane congratulated me as did Edward, and I told them everything that Renee told me about Eli and how I would get to meet him at Coley's wedding.

Just then there was another knock on my door. "Come in!" I bellowed for the second time this morning. The door swung open and in walked Alice, Coley, Jasper, Rose, and Emmett. Wow, it was turning into a real party in here.

"Happy birthday, Bella!" they all yelled in unison causing me to close my eyes and cringe. When I opened my eyes back up they were all gathered around the sofa where Shane, Edward, and I were sitting.

"Hey, who's that?" Coley asked pointing at Eli's picture. So I launched into another retelling of the conversation I had with Renee earlier. They were just as happy and impressed with Renee as I was.

"So we'll all get to meet him next month? That's so cool!" Alice sang. Then she gasped, "We should go shopping for him!"

"Oooh, yeah!" Coley, Rosalie, and Hal all agreed.

I quickly surveyed the freak show that was my group of girlfriends. "Um, please don't get Eli a kimono, and please don't freak him out right off the bat," I pleaded.

"Of course not," Coley said.

"We wouldn't think of it," Alice added.

"Yeah, our brand of crazy should be introduced in increments," Rosalie chimed in rationally.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Hal said stiffly, sounding miffed, to which I just shook my head.

"So what's going on, guys? And where's Chad?" I asked.

"We're here to take you out to brunch," Coley said. "And Chad had to leave. They have a series against the Padres so he's heading to San Diego. They were only here to make up for a rain out earlier in the season," Coley informed me. "He says happy birthday and sends his love though. He gave you an extra large helping of the usual." I smiled and nodded in satisfaction.

"What's the usual?" Emmett asked.

"Nothing," Coley and I said at the same time looking at Emmett, who now looked confused, as did Jasper, Shane, and Edward.

"Really and literally it's nothing. He doesn't get me anything," I informed them.

"Not since sophomore year in high school right before Bella moved. He got her flowers thinking they'd be nice, and to any normal person they would have been a fine gift, but not Bella. She got bent out of shape about it and sufficiently scared Chad to the point of never wanting to stir up her ire ever again so he decided then never to get her anything. _My gift to you is nothing_ he'd say," Coley recounted, and I noticed Jasper and Emmett each try to slyly hide a gift bag behind them.

"But you got her something," Jasper pointed out. True, Coley brought in a rather large box that she had placed on the counter in the kitchen.

Coley nodded, "Yep, that's because Bella doesn't scare me, _and_ it's an exercise in social graces. Learn to accept a gift," Coley said looking at me pointedly. I stuck my tongue out at her and she sighed. "This lesson's been going on for years."

"Anyway," I said in an attempt to move the conversation along.

"Anyway," Coley continued, "It's an espresso machine and steamer," she grinned. "Remember how we were wondering how those Starbucks baristas did it? That's how! And now we'll expect you to make Starbucks quality beverages here in your own home," she grinned.

I laughed. "That's actually a very cool gift! Thanks, Coley!" I grinned.

"Thank the gang," she told me. "It's from all of us, except Chad of course. I was designated." I quirked up an eyebrow and she clarified. "Designated scapegoat in case you got…you know, all Bella about the gift?"

I made a face, "Come on, I'm not that bad." I waved my hand at them all.

I heard snorts, chuckles, and _whatevers_ sprinkled throughout the room. "Alright, alright. You mentioned something about food earlier?"

"Yes, let's go," Alice said. "Hal and Shane, you two are welcome to join us."

"Thanks, but we're going to decorate Diddy's room upstairs and bond some more with our baby boy," Hal responded. He went to give all of us girls kisses. "Love 'em, love 'em, love 'em," he said to Alice, Coley, and Rose upon seeing their choice in footwear this morning. To me he remarked, "Until the captain is healed, I'll forgive the blatant fashion don't that is that boot." And he covered my eyes with his fingers as if I were appearing as an actual _Don't_ in _Glamour_ Magazine.

"Thanks," I retorted acidly.

"And Bella, thanks so much!" Shane gushed. He hugged me and kissed my cheek.

"You're welcome, Shane. I know Diddy's going to a good home. I mean, he'll have his own room plus a bunch of kimonos." Then Edward and I both were petting, scratching, and rubbing on Diddy. "Bye, Dids. You come visit us anytime, okay?" He responded with another fart. Edward and I made faces and turned our heads. "Wait for it…Ugh! My mouth was open slightly," I complained. Everyone else made faces as well.

"Bye, little nasty," Edward said. "I'll go crack a window and you go now."

Edward and I noticed the perplexed looks on all of our friends' faces. I reminded Hal that our little rent thing was far from over. He merely rolled his eyes. Hal and Shane told the guys goodbye and then left.

"We'll explain while we eat," I assured them. I then gave everyone a quick tour of my place since most hadn't seen it yet. Coley was especially impressed by Hal's decorating skills.

Jasper and Emmett set down the bags they were holding before we left. They had espresso beans, Chai tea, and soy milk in them. I smiled. I'd get to play Starbucks later. Emmett also had my Sunday paper. I contemplated for a moment on whether to bring it with us so I could see the LaLo article, but decided against it. LaLo could wait until no one else was around. We left it on the counter as well.

For breakfast slash brunch we went to a local hotspot, from what Liz and my friends told me. It was a Mom and Pop's place; we avoided big chain restaurants whenever possible, and they were famous for their omelets.

We talked some more about Coley's wedding. She went ahead and invited Rosalie and Emmett since they all hit it off so well this weekend. Emmett was excited to be rubbing elbows with pro athletes.

Coley would have to leave in a few hours so Alice and I decided we would drop her off at the airport. Alice was also going to accompany me, i.e. be my driver, to Forks to visit Charlie. Carlisle also wanted to check the captain. Edward felt badly he couldn't come, but he really had a ton of homework to do. I, in turn, felt badly because I'd kept him from doing it.

"I'm sorry," I apologized when the others were engaged in a random conversation. "I've been distracting you from your studies."

He had his hand over mine, rubbing soothing circles on the top of it with his thumb. "Don't apologize, love. I can handle it. Besides, you're the best kind of distraction there is. I wouldn't mind spending every night like that with you," he kissed my cheek and gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

I blushed a little as I recalled our first night of more together. "But you'll never become a doctor that way," I pointed out.

"But I'd be pretty satisfied," he said with a smirk. "And I think you would too, no?" he asked seductively and quietly right into my ear. I gave his hand a quick smack garnering a chuckle from Edward, and then refocused my attention on our friends and what they were talking about.

"What do you mean, Cinderella was lame?" Rosalie asked Coley.

"Uh-oh," I groaned. Everyone looked at me. "Don't get her started. Coley's got views on fairytales and Cinderella in particular." Coley looked at me like a was a traitor, so I added, "And your views are completely valid, Cole."

"Thanks, Bella," she smiled.

"Okay, now we need to know," Emmett demanded. I laughed. I wondered whether they would think Coley had a point, like I did, or if they'd think she was just nuts.

"Alright," Coley started. "In the Disney cartoon, don't you think the prince could have saved a lot of time and effort trying to find Cinderella if he weren't such an idiot while they were dancing and actually got to know her? I mean, they were dancing a long time. Sure they sang a little, but what the hell were they talking about? He should have gotten her digits, her address or the vicinity of her residence. I mean at the very least he should have gotten her name so then he wouldn't have to go searching for a needle in haystack trying to find the chick that fits the stupid shoe that, and this is an aside, somehow isn't affected by the midnight voodoo? He could have been like, _So let's go find my lady, Cinderella. She lives over there by that well or whatever._ And finally, if they fell in love during their mute dancing escapade, it shouldn't matter if her pretty dress turns to rags at midnight anyway should it?" She took a bite of her French toast as if to punctuate that last point.

I looked around the table at the stunned expressions of all my friends and giggled a little. They were processing what she said and then one by one, each began to nod.

"You're right. What the hell were they talking about all night?" Jasper wondered.

"Yeah," Alice and Rose agreed.

"Maybe," Emmett hypothesized, "_She _was playing all coy and coquettish. Maybe my boy the prince was trying to get to know the real her and Cinderella, being the little vixen she is, was just playing him for the night? Huh? Huh? Ever think about that, Coca-Coley?" He asked crossly. Apparently, he felt the need to defend his gender.

Coley looked surprised. "First of all, good nickname. Clever, Emmitation Crab." He began to smile smugly until he heard her nickname for him. "But, why would _she_ play _him_? So she can go back and live her bachelorette and swinging ways with her bitchy step-mom and nasty stepsisters? I don't think so. Her life sucked. Why would she want to go back to it? I think your boy the prince was too busy singing, being fancy, and trying to tap some fair maiden tail to get Cindy's 411."

"Aww, yeah. Fair maiden tail. Right you are, Colitis," Emmett acknowledged as if that should supercede getting Cinderella's information. Coley, meanwhile, let the new nickname go with just a roll of her eyes. Inflammation of the colon wasn't the most endearing nickname I didn't think, but maybe that was just me.

I laughed, "If Coley had it her way, Cinderella would have run away and gone backpacking through Europe or something."

Coley laughed and nodded, "Exactly." Then suddenly Coley stopped laughing. She had a curious look on her face. "Bella, do you know that man over there? He keeps looking at you." I looked in the direction that Coley pointed with her head. Indeed, it was a familiar face. I waved and the man came over.

"Swan, I thought that was you," said the booming voice.

"Hey, Gerald. How are you? These are my friends," I introduced all of them. "Guys, this is my editor, Gerald."

Gerald took an extra long look at Edward when I introduced him. I think he was trying to place the name. "Yes, Gerald, Edward is Mars."

"Ah, yes. You're a big hit, young man. And I like the format a lot, Bella, so let's not change it. Hey, the wife and my daughters really like your Lana Love article today. Funny yet helpful advice." I couldn't help but cringe. Crap! "Oh, yeah, you've been calling her LaLo right? Sorry about that." He thought I was cringing about being called Lana Love, well, I was sort of. "Oh, looks like our order's ready. It was nice meeting everyone. I'll talk to you soon, LaLo." Gerald pointed at me and clicked his tongue. Wow, he was only over here a matter of seconds and managed to completely blow my cover.

"Why'd he call you that, Bella?" Edward asked. "What's the matter?" I had my eyes closed and shook my head in disbelief.

"Wow, you're red, Bella," someone, I think it was Alice, pointed out. My eyes were still closed but the heat I felt in my face indicated I was at least crimson.

I slowly opened my eyes, already knowing that everyone was watching me. I sighed, "Alright. I have a confession to make. I have another article in the paper besides Mars and Venus. It's a stupid advice column that comes out every Sunday. I'm embarrassed to say, I'm Lana Love."

I watched them carefully. Edward and Emmett understood quicker than the others.

"Was that the whole _would you date a coworker_ thing?" Emmett asked. I nodded, and he suddenly got excited. "Did you use my advice?"

I laughed, "Parts, though we had the sort of the same conclusion. I used your advice about laying the groundwork."

"Nice! I want to see it," Emmett said.

"Me too," I heard from everyone else.

"Really?" I asked. "You guys are interested in the column?" It was crazy to me that they wanted to know more about the LaLo column.

"We're interested in everything you do, Bella," Edward said. "Or what's your alias? Lana Love?"

Everyone laughed including me. I made a face at the name though. "It's so artificial isn't it? Like out of an adult entertainment video. Yeah, I'm Lana Love: porn star and love guru."

**A/N So nothing too exciting. Diddy's got a new home. My Diddy is still at home, though, stinking it up. Just laying some groundwork, like Emmett said. hehe. So, if you're reading down here it means that you've Read, and I hope you Enjoyed it a bit. Now don't forget to Review. Thanks and happy holidays!**


	13. Smurfin' A! Afternoon Delight!

**A/N I own nothing, specifically, I don't own Twilight.**

**Well, I hope everyone enjoyed their holiday, whichever holiday you celebrate. Unfortunately, Santa didn't bring me Rob Pattinson like I asked. I'm sure it was just some sort of mix-up. Hey, who ended up with my Rob Pattinson anyway? I've got your slippers.**

**Here's the next chapter. Make sure you read the author's note at the end.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 14**

**BPoV**

Rosalie decided to come with Alice and me to drop Coley off at the airport. I was pretty sure they had been waiting all morning to ambush me once again. I got in the car and sat quietly waiting for the interrogation to begin. I felt all eyes on me as Alice started her Porsche.

"What?" I asked innocently.

I could almost hear their collective eyes rolling in their heads.

"Spill!" they commanded and then laughed.

"Brunch was fun. Thanks for taking me out," I smiled.

Leave it to Coley to cut to the chase. "Oh come on! Stop playing coy. We all know you've been uh…_deflowered_. The question is how did the ambassador do?" We all giggled like schoolgirls.

I made a face. "How do you _know_?" I asked.

They all three snorted, but Alice clarified, "Look at you. You're absolutely glowing. You've got the blissful aura of having had some good sex."

"Um, Alice, isn't it a little uncomfortable talking about sex when your brother is involved?"

She merely shrugged, "We're all adults. I wouldn't talk to him directly about it, but it's not uncomfortable to talk about it with you. I mean, Rosalie and I chat about it and there's zero weirdness. Edward's just another guy, just like Jazz and Emmett and Chad, for that matter, are just guys when it comes to girl talk between us." The other two girls nodded. I guess they were right. The other guys are like brothers to me and it wasn't too weird talking about them in this manner.

"Anyway, the _ambassador_?" Rosalie asked.

"The _ambassador_ represented very well for his people and the country of sex," I answered trying to keep my face as straight as possible as their eyes all lit up. "Satisfied?" I asked.

"Apparently not as satisfied as you are," Rosalie laughed causing the rest of us to erupt in laughter.

"Um, is three times in one night a normal thing?" I asked biting my lip.

"_THREE?_" they shouted and we all laughed again.

"I take that as a no then?" I chuckled.

"Wow! My boy Edward did represent didn't he? I'm surprised you're not chafing," Coley commented. "Happy birthday, LaLo!"

In the month leading up to Coley's wedding Edward and I had reviewed three more movies: _Four Christmases, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, and Valkyrie_. The latter two are movies I would never go to voluntarily, but since my job was to watch them, I had to set aside my prejudices, suck it up and go. At least Edward was with me even though he thought my biases against Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise were totally irrational. Hmmph. In his opinion. I thought my discrimination was completely justified.

"So you've been boycotting Brad Pitt because of Jennifer Aniston?" he asked in disbelief.

"Yep. I admit _Mr. and Mrs. Smith_ was a hot movie, but once I learned how he cheated on his wife, that did it. He's dead to me," I said in all seriousness. Edward quirked up an eyebrow, and I nodded my head once to underscore my comment.

"Wow," Edward mouthed, eyes wide.

My face softened a little. "I'll always appreciate him in _Legends of the Fall_ though," I smiled wistfully.

"Okay then. And Tom Cruise? You boycott him because of what he did to Nicole Kidman I take it?"

"Nope. My issues with Tom Cruise started way before that. I boycott him due to _Mission Impossible 2_. It was terrible. '_You just stay alive!' _" I mocked Tom Cruise's line from _MI2_ and then rolled my eyes and shook my head in disdain. It was ridiculous.

"I see you really feel strongly about these actors. Will you be able to judge their movies fairly?" Edward asked dubiously.

I shrugged, "Probably not, but I'll do the best I can."

"You don't have a problem with Vince Vaughn do you?" Edward had asked before we went to see _Four Christmases_.

"No, I think he's really funny. I loved him in _Swingers_ and _The Breakup_ and most his other movies actually, but I nearly went mad watching him in _Made_. I honestly didn't think I'd be able to finish that movie because he was so obnoxious."

Edward nodded in agreement. "Um, any other actors you have unfounded and irrational intolerances against?"

I sighed, "Well, just a few more: Brendan Frasier, I've just never been a fan. The same with Nick Cage, except in _Raising Arizona_, and Mel Gibson because _Braveheart_ was just too long. Oh, also Jim Carrey save for the _Truman Show_ and _Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind_. He just seems like he's trying too hard in everything else." Edward looked at me like I was crazy. "Oh, come on, Edward. Don't you have any prejudices against actors?"

He was thoughtful a moment. "Well, now that you mention it, I'm not a fan of Jodie Foster because her nostrils flare too much. It's kind of distracting. And so are Julia Roberts' lips."

I smiled, satisfied, "See? So don't judge me."

"Point taken, love." He leaned in to give me a quick kiss. "Oh, you know what? Hugh Grant."

"What about Hugh Grant?" I asked slightly appalled that he was about to insult Hugh. Edward made a face and shook his head. "He plays the same character in every film." I was about to defend Hugh Grant when Edward added, "And Colin Firth…"

I gasped. Oh hell no! "Uh, stop right there. Do not even _think_ about trash talking Mr. Darcy!"

We stared each other down. Edward was clearly taken aback by allegiance to Colin Firth. I mean come on. What's not to love about him?

"But…"

"Zip-zip," I said curtly holding my finger up at him.

"He's so…"

"Nuh-uh. Zip," I repeated giving Edward a severe look and placing my finger over his lips this time.

"Wow!" he mouthed again in mock horror but then kissed my finger.

We had also reviewed a book, _A Walk in the Woods_, by Bill Bryson. It wasn't a new book, but for whatever reason, Gerald had it on the list he gave me. It was pretty easy for us to review since Edward had already read and enjoyed it, and it was a quick read for me. Bill Bryson was very amusing.

The Mars and Venus column still seemed to be a hit. Some of the readers wanted us to post pictures of ourselves in the column. Actually, I suspected all they really wanted was to see what Edward looked like. I couldn't blame them to want a picture to go with the dialogue, but if we were to put his picture up, I was quite certain we'd be inundated with even more emails from women asking Edward out.

Edward was disinterested in most of the emails reviewing Mars and Venus, but he did find one rather amusing. A reader had suggested that Mars and Venus go out on a real date since we seemed so compatible.

"Finally a reasonable response," he said, his breath tickled my skin but I leaned in toward him anyway. Edward kissed my neck while closing my laptop, and soon I was disinterested in the emails as well…

Which brings us to _more_. It had been amazing. How can sex with Edward be anything less than that? In the history of ambassadorships, Edward took the cake as the sweetest, kindest, most skilled ambassador ever. Granted, I didn't have any other representative to compare him to, but by my girlfriends' reactions to the three-peat, I'd say Edward was top-notch. Of course it was unrealistic to expect a night like our first night together all the time, but I could say that Edward had never disappointed. And from what I could surmise, I must not have been as disappointing as I feared either since it seemed that we couldn't get enough of each other. If it weren't for school, work, or social obligations, I didn't think we'd leave my apartment or his. We'd taken to switching apartments every other night to keep things equal I guess. It didn't matter which apartment we were in. It was fine by me as long as we were together.

On Friday evenings we would all get together to have dinner, rotating venues, but the Friday before Coley's wedding we'd be in Phoenix so we planned on getting together at my place that Thursday instead. We hung out to spend time together, of course, but my friends also wanted to help me with letters to LaLo. It was beyond me why they were interested though. Perhaps it was just fascinating hearing about other people's relationship problems, or perhaps talking about possible advice options was therapeutic for all of us in our own relationships. Also, we would come across the occasional smutty letter asking about sex. I would never print these letters in the paper, of course, but they were still fun to read and discuss.

That Thursday Emmett was exceptionally bored and ended up coming over to my place early. He had called me three times prior.

"What is it now Emmett?" I asked with apparent irritation in my voice. Since I'd been outed as Lana Love he'd been calling me randomly asking for stupid advice. He'd already asked if he should have Cap'N Crunch or Corn Pops for breakfast. After that he asked if he should have sugar or Splenda in his coffee. He had over generalized the scope of my alleged expertise to include advice on anything and everything rather than specifically love and relationships.

"Hey, Bell-LaLo," I rolled my eyes at the name once again. At least my girlfriends were just occasionally calling me LaLo, but leave it to Emmett to take it one step further. "Nothing. I just wanted to do a random Bell-LaLo check. You know, because it's amusing to call you Bell-LaLo." He chuckled to himself.

"Emmett, why don't you just text me to do the random _Bell-LaLo_ checks?" I asked.

He laughed again, "Because I can't hear the exasperation when you text me back. That's half the fun. Also, it's too easy for you to just not text back. This way I can keep ringing you until you answer."

I sighed, "You know, I could ignore your calls or just block them all together. Don't you have to be at school or something?" It was a Thursday for the love of god, and he had called me twice already.

"Nope, tomorrow's conferences, which I don't have because I talked to parents at open house plus I just sent letters home with progress reports and today's teachers' institute. I took a personal day so I wouldn't have to sit through boring workshops at school like those other suckers."

"_Suckers_. You mean your colleagues," I clarified.

"Yep, them. So now I have a long weekend to enjoy."

"So you'd rather harass me than attend workshops to better yourself as a teacher?"

"Absolutely. Also, I wanted to see if you needed any help with the advice column." Emmett especially found it was cool to see part of what he said about dipping your pen in the company ink in print. It was even cooler to see that I cited him as a source even if I didn't use his real name. I referred to Emmett by using the initial M. I thought that was pretty close to the real thing: Big Em.

I guess Edward was right. It was natural to like to see your own name, even an initial, in print. "Well, Emmett, you are clearly bored, but if you want to come over, we can sift through some of these letters together. Edward will be home soon from class. He's stopping by the deli for some lunch. If you want anything you should text him. Or better yet, why don't you surprise Rosalie by taking her out to lunch and then you can come over here afterwards?"

He thought a moment like the idea of randomly taking his wife out for lunch had never occurred to him. "Excellent idea. Hey, thanks Bell-LaLo. And I didn't even have to ask for the advice. I think Bell-LaLo mode is on autopilot what do you think?"

I just shook my head even though he couldn't see me, "I'll see you later, Emmett."

Edward arrived shortly after I hung up with Emmett. He brought me my usual from the deli and we ate and talked about his class. Luckily, he only had lecture that day so I didn't have to stomach any autopsy or cadaver lab talk. Though, I have to say my stomach was getting stronger, and I was not as queasy about discussing the topic of hacking up dead bodies while we ate.

When Emmett arrived we wasted much time playing with the espresso machine. I was getting pretty good at making my soy chai lattes, but since that was my favorite drink, I hadn't really put forth much effort into making anything else. Emmett, on the other hand, was like a pro. He brought over a variety of syrups and beverage concentrates; it looked like he just robbed a coffee shop really. He made café au lait for Edward and a double dirty mocha for himself. Edward and I looked on in awe. Emmett was quite impressive.

"Wow, Emmett. How'd you learn to do that?" I asked.

He grinned, "I don't just stand around picking my nose when I wait for my drinks at Starbucks, Bell-LaLo, I do a lot of reconnaissance."

"So do you take notes when you're watching them make drinks?" Edward asked.

"Nope. It's all up here, little bro," Emmett smiled smugly while tapping his temple.

"Oh. Very good. You've been observing them well, but that's a bit of a dainty drink for you isn't it? I would have thought you'd just do black coffee or espresso shots straight," I giggled at my own stereotypes.

"Uh-uh. Mocha's are the best, and they _can_ be a bit dainty, but that's why I made it double dirty with the two shots of espresso."

"Ah, it machos the drink up? Gives it more street cred?" I laughed.

Emmett messed around and made some random lattes. Edward and I were already full from lunch as well as our own drinks so I took them upstairs to Hal and Shane. They were in a frenzy over what to pack for Coley's wedding plus they were trying to get Shane's brother to puppy sit Diddy for the weekend. Shane didn't want to leave Diddy, but he didn't want to miss the wedding either. He found solace in the fact that they'd only be gone for two days since they were flying to Phoenix on Saturday morning while the rest of us were leaving on Friday morning. We'd all be coming back on Sunday afternoon.

When I got back down to my place, I was pleasantly surprised to see the rest of the gang there. Everyone had cut out of work a little early to get ready for the trip. Emmett had graciously whipped up lattes for Rosalie, Alice and Jasper as well as another for me, which I took happily. He had a real future as a barista if he ever got tired of coaching and teaching. Perhaps a summer job at Starbucks?

Once everyone had their drinks, we settled into the living room. They, as usual, got excited when I was about to go through the letters. This was a really fun activity for us even though it was admittedly nerdy, but who cared? We all bonded through our LaLo sessions. I was thankful for these sessions since because of them I was three weeks ahead on LaLo articles.

"Anything good this week, Bella?" Alice asked.

"I think so. I've got couple interesting letters here. The first one is from a guy who calls himself _On Bended Knee_. It's about whether to ask his intended fiancé's father beforehand for his daughter's hand in marriage." I looked around. "Pro or con?"

"I think it's a nice idea," Edward answered. I looked up at him next to me and smiled. "It's old fashioned yes, but it's respectful as well. Pro," Edward concluded.

Jasper agreed, "Pro. As long as her dad doesn't hate him or anything."

I looked again at the letter. There wasn't anything indicating a bad relationship with the would-be father-in-law.

I nodded, "I like that idea as well. It's sweet. Pro."

Emmett made a face, "Eh," he waved me off with his hand. "What century is this? He doesn't need Dad's permission. Be a man. Take control. Big fat con." And he blew a raspberry to emphasize his opinion.

Rosalie agreed with Emmett, "Yeah, it so is not necessary. Just propose already! Con."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but Emmett is right," Alice said. "It was bound to happen some time right? Con."

"Wow. That was interesting," I commented as I took notes. "Okay here's the next one. It's from another guy. Wow, I've got guys asking for relationship advice. I thought it'd be all women. Anyway, he signs it _RB34_. _RB34_ writes:

_**Lana,**_

_**My wife and I have been together since college, eight years now and married for five. We just had twins, and my mom's still cold towards my wife. This dislike is irrational and unfounded. Mom loves the twins but still puts down my wife, who is otherwise liked by pretty much everyone she comes in contact with. The twins are still too young to understand the animosity. Luckily, we have a tight knit group of friends and family other than my mom. My wife is a very strong person and doesn't let my mother get to her, but I know it still hurts her to some extent. I've tried reaching out to my mom in the past but to no avail. Should I just give up? What the smurf should I do?**_

"Aww, I feel bad for him and his wife," I said. "His mom sounds like a real piece of work."

"She's a real piece of something," Rosalie mused.

"What a bitch," Alice snarled. "I think the mom needs to be thrown in a vat of acid." Rose and I nodded our heads in agreement.

"I think he should try at least once more to see what his mom's problem is, and if she's still a bitch then give up," Jasper said.

I looked at Edward. He was thoughtful a moment but ultimately agreed with Jasper, "Yes, he should try again even though they probably don't need her support, it's nice to have everyone getting along especially when there are kids involved."

Even though I didn't really get a good feeling about the mother-in-law, Jasper and Edward were probably right, though the vat of acid sounded like a splendid idea for this woman.

Finally, we all looked to Emmett, "I like the vat of acid idea, sis." Emmett high-fived Alice. "But who the hell uses the word _smurf_? I'd call him a tool if I didn't feel bad for him."

"Hey, don't call my readers tools, Emmett," I warned. "And FYI, _smurf _is an all-purpose, universal term used to mean whatever you want it to mean so smurf the smurf up." I had to defend my audience though I wasn't doing it with the straight face I intended to maintain. Something about the word smurf made me smile.

"Don't smurf me what to smurf, Bell-LaLo Smurf," Emmett laughed. Uh-oh, it was on now. I glared at him murderously pretending to be pissed. He saw through it. "Oooh, I'm smurfing in my boots."

"Ex-smurf me? I'll smurf you into next smurf, you…smurfin'…smurf," I choked out. Then I made a face. "I think I lost track of my smurfs. Did that smurf sense?" I looked at Edward.

He nodded, "Abso-smurfly. But I think you two have had a _smurf_ too much caffeine," he pointed out grinning at me.

"Yeah, cut them the smurf off," Rosalie chimed in. Alice and Jasper were in hysterics and unable to put in their two cents. Thank goodness. This was already getting out of hand.

Everyone left shortly after the smurf incident to run errands and pack for Phoenix. We were all going to meet up at the airport in the morning.

It didn't take Edward and me very long to pack. Coley already had Alice's and my bridesmaid dresses. Plus, Coley told me she had something picked out for me for the rehearsal dinner as well. All I needed to pack were jeans, a couple casual tops, underwear, and pajamas. Carlisle even let me out of the boot a little early as long as I wore comfortable shoes, read no high heels or shoes that squished the captain. Not a problem. All I needed were my toothbrush and deodorant since I could bank on Alice or Rose doing my makeup. Anything else I needed, the hotel would have.

I had plenty of room in my suitcase for Eli's present, a leather bound journal that he could sketch in as well. Edward and I had talked to him a couple times on the phone and he'd told us how he liked to read, write, and draw. Edward and I planned on taking him to the bookstore as well while we were down there. We were so excited to meet Eli. He was so sweet too. He was only eight, but he had this really deep voice like he had a frog in his throat.

Once I finished packing, I curled up on my couch ready for a nap. I had just drifted off when I heard Edward come in. I opened my eyes to see him staring down at me.

"Sorry. Did I wake you?" He leaned down and kissed my forehead.

"No," I lied groggily. He chuckled seeing through my words and then kissed my lips upside down, _Spiderman_ style.

"Mmm," was all I could utter into Edward's mouth. If I weren't coherent before, that kiss certainly woke me up. I wrapped my fingers around his hair to hold his face close to my own. He kept his mouth on mine without breaking the kiss as he spun his body around and got on the couch so that he was no longer standing but lying down pressed against me. His lips were no longer upside down on mine but flush to mine right side up and moving with fervor and purpose.

Just as I thought I was going to pass out from lack of oxygen, Edward pulled away and set to work kissing my neck and nuzzling me ear so I could take a proper breath. "Did you still want to nap, love?" he asked between kisses.

I smiled. Like he didn't know the answer to that. There was nothing wrong with a little afternoon delight.

**A/N So, this is where I'll leave off this chapter. Hope you enjoyed the references to Saving Me and the Sequel, for those in the know. And I know Rylan most likely would not write to a paper asking for advice, but I wanted to worm the V of A in there somehow. Now, this chapter can stand alone this way, but there is a lemon outtake for those interested. I know some readers don't want the lemon so I'm experimenting here. For my regular reviewers, as you can see, I went ahead and pmed the lemon outtake to you. Everyone else, if you are interested in reading the outtake, you'll have to review and let me know that you want it. I will in turn pm it to you. Deal? Deal. Thanks. REAR please.**

**12-30-08 I actually decided to post the outtake, so if you don't want to read a lemon, move along. If you want some lemonade, drink up and enjoy:**

**Smurfin' A! Afternoon Delight Chp 14 outtake**

**Edward didn't even wait for my verbal response. My body arching up to meet his gave him my answer to his question. His hand already made its way up to cup my breast. I sat up slowly, and Edward moved with me removing my top as we shifted positions. He threw my shirt to the side and then I slid his tee up and over his head. It too was discarded followed by our jeans as we shifted to a standing position. Edward's mouth never left mine as we both stepped out of our pants. We then pushed each other's underwear down as far as we could then each took over the remainder of the removal ourselves. Edward nimbly unhooked my bra and tossed it aside while I stroked and massaged him.**

**His hands, in turn, were exploring the newly exposed skin, squeezing and kneading, pinching and rolling until I felt one hand settle on my left butt cheek and another between my legs softly touching, almost tickling my bare folds already wet with want for him.**

"**Edward," I moaned. "Please." My knees were giving out as I slid to the carpet, Edward caught me before I hit the floor and instead of falling on top of me he somehow managed to roll so that he was now under me, cushioning me. I could feel his arousal against my stomach so I sat up to straddle him while continuing to massage the boys eliciting a moan out of Edward. That sound out of Edward was so sexy and encouraging. It aroused me to point where my body dripped and ached for him to complete me.**

"**Isabella, I need you," he murmured as he kneaded my breasts.**

**I shifted my body so that his erection was positioned at my entrance. I hovered above Edward as I lowered myself onto him little by little, teasing and tempting him while he eagerly took my breast in his warm mouth, his hands moving to my bottom, cupping my cheeks. The feel of his hot tongue on my hard yet sensitive peak set my body on fire, and the way he softly bit down each time I would tease the tip of his shaft nearly threw me over the edge.**

**Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I needed to feel Edward inside of me so I lowered myself onto him completely and set the pace, which he quickly met, bucking his hips against mine. I squeezed him each time he thrust into me. Soon though, I noticed Edward was slowing down as he was attempting to sit up while remaining inside me. His arms did most of the work as he sat up, back against the couch, legs stretched out and I was kneeling in his lap. I was able to really control the rhythm and he was able to penetrate even deeper.**

**I arched my torso throwing my breasts forward into Edward's face. My head and neck extended back as I succumbed to the ecstasy and pleasure. As I felt Edwards mouth once again on my breast, my entire body trembled as my walls clamped around Edward sending us both into oblivion. I came first, moaning Edward's name and god in the same breath. And as soon as I climaxed I heard Edward grunt and I could feel his release inside me.**

**I leaned my forehead against his and allowed our sweat glistened bodies to rest against each other's. I clenched my core around him in thanks for round one, knowing very well that a nice hot shower was in our immediate future as was round two. Mmm, yes, afternoon delight.**

**REAR please.**


	14. Wham Bam Thank you, Ma'am

**A/N I am merely borrowing Steph Meyer's characters and making up a few of my own.**

**So, I went ahead and added the lemon to the end of the last chapter so go back and read it if you're interested. Someone left me an anonymous review and asked for the lemon, only I had no way to respond, BIA. **

**Anyhoo, I have a random question. I was thinking about how they're going to be shooting New Moon soon and Aro came to mind. I thought these vampires, especially the Italian ones, were supposed to be beautiful and when I think of Aro I picture an old guy with papery skin, but that doesn't jive with what we know about Steph Meyer's vampires. What do you guys think?**

**Okay, that's all. Here's the next chapter. REAR please.**

**Can't Let Go **

**Chp 15**

**BPoV**

The flight to Phoenix was smooth and uneventful, which is always nice when you're talking about air travel. We all had seats pretty close together. Not that we did much talking on the plane. Each couple was in their own little bubble, listening to their iPod or reading. Alice flipped through a French Vogue while I noticed Rosalie was reading a vampire book. She said it was the opposite of our vampire romance books. It was vampire smut. I have to admit, I was a little intrigued. I'll borrow it from her when she's done. Rose said it was funny despite the cheesy cover picture. The main character has a funny name, Sookie Stackhouse, and she can read minds but she's not a vampire. And the vampire that she likes, she can't read _his _mind. Hmm. Interesting.

I was watching _Bridget Jones Diary _on my iPod, cracking up at the part where Hugh Grant and Colin Firth are fighting out in the street, when I felt Edward nudge me. I thought I was laughing too loudly or something but he pulled the earbud out of my right ear and replaced it with his left earbud. I looked at him and smiled at what he wanted me to listen to with him. It was Jimmy Eat World's _23_. A blush crept over my face when Edward winked at me. That song brought back very pleasant memories. Edward put his arm around me and I leaned into him, resting my head against his chest, enjoying the moment.

Chad and Coley met us at baggage claim and took us to the hotel. They both had SUVs so we were all able to fit in two vehicles. Chad is a complete gear head and owns quite a few cars so they loaned us these two cars for the weekend that way we wouldn't have to rent. Once we checked in and took our luggage to our room, Edward and I drove Chad and Coley back to their house while Emmett drove the other car over with Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper. There was a pool at the resort, but Coley insisted we go over to their place and hang out a while before the rehearsal dinner, and if we wanted to swim, we could use their pool.

On the way there, Coley asked when my mom, Phil, and Eli would be arriving.

"She told me their flight isn't getting in until five this evening," I answered. That would give us three hours. "Edward and I were going to pick them up on the way to the rehearsal tonight. In fact, I brought Eli's present with me."

Coley merely nodded. I noticed she had the smallest hint of a smile though. I think she was as excited as I was to see Renee as well as meet Eli.

We soon pulled up to their house and parked in the circle drive in front. Their home was about halfway up one of the mountains and had a spectacular view of the Phoenix area, though they technically lived in Scottsdale.

"Hey, Chad, do you still have the Beast?" I asked as we got out of the car. I was expecting him to say no.

Coley and he both laughed, "Of course I do. She's taking up a corner of my garage. You should think about donating her to a car museum," he added the last part facetiously.

"Har har," I retorted. "I just want to visit her," I sighed wistfully.

"Are we talking about your big red truck, Bella?" Emmett asked.

I smiled nodding, "The very one." I sighed again, "I miss her."

Everyone looked at me like I was crazy, which perhaps I was.

"But you have such a nice, reliable ride now," Edward commented.

"Yeah, but the Beast had so much character," I mused.

"By _character_, do you mean rust?" Coley joked, eliciting chuckles from the guys. I just stuck my tongue out at her.

We went inside. Their house was just the same as it was when I was here over a month ago. Rose and Alice both wanted a tour, and I said I'd give them one but Coley suggested we all go out by the pool for refreshments first.

As we were approaching the back deck, we heard splashing and laughing from outside. I wondered who was out there. Coley and Chad lived there alone except for the cleaning lady who comes once a week. But I doubted the cleaning lady would be splashing around in their pool.

I gasped when I discovered who was out there. Coley and Chad both laughed at my reaction as I ran toward the sliding glass door only bumping my elbow into the corner of the island on the way. "Ow!" I rubbed my elbow but otherwise ignored the initial throbbing as well as the laughter from my friends. I slid the glass door open and screamed, "Mom! Phil!"

They both looked up at me and grinned from the pool. I noticed Eli there with them, and mom whispered something to him.

Eli smiled and waved tentatively at me. Everyone else was standing around me and waving to my family as well. I wanted to run down to them, but I suspiciously eyed the stairs in front of me, wondering how I could negotiate them quickly without killing myself.

Edward must have read my mind or else is just very well versed in my clumsy ways. But I also heard Coley say quietly, "Help her please. I don't want to be down one MOH." Edward held his elbow out for me to hook my arm through and together we went down the stairs.

By the time we were poolside, Renee, Phil, and Eli were all out of the pool. I heaved myself at my mom hugging her, not giving any thought to the fact that she was soaking wet and now I was too.

"How are you, baby? You look great. We've missed you!" she beamed.

"I've missed you too, Mom," I said. Then I hugged Phil while Edward formally introduced himself to Renee and then Phil. They had met once before, but that was a long time ago.

Renee hugged Edward while Phil shook Edward's hand. They exchanged pleasantries, and Mom informed us that they had arrived about three hours ago. These people just love to surprise me don't they?

"And this," Renee announced placing her hands on the little boy's shoulders, "is Eli!"

I crouched down so I could be at his eye level. "Hi, Eli," I stuck my hand out. "I'm Bella. It's good to meet you face to face."

Eli took my hand and then surprised me by giving me a hug. "Hi, Bella," he said with his deep voice.

Aww! I almost cried. I squeezed Eli a little tighter, "I'm happy to meet you, Eli. We're going to have so much fun." He was adorable.

We broke from the hug and I noticed everyone was quiet around us, giving us our little moment together. I looked up to see Edward smiling down at Eli and me.

"Eli, this is Edward." Edward crouched down as well and shook Eli's little hand.

"It's good to finally meet you, Eli," Edward said. Eli smiled as he shook Edward's hand; he was missing a front tooth. How cute.

"Hey, family picture," I heard Coley yell. We all looked up and saw that she had her camera ready. I'm not usually a fan of posing for pictures, but I thought this would be a nice one what with the addition of Eli. I stood next to my mom who had Phil next to her, and Eli was in front of them. Edward was about to step aside, but Renee caught his arm and pulled him back to stand on the other side of me. We exchanged a quick glance and shrug, Edward and I. Edward put his arm around me, and then we smiled for the picture. Alice and Rosalie snapped pictures with their phones as well promising to send them to our phones so we could have a copy.

Everyone else joined us after that, and I made all the introductions. All my friends were on their best behavior so as not to frighten Eli, which I was grateful for. That's not to say we didn't have fun. Coley has an espresso machine as well so Emmett, of course, set to work making drinks for everyone. Mom and Eli were as impressed with Emmett as Edward and I were.

Edward and I gave Eli his journal. The way Eli's eyes lit up was priceless. He really appreciated the gift. He was eager to draw in it.

Coley and Chad presented Eli with a baseball signed by the Diamondbacks players since he was keen on sports. Eli definitely was excited about that, as was Emmett.

"Wow. Nice. You know Eli, I could keep that safe for you," he commented casually earning him a swat on the arm from Rosalie and reproachful gasps from Alice and me. "_What?_ I'm just saying. I could," he shrugged. Edward and Jasper shook their heads at Emmett while everyone else, including Eli, was laughing. Eli was gracious enough, however, to let Emmett hold the ball to get a closer look at it.

After that, the guys hung out with Eli while Coley and I gave a tour of her house to Renee, Rose, and Alice.

"Aww, Mom, Eli is so great!" I gushed once we were out of earshot of the guys. My girlfriends all agreed. "I'm so happy for you guys."

"I know," she beamed. "He's so sweet and polite. But don't let that fool you. He's got a ton of energy. We love to go to the park. And once he's comfortable around you, he'll talk your ear off. We just love to hear him go on and on about what happened at school or describe what he's drawing."

"I can't wait to hang out with him," I smiled.

"And Edward and you seem to be getting on just spectacularly," Renee observed. "I loved the way he helped you down the stairs. I have to admit, for a spilt second there I envisioned you tumbling down those steps, hitting your head, and rolling into the pool."

I made an angry grunting sound but then relaxed my face in concession, "Yeah, that sounds like me." My faithful friends nodded in agreement.

So Coley briefed us on the schedule for the weekend. Alice, Jasper, Edward and I would all be at the church with the rest of the wedding party for the rehearsal and then we'd all meet at the restaurant at the resort we were staying at for the dinner, which was nice and convenient for us. The next day, we'd all get ready for the wedding at the resort as well in a room Coley reserved for the bridal party, which included only one other woman besides Alice and me. Chad's cousin Fiona is the other bridesmaid. Then we'd head over to the church together. And then back in the limo for the reception, also at the resort. Coley was making it as easy as possible for her out of town guests.

Neither Edward nor Jasper needed to be at the rehearsal, but they wanted to be with us. Also, Edward wanted to check out Drew I think. So we four had taken one of the cars to the church while Emmett drove Rosalie, Renee, Phil, and Eli back to the hotel.

It was so weird to see him jealous. Edward's so confident usually. I guess I should be flattered by his jealousy, but really I wanted him to just get over it. Nothing ever happened with Drew and Edward and I were together now. Of course, Edward denies being jealous. He insists that he just wants to meet more ball players if only to make Emmett jealous, but whatever helps him sleep at night.

I never grilled Edward about his past. I mean, I know about Tanya. I don't know how serious he was with her since it all happened at the end of our senior year and I left for Arizona as soon as humanly possible. I never asked Alice about them, and she never offered up any unsolicited information. I only knew that Edward and Tanya had broken up when I went back to Forks during part of my Christmas break my freshman year at ASU. I attended Esme's Christmas party and noticed that Tanya wasn't there. I had asked Alice where Tanya was and she shrugged answering, "Don't know. Probably with her new man."

For the next three Christmas parties, I noticed Edward had a date for the first two, but not last year. Edward and I would only speak briefly, just long enough to ask how our families were doing and how classes were going. While it wasn't impossible to be around him, I still didn't want to get involved in lengthy conversations with Edward since I'd still feel pangs of regret whenever I saw him.

While Edward would freely ask me about Drew or other guys I went on dates with, he was careful never to ask me about our past or what happened to our friendship leading up to high school graduation. Not that I minded, it was just a topic I noted that he'd never bring up.

So the rehearsal didn't take too long. Coley wanted a short and simple ceremony. It was mostly just a formality to appease her parents really. If she had it her way, they'd have eloped to Vegas and just thrown a huge reception party once they got back.

Jasper and Edward sat in one of the pews waiting and watching while the wedding party practiced walking the procession. Fortunately for me, it wasn't a very long aisle. Chad and I chit chatted easily. He was a really nice guy. He was still single though and he asked me if I was too. I told him about Edward and pointed Edward out to him as we walked together down the aisle during the rehearsal. Edward smiled when I waved to him as we approached his pew. He seemed to not even see Drew next to me until Drew leaned toward me and commented, "He seems like a nice guy," while eyeing Edward.

I grinned, "He's the best," I said mostly to myself.

"So your friend Alice is spoken for as well?" Drew asked when we were about to take our respective spots on either side of the alter. I was still grinning and nodded as we parted. Drew rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Man, did Coley invite any single ladies here or what?" he asked feigning annoyance. I just giggled. Maybe he'd luck out with Fiona. I heard she's still single, which is what I told Drew on the trip back up the aisle.

The rehearsal went on without a hitch and Edward and Jasper met us outside the church when it was all done so we could head over to the dinner party. I introduced Drew to Edward and Jasper, and they all shook hands amicably.

We had about half an hour until the dinner was to begin so we all headed up to our rooms for a bit beforehand.

"Have I told you how lovely you look this evening, love" Edward asked as we entered our room. He ushered me in with his hand on the small of my back, which slipped down a little lower once we were inside and the door closed behind us. The heat from his hand felt nice as he pulled me closer to him and kissed me.

"Mmm," I murmured as we broke the kiss. "Yes, actually, but it's still nice to hear."

"You look lovely," he whispered in my ear before nuzzling the lobe and then trailing kisses down my neck.

"Edward," I warned, albeit not very forcefully. "We have to go down in a minute."

"My thought exactly," he smiled against my throat.

I laughed at the innuendo, "What's brought all this on?" I asked pushing against his chest causing Edward to moan as he grudgingly backed off a little. It's not that I didn't want more, but my god, if we got started, I don't think we'd be able to tear ourselves away from our room in time for dinner, and that's just not socially acceptable. Edward realized this too.

He sighed as he held me at arm's length, "Later then," he promised. I giggled at his slightly pouty expression. "There's that giggle again," he commented.

"What?" I asked tilting my head curiously at him.

"You did quite a bit of giggling and grinning earlier tonight with Drew the pitcher. He must have been very amusing."

I smiled at how silly Edward was being, "Yes, he was amusing. He was annoyed that the bridesmaids were all spoken for until I told him that Fiona was still single."

"Ah," Edward nodded.

"And you're amusing when you're pretending to not be jealous," I chuckled, tapping the end of his nose. He rolled his eyes and I was sure he was about to argue how he's not jealous, but I decided to ask him about his history for a change. "Hey, Edward," I asked tentatively, not sure I really wanted to know the answer but thought I'd flip the script for once. "How many women have you been with?" Heat suddenly filled my face.

"What do you mean by _been with_?" he hedged, also tentatively.

I made a face, "You know what I mean, Edward."

I was an arm's length away still, but he pulled me closer, kissing the top of my head. "I didn't think you wanted to hear all the gory details."

I began to pull away not wanting to look at him, "Are there many gory details then?" I asked his forearm quietly. My face felt warmer still as I flushed even more crimson and braced myself for an outrageous number.

Edward cupped my chin and gently lifted my gaze to his, only my eyes were closed. I felt him shake with laughter. Great he was laughing at me. I pursed my lips, irked that he was making fun of me, but Edward captured my lips with his for a chaste kiss and whispered the number one in my ear.

My eyes popped open in surprise, and I pulled back to look at him.

"One?"

"One."

"Tanya?"

"No. Bella."

"Stop lying," I ordered.

He laughed, "I'm not lying. Why do you assume I'm lying?"

I scrunched my eyebrows together and looked at Edward, searching his eyes for any sign of joking. I couldn't find any. He simply looked back at me, not blinking.

"Oh, I bet you just assumed I'm a man-whore because I'm a guy?" he asked pretending to be indignant, but there was a slight twinkle in his eye now.

I thought about that for a moment. "Well, yes, but not so much a man-whore but a mimbo. And also because you're so attractive and… skilled," I said.

"I could say the same about you," he countered. I rolled my eyes. "I can," he laughed.

"But…where'd you learn to…" this was a bit embarrassing, "you know, do what you do?"

He laughed again, "The same way you learned to do what _you_ do."

We stared at each other for an immeasurable moment. I eyed him suspiciously while he peered back at me, hilarity evident in his expression.

"From my girlfriends?" I asked. Edward chuckled at my response.

"I'm glad I amuse you," I said finally. Edward, still grinning, leaned down to kiss me. And I thought again about how skilled he is. I mean I only had a grasp of the theory of _more_ and I guess Edward did too. _Huh, _I thought. Well, I thought that I thought it. I must've verbalized it.

"What?" Edward asked, and I realized I said that aloud.

I shrugged, "You're a very good student," I commented.

Edward gave me a strange look, probably wondering why I would bring up school. "Thanks?"

I noticed the time and tugged on his hand. "Come on. We should go down now." Edward snickered so I clarified. "Downstairs? We have to go _downstairs_."

"I know that," he said with a wink. Whatever. I shook my head as we got in the elevator. I was still studying Edward in silence. "What?" he asked.

I shook my head. "So you and Tanya?"

Edward sighed, "No, Bella. You still don't believe me?"

"No, I believe you, it's just hard to believe."

"She wanted to, but I didn't," he shrugged. "I wanted to wait…for the right person I guess." He looked at me and smiled, "Cue the laughter."

"I'm not laughing," I said seriously. Why would I laugh at that? "But I'm sorry I assumed, Edward. I should know better. You know what they say about when you assume," I looked at Edward apologetically.

"That's all right, love. I could have been more forth coming about it, but it just didn't matter. And then you went on about tricks which piqued my curiosity." I blushed thinking back to that humiliating conversation about _more_. He was right. I really just assumed he was way more experienced than I. I didn't even give him the chance then to talk about his experience, and I know I didn't want to hear about it. "Anyway, I'd date occasionally, when I felt I needed to have a date, like at my parents' Christmas parties, but mostly I've been too busy with school. Then a certain brunette came back to town and captured all of my attention," he placed his hands on my face and kissed me again. I wanted the moment to last, but soon the elevator door opened and we had to exit.

We went into the restaurant and took our seats in a reserved room. I gave Edward one more peck on the cheek, "I love you," I whispered.

"And I you, love."

The dinner was really good, and it was fun to sit with my mom, Phil, and Eli. That was nice of Coley to invite them to dinner with us so we could spend a little more time together. Eli was opening up a little more to us, talking about his favorite subjects in school and how he wants to be a policeman when he grows up. I told him about Charlie being the chief of police and asked if he'd like to visit us some time. Eli seemed excited about that.

Dinner lasted a couple hours. Coley showed the bridesmaids the room where we'd get our hair and makeup done in and presented us with out bridesmaids' gifts.

She gave us three each a tennis bracelet, made of white gold and diamonds. It was too extravagant, and I wanted to give it back, but, of course, Coley refused. She also gave us lingerie. Apparently, Fiona designs it and Coley supported her cousin-in-law's cause. Alice was very pleased to get new drawers. I have to admit, it was very pretty. It was a matching bra and thong set. Yeah, I don't so much do thongs, but I smiled graciously anyway. This was supposed to go with our dresses for the wedding.

Afterwards, I met Edward and Eli in the lobby so we could take him to a bookstore. I had Alice drop off my gifts in Edward's and my room.

We took Eli to the bookstore and hung out there for quite a while. Aside from sports, he's interested in space, cars, and animals so we got Eli a number of books on those subjects. And interestingly enough, a Smurf book caught his eye so of course we got that for him too. After the bookstore, we stopped for ice cream and then headed back to hotel to call it a night.

Well, I thought we were going to call it a night, but Edward wanted to start where we left off earlier...Okay, so I wanted to as well.

We slept in until about nine the next morning. We met the others for a continental breakfast and then Alice and I went back to our rooms to put on our dresses before heading down for hair and makeup. I showed Edward the new lingerie I got since he was very interested in seeing it once he learned about the gifts Coley gave us. The merlot color of the underwear matched my dress perfectly. Too bad the thong didn't feel as nice as it looked.

As soon as I put the dress on Edward wanted to take it back off again.

"Edward," I said trying to sound stern. "I have to go and get beautified."

"That's unnecessary," he stated kissing my collarbone. "You're already beautiful. Can I see that lingerie again, love?"

"I think you've had an eyeful already," I joked. "But…you can see it… again…later tonight," I managed to say in between kisses while squirming.

"What's the matter?" Edward asked. I normally don't try to wiggle out of his embrace, especially when he's cupping my butt cheeks.

"Ugh! It's this stupid thong," I grumbled. It was so uncomfortable. "I don't think I can wear this anal floss all day. Shoot and I have to go downstairs to get ready too."

Edward merely laughed at me as we got on the elevator. I was still dancing like I had ants in my pants. "Can I help you, Bella?" he asked highly amused.

"You know what? Screw it." Thank goodness we were alone on the elevator. I hiked up my dress and pulled the offending material out of my butt crack and down my leg, crumpling it up once I got it off and stuck it in Edward's pocket. "Ahhh!" I sighed in relief and comfort as the elevator door opened. Finally, I felt free again.

I stepped out and started walking until I realized Edward wasn't next to me. I looked back and saw that Edward was still standing in the elevator, frozen in place, mouth agape with the look of utter shock on his face.

"Edward?" I called to him. He shook his head slightly as if to wake himself up. It was the same thing I do to undazzle myself after Edward worked his crooked smile and Cullen charm on me. He sprinted to catch up to me and then grabbed my hand to pull me down the nearest corridor.

****Yep. Lemon right here. You can stop reading if you wish****

He found a bathroom, I think it may have been an employee bathroom since it had a lock on it which Edward put to use. "Edward?" I asked.

"That was so fucking hot, Bella," he breathed. Edward backed me up against the nearest wall and assaulted my mouth with his. He proceeded to undo his own pants and pushed them down along with his boxer briefs. Edward then hiked my dress up while picking me up. I moaned into his mouth as he penetrated me. I had never seen him this primeval before. It was extremely sexy to say the least. Edward thrust in and out of me fast and furiously as he supported my weight with his arms.

I tried to be as quiet as possible, but the pleasure of Edward slamming in and out of me along with his hot tongue on my neck, collarbone, and shoulder was all too much. Edward plunged into me one more time so hard and deep I think my teeth rattled in my head. I clenched around him and muffled my moaning of his name against his shoulder as I climaxed. I may have bit down on him as well. I'm not sure if Edward's moaning of my name was out of pleasure or pain. Perhaps it was a mixture of the two, but I soon felt his body relax in response to his own release.

After a moment Edward must have realized fully that we just had some hot bathroom sex and was slightly embarrassed about the quickie.

"I'm sorry, Bella. Are you all right?" he asked with concern in his green eyes.

I smiled as I squeezed his ambassador, still inside of me. Edward bit his lip in pleasure and smiled at my response. "Um, if that's what happens when I go commando," I kissed his lips and pressed my forehead against his, "I'll have to do it more often."

Edward smiled sheepishly, "Wham, bam, thank you ma'am," he said with a wink and a crooked smile.

**A/N Well, two lemons in a row. And I posted the lemon this time. You're welcome? Though, I suppose the quickie is a lemon drop, but I don't know what's come over me. I've got smut on the brain I guess. Please forgive my dirty ways. Until next time…Oh, do I have to ask? Click that button below and review would you?**


	15. Different Is Good & I

**A/N I am not Stephenie Meyer, obviously, but thanks for reading this anyway!**

**Well, I'm glad I'm not alone in my dirty ways. Lots of fans of the lemon drop out there.**

**About this chapter: If you don't know the song "By Your Side" by Sade, I suggest you listen to it immediately. Like right now. Go ahead. I'll wait…**

**Okay, so that was some of the inspiration for this chapter. Here goes. Remember to REAR. I'll remind you again at the end. Oh, yes, there's a lemon. You're welcome early. It's towards the end, I'll section it off, but you must read the end of the chapter. Well, I guess you don't have to, but I strongly suggest that you do read beyond the lemon if you are skipping the lemon. Does that make sense?**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 16**

**BPoV**

After Edward and I made sure my dress wasn't ridiculously wrinkled from the bathroom escapade, I made my way to the beautification headquarters. Luckily, everyone was too busy and wrapped up in Coley to scrutinize over me too much, and all too quickly we were caught up in a whirlwind of limos, wedding guests, and camera flashes.

Coley looked nothing less than breathtaking in her simple strapless dress with a gauzy overlay and intricate pearl beading on the bust. She looked very much the part of the glamorous wife of a professional baseball player yet she was approachable in her demeanor. Her smile was plastered to her face all day and night, but it was genuine. I knew her face was going to hurt the next day, just like mine would. I was just as happy for them as they were.

Drew did his best man's speech first. It was nice, short, and witty. Nothing too embarrassing or crass. I kept the light mood going with my own speech, thanking Drew for his toast and congratulating him on being the best man, "But let's face it, I'm really the maid of honor _and_ best man since we three have been such good friends for so long. For all intents and purposes, Coley is my sister and Chad my brother. So it only seems fitting that they get married. Wait," I made a face pretending like I didn't know what I was saying. "That doesn't sound right does it?" Everyone laughed just as I hoped they would.

"Anyway, I know that Chad and Coley don't want actual gifts for themselves but donations to their charity instead, but I'm giving them a little something anyway." I smiled and looked at Coley who seemed a little surprised. "Remember way back in high school we both decided that we wanted 'By Your Side' to be our wedding song when we danced with our husbands?" She nodded, a huge grin appearing on her face once again. "I know you planned on using it anyway, but I thought I'd give you my blessing to use _my _wedding song at _your_ wedding," I joked. More laughter. "Besides, it's perfect for you guys," Though I held it together throughout the wedding ceremony, I started choking up just a little at this part of my speech. Coley stood up to hug me, and all we heard were _aww_'s from guests throughout the room. She was getting choked up as well, and we laughed at ourselves. I looked to the DJ and nodded cuing him to start the song. "Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Mr. and Mrs. Chad Cottrell and their first dance together as husband and wife!"

Chad stood up to hug me and then he and Coley took to the floor while we all sat by and watched them dance, listening to Sade. It was a beautiful thing to see them staring into each other's eyes as if they were the only two people in the universe, like they didn't even realize there was an entire ballroom of people gawking at them. They were so happy together, I couldn't help but smile as I watched them dance. Or maybe I was grinning because Edward and I locked eyes a couple times during the song and he'd smile or wink at me.

Alice and I sat at the head table through dinner but later moved to our family's table for the rest of the reception after my speech and the first dance. Throughout dinner we noticed that Hal and Shane, who were also sitting at our family's table, were entertaining the group there. Well, it seemed like Hal was doing most of the entertaining, of course. Eli laughed along with everyone else so I ascertained that Hal wasn't being too Hal-ish, and his material was G-rated. Thank goodness.

Everyone at the table clapped softly as Alice and I approached and took our seats, Alice next to Jasper while I was between Edward and Eli.

"Nice speech, Bella!" Renee and Hal both squealed, eliciting laughter from everyone else at the table.

"Thanks," I blushed.

Edward put his arm around me and leaned toward me, kissing my cheek and whispering, "It was perfect, love. _You_ were perfect."

I smiled and thanked him for his kind words.

"You're right, Bella. That song is perfect for a wedding. I can see why you really like it," Rosalie commented.

"Do you think Coley'll let you use it someday?" Alice asked.

I laughed, "I don't know. Maybe she'll regift it to back to me. What do you think?"

Amongst the chuckling at the table I _thought_ I heard Edward musing, "We can find a different song."

"What'd you…" I turned to fully look at him. He had a sly, crooked smile on his face. At first I looked dumbfounded, I'm sure, but as soon as I gazed into his green eyes, my lips, too, formed a slight but curious smile. Dammit! Dazzled again. Before I could ask Edward to repeat what he just said, a flash went off jolting us back to reality and ruining whatever moment we were just having. I was a little irritated, but Edward only laughed at my expression.

The photographer hung out at our table for a little while taking family photos as well as pictures of each couple.

As the reception continued on, the couples at my table, Alice and Jasper, Rose and Emmett, Renee and Phil, and Hal and Shane all got up to dance while Edward and I hung out with Eli. I didn't want to dance anyway, with or without a healing captain. Nothing good comes from me dancing. I was content to sit between my two favorite guys.

Coley and Chad finally made their way over to us. They had been extremely busy all night, of course, visiting with everyone.

"Are you tired yet?" I asked them.

"I don't think the fatigue will hit me until tomorrow," Coley answered as she leaned down to hug me again. "Thanks again for Sade, Bella."

I laughed, "You're welcome, but it's not like I gave you the actual singer. The song really is perfect for you two though. Congratulations."

"Thanks," they both said.

"Eli, are you having a good time?" Coley asked him.

Eli was so cute. His eyes grew wide like he hadn't properly seen Coley all day. "You look like Cinderella, Coley."

Edward, Chad, and I stifled our laughter. It'd be a compliment to pretty much anyone else. Coley was gracious, of course, smiling and leaning down to kiss Eli's cheek. "Thank you very much, Eli." Eli smiled his missing tooth smile at her. She then eyed the rest of us. "It's very much a compliment coming from Eli, and I appreciate it. Now, if _I_ said it _you_, it'd be a different story," she said only loud enough for me to hear. I laughed and nodded in acknowledgement.

It was approaching ten o'clock when my mom and Phil needed to get Eli to bed. "Now you two can dance!" Renee pointed out. I rolled my eyes, but Edward smiled.

I looked at him, "Did you want to dance?"

"Oh, one dance wouldn't kill us."

"Don't be so sure about that. Unless you were talking about dancing with someone other than me," I told Edward.

He chuckled as he took my hand to help me up. "Who else would I dance with?"

"As long as you know what you're getting yourself into," I warned.

We told Mom, Phil, and Eli goodnight. Phil got down to give Eli a piggy back ride while my mom hugged Edward and me at the same time saying, "You two are so great together. I'm happy you've found each other." She kissed my cheek, "Goodnight, kids." She then kissed Edward's cheek.

"Goodnight, Renee," Edward said.

"'Night, Mom," I smiled.

"Shall we, love?" Edward held his elbow out for me again.

I sighed but smiled at him all the same as I slipped my arm through Edward's and he led me to the dance floor.

Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and I placed my hands on his chest as we danced to another good and potential wedding song: Surface's _Shower Me With Your Love_, which reminded me.

"Hey, what'd you say at the table about finding a song?" I asked Edward.

He smiled and even had a twinkle in his eye as he opened his mouth to answer but was interrupted by Emmett.

"Good to see you two finally made it to the dance floor. Try not to fracture any of Edward's captains, Bella," he chuckled. Rosalie rolled her eyes at her husband and gestured with her hand, pretending to take a drink while tilting her head toward Emmett. Edward and I just laughed as they danced off in another direction.

"He just loves to bust my chops, doesn't he?" I asked still giggling but also shaking my head.

"It's a big brother thing I think," Edward said. "Anyway, I was about to say that I was thinking when we…"

But this time, before he could finish his thought, Alice interrupted, "Bella, don't you just love this song? Jasper and I are considering it for our wedding song now. What do you think?"

I smiled, "It's a really good song, Alice. It'd be great for you two."

"I know," she mouthed as they too danced away.

I looked up at Edward and chuckled because our conversation kept getting cut off and also because I just had another potential wedding song stolen. "There goes another one I can scratch off the list, Edward."

"Another song?" he asked.

"Yep. Oh well," I shrugged, "It's not like I'd be needing one any time soon, right?"

I waited for him to say something, but Edward only looked at me, studying my face curiously.

"Would you be opposed to _Sound of Pulling Heaven Down_ or _18__th__ Floor Balcony_?"

"For what?" I asked pulling my eyebrows together. I loved Blue October and specifically I loved both those songs. The song we were dancing to ended, but _Always_ by Atlantic Star came on so we continued dancing. As long as the songs were slow, I didn't mind staying wrapped in Edward's arms.

"For us," he shrugged.

"For us what?" I tried to prompt him for more details.

"Just…for us," he said again.

I felt my heart sink just a little, in disappointment. Was I expecting him to say _as a wedding song for us_? Yeah, I guess I was, but did I have a right to? We've only been together a month. I shouldn't be expecting a proposal of all things. That'd be ridiculous…wouldn't it?

Still, I wondered if Edward had ever even entertained the thought of us getting married, or if it was just me? Probably he hasn't. I mean, he's in med school. He's far too busy thinking about his career in medicine than idly daydreaming about how impossibly perfect it would be for us to be married, together, forever…

"Bella? Are you okay?" Edward asked.

"I thought _23_ was our song," I said randomly trying not to give away the fact that I was just fantasizing about something I shouldn't be fantasizing about.

Edward smirked, "That's our song for you know…_more."_

"Ahh, right." _More_. Then another thought hit me. Not so much a thought but the proverb: _Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?_ I wondered if that was the situation I was getting myself into. But Edward wouldn't use me for sex. What the hell was I even thinking about? Perhaps I had been reading too many LaLo letters.

I felt my cheeks heat up first from anger for thinking Edward would use me for sex and then from the embarrassment of thinking that, no matter how fleeting the idea. But I did wonder what his intentions were, if he had any anyways. I brought my gaze from nothing on the other side of the room back up to Edward's eyes.

"Are you okay?" he repeated. "You look a little flushed."

"Um…yeah. It's getting a little warm in here." And I was suddenly not in the mood for dancing anymore. "I think I just need some air."

"Oh, okay. Let's step outside then."

I nodded. We were about to leave the ballroom when Emmett caught up to us. "Hey, Edward. I was talking to some ball players over there. They used to play for the Mariners, and I was telling them how we're fans. Come on, man. Come talk to them."

"Well, Bella and I were just stepping outside for a moment, Emmett," Edward said.

"Aww, come on. When else are you going to get to hang out with pro athletes?"

"It's okay, Edward. I'll just be out here. You go ahead. I'll be back in a minute," I said. I actually wanted a little time to myself anyway to clear my head.

"Are you sure, Bella?" Edward asked. There was a little bit of concern in his voice.

"Yeah, go ahead. I'm fine. Have fun," I mustered a reassuring smile for him.

"All right. I'll see you in a few minutes?" he asked. I nodded and he kissed me quickly before Emmett dragged Edward away.

I turned around and kept walking outside until I found a bench to sit on. It was warm outside, not sweltering like in the summertime, but cooler than it felt in the ballroom anyway. It was pitch black out but the sky was clear. I leaned back and looked up at the stars, trying to concentrate on them in order to rid my brain of extraneous and silly assumptions and ideas. _Trying to. _I was failing miserably. I kept thinking about what I thought I heard Edward say; that _we_ could find our own song. Our own wedding song? That's what we had been talking about, not just a song for the sake of having a song.

I must have read too much into it. Isn't that my specialty after all? Why can't I just leave well enough alone? What Edward and I had going on was great. It was beyond great. I'd be selfish to want anything more, wouldn't I? Still, there's a part of me that always wants more than what I already have. When I was friends with Edward I wanted a romantic relationship. Now that I'm in this fantastic romantic relationship with him I want…a proposal? Or I at least wanted him to _want_ to marry me. Ugh! I'm so dumb. _Get it together, Bella, and be happy that you have a man whom you love that loves you back! Stop being greedy._

"Hey, Bella," I heard Alice say from behind me, interrupting my self-loathing. I turned to look at her. "Edward said you were out here."

"Hey, Alice. You need some fresh air too?" I smiled as she sat down next to me.

"Yeah. Plus my dancing partner is talking baseball with the guys. I thought you could use some company. What's up?"

I shook my head, "Nothing's up. Just enjoying the stars. We don't get to see them much in Seattle."

"That's true. It's beautiful here isn't it. I can see why you love it. It adds to the romance of the night doesn't it?" Alice asked.

I smiled at that. Yes, the romance of the night. That's probably why I was a little sad. I got caught up in it, expecting things I normally wouldn't be expecting otherwise. At least, things I _shouldn't _be expecting. I made a soft tsking sound, quietly berating myself.

"What's the matter, Bella? You seem a little down," Alice observed.

"No, I'm fine," I said. I didn't want to tell her how silly I was being. "Just reminding myself to not be too dumb and get swept up in the romance of the wedding."

"Would that be a bad thing?" she asked.

"Mmm, potentially." _Bad for my heart_, I thought.

"You want to talk about it?" she asked.

I shook my head. "Not really, but thanks." Alice gave me an uncertain look. "I'm fine, Alice. Really," I laughed a little. "I'd tell you if it were something major. Promise."

"Okay," she said hesitantly. "I'm going back in. Are you coming?"

"I think I'll stay a little longer. It feels really nice out here."

Alice made a face, like she wasn't convinced but got up anyway. "All right. I'll tell Edward you're still…Oh, hey, Edward," Alice stuttered as she turned to go.

I turned my head to see Edward standing not five feet from us. He looked a little confused. I wondered how long he was behind us. How much had he heard?

"See you two later," Alice said as she passed her brother.

"Hey," I said to Edward. He answered back with a _hey_ as he came to sit down next to me, automatically taking my hand into his.

"Have fun with the ball players?" I asked.

Edward shrugged, "They're just regular guys. It wasn't that big a deal. They're all pretty fun. Drew the pitcher and Fiona seem to be getting along," he commented.

I smiled, "That's good."

We sat there quietly for a moment. I was focused on the feeling of my hand sandwiched between Edward's, fingers on his top hand lazily drawing patterns on my palm.

"You okay?" he asked me finally.

"Uh-huh," I answered quietly.

Edward put an arm around me and I scooted closer to him, resting my head on his shoulder. "Do you want to go back to the room?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said, "but we should say goodnight to Coley and the others."

Edward nodded and stood up, pulling me up with him and then studying my face yet again before leaning in for a kiss. "You know I love you right?"

I smiled at the sentiment and the memory. That's what he said a month ago. "Yes. You know I love you too, right?" I completed our original conversation from the month before. Edward returned my smile, possibly thinking back to the night of our confessions as well.

We stopped back in the ballroom to say goodnight. The party was dwindling anyway with only a handful of couples left. We found Coley and Chad and made plans to see them for breakfast here at the hotel in the morning and then they'd drive us to the airport for our noon flight back to Seattle and my mom's flight to Jacksonville at one. Then they'd leave on their honeymoon later that evening.

Edward and I didn't talk much in the elevator, as there was another couple in there with us. He had his hand on the small of my back the entire trip up to our floor. Once we were in our room he sat down on the bed and held his arms out to me. I sat down on his lap and he wrapped his arms around me.

"Bella, you're sad. What's wrong, love?" he asked softly stroking my cheek.

I just shook my head. "You don't want to know."

"Did I upset you?"

I shook my head again. "No. Not really. I upset myself. It's nothing," I said morosely.

"It can't be nothing. Please tell me? Does it have to do with what you said to Alice about getting swept up in the romance of the wedding?"

"Oh. You heard that?" I made a face. I was hoping he hadn't heard it.

"Yeah. So what does that mean?" He asked curiously. "And don't tell me _nothing_. Why is it potentially bad like you said?"

I sighed. "Because then my overactive imagination will get me in trouble," I explained. Edward still had a confused look on his face. I went on, "I'll start thinking about things I shouldn't be thinking about," I said cryptically.

"Like?" Edward prompted.

"Like wedding songs," I shrugged.

"You're sad about wedding songs?" he asked.

I shook my head. He wasn't getting it. "Okay, I guess what it comes down to is I'm sad that…" this was going to be tough to get out, but I had to get it off my chest. "I'm sad because I think I feel more for you… than you do for me." There I said it, but I instantly regretted it because the expression Edward had looked like I had just slapped him.

"See. I told you you didn't want to know," I said glumly.

"No. I always want to know what you're thinking. I just wished you didn't think _that_," he said slowly. "Why _do_ you think that anyway?"

"Because of the song discussion earlier," I said lamely. He gave me another curious look. I shook my head. "This is so humiliating. Once again. Okay, don't think I'm psycho," I ordered. "Well, don't think I'm more psycho than you probably already think I am."

"Bella, please," Edward urged.

"Okay, so when you were talking about the Blue October songs, a part of me hoped that you were talking about our…oh god, I have to say it…wedding song. And I was a little disappointed that it wasn't what you meant, I admit. And I know I have no right to expect that, but I was disappointed nonetheless."

Edward opened his mouth to talk but I continued quickly, "And then I thought of the old proverb about why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free and then I got angry and then embarrassed for thinking it because you would never use me and then I just settled on being sad." Wow, my verbal diarrhea was truly flowing now. "So go ahead and tell me I'm nuts."

Edward was quiet as he processed my rant. And then he started laughing, which was extremely irritating so I pursed my lips and clenched my jaw, folding my arms across my chest.

"I'm not laughing at you, Bella," he said through his chuckling fit. "I'm laughing at…okay, I'm laughing at you a little bit, love, but I'm mostly laughing at the situation." He held up a finger as he calmed down. "Your mom was right. We _are_ great together. I guess we're both psycho you could say because I _was_ actually talking about a wedding song, but then I didn't want you to think I was crazy for already thinking about it especially when you said _It's not like I need one anytime soon_ so I just left it at a song for us." He looked sheepish.

I made a face, "_Really_?" I felt a little better now. A lot better actually. We were both psycho. Great!

"Yeah, really. And by the way, I hate that cow expression."

"You and I both," I said. "But at least you're not the cow in the scenario."

"What are you talking about? I could be the cow."

"Edward, in a million years, you'd never be the cow," I rolled my eyes at him.

"Bella, I could very well be the cow in this scenario," he said seriously.

"No, because if you were the cow, I'd for sure be buying you," I said gravely.

"You would?" he asked smiling.

"Yes. I don't want anyone else to get your milk. I want it all to myself."

"I feel the same way," Edward agreed.

And then we just stared at each other for a moment before we started laughing. This was such a ridiculous conversation.

"Wait. Are we talking about what I think we're talking about?" I asked. "What did we just agree on? Just to be clear."

"I believe we just decided that we want to get married…to each other," Edward affirmed. We stared at each other again and this time, we both smiled. "We're on the same page then?" he asked.

"No," I negated him. His face fell slightly, but I clarified. "We're on the same bed actually," I said as I placed my hands on his face and kissed him. Edward kissed me back, tracing his tongue over my bottom lip making me smile.

He pulled his face away so he could look at me. "We're a couple of idiots," I said.

Edward grinned, "Well, this idiot," he made air quotes for the word _idiot_, "has your underwear in his pocket."

"Oh, I forgot about that, but what does that even mean?" I asked.

"It means, love, that I can't be that big of an idiot if I have a beautiful woman's panties in my pocket. Specifically, _your_ skimpy underwear. So I must be smart enough to be doing something right. Right?" He sounded so smug.

"You were merely at the right place at the right time, _love_," I responded indifferently.

Edward shook his head at my remark as he gently pushed me off of his lap to stand me in front of him. "Really?" he asked in disbelief. "So," Edward said seductively, "You would have pulled your dress up like this," He hiked my dress up just enough to place his hands on my legs and slowly move them up. I closed my eyes to relish in his hot touch. "And shown just anyone all this beautiful, tempting flesh?" he asked as he grabbed my butt with one hand and massaged my bare wet folds with his other hand.

My breath hitched from the sensation of his fingers lingering and teasing me at my entrance. I bit my lip and moaned, "Mmmm."

"What was that, love?" Edward asked with a slight smile in his tone. "Yes or no?"

I sighed in ecstasy and straddled Edward's lap while he continued to caress me. First, I kissed him hard, urging him to rub me harder which he did. His middle and ring fingers were already curled inside me, and Edward's index finger was massaging my most sensitive spot. I bit his bottom lip before moving my mouth to Edward's ear. "No. You know you're the only man I'd show my sex to, love," I whispered and then licked his entire ear before darting my tongue in once, smiling knowing I was weakening his resolve to dominate me.

Edward pumped me a little harder still, causing me to arch my back, throwing my breasts in his face. Unfortunately, the dress was still in the way. Grudgingly, I lifted myself up from his lap, gasping a bit as his fingers left my body, but not before he twisted his fingers a little while flicking the little nub. I undid his tie and unbuttoned Edward's shirt and then helped him shrug out of both the shirt and jacket. I left open mouthed kisses along his exposed neck and chest as I loosened his belt and then unclasped his trousers. I pulled Edward up to a standing position, helping him out of his pants and underwear.

I kneeled down briefly to lick the length of Edward's hardened shaft from the base to the tip then I stood up and turned around with my back to him, pulling my hair out of the way so Edward could unzip my dress. I dropped my hair as soon as the dress fell from my body creating a silky pool of merlot on the floor.

Edward's hands immediately covered the lace front of my bra, squeezing my nipples through the fabric while his mouth was on the back of my neck. I unhooked the bra myself, and Edward pulled it off of me in one swift motion, tossing it aside.

His fingers found my entrance once again while his other hand was kneading my breasts. I could feel his hot tongue on the nape of my neck and along my shoulders. I reached around and grabbed his butt, holding him closer to me as I pushed my backside against his erection. If it were possible, his hardness made me even wetter. I was dripping as it was.

"Tell me how you want it, Isabella," Edward said authoritatively.

Somehow, Edward gets me to say things I never thought I'd ever say. And when it came to _more, _he never made me feel ashamed for saying these things, no matter how dirty. In fact, I never even hesitated to tell him exactly what I wanted in bed; I was that comfortable with him there.

"Bella?" he prompted, pumping me even harder.

I moaned his name before I answered, "I want to feel your tongue where your fingers are. I'm aching for your mouth between my legs, Edward," I begged. Edward turned me around to face him and started to kneel but I stopped him. "Wait. I want you to lay on the bed first," I told him. He looked at me, nodded, and did as I said. His arms were folded behind his head waiting for me. I crawled toward him, kissing his mouth once I reached him. "Now close your eyes," I said softly, and he did. I kissed from his mouth on down to the tip of his shaft, taking as much in as I could from beside him but then decided to straddle Edward in order to do a better job.

I looked to make sure Edward still had his eyes closed; they were. I was on all fours hovering above him, taking his erection into my mouth once again while lowering my body onto his mouth. I felt Edward's breath on my bare skin and then gasped as his hands held onto my butt while his tongue made its way into my wet entrance.

I continued to massage the boys with my hands as I worked his ambassador with my mouth, while Edward was pleasuring me with his. His tongue darted in and out, swirling and sucking. We were both bucking our hips in rhythm to each other's mouths until both our bodies tensed in anticipation of our release. A shiver went through me as I writhed in pleasure from Edward's skilled tongue. My climax set him off as I swallowed what he spilled out into my mouth.

Finally, I collapsed onto Edward's sweaty body, and sighed in satisfaction. Edward had stopped moving as well, I noticed, until I felt him blowing softly between my legs; we were still in the sixty-nine. I squirmed and moaned but managed to tease him back swirling my tongue on the tip of the ambassador and then blowing lightly on it. Edward squirmed too but also surrendered with an, "Okay, I give up."

**************************************************END OF LEMON********************************************************************

I laughed as I repositioned myself so we were face to face at last. He stole a quick kiss as he smiled, "That was different."

"Mmhmm," I said. "Different is good, right?"

"Absolutely. Everything we seem to do is out of the norm. Don't you think, love?"

I shrugged, "But who's to define what's really normal though," I countered. "I mean, what's different for everyone else could be normal for us."

"True," Edward conceded, "Bella?"

"Hmm?"

"Continuing from the cow conversation, I need to ask you officially then," Edward began. I sat up to look at him, my heart nearly stopped. Edward sat up as well, looking into my eyes, which were wide in anticipation. "I've wasted so much time already, and I don't want to waste any more. It's taken me all these years to finally realize how you complete me. You're my best friend, and I love you with every fiber of my," he looked down at himself briefly before finishing, "currently naked being. I know I look ridiculous right now, but will you marry me?" he asked, smiling crookedly at me.

I bit my lip to keep from either laughing or crying but managed to nod my head in assent.

"Thank you," Edward sighed capturing my lips with his. And so we were engaged. Naked and engaged.

**A/N Alrighty then. That's right, naked and engaged. Nothing wrong with that, right? So that's three lemons in a row. This is unprecedented for me. I hope you enjoyed it. I don't know when the next lemon or lemon drop will be. I'm kind of spent. Don't forget to REAR please. Remember how REARing motivates me.**


	16. Doing It Right

**A/N Steph Meyer would NEVER deign herself to place Edward and Bella in a naked and engaged situation, nor would they have that cow conversation, probably. Lucky for you, I am not Steph Meyer but a mere scrub that is not above silliness and smut. Thanks for reading.**

**Sorry for the wait. You know I like to update sooner, but classes started back up and I'm addicted to the Scramble game on my facebook. I've finally torn myself away from fb to crank this chappie out. Hope you like it. REAR please.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp…I forget. 16? 17? Depending on which site you're reading this. Whatev.**

**BPoV**

I awoke the next morning curled up next to Edward, my favorite place to be. He was holding on to me like a little kid holds onto his favorite teddy, all squeezed up against his chest. My back was to him, and I could feel his breath on the back of my head. I started to stir and stretch. Edward must have been awake since I felt his grip on me loosen allowing me to slowly turn onto my other side to face him.

"Morning," I murmured to a smiling Edward.

"Morning," he said back with a kiss to my forehead. "I love you."

"Mmm," I smiled back. "Love you too."

We just laid there in silence for who knows how long, synchronizing our breathing, basking in the comfort of just being close. I was thinking about the rollercoaster ride of emotions that was the night before. I couldn't believe how I went from happy to depressed to embarrassed to giddy in what seemed like minutes. And it all started with a comment about a song. Our song.

I sighed. My eyes were closed; I was reveling in Edward's breath above my ear, as my face was situated comfortably in the crevice between his neck and shoulder, my lips barely touching the soft skin of his throat, and his face was turned towards mine. Edward's arms wrapped around my torso and our legs intertwined.

"This is my favorite," I commented into his neck.

"What is?" he asked

"This. Just being this close. It's the best, you know?" I rubbed my feet against Edward's legs. "Plus, my feet are warm. Thanks."

"My pleasure, love. And you know what my favorite is?" he asked.

"Hmm," I breathed.

"Being close enough to kiss but being content enough to not have to. Do you know what I mean?"

The corners of my mouth pulled up. I understood what he meant. We didn't have to engage in acts of love to actually feel the love.

"And I love when I can actually feel you smile," Edward added, causing me to smile even bigger even though I wasn't even looking at him. "Like right now. _That's_ the best." Edward heaved a sigh of content to underscore his statement.

"So…" I said while biting my lip to keep from sounding too giddy. "We're engaged," I almost whispered it in case I had dreamt it up.

"And naked," Edward pointed out.

"Yes, but mostly engaged."

"Moo," he nodded, and we chuckled at the memory of the cow conversation.

"Um, what should we tell everyone?" I asked hesitantly.

"The truth?" Edward answered with no hesitation on his part.

I pulled a face as I moved in order to get a good look him. He raised both eyebrows and smiled slightly as I studied his expression.

"_Everything?_" I asked. Surely we wouldn't disclose the circumstances of the proposal.

Edward, of course, read my mind. "Well, we don't have to divulge _all_ the gory details."

I smiled at him in return, "So, negative on the full frontal disclosure?"

Edward nodded. "That's probably best. The degree of our insanity is best kept to ourselves I think." I also nodded. "And when we get back, you can pick out your ring." I made another face. Picking out engagement rings really isn't my thing, and the thought of the price of an engagement ring made me cringe with guilt. "Bella, you _will_ wear a ring won't you?"

Edward looked questioningly at me. He seemed worried that I wouldn't want to. And so I felt guilty for making him look like that.

I sighed. "I'll wear any ring you give me, Edward. It's just that I don't want you spending…"

"Shhh," he put his finger over my lips. "Don't worry about it." I tried to open my mouth in protest but couldn't. "Uh-uh," Edward laughed as he squeezed my lips together and then kissed me. I let the subject drop for the time being.

Grudgingly, we got out of bed. We had a plane to catch after all. We were soon packed and having breakfast at the hotel with everyone, engaging in the usual small talk. Emmett and Coley had a debate on jelly versus jams and preserves, amusing Eli immensely. Emmett was pro jelly while Coley maintained the stance that jam was far superior when it comes to your toasted breads and English muffins, but as far as peanut butter and jelly, it had to be grape jelly. Period.

"What's wrong with jelly on toast?" Emmett asked.

"It's okay, if that's all you've got, but jelly's not substantial enough to do toast justice. Jam holds up nicely though," Coley explained.

"What's wrong with strawberry jam with your PB and J?" Emmett asked, to which Coley responded with a horrified gasp and shudder. "You're an elitist, Coca-Coley," Emmett accused.

She shook her head, "Nope. I'm a purist. Let's not even get into butter versus margarine."

Is it bad when an eight-year-old shakes his head at you? Yes, Eli fit in quite nicely. Emmett did ask Eli to weigh in on the issue. We noticed he had peanut butter smeared on his toast, just the way I like it too. I had to smile at how much Eli and I already had in common.

"I like grape jelly with my peanut butter. I like any kind of jam or jelly on my toast, but I really like peanut butter on it," Eli said.

"There you have it," Emmett chided Coley. "And how about a round of applause for our guy, Eli, the equal opportunity condiment user?"

We all laughed as we clapped for Eli.

Coley and Chad promised to make it to Alice and Jasper's wedding in December. Coley would return the favor and be in Alice's wedding party. I was to be the MOH once again.

I was working up the courage to drop my news, but my mother saved me the trouble.

"So when will you two be tying the knot?" she casually asked Edward and me. Suddenly all eyes were on us.

Though I felt the warmth in my cheeks, Edward and I quickly glanced at each other, exchanged shrugs, and as casually as I could, I answered, "I don't know. When do you think, Edward? After Alice and Jasper some time?"

And Edward responded with, "Sure. Sounds good to me. Will that work for the rest of you?" We looked around the table at the expressions on the faces of our family and friends. They all took a moment to process what we had just said. They all had huge grins but kept the calm and cool façade going. With the exception of Hal, of course, who gasped harder than anyone not actually related to me should.

My mother and my girlfriends were waiting for me to break character a little, and once I couldn't fight the ridiculous grin from forming on my face anymore, they all got up and charged me. I was suddenly pulled out of my chair and assaulted with hugs and kisses while Edward received several slaps on the back, handshakes, and I think Emmett actually gave him a nuggie, messing up my Edward's perfectly messy head of hair.

"So you guys were expecting it?" I asked.

"Of course!" was the response we heard collectively.

"It was only a matter of time, and I love that you two don't dilly-dally," Renee said.

"You both got caught up in the romance of the wedding, I see," Alice commented smirking. "So it wasn't a bad thing after all."

"Yeah," I grinned sheepishly. "We were…on the same page on the matter but too embarrassed to admit it yet."

"Well, I think it's wonderful," Renee commented. "You two belong together. It's so clear." She threw her arms around me again. "Congratulations, baby."

"Thanks, Mom," I smiled. I love that everyone loves us together as much as we do.

And so on a very happy note was how we left the newlyweds as well as my family. Eli asked if he could come visit us in Seattle. He wanted to meet Charlie and see Edward and me of course, but he also wanted to hang out with _that big funny guy, Emmett_. Emmett was quite smug about it really. I think Eli was pretty excited that he'd be getting not only a big sister but also a few big brothers in Edward, Jasper, Chad, and Emmett, and a few more sisters in Rosalie, Coley, Alice, and Hal. Oh god! My wedding party was going to be huge. I'll have to think about where I want to put Hal, as a groomsman or a bridesmaid. I'll have to consult with Alice on that one…

I had to take some Tylenol when we got back to Seattle. The trip by plane went smoothly, but Hal was sitting next to me with Edward on my other side. Edward was fine of course, but Hal was nonstop chirping the entire way. Hal talking to me isn't even bad. I could talk to him for hours. Hell, I _used_ to talk to him for hours, but he was completely unreasonable this time. And Edward did nothing to thwart Hal's insanity. And that's what he was: insane.

So Hal first told us about a Halloween party he and Shane were throwing at their place. Couples costumes only, like Sonny and Cher or Superman and Lois Lane, stuff like that. So as I was pondering options for the party Hal asked which apartment we were going to stay in. I turned to Edward and asked if he'd move into mine. He agreed and just as I was going to tell Hal, he comes up with another brainchild.

"Oh, Bella, Edward! How about we combine your two apartments like Shane and I did upstairs. It'd be one huge apartment on the fifth floor. That would be so fun, don't you think?" Hal squealed.

I immediately started shaking my head, "Hal, no way. Edward and I can't afford…" And before I could continue he gave me a look. This look I'd seen before. It was the same one he gave me when he wanted to decorate my apartment. It was the same one he had when he informed me he had ripped up my rent checks. The expression was equal parts_ I don't understand what you're saying _and _DUH?_

And that's when I went _all Bella,_ as Coley has coined as a euphemism for the near fit slash tantrum I had on the plane. It didn't help that I had to keep my voice low as to not bother or scare the other passengers. Perhaps that's why Hal brought it up on the plane in the first place. There was nowhere for me to hide his body. And there were too many witnesses. He's such a snake that way.

"Hal, absolutely not. That's asinine. There's no way in hell…" I went on and on for quite a while. Both he and Edward let me get it out of my system I guess.

After a string of profanities and choice phrases as well as uncontrollable twitching on my part Hal finally asked. "Are you done?" All the while, during my tirade, Hal remained calm, almost bored, which irritated me even more. I set my jaw and clenched my teeth, crossing my arms over my chest looking straight ahead at the back of the seat in front of me.

"Wow, Bells, you know you barely moved your lips during that whole profanity laced discourse?" he whistled. "You're good. You'll make an excellent mom some day. You've got the pissed mom mannerisms and terse mom voice down pat. The only thing missing was your calling me by my full name."

I merely narrowed my eyes and turned to give Hal a dark look before I faced forward again. Meanwhile, Edward was rubbing circles on the top of my leg and occasionally patting it, but otherwise didn't try to calm me down. I think it was because he values his life too much.

Hal continued to talk though I wasn't looking at him.

"Baby girl, it only makes sense. You two will be getting married. You love the location already. You need bigger space for pets and kids and whatnot, and I'm too selfish to let you move out. Consider it a wedding present." Then he hit below the belt when he played the no siblings card. "You know I'm an only child. You're like my very own sister. I'd do this for my real sister if I had one, and since you're the closest thing I have to family now, I mean aside from Shane, I want to do this for you. You know I don't care about the money."

I closed my eyes and sighed. Hal's parents died when their private plane crashed while going on a weekend trip to the Bahamas. Hal was still in school, almost done with college when he inherited his parents' fortune and real estate. He had always been ridiculously generous to me, and he never asked for anything in return. Only my friendship, which was already unconditional. The fact that he was sitting next to me in coach when he could easily be in first class or even on his own plane spoke volumes.

"Aww, Hal," I whined as I turned to him and placed my head on his shoulder. "That's so touching. You know I love you too…but the answer is still no." And I sat up again feeling very smug.

"Humph," Hal grunted. "Edward, talk some sense into her please."

Edward shook his head and waved his palms, "I'm out of this one. I'll leave it up to Bella. I'll live wherever she wants to live." He then leaned in to whisper in my ear, "But just for the record, love, I think it's a great idea and we _can_ afford the remodel I'm sure." I turned to give Edward a severe look as well. He only shrugged and said, "I'm just saying."

We left it at that for the time being as well. I had quite a lot to think about from just the one weekend.

It was so nice to be back home again. I missed my mom, Phil, and Eli as well as Coley and Chad, but the traveling kicked my butt. Edward had a lot of reading and other homework to do, but he accompanied me to Forks to check on Charlie so we could tell Charlie as well as Esme and Carlisle our engagement news.

Charlie took the news very well. He could see how close Edward and I were getting without us having to tell him anything. He was happy as long as I was happy, and he of course gave us his blessing. Charlie had a bit of news himself actually. I had apologized for slacking on my meal-cooking self-assignment and asked how he'd been getting along after I had checked the freezer to find most of the portions I had frozen were still there.

Charlie actually blushed and looked a bit sheepish when he confessed that Sue Clearwater had been dropping by and bringing him food. I didn't want to pester him or embarrass my father further, but I couldn't hide the delight in my tone when I said, "_Really?_" Charlie merely shrugged and Edward just smiled crookedly at my reaction.

Esme and Carlisle were very happy. Well, Carlisle was very happy while Esme went _all Bella_ but in a good way. Carlisle hugged both of us as did Esme, but Esme was beside herself in excitement. Edward disappeared upstairs while Esme took me out to the garden in the back of their house. It was always my favorite place. She still had a thriving little sanctuary this late in the year.

"Oh, Bella," she gushed as we sat on a little wooden bench overlooking the stream. "I'm so happy for you both. Congratulations. I had always hoped you'd end up my daughter-in-law." I looked at her in surprise. She nodded, "I did. You were a part of this family the moment you and Alice and Edward became friends. And I knew you'd find your way back here eventually. You complete Edward. You complete us."

I nearly cried as she echoed the words Edward had said to me when he proposed in Phoenix. I thanked Esme for her kindness as I squeezed her hand. That's when she noted that I wasn't wearing a ring yet.

"Oh, your ring," she commented.

I made a face. "Yeah, I guess I still have to pick one out," I remarked unable to hide the guilt I couldn't help but feel about the ring situation.

Esme laughed and patted my hand. "He wants to spoil you, Bella. Let him. And you deserve it."

I looked at her and meant to ask how she figured that I deserved it, but she beat me to the punch, "We _all_ deserve it, darling." We both laughed. She was definitely related to Alice. I wondered fleetingly if she had secretly adopted Coley and Hal as well.

Edward cleared his throat to notify us that we were no longer alone. We both looked up at him smiling. Edward returned ours with a smile of his own.

"My two favorite women," he remarked. He gave Esme a kiss on the cheek before adding, "Dad's about to leave for the hospital."

"Ah, yes. I'll see you two kids later then." And with that, Esme went back inside.

Edward took my hand and pulled me up off of the bench. We started to take a little walk along the stream.

"I've always loved it back here," I told him.

"Yes, it's beautiful isn't it?" He turned to me, "Hey, are you and the captain up for a short hike?"

I smiled. I forgot to show him. "Yeah, check this out, Edward." I sat down in the grass and took off my right shoe. I had been sporting some shoes that were very lightweight for running (not that I ran), especially designed, apparently, for barefoot runners from Africa. Nike makes a shoe that keeps the captain separate from the other toes and fastens with Velcro. They were extremely comfortable. I removed my sock to show Edward as I flexed and wiggled the captain. It did pop as I flexed it, but it felt good.

"The captain's back in action, baby!" I grinned.

"Nice. Congrats. And be careful." Edward ruffled my hair as I put my sock and shoe back on and we hiked further into the woods following the stream and then crossing a little bridge over it. We talked about Charlie hooking up with Sue. _Hooking up_ was Edward's phrasing not mine. I do not ever want to place _Charlie_ that close to the phrase _hooking up_. Ever. We talked about Eli and how fun it'd be when he came to visit. We bounced around ideas for the Halloween party. I was thinking Anne of Green Gables and Gilbert Blythe while Edward was partial to Han Solo and Princess Leia for some reason. We'll see.

We finally got to a clearing, a meadow of sorts. It was circular in shape, surrounded by trees and covered with wild flowers still since the autumn so far had been mild. The sun's rays bounced perfectly off of the colorful flora.

"Edward, this is so beautiful. Where are we?" I asked in awe of my surroundings.

"This is my meadow. I've hiked out here a lot these past few years. I only discovered it when I came home after freshman year. We're about a mile and half from the house. This land used to belong to this old couple, but when they passed away, their kids who live out of state offered to sell it to Carlisle so we own it now." Edward went to sit down in the center of his meadow and I sat next to him. "I find it's very peaceful out here."

Edward then was lying down soaking in the sun. He looked so relaxed and serene with his eyes closed, I followed suit. I lay next to Edward with my head in the crook of his neck, while Edward held me close to him.

"It's perfect here," I whispered.

"Bella?" Edward asked after a moment.

"Yes?"

"Do you want to pick out your ring now?"

My eyes popped open in surprise. "What are you talking about, Edward?" I asked as I sat back up.

Edward sat up as well. "Your ring. You can pick it out now." I gave him a strange look. Edward chuckled and pulled something out of the pocket of his jeans. "You're so worried about people spending too much on you including me and specifically for the ring. Well, I have a simple compromise." I let out a small gasp as he opened his hand to show me two rings. They were both gold bands. One held an enormous emerald cut diamond while the other held a round diamond, not as large as the other but was surrounded by smaller diamonds on either side of the precious gem.

"These both belonged to my grandmothers. They're heirlooms my parents have inherited. Carlisle and Esme gave me their permission to give them to you. So now the choice is yours. I guess it comes down to which one you want to wear right now since technically they're both yours. And no worries, like I said. I didn't even have to spend a dime. That should please you."

My gaze kept shifting from the objects in his palm up to his eyes as he explained this to me. "So which one, Bella?" Edward smiled looking eagerly at me.

It was a very tough decision as both rings were gorgeous. I couldn't believe they were both mine. I felt bad to even choose. I wished Edward had done it for me. I didn't want to offend anyone by not choosing his or her mother's ring, but I knew neither Esme nor Carlisle would mind.

I decided to take the solitaire since the thought of potentially losing a small diamond from the other ring made my stomach turn. Besides, the emerald cut of the diamond I chose reminded me of Edward's emerald eyes. Strange connection, I know, but that was what ultimately swayed me.

Edward put the other ring back in his pocket and stood me up while he got down on one knee still holding on to my left hand. I chuckled at him. Edward was determined to do this traditionally I guess. Edward looked up and graced me with his dazzling smile. "Isabella Marie Swan, I love you with every fiber of my now fully clothed being. Will you marry me?"

I fell down on my knees to meet him. I smiled at Edward as I answered verbally this time, "Yes, Edward."

Edward smiled and nodded and then gently slipped the ring on my third finger and kissed it once it was in place. He then put his hands on my waist while I placed my arms around his neck. "Thank you, love," Edward murmured right before he softly kissed my lips.

**A/N All together now, Awww! Okay, REAR and perhaps I'll get the next one faster. Oh, and I went ahead and put the pictures of the rings on my profile page if you'd like to see them.**


	17. Fantasy

**A/N I still am not Stephenie Meyer so if you're looking for quality prose, keep on looking…**

**Hey, look at me updating already! I put pictures of Bella's engagement ring as well as the other ring on my profile page if you're interested in seeing those. I made them up when I was writing but managed to find pictures online that fit my descriptions.**

**Why'd I crank out another chapter so quickly you may be asking? Well, I am procrastinating on schoolwork of course. You'd think I'd be a little more concerned about grad school right? It's all good. I do my best work under pressure. Also, I'm all kinds of excited about the inauguration tomorrow (or today or yesterday depending on when you read this). So thank Barack Obama (I'm sure he'd be so thrilled to be associated with this rubbish right?).**

**There's a little something for those who have read Saving Me...remember Edward's fantasy (chp 31 I think). Well, it rears it's ugly head.**

**Enjoy this next chapter. **

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 18**

**EPoV**

I was at Bella's apartment…No. Strike that. I was already home at _our_ apartment studying for an exam when Bella came in with Emmett. I hadn't fully moved in to Bella's place yet. My furniture was still over at my apartment but most of my things were at Bella's. We hadn't talked further about the remodel, but I was hoping Bella would decide to do it.

Bella and Emmett had returned from watching the new _Underworld_ movie for the Mars and Venus column. I had a big exam coming up, and it worked out that Emmett really wanted to see it. The _Underworld_ apparently fits my brother's criteria for an acceptable film. I would have gone with Bella despite my upcoming exam, but she insisted I study since Emmett had been pestering her for a while to review it with her. He'd be the guest Mars columnist.

"No way, Emmett," Bella insisted for the second time already since coming home.

"Come on, Bella. Why not?" Emmett pleaded.

"Because it's juvenile. I will not have you make a mockery of my column. Why can't you just be Mars like Edward?" Bella sounded exasperated.

"Because he's already Mars. I want to be something different."

"What's going on?" I asked them as Bella sat down at the table with me. Emmett took the chair directly across from her. They brought home some hummus and pita chips so we started to dig in.

"Emmett refuses to be called Mars for this week's column even though he is clearly a Mars," Bella explained in between bites.

"That's because _you're_ Mars, little bro. I want my own planet."

Bella rolled her eyes and shook her head. "I offered you Jupiter and Saturn already, Emmett. You have those three choices or not be in the column at all."

"Yeah, those planets are okay, but they're not very funny," Emmett commented.

I had an idea of which planet Emmett wanted to be, but I was hoping I was wrong.

"Fine, Emmett. You can have any other planet _except_ that one. So take your pick. I'll even offer you Pluto despite it being labeled a dwarf planet now," Bella bargained.

Emmett made a face, "Big Em's no dwarf planet, Bella. Come on. Reconsider. Think of the comedic effect."

"Do I even have to ask which planet you want to be, Emmett?" I asked cautiously.

"Don't encourage him, Edward," Bella warned.

Emmett had a big smug smile on his face as he answered, "Uranus." That figures. He was nodding at me like it was the best idea ever. I merely shook my head at my brother. He looked to Bella who got up to get a bottle of water. "Can I be Uranus, Bella?" Emmett called to her. "What was that? I couldn't hear you."

Bella was mumbling and grumbling, and I believe I heard her say something to the effect that Emmett already was being an anus. I snorted at the comment.

"How was the movie otherwise?" I asked. "Did the lycans rise?"

"It was pretty awesome," Emmett answered. "And yes, did they ever rise." I looked to Bella as she came back with a bottle of water for Emmett and me too. We both thanked her.

She shrugged. I knew she wasn't excited about seeing it. It wasn't her romantic vampire after all. "It was all right. The lycans looked like deranged and sadistic werewolves to me. I wouldn't want to run into one in the woods or anything. I recorded some good conversation on the special effects, and Emmett is thinking about placing Rhona Mitra on his laminated list." At the mention of the actress's name Emmett pursed his lips and blew out air in an inaudible whistle. He even nodded to emphasize her hotness. Bella rolled her eyes at my brother as she continued, "It was all good until Emmett decide to be an anus." I smiled. I _had_ heard her correctly.

"_Ur-a-nus,_" Emmett corrected her.

"Leave my anus out of this, Emmett," Bella snickered.

"Ha! I finally got a laugh out of you. See it's funny, Bella."

"Be that as it may, Emmett, I'm pulling rank and calling you Saturn."

"What? No. Come on. Why?" Emmett sounded like a little kid being told to go to bed at an early hour.

And right on cue Bella answered, "Because I said so, that's why. It's an executive decision. Deal with it." She gave Emmett a nod of finality right before she took a swig of water.

Emmett made a face. "Fine. But you still have time to think about it before it goes to print. It's funny, Bella. Do it." Emmett checked his watch and noticed how late it was getting. "I gotta go," he said as he walked to the door. "Good luck on your exam tomorrow, bro. And Bella, think about it. I know you'll do the right thing. You're a good kid." And with that Emmett closed the door behind him and left.

Bella and I looked at each other and laughed. Emmett's such a character. "I hope you don't change your mind about marrying into my family now because of Emmett," I joked as I pulled Bella into my lap.

"I believe I knew what I was getting myself into the moment I said yes," she said. "Emmett's lucky he makes such good lattes and that Eli really likes him."

"Yes, Emmett has his moments and is all right to have around sometimes," I remarked.

"So who's on your laminated list, Bella?" I was genuinely curious but already a little jealous and she hadn't even answered yet. It's probably that vampire guy. Or the _smoking hot_ soft porn D and G model.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" she retorted cryptically. I narrowed my eyes at her and she laughed. "You first. I always disclose embarrassing information first. It's your turn."

I sighed. I hadn't really thought about a laminated list. I've been consumed with Bella this past month. It's been an incredible month and we have a lifetime ahead of us still. That is an awesome feeling.

"Hello? Edward?" Bella was looking at me expectantly. "Who's on your laminated list?"

I smiled, "You." Bella groaned and rolled her eyes.

She pushed off of me to try to get up from my lap, "Okay, if you're not even going to play this game right then forget it."

I laughed as I tightened my grip on her so she couldn't leave me lap. "What?" I asked.

"The point is to pick someone unattainable, Edward."

"So you're mad because I put you at the top of my laminated list?" I asked still chuckling.

"I'm not mad. I'm…annoyed. You don't get my answer until I get a real one from you."

I studied her face. She wasn't mad. Did she really want to hear the name of someone else I'd want to be with? I wondered if this was a trick question. Would I get into trouble if I did say a name? Well, I got in trouble for not saying a name. Hmmm. Damn. Women are so tricky.

"Fine. Kristen Stewart," I said arbitrarily.

"_Really_?"

"Yeah. Why? What's wrong with her?" I asked.

Bella shrugged. "Nothing. She's not as hot as Rhona Mitra."

"Do you want me to put Rhona Mitra on my list?" I asked.

"If I were a guy she'd be at the top. Hell, she's so hot I may just put her on mine," Bella laughed. Aww, man. Am I the only guy who thinks it's hot for his woman to talk about other women like that?

"You need to stop that, Bella. You have no idea what that does to me."

Bella shook her head at me. "You're such a guy."

I nodded. No argument there. "So you're up, love. Who's at the top? Cedric Diggory?" She laughed her assent and I rolled my eyes. "Figures."

Bella grabbed my face to kiss me softly and I forgot what I was annoyed about. This woman was good. "How's the studying going?" Bella asked as she looked over my notes and textbooks.

"Okay. I only started a little while before you came home. I figured you'd be up late working on the column so I'd stay up with you studying. I…uh…went out and got our costumes for the party." I tried not to sound nervous. I know she doesn't like surprises, but we talked and had already thrown around some ideas for potential costumes. I hoped against hope she'd wear what I picked out.

"Oh, yeah? What'd you get? Let's see," Bella said brightly.

We went into the bedroom and on the bed were the costumes. Bella looked to what was on the bed and then looked to me. "I see _your_ costume, Edward, but where's mine?" she asked curiously.

I swallowed, "Right there next to my Han Solo get-up."

Bella was quiet for a moment as she looked at the costume next to mine. "I see, but where's _the rest of it_?" she asked pointedly.

"Um, that's it. You remember her metal bikini right? When she was Jabba the Hutt's slave?"

Bella raised her eyebrows and I brace myself for her going all Bella. If she were to slap me, I guess I would have deserved it. It's a very sexy outfit, leaving very little to the imagination yet still feeding the imagination simultaneously. And really, what guy hasn't ever had the Princess Leia from _Return of the Jedi _fantasy?

Bella pointed first to herself and then to the costume as she asked, "So you want _me _to wear _that_?" She asked slowly and calmly. A little too calmly actually.

I nodded lamely. I grimaced a little waiting for the tirade, but it never came.

Bella shrugged, "Okay."

I had to do a double take. "_Really_?" I was suddenly suspicious but didn't indicate my skepticism.

Bella nodded. "Sure. You went to all the trouble of picking it out. The party is in a couple days, and it actually saves me the trouble of going shopping so, yes."

I'm a lucky, lucky man. I couldn't hide my grin. I felt like I just drank some Felix Felicis, I was feeling so lucky. I guess that's why I decided to push my good fortune a little further. "Will you try it on?" I asked.

Bella eyed me warily. I gave her my most dazzling smile. She rolled her eyes. She was onto the smile routine I think. But instead of refusing, she grabbed the bikini and went down the hall into the bathroom. I was hoping she'd disrobe right in front of me, but I guess it'd be just as fun to watch her walk back into the bedroom with it on. I went to lie down on the bed so I could get a good view of her as she walked in.

I don't know how long I was lying on the bed waiting. I heard the bathroom door close and I waited a few minutes since the metal bikini may have been a little difficult to get on. I hoped that if she were having trouble with it she would call for me. I wouldn't mind helping her put that sexy costume on. After a few minutes I heard the bathroom door open. I waited. She still hadn't come into the bedroom.

"Bella?" I called out towards the hallway.

"Yes?" she asked. It sounded like she was in the living room.

"Where are you?" I was a little confused.

"In the living room," Bella answered. I immediately smiled imagining her draped across the leather sofa clad in only the metal bikini with the chain hanging from her neck. I suddenly couldn't get to the living room fast enough. But when I got there, Bella was in her regular clothes sitting on the floor typing away on her laptop.

I was really confused now. "What are you doing?" I asked.

She stopped typing long enough to look up at me with an expression that asked _isn't it obvious?_ "I'm working on the column."

I went to sit next to her as she resumed typing. "What about the costume?" I asked trying not to pout.

"Yeah, it fit," she answered casually as I stared at her. Her eyes never left the monitor.

"That's it?" I asked with a little disappointment coloring my tone.

"Oh yeah," Bella looked up from her computer. "Good job picking out my size, Edward. Not a lot of guys would get that right. You're amazing." Bella smiled at me and gave me a quick kiss. She resumed typing once again as my expression remained puzzled and, admittedly, frustrated. Bella glanced at me and asked, "Don't you need to study?" I searched her expression and focused on her tone of voice. Bella was very breezy and casual. I immediately became paranoid. She was planning something to get me back, I was sure of it.

I nodded while eyeing her carefully, "Yes, actually, I do." She smiled encouragingly at me as I got up to gather my materials from the table in order to join her on the floor. I was going to have to sleep with one eye open.

The rest of the evening up until about two thirty in the morning we were both working diligently on our respective tasks. And when it was time for bed we went through the usual routine to get ready.

We were lying quietly in the dark trying to fall asleep. Bella was snuggled up against me, her head in the crook of my neck, her arm draped across my chest.

I couldn't take it anymore so I had to bring the subject up again, "So the bikini fit okay, huh?" I asked apropos of nothing.

"Huh?" Bella asked groggily. "Oh yeah. It did," she yawned.

"I was hoping I'd get to see it on you, love," I admitted.

I felt her smile against my skin, "I know."

Ah, so it _was_ all on purpose. "But I guess I'll have to wait for Friday?"

"Yep," she answered. I felt her warm breath on my neck from her popping the _p_ and smiling even bigger as far as I could feel.

I chuckled, "Fine. Be that way. I can wait," I remarked indifferently.

"Good. I will be this way, and you'll have to," she rebutted just as indifferently but then kissed my neck.

I smiled, "Good night, Bella. Love you." I kissed the top of her head.

"Mmm. Love you too. Good night."

The next day we got up together even though Bella could have slept in if she had wanted to. We both stayed up pretty late, but I had an exam to take while she could have slept longer. Apparently, while I was showering and getting dressed, Bella cooked a big breakfast. It was very sweet of her. She wanted to make sure I had a good breakfast before taking the test.

I had the exam and then another class while Bella was going into the Times and then going back to Forks to accompany Charlie to his radiation in the early afternoon. I didn't get to see her until Thursday night when we had a nice quiet evening in. We made spaghetti and garlic bread and ate while we talked about our day.

I told her about class and the test. I had a pretty good feeling about it.

Bella talked about Charlie. He was doing well. Sue also went to radiation with them. Bella didn't even have to cook. She and Sue chatted a little. Sue's daughter Leah had married Bella's friend Jacob a little over a year ago and were expecting already. Leah and Jacob live in Portland while Sue's son Seth is still in school in Olympia. Sue's a widow and now suffering from a little empty nest syndrome so she and Charlie have been _bonding_. Bella would rather use that term rather than the phrase _hooking up_ when it came to her father. But come on, let's call a spade a spade.

"Oh, hey, I know I'll get to see tomorrow, but what did you end up pen-naming Emmett?" I asked. "Which planet?"

Bella smiled devilishly, "I went another direction on that matter."

I looked at her curiously, "How so?"

She grabbed a post it and scrawled _PITA Boy_ on it. "Pita boy?" I asked. "Because of the hummus the other night?" Emmett does love hummus. He loves all kinds of food though.

Bella smirked, "That's what Emmett'll think. It's an acronym though. I just love acronyms."

I liked where Bella was going with this. "So what's PITA stand for then?" I asked unable to contain my eagerness to learn her new acronym.

"Pain in the ass," she smiled. "Or _anus_ if you prefer," she added with a nod.

I grinned and nodded my approval. I even gave her a fist bump. "Very strong, love. Very strong."

Bella laughed, "I thought you'd like. And it's benign enough to not rouse any suspicion on Emmett's part."

"Isabella, you are a little bit of evil," I remarked. "I like it. I'm a little scared, but I still like it."

"Thanks," she said and continued to eat.

But I immediately thought about the bikini again. I wondered if she had something up her sleeve. "Um, you're still wearing the costume right?"

Bella gave me a strange look, "Of course. I told you I would. Why do you ask?"

"Oh…I just wanted to make sure you were…comfortable with it. I know I sort of just sprung it on you," I explained cautiously.

"Ah, well don't worry. I'm perfectly comfortable with it. Thanks for your concern, Edward."

The subject of the bikini dropped after that. I didn't want to dwell on it for too long, afraid she'd change her mind if I kept harping on it. Only one more day and then I'd see my love in a very sexy, barely there Princess Leia costume. And I'd hopefully get to fulfill one of my fantasies.

On Friday, I went to another autopsy and then had an extra cadaver lab that afternoon. Bella and I read the Mars and Venus and PITA Boy column together in the morning and got a good laugh out of the acronym. Emmett called Bella while I was still at home. She put him on speakerphone.

"What the hell is PITA boy, Bella? That's not a planet." I rolled my eyes. Leave it to Emmett to point out the obvious.

"I know, Emmett, but I thought you'd like a whole new identity. Plus, you like hummus. Hummus Boy just didn't have the same ring to it so I went with PITA. It really suits you I think." Bella kept her voice casual while she was playfully shoving me to keep me from cracking up out loud.

"Well…I guess it'll do. It's not terrible and I sound okay in the column don't you think?" There was a smile in his voice.

"Yeah, Emmett. You're awesome in the column. Good work."

"Thanks, Bell-LaLo. We'll see you at the party tonight right? What are you guys going as?"

Bella rolled her eyes as I grinned widely, "Han Solo and Princess Leia," she told him.

"From _Return of the Jedi_? No way! How'd my little brother sweet talk to you into that? Rosalie refused…" Emmett was incredulous as well as impressed. "She said no way in hell would she…"

"We'll see you tonight, Emmett," I cut in and hung up the phone before he unwittingly swayed Bella to renege on the costume. I glanced at Bella to see how she was affected by what Emmett was saying. She was merely chuckling. I'm not sure if she was laughing at Emmett or my reaction.

Later that evening we got dressed for the party separately. My costume was pretty easy to wear. It looked like normal clothes really except for the vest, belt, and holster. I even combed my hair instead of leaving it disheveled in an effort to look more like Harrison Ford.

I was in the bedroom again waiting for Bella to come in. She got dressed in the bathroom again. She was taking a really long time so I went to knock on the door.

"Bella?"

"I'm not wearing this, Edward!" she yelled from the other side of the door. I grimaced. Shoot, she was pissed.

"What's the matter?" I asked trying to play innocent. I guess I couldn't blame her. It really wasn't fair that I was completely clothed and she wouldn't be.

"I'm going to freeze in this…this…_thing_," she grumbled.

"I'll keep you warm, Bella."

"Whatever, Edward. Just go without me." Aww, now I felt bad. She was uncomfortable with it. She just was going along to appease me I guess.

"Bella, I'm not going without you. I'm sorry I made you wear that costume. I was an idiot and I was being selfish," I said to the door.

"How were you being selfish?" she asked still inside the bathroom.

I sighed, "Because I've always had this fantasy of…" I closed my eyes shaking my head. I couldn't believe I was saying this out loud. "Of being with Princess Leia when she was wearing that metal bikini." I felt like such an ass. "I'm sorry I forced it on you. I'll do anything to make it up to you."

There was a pause before she said, "_Anything_?"

"Yes," I said before thinking of any potential repercussions of what was coming out of my mouth. I just didn't want Bella to be upset.

"Can I go as Han Solo and you go as Leia?" she asked meekly.

I made a face. Me in a metal bikini? No way. But my mood brightened. There's no way that bikini would fit me so there's no way I'd be wearing it. "Sure," I answered her.

"_Really_?" Bella asked, clearly she was taken aback by my response.

"Absolutely. Anything for you, Bella," I said.

"It probably won't fit you," she commented. I was smiling on my side of the door.

"Oh yeah. That's too bad, huh? Should we just stay home or go in regular clothes?"

"No, we need to go. Hal would kill me. You know what? I'll be Leia," she said defeated.

"Are you sure, Bella?"

"Yes, I'm sure."

"Well, I'll totally make this up to you. I know how uncomfortable you are in this costume."

"Yes, you'll owe me big time, mister!" she yelled through the door. "You'll have to be _my slave_."

"Yes, I'll be your slave, Bella. Will you come out now?"

I heard her sigh, "Okay. Are you ready to see me as Leia?"

_Hell yeah! _"Whenever you're ready, love," I answered.

I finally saw the doorknob turn and suddenly the door was thrown open the same time Bella yelled out, "Gotcha, _SUCKER_!" She was laughing and ruffling my carefully combed hair. Bella was dressed as Leia the whole time except she wasn't wearing the bikini, she was wearing Leia's white robe dress. It looked stunning on her. I had to laugh myself. She got me good.

"When did you get that?" I asked.

"As soon as I could right after you showed me the bikini." She rolled her eyes at me, "As if I would wear that outfit amongst people, Edward. Do you not know me at all?" Bella smacked my arm but she wasn't mad, she was still smiling.

"Well, I hoped. It was only a glimmer of hope, but I held onto it. And then you said you'd wear it. I was floored. You were about to make one of my fantasies come true. But you look beautiful in this white dress, love," I told her as I kissed her softly.

"Thank you, Edward. I told you the truth you know. I'll wear the bikini, but only for you."

The corners of my mouth started to pull up.

"In fact," Bella continued. "I've got the bikini on now. Do you want to see?"

My jaw dropped and I swallowed hard. "Absolutely," I managed to utter.

"Well then follow me, Han," Bella said with a smirk. She wasn't wearing the chain but she put it around my neck and pulled me along as she walked backwards down the hall to the bedroom.

Once we were in the bedroom Bella pulled the chain a little harder in effect pulling me to her. My hands landed on her waist and my mouth crashed into hers. Bella let go of the chain as the kiss grew more intense. Her fingers tracing the contours of my body while my hands quickly found her bottom. I squeezed and kneaded her behind while pulling her dress up at the same time. Bella knew what I was after. She undid her belt, letting it drop to the floor. Once the belt was out of the way I could easily pull the dress up and over her head revealing the coveted metal bikini.

My jaw dropped again once I got a good look at Bella in the sexy costume. I couldn't even make an effort to toss the dress to the side once I got it off of her. My mind turned to mush at the sight of Bella and the dress merely dropped from my grasp onto the floor as I ogled my fiancé. My already tight black pants were getting even tighter. I needed to have her so badly. I reached for Bella, but she had other plans.

"Not so fast, there, Han," she reprimanded while wagging a finger at me. "You're my slave remember? You can't touch me without my permission." Aww, man she wanted to play a little game. Bella was being so sexy. Any other time I would have been up for it (no pun intended) but I really just wanted to ravish her then and there.

"What happens if I don't wait for permission and take you right now?" I countered. The small gasp that Bella let out told me all I needed to know. Her resolve to keep up a domineering pretense was very thin. I knew I could probably make her come just by talking in that vein. But I planned to make her come the old fashioned way.

"Edward, I mean, Han," she said in what was supposed to be a warning tone. I arched a brow. Yep, I had her.

I started undressing as I continued to talk. First, the vest came off. "What if I said screw your little slave rule and chained you up?" I kicked my shoes off as I walked slowly towards Bella. I pulled my shirt over my head and threw it aside as Bella slowly backed away from me with the smallest hint of a smile on her perfectly full lips.

"What if I started touching your soft, supple body without your giving me the go ahead?" I asked as I undid the belt and took the holster off.

Bella swallowed and bit her bottom lip. Damn, I love when she does that. Bella backed up against the bed and fell backwards onto her elbows as I inched toward her. Her breasts were pushed forward and the red fabric that hung from the bikini bottom hid her from me. My pants were off now and so were my boxer briefs. She could see how aroused I was. I was getting harder by the second seeing her splayed across the bed clad in the sexy metal bikini.

I took a second to enjoy and appreciate the view. The bikini top made of green fabric and gold metal fit her breasts nicely. While I love seeing Bella's perfect mounds typically, I wanted to leave the costume on her. I lifted the red veil that was between her legs and placed it to the side. My god, she was commando once again as the bikini bottom wasn't truly a bottom. There was merely a curtain, a very sexy curtain of red satin separating the two of us.

"What if I said fuck the no touching rule and put my hand here," I asked placing one hand at her entrance, collecting some of the wetness on my finger tip, bringing it up to my mouth and tasting her. I licked my lips. "And here," I said placing my other hand on her left breast rubbing and pinching her hard peak through the fabric, negotiating around the metal as my fingers on my other hand slipped inside her folds and continued to work her.

Bella was making my favorite whimpering and moaning sounds as her body arched towards mine. Those sounds made me ache for her even more.

"What if I said I'll touch you any damn way I feel like and I'll fuck you any which way I choose?" I said into Bella's ear.

"Oh, god, Edward," Bella breathed as her body writhed at my touch. I loved that I could elicit these sounds and movements from her. I love that I'm the only man that has touched her in this way. I love that she is the only woman I've felt so comfortable and so in love with to do or say any of these otherwise lewd acts.

"What, Bella? What is it you want?"

"I need you, Edward. Take me. Please," Bella moaned as she closed her eyes and bucked her hips up.

"Come here," I breathed as I pulled her up from the bed. "I want you to see how beautiful you are when you come for me."

I stood Bella in front of her vanity facing the mirror as I stood behind her. I pushed the red satin curtain that was on the backside away as I slowly backed her onto me while I entered Bella from behind. We both let out a moan as I was fully sheathed inside her. Bella bent forward slightly to allow me better access and movement as I quickly set to work thrusting in and out. My mouth and tongue left open-mouthed kisses wherever they landed on Bella's neck and shoulders while Bella wrapped her arms around my neck. Her head was thrown back in ecstasy while her still covered breasts were begging for my touch. One hand went there while my other massaged her most sensitive spot.

Bella met my thrusts with backward bucks of her own as we both grew closer to release.

"Look at us, Bella," I commanded her as I unwrapped her arms from around my neck and placed them on the vanity so she was forced to watch us in the reflection of the mirror. I was watching Bella's reaction in the mirror as well. The sight of us engaging in _more_ must have sent her over the edge because one thrust later Bella's body tensed up as she all but screamed my name. She had been biting her lip but her mouth fell open slightly when she climaxed, letting out an erotic moan. Bella had been watching me in the mirror and I her. The look on her face was so hot when she found her release, I came hard right after her uttering god and Bella in the same breath.

I rested my body on Bella's as we collected our breaths. Once our breathing returned to normal, I pulled out. Bella turned around to face me while hopping up to sit on the vanity. She had a big smile on her face matching the one on mine. She spread her legs allowing the satin to fall between her thighs. I took it as an invitation to come in a little closer. Bella wrapped her arms around my neck, and I leaned in for a kiss.

"Did I fulfill your little fantasy, Edward?" Bella asked me.

"Mmm. And then some. Thank you, Bella. I don't think we could have had a better ride on the Millennium Falcon," I grinned.

**A/N Alrighty then. There you go. How was it? I mean the chapter in general as well as the lemon freshness? Go have your cigarette and then Review please. Oh yeah, the pictures of the costumes are also on my profile page if you're interested. You know you are! Until next time, readers!**


	18. Something Like a Phenomenon

**A/N I do not own Twilight. I am only borrowing some characters.**

**I know. I know. I've taken longer than usual to update. But in my defense, I'm student teaching right now (only three weeks left though) and I'm not going to lie, the 3rd** **graders are kicking my ass. I'm holding my own, but they can be such complete PITAs. They also drain me of my mojo, which is why this chapter took so long. I haven't had the energy or the inspiration to write. But, I shall persevere and overcome. I hope. Pray for me, readers.**

**Moving on…So, you guys were fans of the punking. So glad a lot of you enjoyed the last chapter. Has anyone else used **_**PITA boy**_**? Aren't acronyms wonderful? I've adopted it into my lexicon.**

**Without further ado, here's the next installment. I just reposted this chapter. It's new and improved in that I have an official beta in LLAMAS WILL RULE THE WORLD, who is the bomb for fixing my errors. Thanks, LWRTW. And readers…Don't forget to REAR.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 19**

**BPoV**

I couldn't help but feel a little smug about putting one over on Edward. I was shocked, to say the least, when I first saw the costume. Correction: the _alleged_ costume. There was nothing to it. I'd seen handkerchiefs that would have covered me better. And he expected me to wear that to the party? Ridiculous.

I have to say though, the bikini yielded great results in the _more_ department, but there was no way I would show complete and not so complete strangers that much flesh.

Edward and I were fashionably late to the soiree due to some…_distractions_. What wonderful distractions they were though. Hal didn't seem to notice that we were late. He and Shane were the belles of the ball. Literally. Well, Hal was anyway. Hal dressed as Belle from _Beauty and the Beast_. Shane refused to look beastly so he was the handsome prince that the Beast turned back into. Hal's dress was quite fancy, and I swear he walked better in heels than I did.

Diddy was even dressed up as Elvis. They must have coordinated with Alice and Jasper because Mina was dressed as Priscilla. Well, that's what they said Mina was anyway. I don't know how you dress a dog up like Priscilla Presley. They'd have been better off dressing her like a doughnut. From what I'd read, Elvis even did commercials or some sort of endorsements for doughnuts.

Alice and Jasper dressed as Scarlet O'Hara and Rhett Butler respectively. That was right up Jasper's alley, and Alice looked stunning of course, taking no shortcuts and actually wearing a corset. As if she needed one. And Jasper was taking the role playing to a whole new level. Anytime anyone asked him if he needed anything to eat or drink, Jasper would quote, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." Admittedly, it was entertaining, but when his own fiancé asked if they should go home since it was getting late, he answered in the same manner**,** earning him a spot on the couch for the night most likely.

Emmett and Rosalie came as Joey Buttafuoco and Amy Fisher. Now that was funny. Rosalie went all out and wore fishnet stockings with an acid washed denim miniskirt and yellow pumps. She looked straight up 80's with the frizzy hair on her brunette wig ratted out. Emmett donned fake curly chest hair as well as a black wig with super tight curls. He was both appalling and amusing.

Alice and Rosalie both had asked me what the deal was with _PITA boy_ because Emmett was rather proud of the strange moniker. He signed autographs using his penname for them, even saving one for Esme. He was borderline cocky, and therefore, annoying and on the fast track to being relegated to the sofa for the night as well, according to Rosalie.

Once they had learned the acronym and how it came to be, Alice, Rosalie, and Jasper had no issue with referring to Emmett by his penname. Emmett seemed a little confused when they'd call him PITA boy and then snicker, but he chalked it up to the special punch Hal and Shane were serving.

Speaking of the special punch, Hal had indulged. That was clear. Good thing he didn't need to drive anywhere and could pass out in his own home. He was hanging all over everyone, but he was particularly interested in speaking **–** correction, _slurring - _to Edward and me. Mostly he was trying to convince me to do the remodel. Actually, he wasn't trying to convince me. He was telling me that it was his intention to remodel. It _was_ his building after all. He informed me that I wouldn't be able to change his mind once it was made**, **so really there wasn't a point, especially since he was already three sheets to the wind.

"Baby girl, that's what I'm doing. I've got the blueprints already. It'll look identical to our place here. You and Mr. X will be living large." Hal put an arm around both Edward and me. He had told us this three times prior. I rolled my eyes at Edward and just humored Hal since he was so drunk.

I patted his arm and said, "Okay, Hal. Whatever you say," thinking he'd forget all about this the next day. Right. Not so much.

That evening though, after we had lefty the party, Edward asked me the meaning behind the _Mr. X_ nickname**,** since it wasn't the first time he'd heard or read Hal refer to him as such. I recalled the text message from Hal in which he compared my _Mr. X_ to Cedric Diggory, AKA Rob Pattinson.

I didn't really want to get into it, but I told Edward how Hal and I had bonded over boy troubles over four years ago. "Hal referred to his guy as _Mr. Why _while I referred to you as _Mr. X," _I explained quietly_. _Edward and I were already in bed so it was dark and he couldn't see me blush with embarrassment and fresh humiliation, though I could feel the heat fill my face. I wondered if Edward could feel it as well. Even though Edward and I were together now, I still didn't want to go back down that road or revisit the senior year debacle. I silently hoped that Edward wouldn't question it further. I should have known better.

After a quiet moment of mulling things over, Edward responded by apologizing, which I really didn't want him to do. "I'm sorry, Bella," he said as he kissed the top of my head.

I buried my face in the crook of his neck and kissed the skin there. "Don't apologize, Edward," I murmured.

"But I…"

"No," I interrupted him. "It's all for the best in the end, right? If any of that stuff hadn't happened, I never would have met Hal, and I'd be down a great friend as well as an apartment right now." It was true. I suppose it wasn't in the cards for Edward and me all those years ago. I was coming to terms with that thought**,** though it still hurt to think about. I think that**, **no matter how much you grow as a person, the latent OCD in all of us keeps us from letting certain things go. I wondered if I'd ever be able to think back on that time and not feel any heaviness in my heart.

Edward gripped me a little tighter, "I can tell you don't really want to talk about this, but let me just ask once and if you answer, I won't bring it up again, okay, love?"

I sighed and swallowed to steel myself. I wasn't sure what Edward was going to ask, but I knew it'd make me feel more than just a little bit uncomfortable. "Okay," I agreed.

"Did you avoid me on purpose the end of our senior year?"

Edward cut right to the chase didn't he? I bit my lip as I felt a pang of sadness and regret pierce my heart. After a moment, I answered simply, "Yes."

Edward sighed as he accepted my reply. I could feel him nodding his head infinitesimally as if he were confirming information he already had. "And you left for Arizona to escape…_me_?"

I closed my eyes and took another deep breath. "Mmmhmm," I answered morosely. It was very strange. Part of me really wanted Edward to know that and feel bad about it, yet at the same time, I felt guilty about wanting that to happen. I was thankful the lights were off. Yes, we were talking to each other, but we were also just talking into the darkness. The lack of light, of not having to look Edward in the eye as I answered**,** made it so much easier to answer.

"Bella, I'm sorry Charlie is sick, but I'm so thankful you came back."

"Me too," I said. For whatever reason, maybe the reminder of my father's condition, maybe reminder of what happened four years ago, a small, stupid tear escaped my eye. Why'd everything have to be so bittersweet?

Edward must have felt the moisture as the tear rolled off my face and onto his collarbone. He backed off me just a little as if to get a closer look at me. Had the lights been on, he would have gotten that glimpse.

"I'll never hurt you again," Edward vowed softly.

"I know," I managed to utter and smile ruefully right before his mouth found mine. We said goodnight after that gentle kiss, and true to his word, Edward never brought it up again, though something tells me he thinks about that episode more than he'll admit.

For as much as Hal drank and as tipsy as he was the night before, he was shockingly alert and in good spirits the next day. He was quite the freak of nature**,** I'd say.

Edward and I were eating cereal and just sitting around in our pajamas still when Hal came downstairs with a huge roll of paper. Something told me it wasn't just a social call.

"Morning, my favorite tenants," he sang as he came through the door. Diddy came trotting in after him dressed in a t-shirt that read _Stinky_ on the back of it. Edward and I laughed at how very true that descriptor was. I picked Diddy up. I hadn't gotten to hold him in so long. Edward and I were taking turns scratching behind Diddy's ears as Hal spoke.

"Here in my hot little hands are the blue prints for the remodel." Hal put the paper down on the table and unraveled it.

I made a face when Hal said _blue prints_ because of the subject at hand as well as the odor Diddy was already emitting. I tried pawning Diddy off to Edward, but he laughed and backed away shaking his head. I put the dog down as I pulled my head back. _That_, I did not miss.

"Hal, I don't know what you're talking about," I lied. I even kept a straight face. Hal didn't fall for it though.

"Nope. You can't get out of this, baby. You agreed to it last night," Hal pointed out. "I have witnesses."

I made another face. "Which witnesses? Hal, you were drunk."

Hal blew a raspberry at me before he answered. "Edward and Diddy of course."

I looked at Edward. He shrugged but he was grinning. I gritted my teeth and made a face at him. _Traitor_.

Hal continued as if I had never tried to thwart his efforts. "Shane's other brother is a contractor. He was Fred Astaire last night, remember?"

I vaguely recalled a man with a beautiful woman dressed as Ginger Rogers. I was impressed that a contractor would dress up like Fred Astaire.

"His guys will be here Monday morning. It should take less than a month. You should be able to still live here while it's under construction**,** though I wouldn't be hanging out here while they're knocking down and adding walls. Everything will most likely be done by Thanksgiving."

"Construction's to start so soon, Hal?" I whined. We still hadn't hammered out the details of the cost and then rent.

"Of course. You know I don't mess around once my mind…excuse me, _our minds_ are made up. So, any questions?"

"Cost?" I asked.

Edward and I flinched as Hal proceeded to make a squalling sound reminiscent of a game show buzzer that indicates wrong answers.

"Rent?" Edward asked.

Hal rolled his eyes, sighed audibly, and crossed his arms over his chest. "Moving on…"

Edward and I looked at each other, both of us clearly frustrated with Hal's snubs.

"Is there even a way to get out of this?" I asked no one in particular.

I gave both Hal and Edward an exasperated look. Edward put his arm around me in an attempt to soothe me. As much as Hal was annoying us, Edward wanted the remodel to happen. "I really think this'll be for the best. The extra space will be nice for whenever we have visitors." _Traitor!_

"See, Edward's on board. Come on Bella. There's no point whining or pouting, and I don't want you to start twitching again, but you may as well resign yourself to the fact that you're going to double your living space and love it," Hal insisted.

I narrowed my eyes at Hal and grudgingly spat out, "Fine." I couldn't seem to stop the crazy train that was Hal. I had to either jump aboard or get run over. He was right. There really was no point in arguing. I'd just be wasting my time.

The weeks leading up to Thanksgiving were indeed filled with the sounds of construction. Hal wasn't lying, and Shane's brother didn't mess around**,** either. Sure**,** they were already familiar with the blue print and floor plan since it was identical to Hal and Shane's place, but Shawn and his people were actually quite efficient. Three weeks was all it took. Edward and I spent the entire time still living there save for the first couple of days when they had to knock down two walls. Alice and Jasper let us stay with them.

I'd never confess it to Hal, but I warmed up quickly to the idea of the expansion. I mean, I got my own bathroom, and what woman doesn't want her own bathroom? Well, it was the master bath, but I claimed it as my own. I'd occasionally allow Edward to use it.

And this expansion slash remodel didn't leave us with just a bigger apartment, it was an uber-space. We had rooms for guests to stay in as well as a separate office with a desk for each of us as well as built-in shelving (a secret fantasy of mine) for all of our books so one room didn't have to do double duty in that respect. We even had space in the living room for a piano for Edward. He ha**d** one at his parents' house and wanted one here in Seattle**,** but just didn't have room for it in his old apartment. It pained me a little to admit, but Hal was a genius, once again.

Hal was very aggravating at the same time though. Obviously. We still hadn't talked about the issue of rent until the remodel was finally done. Even then**,** when I asked Hal how much more we'd be paying a month, he just looked at me like he didn't understand the question. Even Edward tried to get Hal to see reason. Edward attempted to pay for the contractors as well, but to no avail.

"This is my building, and I wanted to remodel the fifth floor. I don't know what you two are trying to pull," Hal said to us.

"He's insane," Edward remarked one day after Hal once again rebuffed Edward's attempt to, at the very least, chip in. Like he had just figured it out.

I looked at Edward as if _he_ were insane. "What have I been telling you, Edward?"

"How can he not want anything in return for all that he's done?" Edward seemed genuinely disconcerted.

I snorted. _Welcome to my world. _"Well now, he didn't say he didn't _want_ anything. He just doesn't want money. I wouldn't be surprised if he asked for a kidney or a lung one day," I joked. "I hope you're a match to his blood type."

The Tuesday before Thanksgiving Edward and I had the others over for LaLo night. We had to do it early because of the holiday. Edward and I were going to Jacksonville the next day to visit Renee and then coming back on Friday night to have a postponed Thanksgiving with his family and Charlie. We also wanted to show our friends the completed uber-space.

Everyone was thoroughly impressed with the new apartment. Alice commented on how they could all move in with us. It was probably true, though I don't think there'd be room for her wardrobe**,**or Rosalie's for that matter. There probably wasn't even room for their shoe collections even.

"All we need is a pool table and I'm ready to call this place the HQ," Emmett said.

"HQ, Emmett? Headquarters for what exactly?" I asked.

"Oh, you know, good times."

I made a face. "I don't think I like the idea of my home being the HQ for _good times_. It just sounds kind of sleazy."

"Get your head out of the gutter, Bell-LaLo. I'm talking about fun times. A hang out of sorts. I like hanging out all together here."

"Awww," Alice, Rose and, I all sighed together. That was so sweet. Who knew Emmett was so sentimental?

"Also, you have the espresso machine here," Emmett added. Edward and Jasper both snickered.

"PITA boy rears his ugly head," Rosalie commented with disdain. Everyone chuckled at the nickname, except for Emmett.

"Why do you guys keep laughing when you say PITA boy?" Emmett asked suspiciously as he sipped his double dirty mocha. "Because if didn't know better, I'd think there were some kind of inside shenanigans going on here." He looked around at each of us. We all had a look of either hilarity or feigned confusion.

"I think you're paranoid, Emmett," Jasper said. He was the only one who kept a straight face.

"Oh really?" Emmett countered. "No, I think you guys are up to something." He was nodding to himself. It looked like he was having a silent conversation. "Yeah, I'll get to the bottom of it. Bet." He was now looking at all of us through narrowed eyes.

"Anyway, Bella," Alice butted in to change the subject. "What's LaLo got this time?"

"Hey, Bella, can I use your computer to check my email for school? I forgot to earlier." Emmett asked.

"Sure, Emmett. It's in the office."

So while Emmett went to grab my laptop, I told everyone about a letter to LaLo asking about how to deal with pet peeves.

"So this guy, Steve, writes about how he and his wife have been married for almost a year. They didn't live together prior to the nuptials. Once they moved in together, he discovered that she is a bit of a slob. Not bad, but enough to drive him crazy, like she'll let the dishes or laundry pile up."

"Hmm, has he asked his wife about it?" Jasper asked.

"Yeah. It's not bad enough to where he's contemplating divorce or anything right?" Edward asked.

We ladies looked back and forth from the two of them. We were all three on the same wavelength. Had Emmett been in the room I'm sure he would have said something stupid as well.

Neither of the guys understood the disgusted looks we were throwing at them.

"What?" they asked simultaneously, truly bewildered.

"Um, hello?" Alice asked. "Why doesn't _Steve_ do anything about it himself?"

"Yeah, his sorry ass is obviously just waiting around for his _woman_ to do all the domestic work." Rosalie opined. "Idiot."

"Hey wait. How do you know Steve hasn't done anything about it," Jasper asked.

"Because," I chimed in, "if Steve were doing something about it, he wouldn't have the time to write a letter to LaLo complaining about his wife or asking how to deal with it. He should just deal."

"Yeah!" Rose and Alice both agreed. "Idiot," they both added.

"Besides," I continued, "We all have silly little quirks that should be overlooked by anyone who loves us right?"

"Right," my girls agreed again.

"Like what?" Edward asked.

"Well, like, we all know that our Alice here has a very strong affinity to retail therapy," I pointed out. "And we all still love her. Rose too right?"

The girls nodded. They recognized their affliction and were all right with it.

"What did you just say?" Emmett asked. He must have caught the tail end of my comment.

"Alice and Rosalie enjoy shopping immensely," I clarified.

"You speak the truth, Bell-LaLo," Emmett nodded. I noticed he didn't have my computer. He must have just checked in the office.

"And Jasper is annoyingly calm and logical about everything," Alice said. Jasper gave her a sideways glance. "I love you, Jazz, but sometimes when I vent, especially about my bridezillas, I want you to just listen and not try to reason out why they are the way they are. Why must there be an underlying problem? Why can't they just be crazy bitches?"

"I understand what you're saying, Alice," Jasper nodded.

"See? Right there. You're doing it again," Alice said pointing at her fiancé. We all laughed. It was true. You could always count on Jasper to not fly off the handle.

"Well, Emmett is goofy but always loveable," Rosalie said. She smiled at Emmett. She leaned in for a quick peck on the lips, but Emmett pulled his head back. That was an unusual move.

"Oh, now I'm loveable after you all had a good laugh over PITA at my expense?"

Uh-oh. "So you know what PITA stands for, Emmett?" I asked remorsefully.

"Yep. And I do not appreciate it. It's so vulgar. I really didn't expect it from you, Bella." He sounded so disappointed in me. I felt kind of bad, but really I didn't think it was that hurtful.

"I'm sorry, Emmett," I apologized. "It was out of fun…"

"You think it's fun to call me a vagina?" he asked scornfully.

"I…what?" I asked. I was confused as were the rest of my friends.

"Don't play dumb, Bella. I looked up PITA in the urban dictionary online when I was in the nerd sanctuary that is your office. It's Portuguese slang for _vagina_." Emmett made a face.

I snorted and laughed along with everyone else. I then tried to keep a straight face, "It is?"

"Yes, it is," he looked around at us. "Isn't that what you all have been laughing about?"

"No, but I like that better than _pain in the ass_," Edward laughed.

Jasper couldn't resist throwing a friendly jab at his soon-to-be brother-in-law. "You'd be the biggest vagina ever."

"The biggest vagina the world has ever seen," Alice sputtered through her hysterics.

I had to join in now. I was laughing pretty hard but managed to choke out, "You'd be a phenomenon…Emmett, you'd be a _vag-omenon_!" Apparently it was articulate enough for everyone to understand. Rosalie was literally rolling on the floor laughing. Emmett even cracked a smile at my newly coined word. Yep, this was the result of too much caffeine.

We all were able to calm down after a couple of minutes until Rosalie admitted, "I think I just peed myself. Just a little." And we all laughed at her then.

"_Pain in the ass_, huh?" Emmett asked once we were calm again.

"Yep," I replied. "That was the original acronym for PITA."

"Oh, well, I'd rather be that than a _vag-omenon_ any day." We all nodded and managed to stifle any more laughter. "But can we just make me Saturn or something from now on Bella?" Emmett asked.

I smiled, "Sure, Emmett. Good idea. Henceforth, you shall be referred to as Saturn when reviewing for Mars and Venus," I declared.

"Sweet! So what were you talking about before the vagomenon?" Emmett asked.

"Pet peeves and little idiosyncrasies," I said. "We came up with something for you four, but I can't think of one for Edward though."

"Edward's easy to think of one for," Emmett scoffed. "He's slow." I just gave Emmett a strange look, but Edward was nodding in agreement with his brother.

"That's true," Alice agreed as well.

I looked at Edward next to me. He gave me a sheepish grin that translated to both rueful and apologetic, and I fully understood what they were saying.

"Better late than never," I commented and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks," he whispered. Our eyes locked briefly as we shared a moment.

"What about Bella?" Emmett asked.

"She's perfect," Edward retorted.

"Psshh," came out from not only myself but Alice and Rosalie as well. I'm sure if Coley were with us we'd be getting a mouthful. As it was, my girlfriends knew my issues.

"What?" Edward asked confused. I looked at him and then the other two guys who wisely kept their mouths shut for the time being.

"I've got plenty of quirks," I pointed out.

"Like?" Edward urged.

I opened my mouth but Alice jumped in first. "Like her inability to see herself clearly." I gave Alice a strange look. "Isn't that what you were going to say?" she asked me. I shook my head and began to open my mouth again.

"How about her absurd inability to accept gifts without going completely _Bella_ about it?" Rosalie offered. I gave her a look as well. "Oh, not what you were going to say?" I shook my head.

"Your freakishly frigid feet?" Edward asked brightly.

"You're klutziness?" Emmett asked right after.

"You wear dark blue a lot," Jasper put in.

"No," I pouted. Wow, I do have some issues don't I? I started laughing and shaking my head. "I wasn't going to say any of those things." They all looked at me encouragingly. I rolled my eyes and felt the blush on my face.

"And you blush a lot too," Emmett said.

"Shut up, Emmett," I giggled. "I was going to say that I'm freakishly OCD about grammar and linguistics."

"Example," Alice demanded.

"Well, I'd tell you not to laugh at me, but you guys actually not laughing wouldn't happen. Anyway, for example, I get really crazy and angry in the grocery store when I see the the _10 Items or Less_sign at the checkout."

"Why?" Emmett asked genuinely confused.

"Because it's supposed to read _10 Items or FEWER._ If you can count the items it's _fewer_, but if you can't count it, like water, it's _less_," I shuddered. "It makes me so nuts and I fantasize about changing it with a magic marker or calling it to the manager's attention," I finished.

I looked around. They all stared back at me blankly. I've never admitted that to anyone. I knew I sounded crazy.

"Wow, Bells. You're an even bigger geek than my brother," Emmett sounded astonished.

"I know!" I agreed as everyone, including me, broke out into another fit of laughter. There was no denying it. I was a supreme geek.

"That's okay, love. You're in good company," Edward assured me as he pulled me to him and kissed my burning cheek. He was still shaking with laughter.

**A/N There you go. Just a bit of a fluff fix for the weekend. REAR why don'tcha? Sorry again for taking so long to get this one out. Forgive me?**


	19. Cookie Throw Down

**A/N I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I do not own Twilight.**

**Well, I thought and thought, and decided to keep going with some fluff because it's fun to write. Why am I bringing this up? I originally was going to do a 180 and start some drama. Perhaps the PITAs had gotten me down. I will save the drama for my mama or perhaps ease it in somehow. Not sure yet. But my sister pointed out that I can't go from vagomenon to killing people off. True, true. That's gotta be some kind of breach of writing etiquette or something right? In the mean time, enjoy the fluff.**

**I know it's shorter than my usual chapters, but I wanted to give you guys a little something since I hadn't updated in a while. You know I usually put a chapter out a week, but as you know I've been drained from my PITA 3****rd**** graders. The upside is, I only have 8 days left of student teaching! Yea me!**

**Hope you like this shorty. There's another Saving Me reference for those in the know. You'll see. Hehe. REAR please.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 20**

**BPoV**

Thanksgiving was always the best holiday. Most people loved Christmas or Halloween, but for me, Thanksgiving was where it was at. No presents. No commercial influence. It was just being with family, eating until your pants were too tight, lounging, napping, and then eating some more. And then there was always the occasional cook off. More on that later.

It was Eli's first Thanksgiving with Mom and Phil, or M-R and D-P for _Mama Renee and Daddy Phil._ That was just another attribute of Eli's that made me appreciate and love him even more. He was eight years old and already using acronyms, bless him.

Edward and I had such a great time those two days we were in Jacksonville. It was hard to believe it was the end of November, the weather was so nice in Florida. Edward and I played catch with Eli. Yes, I actually played catch. It wasn't pretty, but I did it even if it was just for a little while and I nearly broke my nose. I sucked at playing catch.

We went to a movie, _Hotel for Dogs_, we took him swimming, and we played games. Lots and lots of games. Edward and I had a blast because it was like we were eight again playing Connect Four, Battleship, Go Fish, and Operation. Eli's laugh was infectious. He cracked up when he or any of us hit the sides of the Operation game with the little tongs. I must admit, that buzzing still startled me as well.

I was sad when we left for Seattle, but I felt comforted knowing I'd see them again for Alice's wedding mid-December. Mom, Phil, and Eli would stay with us, and we would celebrate an early Christmas.

Thanksgiving in Forks was also a lot of fun. We celebrated on the Saturday following Thanksgiving Day at Carlisle and Esme's home. They were kind enough to invite Charlie and Sue over as well. Well, Charlie having dinner over there wasn't a strange occurrence since Esme all but forced Charlie to stop by for dinner at least every other night. Esme was so sweet. She was just as worried about my dad as I was and wanted to make sure he stayed well nourished.

Charlie was still doing just fine in the cancer department. He was a fighter after all. And he and Sue seemed to really enjoy each other's company. I didn't want to hear any details of just how well they were getting along, but I hadn't seen my dad that happy in a long time, probably not since I moved in with him during high school. I knew Charlie had a hard time of it after Renee and he split up, and I was happy he could find companionship once again.

During dinner, Edward and I filled everyone in on Eli. Charlie was especially interested ever since I told him about my new brother a couple months prior. Charlie was genuinely happy for Renee and Phil and was excited to meet Eli, perhaps it was because I told him Eli wanted to be a policeman when he grew up. Or it could have been because Charlie had always wanted a son to bond with (though he'd never admit it) as I never enjoyed watching sports or fishing. Charlie used to take me fishing, but I showed my disdain for it early on. We settled on an understanding when I came to visit him in Forks while I was growing up: he'd fish and I would read a book instead as I sat next to him. I guess it was our way of bonding, in silence. Strange maybe, but it worked for us. Charlie and I loved each other, of course, but we just never had what you'd call a heart to heart conversation. Charlie was never what one would consider a touchy feely kind of guy.

Since our Thanksgiving dinner was postponed, Emmett had apparently passed the time during the actual holiday by watching Food Network. He must have watched one too many baking shows and felt extremely confident in his abilities because he had the nerve to challenge me to a bake off. I was not much of a baker as I preferred to cook instead, but I could definitely hold my own.

"Emmett, I didn't know you baked," I commented after everyone, including his own mother laughed when Emmett made the initial challenge.

"I don't, Bells, but the Barefoot Contessa makes it look so easy. Plus, if Bobby Flay can do it, I can too. I'm challenging you to a chocolate chip cookie throwdown, sister!"

I had to laugh. "You're on, Emmett. What are the parameters of this little bet?"

Emmett had an evil glint in his eyes. "If I win, I get the espresso machine."

I made a face. "Emmett, you could buy your very own espresso machine you know? Why do you feel the need to try to win mine?" How ridiculous was that? Emmett could buy five of them if he were so inclined.

"Nah, Bessy's already broken in."

I stared at Emmett for a moment. "When did you name my espresso machine?"

"And more importantly, why?" Edward asked.

Emmett merely shrugged. "Because I love her and she deserves a name."

We looked at Rosalie, who nodded as if her husband's explanation made perfect sense.

"Oookay…what do I get when I win?" I asked smugly. No one missed my confident remark as another round of chuckling erupted from the dinner table.

Emmett scowled at me though. "Well, _if_ you win, I'll take you and Eddie boy out to get a new dog since Big Gay…"

"_Emmett!_" I snarled in a warning tone. He knew how I felt about calling Hal by that nickname. I didn't care how okay Hal was with it, I still didn't like it.

Emmett put his hands up as if he were conceding and corrected himself, "Since your happy friends commandeered the stinky Diddy."

I smiled at Edward ruefully, who smiled back at me. I missed the stinky Diddy, and he did too. We were ready to be doggy parents again. "Game on, Emmett."

While everyone was watching college football, Emmett and I were in Esme's kitchen for the next hour and a half. I had a simple and fool proof recipe that I used while Emmett had a slightly more complex recipe (from what I could tell) he had written down from when he was watching the Barefoot Contessa earlier in the week. Esme was in the kitchen with us refereeing. She didn't offer any advice or help. The rest of the family was to do a blind taste test. Well, that was the plan originally, but after the first taster, no one else wanted to do it.

The first and only victim was Charlie. He was the only one brave enough to voluntarily try one of Emmett's creations. We put a blindfold on my dad. Esme handed him one of mine first. Charlie bit, chewed, swallowed and smiled, "That was pretty good. Good texture, not too soft and not too hard." I smiled smugly at Emmett once again while Edward patted my back proudly.

Esme handed Charlie one of Emmett's. Though we couldn't see Charlie's eyes, we could tell that he had a perplexed expression upon his face by the looks of his slightly frowning mouth. It was as if he was trying to figure out a puzzle. I bit my lips to keep from laughing.

Emmett's cookie wasn't the daintiest looking pastry. In fact, it resembled more of a scone than a cookie. After fingering the alleged cookie for a few seconds, my dad took a bite. It was slightly harder than my cookie. Actually, it was much harder than my cookie. It had the crunchiness of biscotti. He chomped into the cookie and began to chew. His jaw went up and down exactly two times before he stopped chewing all together. Charlie must have remembered his manners though because he finished chewing the rest of the cookie quickly before chugging an entire glass of milk as a chaser.

I put my fist over my mouth to really keep from losing it. My dad took the blindfold off to more closely examine what he had just consumed. The room was quiet other than a couple stray snickers coming from Emmett's sibling's, wife and, well, everyone really.

"What's wrong with it?" Emmett asked sounding a little hurt and definitely confused.

"Um, well, son, I'm no cook," Charlie qualified before he finished his statement. "But, I'd say you forgot to put in the sugar."

The rest of us then erupted in actual laughter at this point.

"What? No way!" Emmett countered in disbelief as he reached for a cookie and took a bite. He immediately made a face and spat the cookie out into a napkin. "Aww, bloody hell! How'd I forget the most important ingredient? Bella, you must have switched out the sugar for salt," he accused.

My mouth fell open, shocked at Emmett's accusation. "What? I did no such thing, Emmett. I don't know why your cookies are puffy and nasty, but it's not because of me. Besides, Esme was in the kitchen the whole time supervising!" I pointed out.

Everyone looked at Esme, who was still giggling. "Emmett, I wanted to tell you, dear, but I wasn't supposed to offer any help remember?"

Emmett narrowed his eyes at Esme and shook his head mumbling, "My own mother turns on me. It must be some kind of…_estrogen bind_," he spat. "You wanted Bella to win because of feminism and girl power I'll bet," he said with disdain. "_Women!_"

We were all cracking up still. "_Estrogen bind, _Emmett?" Edward asked. "Where do you come up with this stuff?"

Esme hugged her eldest son. "Darling, I'm sorry your cookies are puffy and bad, but it wasn't a conspiracy, I assure you. And your father and I didn't raise you to be this sore loser." Emmett accepted her hug, albeit reluctantly and with a pouty expression.

So the rest of the holiday was spent razzing Emmett about his bad uncookies. I lost count of all the doorstop and paperweight jokes. Meanwhile, Edward and I researched dogs online since we'd be getting a new puppy, courtesy of my future brother-in-law. Bless his non baking heart.

**A/N Again, sorry for the brevity of this non-chapter. I had a little extra energy (from where? I don't know) and wanted to write to unwind. Plus, I really like to write Emmett, and this seemed mindless enough. I'll be working on Eli's visit, Alice's wedding, and the new dog for the next chapter so stay tuned! Thanks for reading and for all those who have put my story on alert and/or on your favorites list. I really appreciate it! And Llama, I really tried to keep it consistent this time. Thanks for your help!**


	20. Pretty Woman

**A/N I don't own anything called Twilight, and I am clearly not Stephenie Meyer.**

**The estrogen bind lives on! Hope you liked the cookie throw down. Good mindless fun right? That's what I'm all about. You looking for drama? Keep on looking.**

**I'm in good spirits right now, thanks for asking. It's a 3-day weekend and upon the return of the work week, I'll only have FOUR (4) days left of student teaching!!!!!!! Smurfin' A, man! This is me doing a happy dance. Also, with my hubs and I teaching plus the daughter in pre-school we have candy from three different Valentine's Day parties that amounts to more candy than at Halloween. So, I'm feeling pretty wired. You've been sufficiently warned. And yes, there's some lemonade up in here. Not bad though. You'll see. Don't forget to REAR.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 21**

**BPoV**

"Bella? Are you okay?"

I could hear Edward's smooth, melodic voice, laced with concern, but I couldn't see him. That was because my eyes were closed. How long had they been closed? I wasn't sure. Neither was Edward. The last time I saw him, he was off to class at eight in the morning. I recalled him kissing me goodbye and telling me he'd be back in the afternoon. Was it afternoon already? I remembered going into the Times to check in with Gerald. Yes, it was all coming back to me, slowly but surely. It seemed as if everyone in the office had a cold so I was trying to be extra cautious, only touching things on my desk and pushing doors open with my body instead of using my hands, but as I rounded a corner while talking with Gerald…

"I was hit," I said groggily. I tried opening my eyes, but they were very heavy.

"What was that, love?" Edward asked as he placed the back of his hand on my warm and sweaty forehead. His cool skin on my feverish face felt so nice. After feeling my forehead he slid his hand down to check the temperature on my cheek and then neck.

"Creepy Eric sneezed on me," I clarified as I finally got my eyelids open. Edward's green eyes met mine, and he held a slight frown on his otherwise perfect face.

"Creepy Eric?"

"Yeah, the sports guy at the paper. I was walking and talking to Gerald, we rounded a corner when he sneezed on me coming from the other direction. It was at precisely 9:17." I spoke very slowly and deliberately. I felt winded from only three sentences.

Edward gave me a strange look so I continued. I couldn't blame him. I would have given me a strange look too. Who memorized the exact moment they caught a cold or flu?

"I only know it was at 9:17 because I remember thinking _Oh, fuck! Note the time_."

Again, I didn't go around dropping the f-bomb, but I was irritated, to say the least, because I had been so diligent about not trying to catch anything, and there I was with my mouth partially open, mid-sentence, and the idiot sneezed on me. Plus, I was entirely too exhausted to filter my speech so the profanities slipped out more easily.

"And Creepy Eric has a cold," Edward surmised shaking his head.

Despite his nickname, Creepy Eric was actually a very nice guy. He just happened to stand too close to people when he talked to them, thus invading personal space. He had always been kind to me, but he immediately gained idiot status the second he sneezed on me spreading whatever mutant virus he was harboring.

Anyway, I was pissed after the sneeze and came home as soon as I could, cursing Creepy Eric the entire time I walked back to the HQ where I tried to get some work done but got distracted by Milton, our new bassett hound puppy. He was too cute not to cuddle and play with. Plus, he wasn't gassy at all! Edward and I had had Milton for about week and we were more smitten with him than we ever were with Diddy. I felt guilty for it, but it was true. Aww, poor Diddy.

Milton and I went for a walk around noon so he could do his business, and I could remember feeling unusually tired afterward. My head started to throb and I had gotten the cold sweats. I took a couple Tylenol and then curled up on the couch with Milton.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Three-thirty," Edward answered. "You're very warm. I think you have a fever. Did you take anything?"

"Mmm-hmm. I took a couple Tylenol a little after noon," I tried to sit up but couldn't. "Ugh, why can't I move?" I asked frustrated.

"Well, Milton was laying on your stomach when I came home so he could have prevented you from moving, though I doubt it since he only weighs seven pounds. I'd wager that you have a body ache from the flu," Edward diagnosed. He was holding Milton in one hand while his other one was still resting in the crook of my neck.

"Does your throat hurt?" he asked me.

I tried to shake my head no, but my body wasn't cooperating. "Uh-uh," I managed to mumble.

"Nausea?"

"Uh-uh," I answered again. "I don't throw up even when I feel nauseated. But I'm not nauseated now."

"You don't throw up?"

"Huh-uh. The last time I threw up, I was in third grade when I got dizzy on the merry-go-round on the playground after lunch at recess."

"Third grade? That's an impressive streak, Bella," Edward chuckled.

"Thanks, but I wasn't telling you to brag. I just don't like to throw up so I don't." Edward nodded and I added, "I'd make a terrible bulimic."

"That you would. Let me get you some water. You need your fluids." Edward leaned down to kiss me. Miraculously, I summoned my head to move away and it did. Edward pouted a little.

"I don't want you to get sick too, Edward," I explained.

Edward smiled at me. "Thanks for the concern, love, but I don't get sick."

"Huh?"

He shrugged, "I don't get sick."

"Ever?" I asked. "How?"

"Well, whenever I feel anything coming on, I take extra vitamin C and really down the fluids to flush whatever it is out fast so if I feel sick, it's never more than a day."

"Huh," I grunted. "That would've been sage advice had you told me that yesterday. Now it's just irritating insider information." I tried to think back to our high school days. I couldn't recall a time when Edward stayed home sick. Weird.

"That's a more impressive streak than mine, Edward," I commented.

"Thanks. Can I kiss you now?" I gave him a slight smile and Edward bent down to give me a chaste kiss.

He then left Milton with me so he could go to the kitchen to get me a bottle of water. I heard Edward's phone ring while he was in the there. I listened as I pet Milton's soft tri-colored fur.

"Hey...Yeah, I guess that'd be all right. Bella's sick too, actually. When…He's on his way?" Edward asked sounding confused. "Okay but why…" Edward trailed off as he was listening to whomever he was talking to. His voice turned jubilant as he said, "Wow, that's great, Rose. Congratulations. That's great news. Yes, I'll relay that to Bella. And that too. Okay, take care. We'll see you soon. Call if you need anything. Bye." Edward hung up and was heading back towards me. I was very curious to hear what that conversation was about, and from what I could put together, it sounded like Emmett was on his way over.

"Great news, Bella," Edward grinned. He started to come back to the sofa but was interrupted by the doorbell. It was Emmett. I remained lying on the sofa while Edward got the door. I still couldn't move my body yet; it ached all over.

"Hey, Emmett. Whoa, you look terrible," Edward noted.

"Yeah, thanks, little bro. I feel worse than I look," I heard Emmett mumble as he made his way over to the other sofa. "Hey, Bells. You look like I feel. Do you feel like I look?"

I thought it was an insult, but I wasn't really coherent enough to really decide one way or the other, and I was too miserable to care. "Huh?" was all I could say. I heard Emmett collapse on the opposite sofa with a duffle bag. "Why are you here, Emmett?" It sounded ruder than I intended, but I couldn't help that at the time. Luckily, Emmett didn't take it the wrong way.

"Rose kicked me out."

"What?" I asked with as much emotion as I could muster. It wasn't much. "That's the good news?" I was confused.

"No, I'm out because I'm sick. I can't go back until I feel better. I don't want to get her sick too especially since she's expecting," Emmett mumbled.

"Oh, that's the good news." Now, on the inside, I was very excited to hear this news, but my excitement just couldn't manifest itself superficially since I felt like I had been hit by a semi-truck. "Wow, Emmett, that's so great," I garbled. I don't think I could have sounded more blasé about it though. "I'm sorry you're sick, Em," I whispered.

"I'm sorry you're sick too, Bells. What happened? Whatcha got?" Emmett sounded just as unconcerned though I knew he was concerned.

"Flu, we think. Creepy Eric sneezed on me." My eyes were closed again. I didn't have the energy to keep them open.

"Oh. You want me to kick his ass?" Emmett asked quietly. He may have had his eyes closed as well. "He once misspelled my name in the paper." Apparently that justified an ass kicking in Emmett's book.

"No thanks," I answered. "Like you could in your current condition anyway."

"Well, I'd obviously wait until I felt better to kick his ass."

"I see. So what happened to you?" I asked.

"Stupid germ-infested high school students. The little bastards got me sick."

Edward chuckled, but I tried scolding Emmett. "That's not nice, Emmett," I whispered.

"I don't care. The little bastards did," he repeated with a hint of malice.

"Are you going to kick all of their asses then?" I asked.

"Can't. The law prohibits me from abusing them. I don't think I can even threaten them with a smack down."

"No. You're right. You can't touch them. That sucks."

"I know. How's my nephew, Milton?" Emmett changed subjects.

"He's great," I answered quietly. We heard Edward laughing quietly himself. "What?" I asked.

"You two just sound funny. You're saying things you wouldn't normally say. Bella, you just said it was too bad Emmett can't beat his students, and with absolutely no affect in your voice. It's hilarious, that's all."

"I can't help it. I'm too exhausted to filter my thoughts or put any emotion in my speech," I defended myself.

"Yeah, me too," Emmett said. I tried to furrow my brows, but couldn't. Emmett filtered his thoughts and speech typically? Emmett actually had the ability to do that?

"You have impulse control?" Edward read my thoughts and asked Emmett incredulously. "I'm impressed."

"Huh," I grunted.

"What?" Emmett asked.

"Well, if the crazy stuff that normally comes out of your mouth has been filtered, I'm frightened to imagine you with no filtering system. That's all," I mused and then yawned. "Welcome to the TB ward of the HQ, Emmett. Are you going to sleep on the sofa or do you want an actual bed?"

"I'm fine right here. I don't think I can move anyway." It sounded like Emmett had the flu as well. "Looks like Eddie'll be taking care of two patients. Thanks, bro." Edward had thrown an afghan and a pillow on top of Emmett.

"Don't call me Eddie," was Edward's response.

He then came over to me and very gently slid the pillow under my head and tucked another blanket around me, placed Milton back on the sofa next to me, and kissed my forehead. "Thanks," I whispered.

Edward gave me a reassuring smile. "Just rest, Bella." Good thing I was already wearing sweats. I don't think I could have gotten up if I had to.

I must have dozed off. When I woke up again, the clock on the DVD player read eleven o'clock. I felt a little better and was actually able to move a bit. I looked around the room, but Milton wasn't there. Emmett, however, was still on the sofa opposite mine, snoring away. I got up to use the bathroom. There was one right down the hall, but I preferred my own in the bedroom so I made the trek. Edward was in there watching TV with Milton next to him.

"Hey, Bella. Do you need something?"

I smiled at Edward and shook my head. "No, just a bathroom break. I'm feeling a little better now," I said as I made my way to my bathroom.

Edward was sitting up waiting for me when I came back out. He pulled me into his lap as I approached him. "I'm glad you're feeling better," he said before he kissed my forehead again letting his lips linger there for a moment longer than necessary. Not that I minded. "No more fever. That's a good thing. You hungry yet?"

I concentrated for second and decided that I was hungry. So we made our way back to the kitchen with Milton following close behind. Emmett was up when we got to there. He must have needed the long nap too because he felt better and was ready to eat soup with us.

We had chicken noodle soup that Hal had cooked up for us. Apparently he "babysat" Emmett and I while Edward took Milton outside for a little while. We were zonked out at the time, Emmett and I, and had no idea Hal was even there.

"You two were dead to the world," Edward pointed out to us.

"I guess we were. I had no idea Hal was even here. He left no trace of himself save for the soup, and I thought you made it, Edward," I said.

"How long was he here?" Emmett asked. He looked like he was thinking hard about something.

"Only fifteen minutes alone with you guys then Milton and I came back up and he continued to make soup. Why do you look puzzled, Emmett?" Edward asked.

"Well, you see how my hoodie is unzipped and my t-shirt is untucked?"

Edward and I looked at each other and shrugged. "So," I said.

"I'm ninety-five percent positive that the shirt was tucked and hoodie was zipped when I arrived here."

"So," I repeated. Emmett raised his eyebrows and put his hands out palms up as if the point were obvious. I actually started to laugh. "So what? You think Hal did it?"

Edward started laughing too. "Yes, Emmett, Hal took advantage of your unconsciousness and had his way with you while you were sleeping."

"With me not ten feet away," I added. "I hate to break this to you, Emmett, but not every straight woman wants you and not every gay man wants you either. Did you ever consider that you unzipped and untucked yourself?"

"Yeah, but I don't think I did. Maybe you did it, Bella," Emmett suggested. "Ow!" Edward threw an oyster cracker at his brother's head and nailed him right in the center of his forehead. Emmett's reflexes and reaction times were still slow. "Dang, Eddie…Ow!" Edward threw another one at him. Milton was helping himself to the crackers as they fell to the floor.

I snorted and shook my head. Emmett was unbelievable. "Emmett, I didn't have the strength to roll over onto my side, and you think I got up and unzipped your hoodie and untucked your shirt to what? Mess with your head?"

"Or grope me. Don't worry, Bella. You don't have to admit it in front of Edward."

I looked at Edward and he rolled his eyes at his brother. I smiled. "Whatever, Emmett. Perhaps it was Hal after all. It's quite a mystery." Emmett merely scowled at me.

I felt so much better after I had some food in me, I went over to give Emmett a hug. "Congratulations, Emmett!" I said with more conviction and emotion this time. "I can't wait to be an auntie."

Emmett chuckled as he hugged me back. "Thanks, Bells. You'll make a great aunt. And Eddie," Emmett laughed as he barely dodged another oyster cracker Edward chucked at his head, "will make a great auntie as well."

I laughed. Emmett was back to normal again.

Emmett stayed the night since it was late. We wanted to make sure he was completely better before sending him home to Rose. He actually stayed another day and a half. It was fun to have Emmett over. It was like a slumber party, but he had his own room at night. Edward's winter break started so he was off for a month. After two days, Emmett and I felt one hundred percent again, and he and Edward were able to help me with a couple top ten lists for the Mars and Venus (and Saturn) column. The day Emmett went home was two days before Renee, Phil and Eli were going to arrive and three days before Alice and Jasper's wedding. We were in for a hectic rest of the month so Edward made sure that the last couple of days we had together were spent in quality time.

We lingered in bed in the morning snuggling and reading the paper. We cooked breakfast, lunch, and dinner together. We took Milton out on walks. We carried him most of the time. Milton was turning out to be quite the spoiled bassett hound, but he was as sweet as could be. We started to crate-train him so he was okay with sleeping in his crate at night and staying in there if we were away during the day. I couldn't get over how non-gassy he was. What a breath of fresh air, literally. And we knew Eli would love Milton.

Speaking of Eli, we stocked up on all the games and movies we knew he'd like. We held off on getting a Christmas tree. We wanted Eli, Renee, and Phil to help us pick it out and decorate it.

Edward got an early Christmas present from Esme and Carlisle in the form of a grand piano. We put it in the piano room. We actually had a room designated as the piano room at the HQ. How posh was that? Edward entertained Milton and me as we sat on the piano bench next to him or on the loveseat watching Edward play. He was amazing, playing classics from memory as well as improvising on the spot.

The afternoon of our last day together before family and friends were to visit, Edward had drawn us a bath, adding rose petals to the water. He lit floral candles and placed them around my bathroom and played an instrumental version of Janet Jackson's _That's the Way Love Goes_ on a loop.

"Ahh, this is so nice," I sighed as I got in the tub and sat in Edward's lap. He wrapped his arms around me as I leaned back against his chest. I moaned softly as I felt his warm mouth against my neck and shoulders.

"You know, Bella," Edward said between kisses. "I never got to fulfill a fantasy of yours. I mean, you were willing to go along with the Princess Leia thing."

I giggled, "Yeah, you really had to force me to go along with that, Edward. I'm pretty sure I was a more than willing participant."

"In any case, love, I owe you."

"Mmm," I moaned. Edward's hands explored every inch of my torso while his lips grazed the back of my neck still. "I'm not keeping score, Edward."

"In any case, love," he repeated. "You must have a fantasy I can help you with, no?"

I moaned again as his hands covered my breasts. I could feel his ambassador coming to attention as I writhed on top. I stood up, turned to face Edward and then straddled him again wrapping my legs around his hips as I sat down. Edward looked so beautiful with the candlelight flickering and dancing against his skin.

His mouth quickly found mine in a soft kiss. "Are you going to tell me?"

I blushed a little but decided to play along. "Alright. I've always been intrigued by the piano scene in _Pretty Woman_ except we'd be kissing of course." I made a face and bit my bottom lip. "But I wouldn't want to desecrate your new piano."

Edward smiled and then kissed me quickly again. I could only assume he was mulling things over. "I think…that…would be…so…fucking…hot," Edward said between kisses.

He stood up, lifting me up with him. I was still wrapped around him. Edward stepped out of the tub and set me down as he grabbed a towel and proceeded to dry me off very slowly and then slipped a black negligee on me. Edward had apparently done some early shopping himself. I would have protested had I not been otherwise distracted. He then slipped my robe on me. I rubbed up against Edward, kissing, and, in effect, drying off the front of him while I towel dried the back of him.

Once Edward was dry, he told me to wait for him in piano room. So I did, taking a few candles with me and setting them around the room. I sat down at the bench and started pressing a few keys. I had no idea what I was doing, but I loved the sounds the piano made, granted, i was only pressing one key at a time. I doubted that it would have sounded as pretty had I played more than one note at a time. I continued to play at playing the piano until I heard Edward clear his throat. I turned around to look at him. I gasped a little as I laid my eyes on Edward. He was wearing a tux minus the jacket and bowtie, donning the vest and tie over a white dress shirt.

I smiled as he approached me. The piano keys clinked as I leaned my behind against them. Edward sat on the bench facing me. He smiled as he untied my robe, exposing the black satin, and began playing a few notes. I could feel his breath through the thin fabric as I held his gorgeous face against the gown. The heat emanating from Edward caused my breath to catch. I closed my eyes as Edward stopped playing and put his hands on my body, stroking me through the silky material.

Edward stood up and lifted me up onto the piano. The keys sounded again as he leaned upon them as he leaned into me, capturing my mouth with his.

His nimble hands found their way under the gown, hiking it up higher and higher. I sat up a little straighter, sounding more piano keys, and kissed whatever skin my lips found as I undressed Edward. Once his shirt was unbuttoned, I left openmouthed kisses on his chest while undoing his trousers. I was pleasantly surprised to find that Edward was commando.

"Nice!" I smirked as I stroked the ambassador.

"Thanks," Edward whispered with a smirk of his own. His hands and mouth were immediately on my exposed skin as he made his way up from my stomach to the valley between my breasts, caressing me with his soft lips, warm tongue, and hot breath. Finally, I laid down on the top of the piano allowing Edward to continue to massage my body.

As much as I was enjoying the role playing and homage to _Pretty Woman_, I couldn't suppress the thought of the piano collapsing if we…kept going in the direction we were headed. Also, the edge of the piano was hurting me a little especially with Edward pressed against me. So, in a move very uncharacteristic of me I cried, "Cut," and closed my eyes in a grimace, bracing myself for Edward's reaction.

He removed his mouth from my chest and lifted his head to look at me. "Excuse me?" He looked very confused. "Did you just yell _cut_?"

I nodded and giggled nervously. "I did. I'm sorry. This is all very beautiful and sexy, and thank you for cooperating, Edward, but can we finish this scene over there?" I gestured toward the loveseat. "Or some other place that's softer and not an expensive gift from your parents?" I bit my bottom lip nervously.

"What about your _Pretty Woman_ fantasy?" Edward asked, clearly amused.

I sighed, "Yeah, well, in theory it's very sexy and hot, but in practice, not so much. I mean look. The piano could collapse, and then what would you tell Esme? Plus, the top of the piano is cold and hard and the edge of it here may have left a permanent mark on my calf, and…" Edward was chuckling. "And I'm sorry, I completely ruined the mood didn't I?" I asked into his chest, which was vibrating in laughter still. I pulled my head back to look at Edward. "Now I know why they cut away from that scene in the movie. They didn't want to show Julia Roberts bitching about how her back hurt or something. What a bunch of crap."

Edward kissed my forehead, my temple, my cheek, and finally his lips lingered on mine as he picked me up bridal style to carry me to the bedroom where we finished the scene the old fashioned way.

**A/N Stupid movie magic, right? Hope you enjoyed this installment. Oh, a link to a picture of Milton is on my profile page. Check it out. He's so cute! So, I'll be attempting to do homework the next day or two, but I welcome the breaks I get when reading reviews. So support the cause won't you? Review!**


	21. A New Sensation

**A/N You know the drill: I'm not Stephenie Meyer and I don't own Twilight.**

**So who, if anyone, unzipped and untucked Emmett? We shall never know…**

**BTW, I'm finished with the 3****rd**** grade PITAs! Hurray! Honestly, most of them were really sweet with only a handful of them being true PITAs. It was just a shame much of my sarcasm was lost on them. Ah well. Perhaps a little rubbed off. I'm so happy I'm done though. I bet you are too.**

**Without further ado, here's 22 (21 on Twilighted). Don't forget to REAR.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 22**

**BPoV**

December was a blur. A fantastic, family and friend filled blur. Renee, Phil, and Eli arrived and stayed a week through and after Alice and Jasper's wedding. Coley and Chad came in for a long weekend and stayed with us part of the time as well. The HQ was definitely the place to be.

Eli had a blast, and we loved every moment we got to spend with him. He had never seen snow before, and though it never stays around for long in Seattle, we did get a bit of the white stuff. There wasn't enough to build a snowman or go sledding, and it melted by the next day, but Eli got to experience snow for the first time. He was hilarious, sticking his tongue out to try and catch the snowflakes. Renee hated snow and cold (it must be a genetic trait passed on to me), but for Eli, MR and I hung out outdoors.

The first day they arrived we took Eli out to pick out a Christmas tree. There will never be anything as sweet and endearing as watching a child experience a real Christmas. Eli had been in foster care for as long as he could remember, and while the families did what they could, the little guy had never been showered with the love and affection he deserved so that made the time that Edward and I got to spend with him all the more special.

We had just finished watching _A Charlie Brown Christmas_, a classic, and keeping in that vein, Eli picked out a sad little tree. He walked right by the big, thick, and extravagant trees. He was drawn to the scrawny one that had been tossed aside in haste. It was as if he had fallen in love with it instantly, just as Charlie Brown did with his own little Christmas tree. Eli smiled at it and said, "It needs us." Well, our hearts all melted, of course, and we obviously had to buy it.

We decorated it with the large classic Christmas light bulbs that always reminded me of Candyland for some reason. Eli's tree only needed one strand of lights, but we bought a lot more to decorate the HQ, our little balcony as well as Milton's crate.

Eli loved Milton, just as we thought he would. Milton was absolutely spoiled. Eli carried him everywhere, and Milton even slept with Eli.

Eli had a really good idea to take pictures of ourselves, including him and Milton together, and place them into ornament frames for the tree. He and I found the little frames when Edward and I took him out to find a present for Renee and Phil. We actually made two sets so they could have one for their tree in Jacksonville.

Frames were the item of the day that day because he asked me to pick out a nice one for MR and DP. I told them that they would probably like a frame that he decorated himself so we ended up going to Glazed Over, one of those make it yourself ceramic places at the mall. We had so much fun there with Eli. We helped him paint a few picture frames, a dog bowl for Milton, and a butter dish for Emmett. Eli thought Emmett could really use a butter dish.

"Look, guys. Big Em can put his butter on this little plate part and then keep it covered!" Eli beamed with delight.

"Absolutely, Eli. I think my brother would really enjoy that butter dish," Edward approved. Eli smiled proudly at his own find.

So Edward and I painted the base color for everything and Eli added his finishing touches, bolts of lightning in miscellaneous colors. We had a really good chat while we were there painting.

"So you guys are gonna get married?" Eli asked us.

Edward and I looked at each other and smiled. "Yes, we are," I answered.

"Like MR and DP are married? And Coley and Chad?"

"Mmmhmm," we nodded. I wondered where he was going with this.

Eli looked pensive. "Why do people get married?"

It was a fairly easy question to answer. I wanted to answer Eli, but I couldn't find the exact words at that moment. I guessed that Edward couldn't either because he and I kept elbowing each other, prodding for an answer for Eli. After a few nudges and a curious look from my little brother, I finally spoke up.

"Well, when two people love each other very much, and they decide that they want to be with each other forever, they get married," I said simply. I gave Edward a quick glance. He nodded his approval of my explanation, adding a wink, making me smile.

Eli still looked pensive. "But some married people don't stay married." Crap! The elbowing started again while Eli looked at us both expectantly.

Being a child of divorce, I fielded this question as well. "Sometimes, even though two people loved each other at one time, they can fall out of love as well. Like Renee and Charlie. And while it's sad, it's sometimes best to not be with each other anymore." I chanced another look at Edward, who gave me another nod of approval.

I blew out the breath I was holding until Eli asked, "Why?"

Finally, Edward spoke up. "It's hard to say why, Eli. People fall out of love for different reasons."

"Will _you_ guys fall out of love? My real daddy left my real mama. They never got married though, and I was little when he left." Eli said it matter-of-factly. He wasn't sad about it like I was. I was sorry to hear about his parents, but it was just a fact about his life. He looked at Edward. "You won't leave Bella will you, Edward?"

Edward gave Eli a small smile. He put down the butter dish and paintbrush to wrap one arm around me and place his other hand on Eli's shoulder, looking him in the eye. "I'm sorry about your parents, Eli," Edward said. "But I love Bella with all my heart and soul and I will never leave her. She's stuck with me forever. Okay?"

Eli studied Edward's face for a moment before he finally nodded, "Okay."

Edward then looked at me, "Okay?"

I was a little shocked. Edward had never openly confessed his love for me to another person before, at least never in front of me. It was quite romantic really. "Aww," I gushed, tilting my head at him.

"It's true," he said simply before leaning in for a chaste kiss.

"Don't do drugs."

We were jolted out of our little moment and looked at Eli, who continued to paint yellow lightning bolts on a black picture frame.

"Huh?" we both asked.

"Don't do drugs," Eli repeated. He stopped painting to look at us. "That's what messed my mama and daddy up. I don't like drugs. They're bad. So don't do drugs." He stared at us until we assured him that we wouldn't do drugs. While I felt bad for Eli, I couldn't help but also feel amused that an eight-year-old kid was telling grown people not to do drugs. I loved it. Edward and I both chuckled quietly when Eli seemed satisfied with our promises and returned to his lightning bolts.

Eli opened up to us about quite a bit that day. He told us what we already knew about his being in foster care most of his life. He had lived with his maternal grandmother, Big Mama, for a little while until it became too dangerous for him to live there. It seemed that drugs were a real problem for Eli's biological family. By some miracle, his biological mother refrained from doing any drugs until after she had him. Eli wasn't born with any drugs in his system, thank goodness. Who knows what he has seen his eight years though.

His favorite place to live before Renee and Phil was the foster family he was with. They were a kind black family, but had several of their own kids and couldn't give him a lot of attention. They were never mean. "They were just _there_," Eli said.

So being busy with all those other kids, they were going to send Eli to an orphanage but then Renee and Phil were approved to adopt and the rest was history.

"I was so excited to be adopted. Usually people don't want to adopt big kids. They only go for little babies 'cause they're cute. I got lucky," he nodded appreciatively.

"No, Eli, I think Renee and Phil are the lucky ones," I smiled at him. He gave me the cutest look of surprise I think I'd ever seen.

It was funny, every time our friends came over and saw the tree for the first time their reactions were all the same.

"Oh," Coley, Rosalie, Alice, and Hal had all commented, with their heads tilted curiously, upon arrival to the HQ and seeing the tree.

"Yes, isn't it great? Eli picked out the tree himself," one of us would clarify enthusiastically.

And then they would smile knowingly and admiringly saying, "It's perfect, Eli. You have wonderful taste in trees." And Eli would smile with pride.

Emmett and Rosalie and Alice and Jasper hung out with us too before the wedding. Alice was so organized and had only hand picked colleagues helping her with her wedding that she was actually able to relax with us while she entrusted them with the details. I was very happy she could relinquish some control, but she was most likely supervising them on the sly. Alice was nothing if not diligent and meticulous, so I was sure she had a checklist of things for her crew to do and complete upon penalty of death via spiked stiletto heel.

Emmett made everyone lattes and hot chocolates and did some baking with me. He had learned his lesson from the uncookies, checking and double-checking to make sure he had all the ingredients. He never challenged me to a throw down again though. While his brownies left something to be desired (the edges were always really hard but the rest of the pan was perfect) he could make a peach cobbler like nobody's business. Evidently, he had been watching Paula Deen very carefully.

Eli even helped Emmett with some baking and hot beverage making. In fact, Eli was Emmett's personal little entourage. It was very cute to see. There was huge, hulking Emmett with little Eli and Milton by his side. Emmett loved every second of it. He said he felt like a rock star with Eli following him around, and it was as if he was practicing his fathering skills. He and Eli even got matching tracksuits and sneakers. From what we witnessed, Emmett's future as a great dad looked very promising.

The fact that Emmett had always been young at heart only helped to foster his and Eli's relationship. How many times had I heard from his siblings, parents, and wife that he was a big kid? But he could also be a wonderful grown up. Emmett definitely had his moments. He took such good care of Rosalie that it was mind blowing to think that the same guy who wanted to be known as _Uranus_ and will forever be known as _PITA Boy_, could also be so attentive to his pregnant wife. Must have been a genetic trait of the Cullens.

Of course, Emmett was always good for a laugh. He hadn't forgotten how violated he felt when he stayed with us during our bout of the flu. While Emmett was still friendly to him, he never wanted to hang out with Hal for too long unless there were others around as well. _Witnesses_ were what he called us. Ridiculous. So, in turn, Edward and I would go out of our way to juxtapose Hal and Emmett together. We had never mentioned the alleged untuck/unzip episode to anyone, and I was never sure if Emmett mentioned it to Rosalie, so it was like an inside joke to us. Well, it amused Edward and me anyway. It had left a bad taste in Emmett's mouth though.

Whether Hal did it or not (and I was convinced it was all in Emmett's head), I had to believe it was karma biting Emmett in the butt (or in this case untucking and unzipping him) for calling Hal _Big Gay Hal_ all those times.

Once when we were baking, I had run out of eggs. I suggested Emmett run upstairs to borrow one from Hal and Shane since he was the one that needed it. He stared at me for a long moment through narrowed eyes.

"What?" I shrugged.

"The devil doesn't wear Prada. The devil wears blue Chuck Taylors and is a big time klutz."

I just gazed back at Emmett as if he were nuts.

"Et tu, Bella?" Emmett asked.

I merely rolled my eyes, "No one's stabbing you in the back, Emmett. Stop being such a big, paranoid baby, go upstairs and borrow a big gay egg." That _gay _part slipped out. Luckily, Edward and Eli were outside with Milton at the time so Eli didn't hear my flub.

Emmett laughed at my mistake, and ended up going to the grocery store under the pretense of getting something that Rosalie was craving. What a coward!

Alice's wedding was a sight to behold. Elegant to the Nth degree, of course. It was held at Unitarian Church and the reception was in the huge Paris Ballroom at the Hotel Monaco.

Alice and Jasper's reception was very similar to that of Coley and Chad's except instead of mostly professional athletes attending, there were physicians. The place was literally crawling with doctors. If there was ever a good time and place to have a heart attack, god forbid, it was at Alice and Jasper's reception.

Alice looked beyond lovely in her Vera Wang dress. The calalilly shape and mermaid design looked perfect on my soon-to-be sister-in-law. Her bouquet of white and blush colored roses, which I somehow caught, was a perfect contrast to my light blue Grecian goddess-inspired bridesmaid gown. And since my captain had been fully healed for some time now, there was no excuse I could give to get out of wearing blasted heels that pinched my pinky toes. I didn't complain once to Alice though. Fortunately, she couldn't tell my genuine smiles from the grimaces of pain I was enduring.

Edward, on the other hand, knew I was suffering and promised to rub my feet (among other things) later. There was something to be said about the romance and magic of a wedding that got Edward especially eager for _more_. I couldn't help but smile as I thought back on Coley's reception a couple months prior when we had the cow buying issue and misunderstanding along with some hot _more._

"What's that smile about?" Edward asked as we were dancing to what seemed like a repeat of the songs Coley had at her wedding. I recalled how we, Coley, Alice and I, had similar opinions on potential wedding songs, which reminded me, Edward and I still didn't have a song picked out yet. "Bella?"

My attention snapped back to the man that was holding me. "Oh, sorry. Just thinking."

"About?" he prodded.

"About good times in Phoenix," I said.

"Ah, yes. Good times," Edward concurred. "Which memories specifically?"

A blush immediately flooded my face. "Ah, yes," he repeated with a smirk knowing he had read my mind. "Different but good times indeed."

I pursed my lips and narrowed my eyes trying to play off my stupid blush. "I was thinking about the good time we had with family and friends," I lied indignantly raising my chin up just a smidge.

Edward laughed at my expression and leaned in to whisper in my ear, "You mean you weren't _at all_ thinking about making love on the night of the rehearsal dinner?"

"Nope," I lied again.

Edward's lips remained practically on my ear, his breath tickled and caused me to squirm just a bit. He continued as if I hadn't said anything to negate him. "And you weren't giving a second thought to when I buried myself inside you in the bathroom of the hotel after you teased me by taking off your underwear in the elevator?"

I closed my eyes giving in to the memory, and the way Edward said _buried myself inside you_ sent heat searing through me, I contracted my kegel muscles in response. "Huh-uh," I lied again. My voice broke. I knew Edward knew I was lying. He also knew exactly what he was doing to me. I was denying thinking of those memories just to keep him talking, which he did.

Edward gripped me a little tighter to him, and I could feel his arousal. "And you're telling me you weren't blushing crimson from thinking about when we were in that really hot position and we…"

That did it. I grabbed Edward's face and planted a kiss in his perfect mouth. It started to escalate in intensity until we both remembered where we were. While there weren't a lot of people left at the reception, we were still in public after all. Edward broke the kiss and pressed his forehead to mine smiling and talking. To the outside observer it looked as if he was just talking innocently, but to me he said, "I want you so bad right now, Bella, let's get out of here before I lose all control and take you here on the dance floor."

I laughed as I kissed him quickly. "Yes, we'd better get out of here because that's just not socially acceptable, Edward."

We said our goodbyes quickly knowing we'd see Alice and Jasper, and everyone else for that matter, the next day.

Edward all but carried me to his car, we got there so fast. Renee and Phil had left with Eli an hour and half prior to our exit. They used my car and my house key so they could get Eli to bed. Coley and Chad were staying at the hotel for the night.

It was a quick and quiet ride home. I was anticipating what was to transpire, and when we were alone in the elevator we began ravaging each other as soon as the doors closed. We were still at it as the elevator door opened to the fifth floor. We knew we were the only tenants there so our inhibitions hadn't kicked in yet. Edward had me backed up against the wall next to our door trailing kisses up and down my neck, collarbones, and shoulders while squeezing and kneading me through the dress. I was enjoying it immensely but remembered my family was inside, most likely asleep, but inside nonetheless.

"Edward?" I breathed.

"Hmm?" he moaned into the hollow of my throat.

I untangled my fingers from his hair so I could talk to him properly. "I don't want to scream," I whispered.

Edward pulled his head back, "I don't follow, love."

"I mean, don't make me scream out of…you know…pleasure. My family's here. Take it easy." I gave him an imploring look. He was aware of how vocal I could get in the throes of passion.

Edward smiled his wicked crooked grin. "I don't make you scream like that on purpose." That was a lie. I pursed my lips and he laughed. "All right. Let's get inside." He gave my tush one last squeeze before unlocking the door. It was quiet inside. Everyone was asleep.

We scurried quietly to our room. Edward locked the door once we were safely inside. He immediately grabbed me, pressing his body to mine. "Now where were we?"

"We were concentrating on not waking up the entire building," I answered.

"They're on the other side of the HQ, Bella," Edward smiled.

I shook my head. "I don't care. I don't want to scream while they're here. So work with me here, Edward."

He laughed. "Okay. Challenge. Let's do it as quietly as possible. The quietest person wins. Are you game?" I smiled and nodded my consent to the challenge.

A thought sprang to mind though. I wasn't sure Edward was actually trying to work with me. He was probably going to try to do everything in his power to get me to be loud. _Not going to happen_, I thought.

I took one last appreciative look at Edward in his tux before I undressed him, and Edward had my dress off in an instant as well, wasting no time with my matching bra and panty (not a thong, thank you very much) set.

Edward scooped me up and gently placed me on the bed, but he didn't join me right away. He just stood above me, watching me, taking in my form, I guessed. I grew tired of waiting so I got up threw my arms around his neck, wrapped my legs around his waist, and kissed him. Edward kissed me back fervently, sliding his tongue into my mouth to wrestle with mine. I initiated the friction but Edward continued it. I could feel the ambassador rubbing against my entrance. I wanted to moan right then but I took in a deep breath and blew it out slowly. It worked, and thus, my strategy was born.

Unfortunately, my strategy also heightened the sensations I was feeling which were causing me to want to moan more. It wasn't fair! I had to strike back somehow. I had to cause Edward to experience new sensations in order to get him to moan. If I could get Edward to cave first, I knew I'd be able to remain quiet just out of sheer satisfaction of making him lose at his own game.

I unlatched myself from Edward's front side and turned him around. I was kneeling on the bed as I grabbed the boys, massaging them from behind while simultaneously rubbing my breasts against his back and kissing and licking up and down his spine. A small, "Ugh," escaped Edward's mouth causing me to smile against the small of his back. I was home free. Well, not really. I still had to try to stay pretty quiet, but I did get Edward to vocalize his pleasure first.

The problem was, he knew he slipped up so now the game was really on. Edward just had to get me to be a little louder than him, and that was entirely possible.

I had to remind myself to keep deep breathing as Edward turned himself back around to face me. He kissed me so passionately my knees buckled. Good thing the bed was right there. I was lying on the bed with my knees hanging off of the edge. Edward kneeled down on the floor and kissed and licked at my wet folds while caressing my inner thighs. I nearly went to pieces but continued to breathe out slowly. His skillful tongue moved in and out, swirled and massaged. I arched my back and bucked my hips up involuntarily but remained quiet. Typically, I would have cried out Edward's name several times by now.

Sensing his imminent loss in the game, or perhaps motivated by it, Edward unleashed the ambassador. He kissed his way from between my legs, up my stomach and torso, and settled on the hardened peaks of my breasts, nipping and sucking. His ambassador was positioned to penetrate, and penetrated he did. Edward represented very well, slamming and sliding in and out of me. My breathing quickened. It was harder to try to breath deeply and blow the air out slowly. I had to breathe to his pace. It was probably similar to Lamaze. I felt myself grow closer to my climax with each stroke, in which I squeezed him upon each rentry.

Edward thrust into me one last time and hit me just the right way. My fingernails dug into his pillow, which I had somehow gotten a hold of, arms above my head on the bed. I let a breath out ever so slowly as I came the quietest I had ever come, eyes closed, mouth forming an O-shape. My walls had clamped around the ambassador, milking it as Edward's release followed mine. He was also quiet, but the damage had already been done. I had won due to the slightest of grunts.

I threw my arms up in victory. "Yes!" I grinned.

"Is that _yes_ for the pleasure I brought you or your win?" he asked with slight yet playful resentment.

"Both," I smirked as I squeezed him once more since he was still inside of me. "Thanks."

Edward kissed me. "No, thank you." He shook his head at me. "You're a robot, love."

I laughed. "I'm not a robot. It was merely mind over matter. Plus, I'm just good."

Edward chuckled and kissed me again. "That you are, Bella. That you are. And you know I love you right?"

I smiled into the crook of his neck kissing the skin there. "You know I love you too right?"

**A/N Look what happens when I'm all done with student teaching! You're welcome. Oh, Alice's dress as well as her bouquet and Bella's dress are on my profile page. Let me know if the links don't work.**

**Now review please! Thanks to all those who have reviewed in the past and continue to do so. I really, really appreciate it. MissRe and Gemini169 have been with me from Saving Me--thanks. Phantom was my very first reviewer back in the day. And here's a shout out to a new reader who's reviews I printed out to look at when I get writer's block: Starhealr. Thanks. So, those who haven't reviewed yet, whatcha waiting for? A written invitation? Well here it is: You are cordially invited to review this silly, fluffy, story. Be nice. Click on the button below…**


	22. Eyes on the Prize

**A/N I do not own what clearly belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Wow! I have over 500 reviews on FF! Thanks guys, you're the best! **

**I wanted to get another chapter out to unwind before I take my teaching certification exams on Saturday. Picture it: me, 7:15 am, Two exams, five hours each, multiple choice and essays. Blah! Well, I don't mind the essays. I can bs for days you know. Hopefully I won't need the five hours allotted for each exam though. Wish me luck! In the mean time, enjoy the next chapter and don't forget to review.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 22**

**BPoV**

The rain pelted the windshield of Edward's car as we drove away from the airport after having dropped off Renee, Phil, and Eli. I missed them already, and with each drop that landed on the car and resounded in my ear, I grew a little sadder.

Edward's hand rested on mine atop the center console. He gave my hand a squeeze and then interlaced our fingers. I looked at our hands and then looked up at him. My mouth conceded and formed a very slight smile, trying my hardest to cheer up. Edward responded by bringing my hand up to his face and touching the back of it with his lips.

"Thanks," I said.

"We'll see them again very soon, love," Edward reassured me.

"I know," I said quietly and then formed a genuine smile a moment later as the thought hit me. "At our wedding."

A smile formed on Edward's lips as well, and he gave the back of my hand another kiss, allowing his lips to linger there. I guessed he liked the sound those words made, _our wedding_.

After the excitement of Alice and Jasper's nuptials and spending so much time with family and friends, Edward and I decided to set a date. Also, Alice had been sweating us to do so before she and Jasper left for their honeymoon and throughout the rest of the holiday season. They were gone for ten days before returning home, rejuvenated, blissful, and tan from Puerto Rico, to celebrate Christmas with the family.

Alice decided that since her wedding was done as well as bridezilla's, that is the governor's daughter, she fully intended to concentrate on mine. So, Edward and I needed to set a date in order for Alice to get to work. The most practical thing to do was to wait for the summer when Edward wasn't busy with med school. It would also give Alice a lot of time to plan a huge, over-the-top ceremony and reception, unleashing the no holds barred Cullen The Sky's the Limit Wedding Extravaganza.

So, obviously, being the modest and simple girl that I was, I convinced Edward to agree to an earlier date. Why be practical? It actually didn't take much to convince Edward. He knew a huge production wasn't my style. Plus, the thought of being married really appealed to him. The sooner the better was Edward's opinion on the matter. He seemed to have convinced himself that he had wasted so much time without me, and he refused to waste any more.

That was silly. I mean, we had both all but pledged ourselves to each other as we were engaged, but the idea of officially being married put a distinctive gleam in Edward's eyes, it excited him so much. The funny thing was, we had watched and reviewed the movie, _He's Just Not That Into You, _where Bradley Cooper's character told Ben Affleck's character that men didn't really want to get married. Ever. And then here was Edward Cullen, the antithesis of every other average man, in my opinion.

Where Bradley Cooper's character stated that engaged men will only think about the women they hadn't had yet, Edward was pleased, more than pleased really, to know that we'd be sharing a lifetime of _more_ together.

Anyway, the date we decided on was the first day of spring, which fell on a Friday, not the typical day for a wedding for sure, but that was what we wanted.

Alice was a bit annoyed with such a quick wedding date but realized I meant business when I told her I didn't want anything crazy. My motto is _KISS—Keep It Simple, Stupid_. Well, naturally, I didn't call her stupid. And I had to convince Emmett that it wasn't a shotgun wedding. Milton would be his one and only nephew for a while, at least on Edward's and my part.

I didn't need anything fancy. Read: no Vera Wang needed. That was fine and dandy for Rosalie, Alice and Coley, but definitely not for me. And the only people that I required to be there were our families, Hal and Shane and Coley and Chad, though I thought after setting the date that it may be difficult for Chad to get away since baseball season would have started by then.

Edward was supportive in my stipulations and specifications. Hell, he would have been happy to head down to the courthouse and have a judge marry us and then send announcments to everyone later. While I am a modest and simple girl, I valued my life, especially since I had the potential of spending the rest of it with Edward. However, had we gone to the courthouse, we'd have a mob of angry friends and family waiting to murder us, thus, no happily ever after. No, we had to have a small ceremony with a little bit of a production if only to qualm Alice's wedding OCD tendencies.

"Bella?" Edward asked as we approached the apartment. "We still have the matter of our wedding song to discuss."

I smiled even bigger. "Yes, I know. Do you have your list?"

"Of course," Edward answered. "Do you have yours?"

"Of course," I mimicked.

We had decided to listen to each of our top picks for a wedding song and then come to an agreement hopefully.

"And then you'll make good on my prize for winning the quiet bet?" I asked devilishly.

Edward's eyes narrowed as he glanced sideways at me. He didn't know what I had in store for him and was quite wary. "Yes, I suppose."

I made a face. "It actually was a rhetorical question, Edward. You have to make good on the bet. Period."

"Hmmph," he grunted, feigning annoyance.

That night of quiet sex after Alice's wedding was the first, but definitely not the last. Well, we had no choice while my family was staying with us. If we wanted _more_, we had to keep it down or risk scarring Eli and other loved ones for life. We didn't make another bet after the night I won, but we had fun keeping it quiet.

I had a hard time coming up with a good prize for winning, but ultimately a very brilliant idea came to me.

"Should I be frightened, Bella?" Edward asked once we got to the HQ.

"Don't be silly, Edward. I wouldn't make you do anything you wouldn't have made me do had you won your little game," I said cryptically.

Edward thought a moment and said, "I _should_ be frightened then."

My mouth opened. I was about to ask him to expand on that, but then I decided I didn't want to know just then what he had planned for me had he won our bet. "Just get your play list, Edward."

We spent the rest of the afternoon sitting on the bed listening to music and vetoing each other's choices for one reason or another after having stated a case for why certain songs belonged on _The List or not_.

Edward vetoed the Sade song, _By Your Side_, as well as Surface's _Shower Me with Your Love, _since each had been used in our friends' weddings already. He wanted a song of our own. I couldn't blame him. The songs were beautiful but were already claimed. Not that the song we'd eventually come up with wouldn't be claimed by some couple somewhere, but we'd feel better if we didn't know that couple.

Edward insisted on not having any Celine Dion song of any kind. I wasn't partial to Celine in any way, but I questioned his stance against her.

"Why no Celine?" I asked.

"Because she's Celine," he stated simply but with a disgusted look on his face, as if that were reason enough. "Don't tell me you like her, Bella," he sounded slightly horrified.

I shrugged. "She's not terrible, but I have no allegiance towards her or anything." Edward blew out a sigh of relief.

"No Barbara Streisand either please," he requested.

I just gave Edward a strange look. "What am I fifty years old? I didn't even consider her, Edward."

Again, another sigh of relief. Apparently Esme listened to a lot of Babs when Edward was growing up, and he'd never been a fan.

Edward really was partial to Blue October's _Sound of Pulling Heaven Down_, because, once again, it restated how he'd wasted so much time. I vetoed it, not because I didn't like it, but because ultimately I wanted the song to reflect how both of us felt. Also, it was a little too rock-n-roll towards the end, and I have a hard enough time dancing to slow songs even with Edward leading. He conceded. He probably was thinking about his poor feet.

Blue October's _18__th__ Floor Balcony_ made the short list though. Edward didn't have to argue its business being on The List. The lyrics were beautiful and sung with so much emotion.

By four o'clock we had a short list consisting of _18__th__ Floor Balcony, _Chaka Khan's_ Through the Fire, Lovesong_ by the Cure, _Crush_ by Dave Matthews Band, _I'm Kissing You_ by Des'ree, and _Collide_ by Howie Day.

"This is quite a varied list, love," Edward commented.

"We don't have to make a decision right this second, but it's good to have a working list don't you think?" I asked.

"_Working list_? This isn't the final list then?" Edward quirked an eyebrow up at me.

"Of course not. If we find another song that might be fitting, we can add it to The List."

"You sound like you have one to add already, Bella. Care to share?"

I thought a moment. I did have one in mind. "I want to mull it over a little longer before I share. I really like it though. It has _it_ potential."

"Now I'm very intrigued. Why can't I hear it now?" Edward asked, pouting just a bit.

I smiled. "Because it's time for my prize." Edward pouted a little bit more in response.

"Oh alright. Bring it on. What do I have to do?" he sounded like a whiny child.

"Well, you'll be my servant boy for the rest of the evening," I grinned.

"Oookay. That doesn't sound so bad. What do you want me to do for you?"

"Well, I'd like a foot rub please. I'll be requiring a snack after that and then a nice hot bath to relax in." Edward nodded after I ticked off each item on my list.

"See, I'm not that demanding am I?"

Edward grinned his sexy crooked grin, "No, you're not. Your wish is my command or what's the line from _The Princess Bride_? _As you wish," _Edward said as he bowed his head.

"Oh, I forgot to mention," I lightly hit my forehead with the heel of my hand as if it slipped my mind. "You'll only be wearing a loin cloth as my servant boy."

The look on Edward's face was priceless. His mouth fell open and his chin, too, fell ever so slightly from its already bowed position. Edward was about to say something, but I beat him to the punch.

"Yes, you heard me correctly," I smiled as I got up from the bed and grabbed a bag from the back of the closet. I opened it up and presented Edward with his _costume_. He merely stared silently at it. It was actually pretty conservative for a loincloth. It was white silky material that wasn't clingy at all. It actually looked like a very short skirt and even came with a garland of olive leaves for Edward to wear on his head. He was my personal Greek god after all.

I handed it to Edward. "Hop to it, Hercules."

Edward pursed his lips and took it grudgingly. "I suppose I had this coming after the Princess Leia thing, huh?"

"Yeah, that's right," I said quickly and flippantly, shooing Edward off to change.

"Come on, Bella!" I heard Edward whine from the bathroom. His voice was slightly muffled since the door was closed.

I had to smile. "Let's see it, big boy," I hollered back giggling a little.

The doorknob turned and the door swung open. Edward sauntered out, lips decidedly in pout formation, arms folded over his chest but looking as glorious as I imagined he would. The fabric hung so very low off of his hips, showing off his perfect torso, accentuating his Apollo's belt, the inviting shape his hip bones and toned muscles formed that drew my eyes downward towards the ambassador. Mmmmm. I shamelessly ogled Edward.

"Very nice," I nodded in satisfaction of the sight before me. "Very nice," I repeated quietly.

Edward stood over me. "Seriously?" he asked dubiously.

"Uh, yeah," I said as if it weren't obvious. That seemed to convince Edward of his hotness in the loincloth. He sat down on the bed by my feet and began to massage them as I leaned back on the pillow and headboard, watching him watch me. I moaned as he pressed in all the right places.

"Ah," he said. "I missed that."

"What?" I asked.

"The little moans that you let escape. I missed hearing them during our, uh, quiet time," Edward smirked. "I hope to hear more of them tonight. They're really quite sexy."

Edward had finished my right foot and began massaging the left one. I used my free foot to explore the area underneath the cloth.

"Mmm," Edward moaned as my foot caressed the ambassador. I smiled. I missed his moans too. We had both gotten very good at quiet time.

"Thank you," I said when Edward put my left foot down upon finishing the foot rub.

"No. Thank _you_," he said referring to my fancy footwork. Edward then started crawling up the bed towards me. My fingertips ghosted over Edward's muscular form as his face neared mine. And just as lightly, his lips brushed against mine a couple times before he pressed them to my own in soft yet sensual kiss. I felt Edward's tongue slide across my bottom lip and my mouth opened automatically for it to come inside. We both melted into this kiss as another small moan escaped me. I felt the rumble from Edward's chest as he moaned in response.

Edward broke the kiss to whisper, "I very much like what you're wearing, but under the circumstances, you are way overdressed, love." He was tugging up the tank top that I changed into when he was in the bathroom earlier. I sat up so Edward could pull it off of me. He freed me of my bra soon after. "See, that's better," he murmured as captured one of my hardened peaks in his warm mouth. The feel of Edward's tongue on me was unbelievable. I couldn't hold in my pleasure. The more sounds I made, the more vigorous Edward's mouth would work. The more he worked, the more I moaned and arched my body towards him.

Edward's hands found their way to my hipsters as he rolled over, pulling me on top. He shimmied them as low as his hands could push them allowing his feet to finish the job. When he used his feet though, the loincloth flipped up revealing the ambassador at full attention to me. It was my turn to crawl up towards Edward's face. I slowly kissed him and was about to lower my entrance onto him when Edward stopped me.

"Wait," he said in a thick voice. "Let me kiss you here first," he lightly touched my slick folds. Before I could get off of Edward, he grabbed my behind and guided me up to his mouth until my core was hovering above him. I grabbed onto the top of the headboard and moaned Edward's name loudly when I felt his mouth on me. His tongue slipped in to massage me from the inside while his hands continued to massage me from the backside.

In and out his tongue darted, and right before I was about to come, Edward stopped, pulled his tongue out and then allowed me to do the reverse crawl down his body, dragging my breasts down and over his face as I finally lowered myself onto the ambassador. His hands were still on my butt as he moved me to set the rhythm. Edward's hands then moved up my torso and settled on my breasts as I continued to ride him at the pace he liked.

Edward murmured my name as many times as I said his. I could feel my walls closing in around him, squeezing him one last time as I shook and writhed with my climax. Edward's release followed right after. I threw my head back from the pleasure of him pulsing inside me upon his own climax.

I collapsed on Edward's chest. "Mmm. Thanks again," I mumbled.

"No. Thank _you_," he repeated his sentiment from earlier. We laid there quietly a moment, enjoying the closeness, at least I was. "Bella?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I hear the song please?" Edward asked.

"Huh?"

"The song that you were still mulling over? I'd like to hear it."

It took me a second to process the request. "Oh. Okay. Just a sec." I reluctantly removed myself from Edward's chest and grabbed my iPod. I quickly found the song he was referring to and placed the iPod on the dock. I snuggled into the crook of Edward's neck as we both listened carefully to the song and its lyrics. I hoped he would be able to apply them to himself just as I was able to do to mine. Once the song ended, I looked at him expectantly, biting my bottom lip awaiting his reaction to it.

I breathed a sigh of relief as smile crept across Edward's face when his eyes met mine. "That's it, Bella. It's perfect for us."

**A/N Okay, there you go. Hoped you enjoyed loinclothed Edward -trills R's- Yummo! A picture of the loincloth is, of course, on my profile page. Unfortunately, it's not Rob Pat wearing it, but you can use your imaginations right? Oh, I know I didn't get to the snack or bath, but I'm very tired now. Maybe next time, eh? Thanks for reading. Now review please!**


	23. The Ambassador is Revealed

**A/N I do not own Twilight. Stephenie Meyer does. **

**So nobody liked Edward in a loincloth. The truth is, everyone LOVED Edward in a loincloth! I can't blame you guys. I wish I could have photoshopped Rob Pat's head on loincloth boy from my profile. It's the thought that counts right?**

**Okay, here's an update. It's a shorty. Consider it a bonus. I couldn't help myself after taking the exams and having a couple glasses of wine. Plus, some of you were sweating me for the song. Yep, it's in this one. And despite the suggestive title of this chapter, there's no lemon. I hope you'll read it anyway. You know the drill: REAR please.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 24**

**BPoV**

"Ugh! What's wrong with people!" I muttered to myself as I turned off the stupid television and threw the remote down on the bed, frightening Milton in the process since he was lying next to me. Milton barked once, probably from my uncharacteristic outburst, but I'd like to believe he was just as disgusted as I was. I apologized to Milton, "Sorry, boy."

Edward had walked out from the bathroom just as I muttered "Idiots" under my breath.

"Are you talking to yourself, Bella? Who are you calling idiots?"

"The people who made the commercial that I just saw for _Slumdog Millionaire_," I answered with disdain evident in my tone.

"I thought you liked that movie," Edward said as he sat facing me on the bed. Edward and I had reviewed it a few weeks ago.

"I do." It was true. I actually enjoyed it immensely. "It's just that the way they're promoting it makes it look like a musical and it's not, obviously." Edward gave me a strange look. "Yeah, you know the random dance sequence at the end? They're showing that on the commercial for the movie and it wasn't even part of the movie. Now people are going to see it thinking it's some upbeat song and dance show."

Edward winced at the thought and shook his head. "Ooh, they'll be in for a rude awakening then," he commented.

"Yeah they will," I agreed. I sighed. "It's really bugging me, Edward. Quick. Distract me please."

Edward looked at me for a second and then leaned in to kiss me. I inhaled his scent as his lips moved against mine. Mmm. Edward always smelled so wonderfully, like fresh air and sunshine.

"Is that better?" he asked as he broke the kiss so I could breathe.

I stared at him. My mind was blank. "Is what better?" I asked.

Edward chuckled softly. "Good." He checked his watch. "Alice will be here soon. Are you prepared?"

I rolled my eyes. "There's nothing to prepare. All she wants is a recent picture of us and our list of songs, including _THE song_. I'm giving her the picture Eli gave us for Christmas."

I leaned over Milton and grabbed the black picture frame decorated with yellow lightening bolts from the nightstand. Coley had given the picture to Eli to give to us for Christmas. It was the one of Edward and me from Coley's reception that the photographer took right when Edward and I shared a moment. I loved that picture. We were both looking at each other with such affection. It was right when Edward dazzled me with his crooked smile and powerful gaze, essentially wiping my mind clear of the question I was going to ask him at the time regarding what he said about finding our own song.

I glanced at Edward. He was staring down at the picture with a slight smile, probably remembering that exact moment as well.

"See how happy we looked?" I asked. "I remember I felt so…complete."

"And now?" Edward asked. "You don't feel complete now?" he pretended to feel hurt.

I playfully shoved his shoulder. "No, not complete," I said. Edward raised his eyebrows in surprise. I leaned towards him and kissed the tip of his nose. "No, now I feel…_completer_." I nodded, satisfied with my new word.

Edward chuckled. "_Completer._ I like it." He laughed again. "We speak a language all our own, Bella. A little dialect called _crazy_, right? "

I nodded again. "I know like _percentage check, more, ambassador, completer…_"

"What was that?" Edward tilted his head looking at me curiously. _Oops, I let that slip. _"What did you just say, Bella?"

"Um, _completer_?"

"No, before that."

"_More?"_

"No, after that."

I pretended to have to think about it. I puffed out my cheeks, shrugged and shook my head as if I couldn't remember.

"Ambassador?" Edward asked. He furrowed his brow, thinking hard. "I sort of recall you saying that word before, like you called me ambassador once maybe?"

"I don't know, Edward. Maybe I said it in my sleep or something. You know I do that." Edward regarded me skeptically. I probably would have gotten away with that explanation if my stupid blush hadn't betrayed me. I silently cursed my inconvenient, involuntary bodily reaction.

"_Bella?" _Edward prodded. "Am I the ambassador?" he asked confused.

"Yes. No. Sort of. Nevermind," I stuttered. I waved him off, "Don't worry about it, Edward."

Edward continued to stare at me. "I wouldn't worry about, love, but you're all kinds of crimson so I am extremely intrigued. This has got to be pretty good."

Just then, the doorbell rang. It was Alice. "I should get that," I said as I hopped up from the bed. Edward got up with me and followed me down the hall.

"Oh, no, Bella. Alice can wait a moment. I want to know why I'm the ambassador," Edward was smiling as he grabbed my hand to slow me down. I wondered if he'd look as amused when I told him.

I sighed heavily. "Fine. But don't be…" I searched my mind for the right word as I wondered what he'd be. "…mad?" I shrugged unsure if that was the correct word or not. He probably wouldn't be mad about it. The doorbell rang again and Edward squeezed my hand to keep me from answering it. He looked at me expectantly.

"Okay," I spoke quickly in one huge run-on sentence. "Before we had _more_, I was nervous about it and Coley said not to worry because the pressure was on you to represent for men and that you were my ambassador to the land of sex which you did, represent I mean, and then I just transferred it to refer to your boy part as _the ambassador happy?"_

Edward furrowed his brow again, mouth slightly agape, most likely reviewing what I just spat out. I felt his grip on my hand slacken so I removed it from his and rushed to get the door before he had a chance to respond to the nickname or my embarrassing discourse.

"Hey, Alice," I said brightly as I swung the door open. It was Alice, but she brought Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie with her. "Oh, hey, everyone. Come in." I was thankful for the distraction. I'm sure I was still red.

As everyone came in, I noticed Edward was still in the same spot where I left him.

"What took so long to answer the door?" Alice demanded. "And why does Edward look like he was just molested?"

Emmett was standing in front of Edward waving his hand in front of Edward's still glazed over expression. Getting no reaction from Edward right away, Emmett shrugged and went into the kitchen to make lattes, I assumed, while Jasper went to play with Milton, throwing his stuffed squeaky frog down the hall for him to fetch. Milton didn't fetch though, so Jasper had gone to retrieve it himself. Edward finally composed himself, blowing out a long breath.

Rosalie and Alice looked at me for an explanation. "I just told him what _ambassador_ means," I told them in a hushed voice as another blush colored my face. They both threw their heads back in understanding and then nodded. "He's a bit…weirded out?" I continued. That had to be it. I looked at Edward and he nodded as if to confirm that he was, indeed, weirded out.

"Eh, don't worry about it, Edward," Rosalie said nonchalantly. "Emmett's is the _joystick_."

"_Really?" _Edward and I both asked in horror_. _I slapped the heels of my hands over my eyes shaking my head. I could have lived the rest of my life quite happily not knowing this information.

"Yeah, and Jasper's is the megapixel," Alice informed us.

"Wow. I so did not need to know any of this," I said still shaking my head.

"Me neither," Edward agreed just as Emmett emerged from the kitchen and stood behind Rosalie, holding a drink for her.

"Hey, bro, good to see you out of that little dazed state. What'd Bella do, give you a wedgie?" He reached around her and handed the drink to Rose. "Ready to go, babe?" She nodded.

"You're going already?" I asked.

"Yeah, we only stopped by because Rosie was craving a hot chocolate and only loves the way I make it for her using Bessie," he said smiling smugly. "We're off to get her some strawberry rhubarb pie now. You guys in?" he asked us.

"Uh, no thanks," I said. "Strawberry rhubarb pie?" I asked. "Another craving?" I looked at Rosalie.

She smiled and nodded, "Another craving. It's weird. It's like when I crave something, I have to have it right away or else nobody's happy."

Emmett made a face, "No lie," He mouthed at Edward and me. We both smiled slightly and Rosalie immediately whipped her head around to give Emmett a death glare. He quickly changed his expression back to the happy husband look and said, "What my Rosie wants, my Rosie gets," and pecked her on her cheek eliciting a big smile out of Rosalie. Edward and I smiled even bigger at him.

"Well, have fun guys," I said. Rosalie and Emmett said their goodbyes and left.

"Do you have what I need, Bella?" Alice asked.

"Yep," I handed her the picture frame. "You only need the picture for a little while right?" I asked her.

"Yeah, I'm just going to scan it for the slideshow for your rehearsal dinner. And that's all I'm telling you about it. Except for you two and everyone else will love the slideshow. Oh, and I need the play list too. Can't have a slideshow without music."

I handed Alice the CD I burned. She glanced at the names of the songs on the back of the CD.

"Very nice, but I haven't heard THE song before." I had placed asterisks next to the song name indicating that it was the one. "I can't wait to play it." Alice checked the time. "Shoot! Jasper, we have to go." He was still down the hall trying to get Milton to fetch. Yeah, that wasn't going to happen anytime soon.

"Sorry we can't stay long either. I have a potential bridezilla to meet. It's Jasper's coworker's fiancé. We're having dinner with them," Alice told us before I could even ask her who the potential new client was. "Oh, and Edward?" Alice whispered so Jasper wouldn't hear. "You were just privy to some top secret information. Neither Jazz nor Emmett know about their nicknames so keep your pie hole shut, okay?"

"Believe me," Edward told his sister, "I'm trying my hardest to erase these past ten to fifteen minutes with you guys from my memory."

"Good," Alice smiled as Jasper joined us.

"Milton sucks at fetching," Jasper said as if he were telling us something we didn't already know.

"Yeah," Edward and I said simultaneously. We both sounded bland about it.

"But when you're that cute, you don't need to fetch anything," I said.

Jasper nodded. "I'll grant Milton that."

Soon, Alice and Jasper left and Edward and I were alone once again.

"That was random," I said as I closed the door behind Alice and Jasper and turned to look at Edward. He was smirking at me. "What?" I asked, though I knew it was about the ambassador moniker. "Aren't you glad yours isn't _the joystick _or _megapixel_," I shuddered.

"Extremely," Edward answered as he wrapped his arms around me. "Compared to Emmett's and Jasper's, mine sounds like a superhero." I felt his chest rumbling with laughter.

I laughed too as I thought about the superhero bit. Was it ever. "So I'm glad you're not as weirded out by it anymore," I said into Edward's chest.

"Oh, I'm still slightly weirded out, but it's funny. So, I reperesented well, huh?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, of course. God, that was embarrassing to admit…Edward?" I asked pulling my head back to look at him. "Why is it I can't keep from humiliating myself in front of you? I'm a freak show aren't I?"

Edward kissed the top of my head, "You're not any more of a freak show than I am, love. And need I remind you of _our song_? It's all good right?"

"True," I conceded.

"Bella? Will you dance with me to our song?" Edward asked.

"Of course," I answered.

Edward kissed the top of my head again. Since we had decided on the song, he put it in his iPod as well. Edward placed his iPod on the dock, and when the familiar notes started playing, he took a hold of my waist with one arm and held my hand in his. And so we began to dance to the song. _Our song._

_**Hands over my head, thinking, "What else could go wrong?"**_

_**Would've stayed in bed, how can the day be so long?**_

_**Never believed that things happened for a reason**_

_**But how this turned out removed all my doubt**_

_**So believe that for you I'd do it all over again**_

_**Do it all over again**_

_**All I went through led me to you**_

_**So I'd do it all over again for you**_

_**I missed the first train, stood out in the rain all day**_

_**Little did I know**_

_**When I caught the next train,**_

_**That you were to sweep me away**_

_**Guess that's what I waited for**_

_**Never believed that things happened for a reason**_

_**But how this turned out removed all my doubt**_

_**So believe that for you I'd do it all over again**_

_**Do it all over again**_

_**All I went through led me to you**_

_**So I'd do it all over again **_

_**Who ever thought a day gone so wrong**_

_**Would turn out so lovely?**_

_**I'm so glad I found you**_

_**Even though the day went so wrong**_

_**I wouldn't change a thing**_

_**I'd do it**_

_**I'd do it all over again**_

_**Do it all over again**_

_**All I went through led me to you**_

_**So I'd do it all over again**_

_**I'd do it all over for you **_

_**Who ever thought a day gone so wrong**_

_**Could turn out so lovely?**_

As the song came to a close Edward placed a finger under my chin to bring my gaze up to his. I peered into his green eyes that were sparkling with emotion. I smiled at Edward. "Perfect," he whispered as he leaned down to kiss me softly.

**A/N There you go. I'm really not a fan of placing lyrics in my story, but under the circumstances I had to. The song is called "Again" by Natasha Bedingfield. It's off of the **_**Confessions of a Shopaholic Soundtrack. **_**Chef recommends! You know what? you can play the song for free on natasha bedingfield's myspace page. Quick! Go listen to it. It's called "Again" And Quick, review!**


	24. Emmett the Great?

**A/N I'm not Stephenie Meyer and I certainly do not own Twilight.**

**So I've been wrapped up and completely enthralled with **_**Private Tutor**_** by 4theluvofMary. I'm all caught up now so I thought I'd update over here at CLG. If you haven't read **_**Private Tutor**_**, what are you waiting for? Hop to it, Hercules! There's a good story happening plus, the lemons –shakes head- oh, the lemons!**

**Anyhoo, so if you're a fan of Emmett, you'll enjoy this chapter, I hope. It was fun to crank out, because you know Emmett's my homeboy.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 25**

**BPoV**

"Hmmm," I picked up my phone when I heard it beep, indicating an incoming text message. It was from my mom. My eyes widened in surprise, but I had to smile. "Whoa, Edward, Renee is texting? I can't believe it." I looked at the message and smiled even bigger. "Aww, she says _I love you._"

"That's sweet," Edward commented as he went back to reading his novel.

"Yeah," I agreed as I dialed her number. "There's nothing like a random _I love you_ to make you smile."

Not wanting to be outdone, Edward grabbed the back of my hand and kissed it. "I love you."

I smiled at him as I waited for my mom to pick up. "I love you too."

I puckered up for a peck on the lips, and Edward was happy to oblige, but Renee answered before his lips could make purchase with mine so I playfully covered his mouth with the palm of my free hand, "Hey, Mom, I love you too," I said brightly looking at a frustrated Edward.

"Huh?" Renee asked confused.

I giggled. She really was hair-brained sometimes. "I got your text. I love you too."

"Oh, I sent that to _you_?" she asked almost incredulously. Well, hell! Who else would she text to?

I made a face, pursing my lips, and Edward furrowed his brow in curiosity. "Who did you mean to send that text to?" Edward didn't try very hard to stifle his laughter. That time I really did shove him, though he didn't move. He was really enjoying my little humiliation.

"Well, Phil is away in Orlando for a coaches convention so I thought I'd text him. Hmm, I must have scrolled too far down. I have him listed as _Babe_ and must have scrolled down to _Bella_. These touch screens are so sensitive."

I was a little annoyed and barely even heard her as I was staring up at the ceiling while she rambled.

"Oh, but I love you too, baby," she threw in probably realizing she could have sent the same sentiment to her one and only daughter who lived hundreds of miles away.

"Yeah, thanks, Mom," I said dryly, rolling my eyes. I couldn't help but smile slightly though because Edward was in my face mocking me by making a pouty face. I kicked his leg. "Hey, is Eli around?"

Mom put Eli on, and we chatted a little. Eli had been drawing in his room. He was going to send a sketch of Milton to us as soon as he was done with it.

Edward told me to tell Eli hello, which I did, and right before Eli and I were going to hang up, Eli said, "I love you, Bella."

My heart completely melted, and I forgot how silly I felt earlier with my mom. "Thanks, Eli," I grinned. "I love you too, bud." I was still smiling after I hung up the phone. "He's the best," I said to Edward.

Edward nodded in agreement. "That conversation turned around quickly," he commented. Edward was wearing a smirk, probably thinking about how Renee mis-sent the text.

"You enjoyed that didn't you?" I asked him. We both chuckled at the situation. I shook my head, "My mom." I didn't even need to finish the sentence.

"You both are very amusing," Edward remarked as he leaned toward me. "Now may I get the kiss that you denied me earlier please?"

I puckered up again, but instead of the chaste kiss I was expecting, Edward turned it soft and sensual. But before it could go anywhere I broke away reminding him that everyone would be arriving soon.

We were hosting another LaLo session. Plus, Emmett wanted to bake chocolate chip cookies again, but this time he planned on following the directions diligently to prove that he could indeed bake cookies. He really didn't need to prove it to me. He and I had baked over the holidays, and while he refused to attempt the cookies again then, he could do pretty much everything else.

Alice wanted to talk about the wedding, though I wasn't sure what she wanted to talk about exactly. She had everything under control from what I could tell. My dress was already picked out, as were the bridesmaids' dresses.

Milton ran to the door before the doorbell even rang. He was turning into quite the guard dog. One of his favorite pastimes was hanging out on the balcony people watching. If he saw what I guessed he interpreted as anyone suspicious, he'd growl and bark, though I wasn't sure how anyone could do us any harm as we were on the fifth floor. And as for intruders, the only thing I think Milton could do would be to kill them with his cuteness.

Edward got the door. Alice and Jasper arrived first, bringing with them Mina, AKA, Milton's girl. They took a shine to each other when we puppy-sat Mina during the honeymoon. And Eli took a liking to both of them. He had a ball playing and sleeping with the two dogs. Wherever Eli went, Mina and Milton would follow. It was incredibly cute. We even sneaked a picture of the three of them crashed out on the sofa.

Mina had on a lime green sweater that matched Alice's. I wasn't sure who was coordinating with whom. At least Jasper wasn't forced to match the women in his life. He scooped Milton up as soon as he came through the door and gave him a little treat. Jasper was the perfect doggy-uncle, though he was still on a mission to get Milton to fetch. Would the man never throw in the towel? Bassets were one of the most stubborn breeds of dog. I supposed Jasper was a glutton for punishment. Or perhaps he wanted to play with what, he told me on the sly, was _a man's dog_. He loved Mina, of course, but she was more of a dress up toy for Alice than man's best friend.

As soon as Jasper and Alice came in, Emmett and Rosalie were ringing the doorbell. It was the beginning of February and Rosalie was starting her second trimester. Emmett was really sweet, offering Rosalie his arm as they came in, and then he helped her to the sofa.

We all greeted each other, while Alice and I eyed Rosalie's nonexistent belly. She wasn't showing yet. Alice and I actually had a bet going. I guessed that Rosalie wouldn't show until her seventh month and Alice guessed the sixth month. On average, women started showing in their fourth or fifth month, but then Rosalie was no average woman, not even on her worst day.

Emmett brought with him a grocery bag of ingredients and supplies. Probably extra eggs just in case.

"Bella, you ready to shake and bake, little sister?" Emmett asked.

"Of course, Emmett. Who's recipe are we using, mine or the Barefoot Contessa's?"

Emmett made a face. "Yours," he answered grudgingly. "That barefoot lady makes it more complicated than it needs to be. Your recipe is simpler and the cookies are probably better than the contessa's anyway," he shrugged.

"Aww, thanks, Emmett," I smiled.

"Yeah, and plus Rosalie is craving _your_ chocolate chip cookies, Bella," Alice laughed.

Rosalie nodded eagerly. "I've been dreaming of those cookies since the throw down. Emmett's tried to make them, but they're just not the same so I'm making Emmett learn from the master."

My mouth fell open at her statement, "I'm the master?" I looked to Emmett for confirmation.

"Aww, babe, I asked you not to call her that. Now Bella's head is going to get all big and stuff," Emmett complained.

"First of all," Rosalie said to her husband, "_the master_ was the word you used to refer to her yourself."

"_Really_?" I asked Emmett. My tone definitely showed how pleased I was to hear this. Emmett merely rolled his eyes.

"_And_," Rosalie continued, "You're speaking for yourself because I know for a fact you'd get a big head if someone were to call you a master at anything. Normal people are flattered and then move on. Now get to baking me my cookies please."

And so Emmett and I went about our business in the kitchen. I ran through the recipe really quickly for him and we both made a batch. Emmett didn't forget any ingredients, and, truth be told, his batch turned out slightly better than mine. It was quite impressive.

"You have learned well, grasshopper. I think yours are better than mine," I commended Emmett as we helped ourselves to more cookies.

"I decided last minute to add a little more butter than you did," Emmett explained. I nodded. "Ha! So the student is now the teacher." I made a face at him, and Emmett laughed. "You have this recipe memorized, Bella?" he asked me.

I nodded. "Yep, it's pretty easy," I answered. "But if you forget, just look on the back of the bag of chocolate chips," I laughed.

Emmett narrowed his eyes and shook his head, "All this time it was on the back of the bag? And here I thought you were a baking genius."

"Sorry to burst your bubble there, grasshopper," I said.

Alice brought up the subject of the wedding while I was getting my letters and notes ready for the LaLo session. "I still haven't decided where to put Hal in the wedding, Bella. What do you want to do?"

I looked to Edward next to me. He wasn't much help. "Whatever you decide is fine, Bella," he smiled.

"Hmm, this is going to be tough. Should he usher or be a groomsman?" I wondered out loud. "Or a bridesmaid?" The guys were looking at me funny. "Well, Rosalie said she'd be too tired to stand during the ceremony so if you're sitting out, Rose, maybe we can have Hal take your spot and walk down the aisle with Emmett?" I asked brightly.

Everyone laughed and nodded in agreement except for Emmett. "Are you people out of your minds? After what he did to me?" Emmett was staring at both Edward and me, which caused us to erupt in more laughter.

Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper were still in the dark about the feverish untuck/unzip episode so we filled them in while Emmett sat with his arms folded over his chest.

"So we really don't know if Hal did it right?" Rosalie asked through a fit of giggles.

"Right," I answered.

"Oh come on! Open your eyes, people," Emmett bellowed. "I was violated!"

We all just stared at him trying very hard not to sputter out our laughter.

"Probably," Emmett added hesitantly.

"Where did the bad man touch you, Emmett?" Edward asked in a mocking tone as he tilted his head to the side.

"Shut up, Eddie. And, Bella, be cool. Don't make me walk with Big Gay…" I shot a dagger at Emmett who quickly amended his plea, "…with him."

I laughed. "Emmett, relax. Hal's going to be an usher along with Shane. Alice and Jasper will walk together and you'll be walking with Coley." I smiled at the look of relief that replaced his worried expression. "And I still say _you_ untucked and unzipped yourself," I added for good measure.

"It was either Hal or you, Bella," Emmett said gravely.

"Emmett, I was just as sick as you were. I couldn't move, so there's no way I got up to do something as stupid as unzipping and untucking you. That's completely absurd."

"Is it absurd, Bella? Or is this all a part of your master plan?" Emmett asked dubiously.

"My master plan?" I countered.

"You're a master of baking, you could be a master of deceit as well," Emmett said.

I held my hands out, palms up as if to ask what the hell Emmett was talking about.

"You hated that I called Hal _Big Gay Hal_," he began to explain. I nodded. This was true. "You hated it because I thought of it and it was funny and you were jealous so you found a way to try to make me stop."

"No, Emmett, I wanted you to stop because it was an offensive nickname and you're nuts you know that?"

Emmett continued as if he didn't hear me. "So you untucked and unzipped me and made me think it was BGH." We all continued to stare at Emmett as if he really were nuts. "Oh yes, I'll still call him that. BGH is too funny to stop doing so your little plan didn't work," he concluded.

Again, we were all sitting in shocked silence really. I continued to look at Emmett, who was nodding to emphasize his point, and then I turned to everyone else and said, "So I got these letters to LaLo here. The first one's from _Psych Major_ who is apparently crushing on his teacher's assistant. He _thinks_ she may return his feelings. Is it appropriate for him to send her flowers to her apartment for Valentine's Day?"

"Sure why not," was Alice's response. "He should send yellow flowers though, that way he can play it off as friendship if she seems freaked out by it."

"No way," was how Edward, Jasper and Rosalie responded.

"Too creepy," Rosalie explained, to which Edward and Jasper nodded.

"He should just flirt with her first," Emmett suggested, all remnants of bitterness over the Hal discussion gone. "Sometimes a smile can mean more than a dozen roses," he said seriously.

We all looked at Emmett curiously as he nonchalantly took a bite of another cookie and a swig of his latte. I was silently impressed with Emmett as I jotted down his quote before moving on to another letter.

"Okay, this is from the _Naughty Librarian_. _Nice name_," I added facetiously. "She's single and wants to make a move on her also single boss who she's ninety-five percent sure returns her feelings. They have been walking a fine line between friendship and more for a while now. She adds that she won't be working for him much longer because she's transferring to another library in town. Well, this is a no brainer." I looked at Edward who smiled at me. It sounded a little like us.

"Make a move, naughty lady!" Alice said.

"Go for it," Rosalie chimed in.

"Absolutely," Edward and Jasper both agreed.

"Temptation is fun…giving in is even better," Emmett added.

Once again we all furrowed our brows and just looked at Emmett. I opened my mouth to say something but decided to just move on to the next letter. "Okay, last one. _Jennifer_'s alleged best friend _Amy_ is acting weird ever since Jennifer was nominated homecoming queen last fall. While Amy had always had the spotlight in this friendship that started in grade school, Jennifer has come out of her shell and became student body president and an above average player on the basketball team. Amy's been downright mean and rude to Jennifer in front of classmates and teachers. Should she confront Amy?"

"Cut the jealous bitch loose," Rosalie said right away.

"Yeah, it seems Amy doesn't like to share the limelight," Alice added.

"They must not have been real friends to begin with," Edward remarked.

"Friends aren't jealous. Friends love the person you were and the one you've become," Emmett sagely commented.

And once again we stared at Emmett, mouths slightly agape.

"Okay, is anyone else weirded out by the fact that _Emmett_," Jasper burst out gesturing wildly at his brother-in-law, "Emmett of all people is coming up with uncharacteristic, albeit _wise_, advice?" Jasper looked at all of us. "Show of hands?"

We all put up our hands and laughed, including Rosalie. Jasper stole the words from all of us it seemed. Since when did Emmett turn into Mr. Sensitive?

"Yeah, Emmett, where are you coming up with these little gems? Have you been brushing up on love and relationship literature in preparation for the new baby?" I asked. That'd be pretty cool as well as unbelievably respectful and decent of him. My heart warmed and I smiled at the very idea of Emmett curled up on the sofa late at night while Rosalie was sleeping, reading parenting books for the sake of his family, to be a better husband and father. How sweet!

I looked around the table at my friends. They all had a slight smile pulling at their lips as I think they were thinking what I was thinking. Who knew Emmett was such a softy?

Our good thoughts of Emmett came to an abrupt halt as he explained himself, however.

"Books?" Emmett made a face and waved me off. "Psshh. I got these little nuggets of knowledge from the wrappers of the Dove chocolates. You should read them. Every individual little chocolate has its own little message inside. The dark chocolates have the racier messages," he snickered.

Rosalie, Alice, and I stared at him, shaking our heads in disbelief while I heard an _it figures_ and _of course_ come from Jasper and Edward.

"Rosalie usually inhales the chocolates and throws the wrappers to the side, but I take my time and read them. You never know when the little sayings will come in handy," Emmett smiled smugly, completely pleased with himself.

"Nice, Emmett," I commented. "So our next LaLo session should include a bag of Dove chocolates? Why don't we bring in some fortune cookies and a Magic Eight Ball and solve all the world's crises from right here in the HQ?" I laughed.

"I think you're on to something, Bell-LaLo," Emmett nodded.

Rosalie snickered, "Hey, we've already got an _ambassador_!"

Alice laughed out right while my jaw dropped as I sneaked a look at Edward. He had his head bowed, shaking it.

**A/N So I hope you enjoyed this little LaLo session. I thought I'd throw one in as we are nearing the end of the Can't Let Go journey. This story will end with the wedding, which is right around the corner so there will be at least one more chapter, maybe two to three more. Thanks for reading the fluff. Do me a solid and review would you? You know I love to hear from you, the review whore that I am.**


	25. Aha! The Perpetrator

**A/N I do not own Twilight.**

**So, this update is for gemini169 who requested a little more Coley, and not just at the wedding. You know I give the people what they want. Well, I try to anyway. All you have to do is ask.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 26**

**BPoV**

"Wait. Wait. Rewind, Bella. What did you just say?" Emmett asked. He looked a little angry.

"Um, the barisita gave a lid full of whipped cream to Milton when I went to the drive through at Starbucks?" I recounted for him.

"That's what I thought you said," Emmett was shaking his head. "I can't believe you, Bella," he mumbled with disdain.

"What, Emmett?" I asked. "Is whipped cream bad for dogs?" I looked around to everyone else. Edward, Coley, Alice, Jasper, and Rosalie all shrugged.

"I'd like a lid full of whipped cream for myself," Rosalie commented. "That whipped cream from Starbucks is the best!"

"I know right?" I said. "And it was the real stuff, not out of a can. It looked really good, and Milton devoured it. I was a little envious," I giggled.

I had just gotten done telling everyone about Milton's first Starbucks experience on our way to the airport to pick Coley up.

"What were you doing there in the first place, Bells?" Emmett demanded.

"Where? The airport?"

"No, Starbucks."

"I wanted a soy chai and I picked one up for Coley too," I shrugged while Coley nodded to confirm. Where was he going with this?

Emmett continued to shake his head. His expression looked as if he had just tasted something bad.

"What is it?" Coley asked looking from Emmett to me.

"Ohhh, I see. Sorry, Emmett," I apologized.

"What?" Coley asked again.

"Emmett's pissed because I cheated on Bessie and went to Starbucks."

"Ahhh," I heard from everyone around the table.

We were over at the HQ the weekend before the wedding. Coley came early to help Alice with any last minute wedding details and just to visit. Unfortunately, Chad couldn't make it up for the wedding due to his baseball schedule.

"What can I say, Emmett? I really wanted a soy chai and I can't make it quite as well as Starbucks does. I missed the foam," I explained.

"Whatever, Bella. Just tell me you didn't buy a cookie from there too, not when we made such good chocolate chip cookies here."

"I did not buy a cookie, Emmett," I assured him. He let out a sigh of relief. "I did, however, buy a rice crispy square." Emmett was scowling at me again. "What? They're so good, and they're like the size of your fist, Emmett."

"Mmm, yeah, Bella got me one too. It was delish," Coley added.

I heard Emmett mutter, "Judas," at me. I just rolled my eyes.

"Bella, when I open my own coffee shop, I expect you to be loyal to the family business. No more Starbucks unless it's a reconnaissance mission," Emmett ordered.

"Of course I would, Em…wait…what? Are you going to start your own business, Emmett?" I asked.

"I was kicking around the idea, but now I think it's a go," he told us. "Actually, BGH is helping me find some space." Emmett hadn't completely let go of the alleged violation, but he had been able to hang out with us even when Hal was around.

"Wait. _BGH?_" Coley asked.

"That'd be Big Gay Hal," Emmett informed her, to which Coley started cracking up. "See, Bells? Bella thinks it's distasteful," Emmett told Coley as he pointed a thumb at me.

"Oh, it is. It's extremely distasteful," Coley agreed. "But that shit's funny." She pounded Emmett's fist.

"I knew Coca-Coley was down," Emmett nodded.

I shook my head at my friends. "Anyway, the coffee shop?" I brought the focus back to Emmett's business. He told us that he saw how popular they were, especially with the college kids, and thought it would be fun to open and run one of his own. He was already good at making the drinks and making certain baked goods so why not? He liked the idea of being his own boss as well. Everyone was really impressed and excited. Rosalie was beaming at her husband.

"What about teaching?" Coley asked.

"Eh, I'd rather coach than teach the little bastards anyway," he shrugged. "If I owned my own business, I'd be a bit more flexible with my time. Granted it's a lot of work, but I intend to hire good people. Besides, once Rosie has the baby, I want to be around to help out."

"Awww," we girls gushed. How sweet was Emmett?

"Plus, I'd get to boss people around and fire them just 'cause I felt like it," he nodded proudly. Typical. Edward and Jasper snickered.

I made a face. "Nice, Emmett."

"What do you think of the name, guys? _Emmett's Daily Grind_," Emmett was smiling and nodding. "Huh? Huh?" He was very pleased with himself. We followed suit, nodding our approval.

Just then Milton ran to the door right before the doorbell even rang. "That'd be BGH," Edward said as he was about to get up to answer the door.

My mouth dropped open as I stared at him.

"C'mon, Bella. It _is _funny and the acronym won't hurt anybody," he smiled. Hmm, I may have to threaten him with the _ambassador_ reveal to Emmett and Jasper.

I coughed "ambassador" into my fist, which caused Edward to hesitate ever so slightly.

"Right, so I'll just get the door for Hal," he said as nonchalantly as he could. Coley, Rosalie, and Alice didn't miss what went down. They pressed their lips together to keep from laughing.

Edward was just about to open the door when Emmett stopped him. "Hold up, bro," he said as he stood up, unzipped his hoodie and untucked his t-shirt from his track pants and sat back down. We all stared at him in bewilderment.

Emmett looked around at all of our shocked expressions. "So I know who did it," was how he explained his bizarre actions. Did he think Hal was going to unzip and untuck him in front of all of us? We all laughed except for Coley who was giving Emmett the strangest look.

I leaned over to whisper to Coley, giving her a very quick rundown of the feverish untuck/unzip episode. When I finished she was smirking and looking at Emmett_._

"Okay, go," he nodded to Edward who was still chuckling.

"Dude, you're a trip," Coley told Emmett still smirking as she was shaking her head.

"You can never be too careful, Coley," Emmett responded.

"Hello, Hal," Edward greeted him as he came in.

"Hi, Edward," Hal sang. "Hi, all," he said automatically. We heard an audible gasp and then Hal squealed, "Coley! Oh this _is _a treat!" He danced over to hug Coley.

"Hey, Hal. So good to see you again," she laughed as he air kissed both her cheeks and then squeezed her really tightly.

"Oh, my favorite girls! This'll be so much fun!" he clapped quietly but excitedly.

Hal and Alice were planning on holding me hostage overnight with Coley and Rosalie up in his apartment. No boys allowed. It wasn't a bachelorette party per se, they alleged. I was dubious and more than just a little nervous about it.

"Are you girls ready?" he asked. "I just got rid of Shane and Diddy for the weekend so we can literally breathe easier," he informed us.

Alice stood up and got her two suitcases. She handed one to Hal. I shook my head. We were only staying over night. What could she possibly have packed? Rosalie had one suitcase, but it was a pretty good sized piece of luggage. Emmett grabbed the suitcase for her since he didn't want her lugging it upstairs even if we were only going to ride the elevator.

Hal eyed Emmett curiously, pursing his lips to one side.

"What?" Emmett asked a little nervously.

"Don't get me wrong, you know I think you look good," Hal qualified. "But whenever I see you, you're all untucked and unzipped." Hal had always paid very close attention to detail.

"So?" Emmett asked, furrowing his brow.

Hal clicked his tongue, "Well, I just think the whole ensemble would be cleaner," he waved his hand in a circle in front of Emmett's torso, "if you kept the shirt tucked and the hoodie zipped," he shrugged.

None of us could hold in our amusement for the irony of the entire situation, but we tried to not overtly laugh in Emmett's face. Emmett had dropped his jaw a little allowing his mouth to fall open.

Hal scrunched his face apologetically and tilted his head slightly, "Just a suggestion. Don't be mad at me?"

I had to bite my bottom lip to keep from giggling. I noticed all my friends had to do the same.

"No, Hal," Emmett said glumly. "I'm not mad."

"Oh, good!" Hal squealed as he grabbed Emmett's bicep causing Emmett to clearly tense up. "Oh," Hal remarked quietly as he gave it a squeeze. "So healthy." Emmett looked visibly uncomfortable until Hal finally let go of his arm after patting it three times.

I cleared my throat to keep from laughing. "Um, so I still need to grab my bag. I'll be up in a minute, Hal."

He eyed me suspiciously now. "Very well, but if you're not up there in ten minutes I'm sending Alice down," he threatened. I rolled my eyes. As if that were any real threat. He sensed my indifference and so he added, "_And_ Alice will take you shopping." Alice grinned her evil grin. I even saw the glint in her eye. It caused me to shudder.

"I'll be up there in ten minutes," I assured them.

So Jasper and Emmett escorted their wives and Coley upstairs while Edward helped me get my bag. I actually hadn't even packed yet. I walked to our bedroom, grabbed a tote bag, and started to absentmindedly throw items in.

It didn't hit me until just then that I'd be spending the night without Edward. We hadn't slept apart since September. I sighed in dismay.

"Bella, are you okay?" Edward asked.

"Huh? Sure. Why do you ask?"

"Because you just packed Milton's squeaky frog for your little slumber party," he replied.

"I did?" I stopped and looked in the tote. "So I did," I said as I removed it and tossed it to Milton. He was sitting on the bed.

"What's up?" he asked capturing my face in his hands so he could look at me properly.

I sighed again. "I know it's only for one night, but I'm going to miss sleeping next to you," I pouted.

Edward smiled a crooked knowing smile and hugged me. "I'll miss you too, love," he said as he kissed the top of my head.

I snuggled into his chest and Edward held me tighter. "Go lock the door, Edward. Then Alice can't get me."

I could feel Edward shaking with laughter. "I would, but you really don't want me to do that, love. Think of the repercussions. Alice will make us both pay." I went up on my tiptoes and kissed him to try and shut him up. "Mmm, not that it wouldn't be worth it," he hesitated.

I let out a long breath. "No, I'll go," I conceded. I pouted again though.

"I hate seeing that long face, Bella," Edward mused as he stroked my cheek.

"Then do something to cheer me up please."

A smile played at Edward's lips. He looked at the time. "We have three minutes to get you upstairs."

"Uh-oh. The elevator'll be too slow," I pointed out.

"We'll have to take the stairs," Edward said.

I shook my head. I envisioned myself hurrying up the stairs, tripping up them, and breaking who knows what? "I'll never make it, Edward. I'm doomed to shop with Alice!" I cringed at the thought.

"Nope, I'll make it." With that, Edward grabbed my tote bag and scooped me up. I hadn't even finished packing yet, but there was no time. Plus, I was sure amongst what my girlfriends packed between them, I wouldn't be needing anything. He walked quickly out the door and up the stairs, holding me tightly to his chest. It was quite nice actually.

Edward held me so securely to him, I didn't need to hold onto him at all. That allowed for my hands to roam a bit. "Bella?" Edward said in a warning tone.

"Hmm?" I breathed. I had successfully pulled his t-shirt up so I could place my hands on his torso, tracing the hard lines of his chest, kissing the skin there, nibbling on one of his hardened nipples while pinching and rubbing the other one.

"That's not playing fair, Isabella," Edward groaned. I smiled at the sound that fell from his lips, reveling in the truth that I made it happen.

Once at the top landing, Edward set me down kind of abruptly, and before I could ask him what the emergency was, he had me pinned against the wall. His lips and tongue moving from my neck up to my jawline and then my mouth while his hands got the chance to wander as he had my shirt hiked up enough so he could explore the flesh that was hidden underneath the fabric a moment ago. I felt his warm hands on the lace of my bra and moaned. Now he wasn't playing fair.

All too soon we had to quit though, knowing we'd most likely get busted for scandalous hallway behavior if we kept it up. "We'll have to finish this little game tomorrow, love," Edward whispered huskily.

We still had a minute to spare when we made it outside Hal's door when Edward set me down.

"Thanks," I smiled.

"Anytime," Edward said as be bent his head down for a kiss. "You still need to be cheered up?" he asked brightly.

"Sort of," I answered, wondering how he was going to pull this off.

Edward smiled again as he looked over his shoulder, to make sure no one overheard I guessed. We were the only ones in the hall. He was looking me in the eye now. "Okay, Hal didn't untuck or unzip Emmett."

I made a face, "Well, I never thought he did. But how do you know, Edward?"

"Because I did," he said smiling even wider. I couldn't help it. I smiled really wide too and then I started to crack up, which cause Edward to laugh as well. His laughter caused me to laugh even harder. I was actually doubled over with my hands on my knees.

"But why?" I finally asked looking up at Edward from my crouched down position.

He shrugged. "No real reason. Just to mess with him I guess."

I sputtered out more laughter. I had to wipe away a few tears. "Why? Why didn't you tell me this before?"

Edward chuckled some more, "Look at yourself, Bella. You wouldn't have been able to keep a straight face in front of Emmett had you known."

I nodded still giggling. "That's true," I really was a terrible actress. "But why tell me now? I still won't be able to keep a straight face you know." And I couldn't. I stood back upright, took a few deep breaths and even jiggled my arms and legs trying to get the silliness out, but I physically couldn't wipe the smile off of my face.

"Because I wanted to hear you laugh. It's what I live for. Your happiness," Edward said in all seriousness. "I love you, Bella."

"Thank you, Edward," I murmured into his chest as I wrapped my arms around him. "I love you too." But then I thought about Edward untucking and unzipping Emmett and started giggling again, which caused Edward to chuckle as well.

"Who knew Edward Cullen could be so silly," I giggled.

"Is it against the law to be goofy sometimes?"

"Of course not. It was genius though, Edward. You really got Emmett good."

"Yeah, I never would have guessed that a simple unzip and untuck could pay off in such dividends," he chuckled.

"He probably really thinks I did it now," I decided. "He never accused you though…I wonder why?"

"Who knows. But once Emmett gets an idea in his head, it's hard for him to see any alternative. He probably doesn't think I could be so goofy," Edward mused.

"Alright! Break it up out here!" Hal's voice boomed as he threw open the door.

"Hal, I was up here under the deadline," I informed him. "We were just saying goodbye and Edward just told me...a joke," I chuckled the last part as I thought of Emmett. Edward laughed as well.

"It's only for one night for the love of Dolce and Gabana." He noticed us trying to stop laughing and eyed us with one eye closed. "What's going on? Are you laughing at me?"

I was smiling as I shook my head, "No, Hal, it's…" I had to take another deep breath. "It's nothing," I finally managed to utter and then forced myself to press my lips together.

Jasper and Emmett were walking out of Hal's apartment then. "C'mon little bro, let's go shoot some hoops," Emmett bellowed at Edward. But then he looked us over. "Why do you two look weird?" he asked Edward and me.

Edward and I looked at each other and shrugged. "What's so funny?" Emmett asked suspiciously.

I gave Emmett an exasperated look. "Why's everyone so paranoid? We were laughing. What? We can't laugh anymore? Is it not acceptable to have a little chuckle now and then without being prosecuted? Can't people tell jokes without getting the third degree?" My rant sounded a little harsher than I meant it to.

The guys were clearly taken aback by my _slight _overreaction. I was trying not to give anything away. I may have gone too far the other direction though. Emmett put his hands up and backed away infinitesimally while Jasper just had a look of shock on his face. Hal went back inside. "Whoa! Relax, Bells. You wanna laugh? Go ahead and laugh. Knock yourself out, sister. Just retract the claws."

I smiled sheepishly, "Sorry, Emmett."

"Hey, no problem. I like feisty," Emmett smiled and playfully punched my shoulder. "Ready, Eddie?"

"I'll meet you guys downstairs in a minute," Edward told them.

"Okay. Have fun with the girls, Bella," Jasper said.

"And Hal," I added.

Emmett cackled, "Like he said, 'have fun with the girls!'" I rolled my eyes. As they walked away I thought I heard Emmett comparing me to a mama bear protecting her young.

"Very smooth, Bella," Edward smirked, referring to my little tirade.

"Yeah, I thought that went well." We both chuckled again. "Thanks for cheering me up, Edward. Have fun shooting hoops. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Have fun and sleep well, love." Edward kissed me quickly and then I went inside, bracing myself for the pain and torture ahead.

The pain and torture I was anticipating really wasn't painful or torturous. We watched _Pretty in Pink, __The Princess Bride_ and _Sixteen Candles _while getting pedicures and stuffing our faces. Hal actually hired a few nail technicians to do the house call for us.

We had Chinese food delivered. It was pretty much a buffet because everything sounded so good and none of us could decide what we wanted. Afterwards, Hal decided he wanted ice cream, and it _had_ to be Haagen Dazs. He made the trek to the store, and while he was gone, Coley asked about what happened earlier.

"So what was all the commotion at the door when you arrived, Bells. I thought I heard you jump all over Emmett for something. Hal said you looked murderous."

"I did?" I asked. "I didn't mean to." Then I started laughing. "Edward told me something funny, and I tried to not make Emmett suspicious that it was about him." I thought it'd be fine to tell the girls. They'd get a real kick out of it. Besides, Edward knew I couldn't keep stone faced about the untuck/unzip shenanigans now that I knew.

"Do tell, Bella," Rosalie urged. "I love to hear Emmett funnies."

So I told them how Edward was the one to unzip and untuck Emmett, pretty much just to be stupid, and that he never knew how out of hand it would get.

The girls reacted just as I had. It was so dumb, but it was so funny at the same time.

"I never would have even entertained the idea that Edward would do something just so…_random_," Alice giggled.

"I don't know what you've done to him, Bella. Mr. Serious Med Student playing practical jokes? He's a different man now," Rosalie smirked. "Edward Cullen: Ambassador and jokester. Who knew?"

"Ah, Bells, and I caught the whole cough-ambassador thing downstairs. Hilarious," Coley laughed. "So how did he take the ambassador nickname?"

I shook my head, "He looked at me like the freak show I am until he heard Emmett's and Jasper's nicknames then he decided his sounded like a superhero. Which it is," I remarked casually.

The girls all raised their eyebrows. And of course Coley wanted to know the other guys' nicknames. Again, more laughter ensued when she heard about _joystick and megapixel_.

"Did you name Chad's?" I asked.

"But of course. His _is_ actually a superhero though: _Batman_," Coley grinned. We all groaned and laughed at the same time. Perfect.

"What would the guys think of us if they knew we were so crass as to name their body parts?" Alice asked.

"Hey, Edward already knows," I said. "He said it was comforting to know that we act just as piggish as they do. I guess it levels the playing field."

"Of course we're just as dirty as they are," Rosalie said. "We're just slicker and way more discreet. Men are stupid about being pigs." We all nodded in consensus.

After that, we talked a little about how quick Edward's and my engagement was. I asked if they thought it was weird that we were getting married so quickly after finally getting together.

"Bella, you belong together. It's obvious. Why waste any more time?" Alice asked.

I smiled, "That's exactly what Edward said."

"Plus, it's not like you guys didn't know each other before," Coley added. "It's just the right time for you now. And I couldn't be happier for you, Bells." Coley got up and hugged me. "You deserve this happiness," she added as she kissed my forehead.

"Thanks, Cole. So, girls, any marriage advice for me?" I asked. "Rosalie, you've been married the longest."

Rose thought a moment. "Don't go to bed angry."

I nodded. "Of course not," I remarked.

"Choose your battles," Alice said. I nodded again, though I couldn't imagine Edward and I fighting about anything. I kept that to myself. I was sure my girlfriends would give me grief if I told them just how perfect Edward was.

"Don't hit below the belt," Coley added. I nodded again. "Seriously, don't. It could wreck your chances of having children. And you can't go and hurt something you took the trouble of naming anyway." We all laughed.

When Hal got back we had delicious ice cream while Alice went through Hal's kimono collection. She insisted we all model them. Rosalie and Coley were all about it. I was reluctant at first, but the kimono was actually very soft and comfortable, and I felt kind of fancy really.

We had so much fun, it was just like slumber parties Coley and I used to have. Except back in the day, Coley and I would share a bed. At Hal's posh slumber party, we each had our own beds and our own rooms.

"I love you girls, but I can't sleep in the same room as you. You know Bella talks in her sleep. She'd be keeping me up, and I need my beauty rest," Hal explained. "Anyway, making my guests sleep on the floor or on air mattresses is _not_ how I roll, and I refuse to share my bed. Sweet dreams, bitches," he sang as he blew us kisses and sashayed off to his room in his kimono.

**A/N Ah, you gotta love Hal, if only for his kimono collection. You wanted an update, and there you are. You realize this brings us closer to the end right? I'm thinking about doing a bonus chapter after the wedding, however. A few months later, you know with Rosalie having the baby and all and Emmett's Daily Grind opening up. Whatcha think? You likey? Review please!**


	26. CHA CHING!

**A/N I don't own Twilight.**

**Hey there. Before I forget, I wanted to give a shout out to Juliette89, "my #1 French fan" (And I did not put her up to saying that either, people) She was craving a little lemonade in the form of more detail in the stairs scene of the last chapter so I threw a little something together, a lemon zest, if you will, and was just going to send it to her but decided to stick it into the chapter. So there you go. If you liked that little bit, you have her to thank. If you read the chapter the first day I posted it and reviewed, you know I sent the lemon zest to you. (I'm telling you, it pays to review!) Those of you who read it the first day and didn't review, you can go back and take a look if you wish to.**

**I had a lot of fun writing this one, lemon and all. Okay, I may have had a couple of margaritas prior to writing this one. No, I wasn't drunk, but I was feeling pretty good. I hope you like it as well. As always, REAR. Thanks!**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 27**

**BPoV**

The next morning we girls and Hal got up and lazed around for a bit. We made a plan to go to a late breakfast with the guys, the same omelet place we took Coley the day Gerald outted me as LaLo. The girls were getting ready, and I was about to head back downstairs to get ready at my place since I apparently only packed pajamas, a comb, and the remote to the television in our room. Man, I really wasn't paying attention to what I grabbed.

"Bella, we can get you ready up here, I've got more than enough outfits that you can borrow," Alice said.

"Uh, no thanks, Alice. I'd like to shower in my own bathroom and get ready there," I responded. Alice pouted a bit. I knew she wanted to dress me. She'd dress anyone who'd let her.

"She just wants to get back down to see her ambassador," Coley laughed. I smiled. She knew me too well.

"But I'll take an outfit anyway, Alice," I said to appease her. Alice grinned and clapped. "As long as it's not too ostentatious for eggs," I qualified.

Alice dug around her suitcases and found a simple ensemble, consisting of jeans and blouse, and handed it to me.

"Thanks, Alice." I turned to go but she stopped me. I looked at Alice and she had the most heartbreaking expression on her face. "What is it, Alice?" I asked. "Are you all right?"

"Bella?" she tilted her head still looking at me sadly, "I know shopping with me was supposed to be your punishment for not getting up here in time, and you did get up here in time but…"

"What is it, Alice?" I asked warily, a little annoyed. I knew what she was going to ask me, but she had me thinking something was genuinely wrong.

"Can I take you shopping please?" she begged.

"Alice, I don't need anything."

Alice, Rosalie, Coley, and Hal all looked at me like they didn't understand what I had just said.

"So?" Hal asked.

I shrugged. "So why go shopping if I don't need anything?"

After a collective gasp, they all looked at me with what appeared to be a mixture of disdain and pity.

"Bells, after all these years with us as friends? Has nothing sunk in?" Coley asked.

"You don't have to _need_ anything to go shopping," Rosalie said.

"Well, that's how I operate," I defended myself.

Alice sighed, thinking hard. "Alright, Bella. Think of shopping like…sex." Well, that got everyone's attention. "You don't _need_ sex, but it feels so good so why not? In fact," she continued, "I'd argue that shopping is good for you, healthy even. It serves a purpose, sure. We shop when we need to get something, but it helps to release pent up frustration."

I made a face at her but Alice continued. "Hey they don't call it retail therapy for nothing." The others were nodding as if what Alice was saying were a breakthrough in psychosocial behavior.

"I can't believe you're comparing shopping to sex," I said in disbelief of the entire analogy.

"And like good sex," Alice continued, "You want to really take your time and enjoy the experience of browsing, trying on different items, and then making the final purchase," Alice concluded with a smile. She was quite pleased with herself.

"So shouldn't you be shopping with Jasper and not me?" I asked. Alice narrowed her eyes at me and I laughed a little. "Okay, okay. So if I understand correctly, browsing is foreplay, and trying on items is…let's call it experimentation," Alice nodded, pleased that I was able to follow along and summarize what she just said. "Then the uh, climax would be…"

"Cha-ching!" everyone said together. We all laughed.

"When the register rings and the cashier hands you your items. Exactly!" Alice nodded giggling.

"Okay, so that's one method of shopping slash sex. Granted, it's a good method and clearly has worked for you all these years," I said. "But what about an alternative approach like mine?" My friends all perked up, happy I was at least playing along. Thinking about Edward's and my quickie in the hotel bathroom, I continued, "What's wrong with knowing you need something so badly, you don't want to waste your time browsing and trying things on? You know exactly what you want and you make quick work about getting it. That could be just as satisfying, no? Wham, bam, thank you ma'am? You still end up with the cha-ching," I concluded.

And slowly but surely, my girlfriends nodded their approval of my alternative method to shopping slash sex.

"I think we can all agree that there is a place for both methods in our lives," Coley said.

Everyone giggled their consensus. "Okay, so can I still take you shopping, Bella? Let's compromise. We can each try the other's method. Besides, you'll need something for your little honeymoon, right?"

I rolled my eyes. I couldn't believe I was agreeing to this. "Fine. We can go this afternoon." Rosalie and Coley both cheered since they would get to go as well. I guessed I had to pick up a couple things. Edward only had a week off after the wedding for his Spring Break. He had school so we couldn't go on an extended honeymoon like he wanted. We were just going for a week to the Dominican Republic. That was good enough for me, but Edward insisted that once the school year ended, we'd go on at least a month long honeymoon, and I wasn't allowed to object. We'll see about that. A month seemed a bit much, not to mention expensive, but really I didn't want to be away from Charlie that long. We still had time to discuss it so I tentatively agreed.

After I caved and said yes to shopping, they allowed me to go back downstairs to my apartment. Rose and Alice still needed to let Emmett and Jasper know about the plan for breakfast so we agreed to meet at the restaurant in an hour and a half.

I entered the apartment quietly. Well, I tried to anyway. Milton came barreling toward the door before I even got it open. I bent down to pet him. "Aww, I missed you too, Milton," I told him as I scratched his head. I looked up and smiled when I heard Edward's voice.

"Good morning, love. I didn't expect you so early."

I got up to hug and kiss Edward. "Should I go back?" I asked.

"No way," he chuckled holding me tighter. "I just thought they'd keep you all day. This is a pleasant surprise though."

"Well, we're meeting in an hour and a half for breakfast, and I wanted to come back down here to get ready and so I could see you," I confessed.

"That's nice to hear, but did you have to sell your soul to the devil in order to make the escape?"

"Close, I agreed to go shopping with the girls later," I informed him.

Edward raised his brows, "Wow! You really did miss me!"

Edward's lips found mine and I was able to breathe in his scent. "Mmm, yes I did, very much," I told him.

"I missed you too, Bella. I really couldn't sleep very well. Milton is good company, but I'd rather have you here you know."

"I'm sorry you didn't sleep well. You know, my cold feet missed your warm legs," I smiled.

"Ahh, yes. Believe it or not, I missed your cold feet. Specifically, my legs missed the way your feet worm their way underneath my knees and calves," he chuckled.

"Well," I mused, " We still have a little bit of time before we have to be anywhere. Can we go back to bed for a bit and you can warm up my feet?" We both looked down at my feet. I came in barefoot and my feet were cold.

"Absolutely," Edward said in a husky voice. "And nice toes by the way." I wiggled my toes and smiled my thanks. He noticed the pedicure.

We looked at Milton and both said, "Milton. House." And Milton, like the good boy he was, ran into his crate. We chuckled at his obedience. Edward latched the door and we walked down the hall.

"He missed you too you know," Edward pointed out. "Poor guy was wandering around the apartment looking for you."

"Aww," I gushed. "I missed him too. Oh," I yelped as Edward scooped me up like he did the day before. I guessed it was time to finish our little game.

"So," Edward murmured into my ear. "Where were we when you had to join the girls?"

We were in the bedroom and Edward had set me down on the bed. I pulled his t-shirt off of him.

"I think I was doing something like this," I said before I started kissing his chest and working his taut nipples like I did on the stairs. Again, a moan escaped Edward's lips.

"And I believe I was doing something like this," Edward breathed as he pulled off my tank top and set to work licking and kissing my skin. His lips found my nipples and I automatically arched my body to get closer to his mouth. I allowed a moan to escape as well. I couldn't help it; Edward's warm mouth and tongue on my body sent sensations through me that felt so good I couldn't even begin to articulate how it felt. Moans, groans, gasps, and whimpers were the simplest ways to express the ecstasy I was in when Edward and I were together, engaged in _more._

"God, Bella, I love hearing those sounds from you," Edward whispered. "You don't know how sexy you sound. Do you know what that does to me?"

Edward had shimmied off my ASU boxers along with my underwear that were soaking wet with want for him.

"What's it do to you, Edward?" I managed to ask as I scooted up on the bed in order to make room for him while Edward rid himself of his boxers as well, revealing the ambassador to me. He was just so glorious, long, and hard. I licked my lips. I wanted Edward; my _body_ needed Edward.

"It makes me want to stop being a gentleman and just fuck you senseless," he said in a thick voice. His tone caused me to gasp as my core reacted to the words he had used, clenching involuntarily. He knew what _he_ did to _me_. "You want that, Bella? You want me to fuck you senseless?" he growled.

I bit my lip and nodded, "Mmmhmm."

"Say it, Bella. Tell me what you want, love."

"God, yes, Edward. Do it. Fuck me senseless," I prompted.

We were sideways in the middle of the bed. With all the undressing that took place on the bed, and possibly from Edward's restless night of sleep, the pillows were scattered, and I happened to fall back on the bed with one under my hips when Edward sheathed the ambassador inside me. I don't know if it was the angle I was positioned in due to the pillow or what, but I moaned in ecstasy upon each thrust, and each moan made Edward thrust with even more fervor. I didn't think he had ever pounded so hard or deep into me before, and I clenched him as tightly as I could with each stroke. The intensity increased by the fact that we were staring at each other; our love for each other being conveyed through the depths of our fixed eyes.

Finally, my lips parted, letting out a long breath and moaning Edward's name while he moaned mine as my walls gripped Edward, milking him as he spilled into me. It was pure bliss as our bodies both writhed and shook with our climax. CHA-CHING indeed!

"Wow!" Edward breathed while nuzzling my neck and working his way up to my earlobe.

"I'll say," I muttered. "That was all right."

"You think it was the night apart that opened the gates of passion?" Edward asked. "I don't think we've ever come harder than that."

I giggled. "I think it was this pillow actually." Edward pulled his head back to take a look at what I was talking about. "The love pillow is all good," I declared.

Edward pouted just a bit and I laughed, "You know, I had a little something to do with it too," he said.

"Oh, I'm aware, Edward. The ambassador and the love pillow are a dangerous combination, I assure you," I said kissing his pouty lips. "Now get up. We have people to meet and those omelets aren't going to eat themselves."

Grudgingly, we got up, got showered and dressed. I texted Coley to tell her we were ready to go. She came down to our apartment and we set off to the restaurant. Hal couldn't join us. He was too busy obsessively cleaning his apartment back up, but he sent air kisses our way via Coley.

We had the time and it was a nice day so we walked to the restaurant. It was around the corner, like everything else, from our place.

"So how was basketball, Edward?" Coley asked.

"Yeah, who'd you guys play?" I asked.

Edward chuckled uncomfortably, which was strange. "Funny you should ask. We got into a bit of trouble last night," he answered cryptically.

"What happened?" Coley and I both asked. Curiosity colored her tone while urgency colored mine. I didn't like hearing that Edward and the guys got into trouble. I immediately imagined the worst: a mugging or something. But he would have told me about that right away or they would have called us last night if it happened.

"Well, we met these guys to play a pick up game of basketball. We've played them before. You've heard me mention Laurent and his buddies James and Aro?" I nodded. "We played three on three. Emmett must have been feeling kind of cocky because he and Laurent made a bet."

"Uh-oh," I said. "So I take it you guys lost?"

Edward nodded. "We're usually better than they are. I think they've only beaten us once before out of ten games or something," Edward said shaking his head. "But my head wasn't in the game and Jasper played especially badly as well. We were all terrible really."

"So how much money did you lose?" Coley asked. I steeled myself for the answer. Not that losing a little money was that big of a deal to Edward and the guys; they could afford to lose whatever, but the thought of losing money over something like basketball seemed ridiculous to me.

"Well, it wasn't money Emmett and Laurent bet. None of us need the money." Coley and I gave Edward a strange look, urging him to come out with it already. He nudged me as he pointed to Rosalie and Emmett heading our way. Emmett was in sweats as usual but today he had his hood up. It was a little chilly but not too bad.

"You see, Laurent has these really long braids and James has really long hair as well," Edward began to explain.

"Oh my god!" Coley and I both shouted.

"No!" I said.

"Yes," Edward confirmed as Emmett and Rosalie approached us.

"No!" Coley looked to Rosalie who made a face and nodded in confirmation.

Right on cue, Emmett pulled his hood down revealing a cleanly shaved head.

Coley and I were stunned speechless for a good ten seconds. We both reached out to feel his baldhead. Emmett bent forward so we could get to it. It was pretty smooth.

"Well," I said finally, "at least you don't have a misshaped skull, Emmett."

"Dude, I can't believe we lost to that douche Laurent," Emmett said shaking his shiny head in disbelief.

"Dude, I can't believe you lost to a guy _named_ Laurent," Coley laughed. "Wait," she said. "If you guys lost, how come Edward still has his hair?"

That's right. I looked to Edward with a panicked expression on my face. It wasn't that I was really superficial. It was just that I really, really, really loved Edward's hair. It was silky and beautiful and I loved winding my fingers in his locks when we kissed, and it always smelled so nice. And I couldn't even bring myself to imagine Edward with a shaved head. It went against nature. It was wrong.

Edward returned my stare with a rueful gaze of his own. "Well, they know we're getting married on Friday and were kind enough to make me _pay up_ afterwards. I'm sorry, Bella," he said wrinkling his nose.

"You have to shave your head?" I asked even though I already knew the answer.

"Yeah," he answered morosely. "They're letting Jasper wait too. We explained how Alice would go ape shit if he came home with a shaved head without any kind of notice and that Alice would most likely hunt them down too. They know Alice, at least Laurent does, so they were sufficiently scared," Edward explained.

"Alice!" I said. "Emmett, does Alice know yet?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I don't know if Jasper had the balls to tell her yet."

"How come they didn't let you wait?" Coley asked Emmett.

"Well, they needed someone to do it, as collateral I guess. So I manned up and took one for the team. I knew Edward needed his for the wedding and all. And as for Jasper, his dainty ass needed a little time to process the repercussions of the bet."

"Ahem," Rosalie cleared her throat and gave her husband a pointed look. I thought maybe she was defending her brother a little.

"Right. Also, it was my stupid idea," Emmett conceded. "I'm sorry, Bella," he apologized. "I didn't mean to ruin your wedding."

"Aww, Emmett," I hugged him. "The wedding's not ruined. It's just hair. It'll grow back. I actually don't care that you shaved your head. I _am_ thankful that Edward can wait though." I let go of Emmett and stood back over by Edward and Coley. "The person you need to worry about is your sister. Edward's right. She's going to go effing bananas! And here she comes now. It was really nice knowing you, Emmett," I said through clenched teeth. "I'll really miss you."

"Good luck, man," Coley said apologetically.

"Can I have your X-Box?" Edward asked brightly.

Emmett's eyes widened and he automatically put his hood back up, but it was too late.

Alice left Jasper in the dust as she came charging at her eldest brother. She had the look of murder on her face. I glanced back at Jasper. He looked guilt ridden and very frightened.

"_Emmett Cullen_," Alice spat out acidly. "_WHAT. THE. HELL. HAVE. YOU. DONE_?" Alice paused after each word she uttered, underscoring what we already knew. Alice was PISSED!

We didn't want to face Alice's wrath, so the rest of us went inside and got a table while Alice let Emmett have it out on the sidewalk. It was a good thing Mo, the owner, knew us, because he probably would have called the police otherwise. We just told him Alice was a little upset with her brother, but that there most likely wouldn't be any bloodshed.

We watched from our window table at the antics going on outside. Alice was waving her hands, very animatedly, and pointing a lot while Emmett stood there and _took one for the team_. They didn't seem to care, or at least Alice didn't, when they received shocked looks from patrons leaving and coming in. Alice got on her phone and talked to someone for a couple minutes as well. They were out there a good ten minutes before joining us.

They sat down quietly next to their spouses. There was awkward silence for a minute while we were all trying to gage Alice's temper.

"So, are we still on for shopping this afternoon?" I asked cautiously.

"Oh, absolutely," Alice smiled as if all the world was fine, like her eldest brother didn't just have to shave his head due to a really stupid bet over basketball and that her husband wouldn't have to shave his beautiful head of hair as well. "I can't wait to try your method of shopping, Bella."

"Um, thanks for leaving Emmett alive," I added. Everyone smiled and I even heard a couple chuckles.

"Well, we need him for the wedding and I didn't want Rosalie to have to raise the baby on her own," Alice smirked.

"Thanks, Alice," Rosalie grinned. "The baby and I appreciate it."

"So who were you calling in the middle of tearing Emmett a new one?" Coley asked.

Alice smiled sweetly. "I talked to that Laurent character. I've saved Edward and Jasper's hair from being shaved by the way," she said casually.

"How'd you do that?" we all asked.

"Emmett?" Alice prompted her brother.

"When my hair grows back, I have to shave it again two more times since it was my dumb bet with Laurent. Dude, he's such a douche!" Emmett spat.

"Well, that _douche,_" Alice said, "agreed that neither James nor Aro would have wanted to shave their heads had they lost. That stupid bet was made in secret and they didn't tell the other guys about it until after the game," Alice shook her head.

Coley and I stared at Emmett with our mouths agape. Edward hadn't mentioned that he didn't know about the bet until after they had lost.

"So it seemed only fair that the two idiots that made the bet were the two that would have to pay up."

"Wow, and he went for that?" Edward asked. "Laurent can be an asshole sometimes."

Alice smiled, "Oh, I know. Well, also, I'm doing his wedding and I threatened to accidentally double book the reception hall. That would be most unfortunate as they have important guests that have already RSVP'd."

"Damn, Alice," Coley said shaking her head, "You _are_ a bitch. I love it!"

Alice smiled and kissed the air in Coley's direction. "What can I say? Laurent _is_ a douche."

**A/N Haha. Yay! Edward gets to keep his hair. I know. Were you sweating a little about that? Thank goodness for Alice, right? Just another fun one to write before we get to the last bit here. Next up is the wedding then the bonus and that's it, kids. Thanks for reading. Please make my day and review!**


	27. Mr and Mrs Cullen

**A/N (sigh) I still don't own Twilight.**

**Show of hands, who was worried about Edward's hair? I was actually entertaining the idea of a shaved-head Edward but my sister would have probably broken my thumbs for that. I can still type without my thumbs, however, there would be no spaces between my words so you'd be reading a giant run-on sentence.**

**So the time has come, my friends. It is with great joy that I bring to you what you've been waiting for: the wedding. It is also with great sadness that I bring to you the last chapter. It's been a fun ride. Thanks for reading this crazy stuff. Your responses have been amazing, and I'm so glad I didn't scrap this story after the first few chapters like I was about to do. Here we are over twenty chapters later. I've had so much fun writing, even throughout my 3****rd**** grade student teaching experience. Your reviews kept me going, and the number of readers who have put me on their favorite stories list and favorite author list is really humbling. Thanks! You're my favorite readers. Anyone who reads my stories is my favorite. Hehe. And if you review? Well, you're my favoritest.**

**A special merci and bonne chance (that's thank you and good luck) to juliette89 who, along with her posse, Elizabeth et Jennifer, are going to translate Can't Let Go en Francais. (Can you tell I'm a total hack in French?) That's quite a daunting task. I hope to read it in French and miraculously be fluent. I can dream can't I?**

**Alright, I'll shut up now. I hope I don't disappoint, but here it is. REAR as always!**

**Can't Let Go**

**Chp 28**

**BPoV**

Friday, March 20, 2009, the first day of spring. My wedding day! The day we became Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen.

I was both sad and excited when I woke up that day. I was sad because Alice had kicked Edward out the night before, trying to cling to a little tradition I supposed, and I missed not being with him. It seemed silly to throw him out of his own home. I mean, we already lived together so what was the point? But I was excited, of course, because of the wedding. He and Jasper picked up Renee, Phil, and Eli from the airport and went straight to Alice and Jasper's house while Alice and Coley transformed the HQ into the wedding HQ.

Alice equipped Edward, Emmett, Coley, and me each with a one-inch binder containing any instructions, diagrams, maps, and pertinent information regarding our roles in the ceremony, reception, and anything wedding related. I could see why Alice was so in demand as a wedding planner. She was very thorough.

"Really, Alice? I need to put on the right shoe before the left one?" I asked her as I flipped through my copy of what I dubbed the Wedding Manifesto.

"It's for good luck, Bella," she answered quickly.

"Really?" Coley and I both asked.

Alice grinned sheepishly. "No, I just made that up. I'm actually just a control freak."

"Ahh," we nodded in understanding.

My phone buzzed then. I smiled. It was Edward. I grabbed my phone about to answer it when Alice butted in. "This is the last time, Bella! The next time you talk to him, you'll be saying your vows!" She had one hand on her hip and her tone conveyed that she meant business. "Five minutes," she warned. How could so much evil fit into one tiny person?

"Sure, sure," I said as I answered the phone and walked briskly to my bedroom. I guess I couldn't blame her. It was the third call from him since I had woken up. Granted, I had only been up for two hours, but it was really her fault. If she hadn't sent Edward away he wouldn't have felt the need to be calling me.

"Hey," I said breathlessly into my phone.

"Hey," Edward said back. "Why are you out of breath?"

"Running from the evil pixie," I smiled.

"Ah, good luck. You can run, but you know you can't hide."

"I know. She's allowed me five minutes and then we can't talk again until we're at the alter. So what's up?"

"Nothing much. I just wanted to hear your voice again, love."

"Aww, you're so sweet," I smiled into the phone as I absentmindedly flipped through the binder. We chit chatted about our morning since our last conversation a half hour prior. Edward had a little breakfast. I had a bowl of cornflakes myself. I joked that Alice had a big bowl if bitch that morning as well. Then something caught my eye. "Hey, Edward, do you have the Manifesto in front of you?"

"Yep," he answered. "Why?"

"Have you looked through the whole thing?" I asked.

"No, Emmett threw it in the back of his car yesterday. He said he'd tell me everything I needed to know. I had my doubts so I just got it back this morning."

"Okay. Good call on that, by the way. Turn to page twenty-three would you?" I waited for Edward's reaction.

"You're kidding me. She has illustrations and descriptions of approved church kisses?" he asked incredulously. There was the quick peck, the peck and pause, the lingering lips, and lingering lips two point oh with minimal tongue action. I could imagine Edward shaking his head at his sister. "Ridiculous. Well, do you have a preference?"

I laughed. "Why don't you just surprise me?"

"Okay, I will. I wonder what else she has outlined in here," Edward mused. I heard him flipping pages. "Page thirty-two. Things to do on the honeymoon if we get bored."

"I have a picture of you on that page," I said.

Edward laughed, "And I have a picture of you. Oh, look on the back of that page, Bella."

I turned the page, read it, and laughed. _If you have to consult this book while on your honeymoon then your marriage is doomed! Now go play!_

"She's nuts, Edward," I laughed.

"I know this, Bella."

"Bellll-aaaaaa! Get off the phone. NOW!" Right on cue, Alice bellowed from the living room.

"Did you hear that, Edward?" I asked.

"Um, I think they heard her in Philadelphia. Maybe even in Bahrain," he said sarcastically. "Go before she throws your phone out the window."

"Okay."

"I'll see you at the church, soon-to-be Mrs. Cullen," I heard the smile in his voice. "I'll be the insanely happy guy in the tux waiting for you at the alter. I love you."

"I love you too, soon-to-be...wait you're already Mr. Cullen…soon-to-be my husband. I'll be the lucky lady in the fancy dress."

"It's a date. See you there."

After I hung up, Coley and Alice did my hair and makeup and then had me in my dress. I didn't really get into dressing up. I actually avoided it as much as possible, but this dress made my face light up. Alice did a great job of picking it out. Granted, I had ultimate veto power, but she did the grunt work of paring down choices for me. But once I laid eyes on this dress, I fell immediately in love, if you could do that with clothing. Alice and Coley claimed that you could.

It was a sleeveless slim-fitted A-line gown with a V-neckline and beaded embellishments. I actually felt like a princess in it. It was simple yet beautiful. I even loved the way they had my hair, now grown past my shoulders, in loose curls and partially put up. I looked fit to marry Edward.

The girls looked nothing less than gorgeous in their bridesmaid dresses. They were Grecian goddesses in the platinum colored column gowns. We kept the colors neutral so we could incorporate the colorful tulips and hyacinth into our spring bouquets. Once we were ready to leave for the church, Alice beckoned Hal and Shane down. Hal scooped me up and carried me bridal style so I wouldn't get my dress dirty or risk falling and/or injuring myself right before the main event. And we all knew that could totally happen so I didn't mind.

Hal and Shane looked dashing in their tuxes. In the limo, Alice gave them last minute instructions as the ushers. Hal was not to show disdain for anyone's choice of attire no matter how unflattering. These were friends and family, after all.

"What do you take me for, Alice? I would never do that!" Hal sounded offended.

"And no snarky comments about their hair or makeup either," Alice continued as if he hadn't said anything.

Hal made a face as if to say Alice spoiled all his fun. "Do I have to tell the women they look good when they don't?" he looked worried.

"No, you don't have to lie, but be nice!" she pointed at him.

"Says the she-devil," Hal commented quietly.

The ceremony went by quickly after Edward and I said our vows. That part seemed to happen in slow motion. Charlie had walked me down the aisle after a little soliloquy on his part. That part, too, was in slow motion and forever seared into my memory. He actually made me cry. My tough as nails, chief of police father got uncharacteristically sentimental.

"Bells," he started. "Edward better know how lucky he is. I don't give my baby girl away to just anyone. I know I haven't said this before, but thanks for coming to live with me in high school. I'm grateful I was able to reconnect…well, in my own quiet and gruff way I guess…with my little girl. I really loved having you around. You make me real proud. I hope you know that. And when you went back to Phoenix for college, it broke my heart, but I knew I had to let you go. I'm sorry it took me getting sick to bring you back, but I sure am glad you're back. I love you, kid. And I feel blessed to have made it this far to see you get married to such a good man. I know I won't be around for as long as I'd like, but knowing Edward will be there to take care of you…" My dad was nodding his gratefulness for Edward, too choked up to articulate it.

I was shaking my head not wanting to even think about Charlie not being around. I hugged him tightly. "You'll be fine, Dad. You're doing so great. Don't even say it. Don't even think it. I love you too you know. And thanks for everything."

Normally, Alice probably would have yelled at me for messing up my makeup, but she handed me some Kleenex and gave me a hug right before it was time to walk down the aisle. She even had a moment to freshen me up.

When we heard the Wedding March, Charlie and I knew it was show time. I heard gasps as my friends and family laid eyes on me, probably impressed that I cleaned up so nicely. Sue, Esme, and Renee were dabbing Kleenex at their eyes. Rosalie, Hal and Shane were beaming. Hal and Shane looked like they were day dreaming at the same time, off in LaLa-land. Eli, adorable in his little tux as the ring bearer, looked stunned to see me dressed in my gown. I had to laugh a little at his expression.

Coley and Alice were both grinning ear to ear, as were Jasper and Emmett, shaved head and all, both very handsome in their tuxes as well. Their smiles were infectious, and I couldn't help grinning myself. But once Edward and I locked eyes, my grinned wavered. All the love I felt for Edward rose up from deep within me, just when I didn't think it was even possible to feel any more love for him. My bottom lip was shaking as I attempted to keep at bay the overwhelming emotion and the tears of joy that were about to overtake me.

Edward looked beyond magnificent in his stark black tux that contrasted gloriously against his alabaster skin. His bronze locks were actually combed very nicely, and I fought off the instinct to run my fingers through them. But his eyes…his green eyes were glistening with what I assumed to be tears of joy as well that threatened to spill over. Charlie gave me away to Edward. Edward shook Charlie's hand but then grasped both of my hands as soon as he was able to. His eyes never left mine throughout the entire ceremony just as mine never left his.

Somehow we were able to find our voices, shaky as they were, and repeat after the minister. We exchanged rings and when it was time to kiss the bride, Edward surprised me with the lingering lips three point oh, which he made up on the spot. It was exactly like the two point oh except he bent me backward a bit adding a little dip to the original kiss.

"I don't think that was a pre-approved kiss," I laughed after we kissed. "A blatant contravention of the Manifesto."

"Sue me," he grinned.

We walked back up the aisle as husband and wife and made it through the bubbles our guests were blowing at us as we headed toward the limo. We got to the country club and took pictures in the courtyard there while our guests had wine and hors d'oeuvres in the reception hall.

"You look unbelievably stunning by the way. _Fancy dress_ doesn't do this masterpiece justice," Edward told me once the reception was underway.

"Thanks," I smiled. "You don't look too shabby yourself."

Edward shook his head, "I look like a hobo compared to you, Bella. Don't tell Coley, but you look like you stepped right out of a storybook, and I mean that in the best way possible, love." Edward pressed his lips to mine, unashamed that we were in a room full of people. But then we were the reason for this little party so I didn't feel ashamed either. We earned some whistles and catcalls from our guests. Edward and I chuckled as we looked around the room.

We didn't have a huge reception, only about eighty people there, which was quite conservative if you were a Cullen. I just wanted a really intimate party, and Alice accommodated me as best she could.

The reception hall was decorated perfectly. Alice really was amazing. Our bouquets were echoed throughout the small ballroom. The fragrant flowers were in bud vases for our guests to take home. Platinum colored satin and chiffon were draped around the perimeter of the room with white lights strung up to accent. She even had lights sparkling from the ceiling, bringing the stars that I loved seeing in Phoenix to me here in Seattle. It was beautiful.

Alice hired a five-piece orchestra to play soft jazz during the cocktail hour and our favorite songs for the rest of the reception.

Charlie was offered a chance to make a speech at the reception, but he looked at Alice and me like we were crazy when we presented the option to him weeks before. Public speaking wasn't his forte, specifically public speaking bordering on being sentimental.

As my maids of honor, both Coley and Alice had prepared a speech.

"Hi," Coley started. She introduced Alice first, "This is Alice, also known as the Forks me."

"And this is Coley, otherwise known as the Phoenix me," Alice said. Everyone laughed as Alice continued. "We both have the pleasure of serving as Bella's maids of honor. Oh, I mean _matrons of honor_, though we both reject the _matron _moniker."

"That's right," Coley confirmed. "Though we are both happy to accept the roles of co-best friend to our Isabella Marie," she smiled. "Bells and I go way back, of course, to grade school. I won't divulge too many embarrassing things, but I will say that back in the day, seventh grade I think, we did discuss our criteria for the perfect husband." Coley looked at me grinning like the Cheshire cat and I turned beet red. I heard chuckling coming from everyone, including Edward. "And that _perfect husband_," she used air quotes, "would have pretty eyes, really good hair, and be able to do just about anything, so basically Superman," Coley smirked. "I don't recall us saying anything about unconditional love though, do you, Bells?" she asked. I just shrugged and shook my head, too embarrassed to say anything. "Let's give our adolescent selves the benefit of the doubt and assume that the unconditional love was an automatic." I nodded my consent as Edward rubbed my back. I knew he was enjoying Coley's little speech.

"Well, looking at Edward, let's review the list shall we? Pretty eyes? Check. Really good hair? Lucky for Bella and Edward, Alice saved the day on that one, and I can say, _check_."

Alice clapped and said, "Yea, me!" causing Edward and me to laugh out loud recalling that ridiculous bet. We looked over to smirk at Emmett. He rolled his eyes and waved us off.

Coley continued, "Now, I'm not sure that he _can do just about anything_, because only time will tell, but Alice and I can attest to his unconditional love for her. And we require nothing less than that for our girl. Therefore, check. So, Edward, three out of four, man. Congratulations! You're seventy-five percent of the way to becoming the perfect husband." Everyone clapped and Edward bowed his head in thanks.

"But Alice and I conferred," Coley added. "And since you have extraordinarily good hair, we're bumping you up to eighty, eight-five percent, which is a solid B." Everyone laughed. "Hey, we couldn't give him an A right away, he needs something to shoot for, no?"

"Thanks, Coley," Edward laughed.

"Okay, my turn now!" Alice squealed as she jumped back up. "I'll make this short and sweet like me," she grinned. She turned to look at us, "Bella, you've been my friend for a long, long time. And Edward, you've been my brother for a long, long time as well. And how long did it take you two to realize you were perfect for each other?" she prompted us.

"A long, long time," Edward and I said together, both of us chuckling.

"Right," Alice smiled. "And how long do we expect for you two to be together?" Alice held her arms out inviting the entire room to join in.

"A long, long time," everyone in the room said together, laughing.

"Wrong!" Alice yelled in a sing-songy voice correcting all of us. "_Forever_, please," she concluded. "I love you both. Congratulations!"

Alice and Coley stepped over to hug the two of us as we exchanged thank you's and love you's. My girlfriends were the best.

Soon, it was Emmett's turn to give his speech as best man. Edward and I were clapping and smiling when Emmett was introduced. Through clenched teeth and a smile Edward leaned over and asked me, "How much has he had to drink?"

I answered through clenched teeth and a smile as well, "I have no idea." I leaned to Alice, who was sitting to my right, and while keeping the smile plastered to my face I asked, "How much has he had to drink?"

Alice answered, "I have no idea," holding the same expression Edward and I did as she leaned towards Coley and asked the same thing. "How much has he had to drink?"

And through the same clenched teeth smile that we had, Coley answered, "Quite a bit, but I think he's okay. You know, he could be worse I mean."

This…would be interesting.

We had a good chuckle over the fact that we had put a pair of sunglasses at each place setting for our guests to wear when Emmett gave his speech, and being the attentive guests they were, they all donned the shades as Emmett stood up. There was laughing and snickering throughout the small ballroom.

"Ha ha. You guys are funny," Emmett chuckled. "How's the glare? Is it okay? I'm not blinding anyone am I?" he asked moving his head at various angles," garnering more laughs from our family and friends. "Alright, alright. So, I'm Emmett. The big brother and the best man, if you didn't know. And if you didn't know, then you clearly weren't listening and/or you don't belong here."

Edward and I snickered but were both shaking our heads infinitesimally.

I heard Alice say, "Oh, Emmett," ever so softly and Coley was giggling, "He's a trip."

"Anyway, I'm supposed to be here to talk about Edward." Emmett slapped his brother on the back. "How's it going, man?" he asked Edward.

"Good," Edward answered.

"_Good? _Just_ good? You just got married, man. How are you?"_

Edward chuckled, "Very good."

"Alright! We got a _very good _out of Eddie! Good man!" Emmett slapped Edward on the back again. "So, I'll start by saying that he's been an honorable and loyal son to Carlisle and Esme," Emmett waved to his parents. They waved back with smiles on their faces. "As a brother he's been…" Emmett twisted his wrist and made an uncertain face as he searched for the right word, "…okay. Wouldn't you say, Alice?"

Emmett leaned forward and looked over to Alice, down the table from where he was. She was smiling. She shrugged and nodded. "Yeah, Edward's been okay I guess."

"Right. Just okay. And annoyingly, as a student, he's been…above average." Everyone, including Edward, laughed at the _above average_ comment. Edward was one of the smartest people I knew.

"So figuring he's been a good son, an okay brother, and a slightly above average student and then averaging it all out, it would be fair to say that Edward's a decent guy, going through life, doing…okay. But then along came Bella." Emmett paused to look over at me and wink. I blushed from all the attention I was now getting as I felt everyone's eyes on me.

Edward leaned over and kissed my warm, red cheek, chuckling at the color in my face. "And now, look at him. Edward's doing better than just okay. He's happy, like, all the time. He's way more fun to be around now. He doesn't get all bent out of shape when I call him Eddie. Well, maybe he'll chuck the occasional oyster cracker at my head, but that's all in good fun right? My point is this: we've all seen remarkable changes in my little brother these past months. Like I said, he was okay, tolerable even, before Bella. But because of Bella and the connection and love I see between them, Edward's gone from okay to pretty damn awesome. Oh, sorry, Eli. Don't say _damn_. _Damn_! I said it again. Eli, don't swear." We all laughed at Emmett again while Eli smiled and shook his head at his new big brother.

"Okay, one more thing. A wise man, let's call him Mr. Dove, once said, _Dare to love completely_." Edward, Alice and I all nudged each other knowing exactly who _Mr. Dove _was. Emmett had been dipping into the chocolates again. "I'm happy to see that these two have done just that. Now, I'm not going to say that they complete each other because they were both whole before they realized they loved each other. I'm going to say, instead, that Edward and Bella's love for each other made two great people even greater."

Emmett was beaming at Edward and me at this point, "I couldn't be happier for the two of you today. Bella, you were already my little sister before you married this guy, but consider this your official welcome into the family. We all love you. Cheers, guys!" Emmett concluded as he raised his champagne flute.

"Cheers!" everyone in the room said in unison, raising their glasses as well. We heard the clinking of glasses and a couple sniffles. One of the sniffles, shockingly, came from me. Okay, maybe not shockingly as I was very emotional that night.

I actually had tears in my eyes from Emmett's speech. Edward turned to look at me. He, too was beaming when he whispered, "I love you," and gave me a soft kiss. I breathed in his scent and whispered the same sentiment back to Edward, my husband.

The orchestra played while our friends and family danced their hearts out. I think we picked a good list of songs because everyone looked so content and in love as they danced with their partners. We were literally surrounded by love.

And as we danced to our song, Edward held me close. I looked up at Edward and smiled. He bent his head down to kiss me, the lingering lips kiss. "Best day ever?" I asked him.

Edward looked thoughtful a moment. "Everyday is the best day ever as long as we're together." I smiled in response as we continued to dance.

"Would you really do it all over again, Bella? All the heartache? My idiocy?"

I was thoughtful this time before I answered, "I can let go of all that now, Edward. Having what we have now, it was part of the path we had to take to get here."

He nodded, agreeing with me. "But there's one important thing that I can't let go of, Bella."

I furrowed my brow in curiosity as I looked at Edward urging him to tell me.

He gave me another kiss before he answered, "You, of course," as he squeezed me a little tighter to him. "Welcome to _Forever_, love."

The End

**A/N Once again, thanks for reading. I hope you liked the story and ending. This was really fun for me. We should do this again. (ha, it's like we were on a date) Be on the lookout for the bonus. Oh, Bella's dress as well as Coley and Alice's dress are on my profile page. You'll have to copy and past the address. Sorry about that. In the meantime, please review! I want to know your thoughts on the ending and/or the story in general.**


	28. Epilogue: Beginnings

**A/N I still don't own these characters. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**So, I heard a collective "Awwww" a couple days ago when I posted the last chapter. I think it was you guys. I hope everyone enjoyed the wedding. Phantom, sorry the country club security had to manhandle you like that, but what do you expect when you attempt to gate crash a Cullen wedding?**

**One of my favorite stories, Private Tutor, was updated, and though I really liked the chapter and can barely wait for the next one, I had to reread the Mr. and Mrs. Cullen chapter to cheer myself up. So, if you guys ever need cheering up, go back and reread one of the CLG chapters. Fantasy is a good one, I think. I also like Emmett the Great? a lot.**

**Agismsxx, thanks for being such a loyal reader and consistent reviewer. Your last review made me laugh. **_**Appendices?**_** Ha!**

**Okay, here it is: your bonus/epilogue. As always, REAR.**

**Can't Let Go**

**Epilogue**

**BPoV**

Edward and I came back to Seattle after three weeks in the Dominican Republic. We loved the week we spent there on Edward's spring break so much that we had to go back for a longer stay. Edward wanted to spend a month there, but four weeks seemed too long to be away from Charlie so we compromised and stayed the last three weeks in July.

The first honeymoon was absolutely wonderful. And the second, _real honeymoon_, as Edward referred to it was even better. I never thought I'd be the type of person to sit back and do nothing, but I had to admit, it got pretty easy.

We stayed at Tortuga bay in Punta Cana, which was situated in a gated community and was very luxurious and very perfect. I forced Edward to promise not to tell me how expensive it was upon penalty of death. I did not want to know because I was sure that knowing the price tag of the honeymoon would make my stomach turn.

The spring break week that we spent there was relatively uneventful. We spent the time as any newly married couple would have. We barely left the room. And since we missed so much sightseeing and culture the first time around, we vowed to return for the extended honeymoon.

The extended stay was even more magical than the first trip, we almost didn't want to come back to Seattle, but we had to. We wanted to get back in time for the arrival of our new nephew.

Rosalie had found out she was having a boy a few weeks after Edward and I got married. It was on then. Emmett was beside himself with anticipation for a mini-him. We had a few months to prepare ourselves for a mini-Emmett as well.

As soon as they found out the baby's sex, Emmett ran out and got a skateboard, tricycle, a baseball bat and mitt, and a football. We tried telling him that he had plenty of time for that, but he'd have none of it. "My boy's going to be an all-around athlete."

Rosalie was more practical. She picked out colors for the baby's room, as well as furniture and linens. We told her she couldn't get everything yet because we still wanted to throw her a baby shower, which we did in late June. Between Alice, Coley, Esme, Rosalie's mom, Hal, and myself, Rosalie made out like a bandit. Well, Baby Boy Cullen made out like a bandit.

Emmett and Rosalie had from April until August to agree on a name for their son. They needed that time, and possibly more, but as August approached, they had to make a decision. Emmett was vetoing all of Rosalie's choices without offering any alternatives himself. Every name that Rosalie came up with, Emmett could link it to some idiot high school student he had, and, thus, didn't want to be reminded of said student every time he looked at, talked to, referred to, or thought about his son.

"Tyler?" Rosalie had asked.

"No way. There's a Tyler in my fifth period American History class. He's a complete tool," Emmett said.

"Caleb?"

"Third period World History. Pansy."

"Kellan?"

"No way our child is going to be named after anyone on your laminated list, Babe."

"Jackson?"

"Seventh period Social Studies. FLK."

FLK was apparently a technical term teachers used for students whom they couldn't figure out the root cause of their weirdness. It stood for _funny looking kid_.

And so on and on all summer the game continued. Rose would offer up a potential name, and Emmett would shoot it down.

Luckily, or perhaps _unluckily _for Rosalie, she was already a week past her due date so that bought them a little more time, but she was miserable. It was hot; she was huge. Well, as huge as Rosalie could get. She was all belly. From behind, you couldn't even tell she was pregnant. Alice and I had been out shopping with Rose once when these college guys hit on her. Well, they only saw her from behind as Rosalie was facing the cosmetic counter at the time. I believed one of them said, "Hey, baby, you got the time?" while the other one smacked his lips and said "Mmmm mmm mmm!"

Men could be such pigs.

Their shocked expressions were priceless, though, when she turned to face them and they realized they just hit on a very pregnant woman.

"I think it's time for you two to get a life," was Rosalie's snide comment before turning back around to choose a shade of lipstick while the makeup woman, Alice and I snickered over their faux pas. But really, in the guys' defense, Rosalie did look good from behind.

They were lucky Emmett wasn't around to witness their behavior. He would have cleaned the floor of the department store with those guys. In fact, they were lucky Rosalie was in a good mood since she was shopping for makeup. I firmly believed that Rosalie could do just as much damage to them as Emmett could have had she been so inclined.

When not vetoing Rosalie's suggestions for baby names, Emmett was working at his Daily Grind.

The Starbucks around the corner from the HQ closed. It was the one I'd stop in when I went into the Times. It was at a prime location and Emmett wouldn't have needed to do a whole lot since the main components of a coffee shop were already there. Emmett scooped up the space as soon as it became available at the beginning of May. He opened his shop by the middle of June. He even had a few students from his school working there along with a few university students who also needed part-time jobs. Edward and I volunteered there when we could.

We helped to get it ready to open as well, which was why we took our extended honeymoon in July rather than June. We were making drinks and baking cookies and muffins, cleaning, even taking orders. We were doing it for fun, helping Emmett out and occupying our own time, me between columns and Edward being off from med school until September. Sure we were newlyweds and could have relished in being together at home all summer, but how much is there to do at the HQ besides the obvious newlywed activity? We still had our evenings to spend together for _more_, but we were doing something productive during the day. We got to spend the time together, plus, we were able to give Emmett time to be with Rosalie. Hal also joined in on the Daily Grind. He could make lattes really well too though I wasn't really surprised about that. We all worked there to help Emmett out, as family, but Emmett insisted on paying us.

He was grateful to the good press he got from Liz at the paper. She stopped in and had coffee and cookies for an assignment. She gave Emmett's an excellent review. We were confident his business would de well anyway since it catered to working people and college students, but with Liz's bump from the paper, the Daily Grind was a huge hit.

The genius of the shop wasn't that we offered a variety of different and exotic pastries because we didn't. Emmett didn't want to mess around with a long menu. Sure we had a vast array of drink items, but as far as baked goods, we would have sugar and chocolate chip cookies on hand but only one type of muffin available on any given day. If we didn't have what you liked, then move along. Try again tomorrow.

Tuesday, for instance, was blueberry muffin day. The muffin of the day was always posted on a chalkboard the customers could read as they walked in. And if someone were to ask what other kinds of muffins we were offering, Emmett would answer, "We got blueberry or blueberry. Which do you want?"

Emmett was indeed the muffin nazi. But he showed his softer side by posting a _Mr. Dove says… _on a dry erase message board with a saying each day regarding love and life. He also had a mailbox for Letters to LaLo boasting that he knew LaLo personally and would make sure she got the letters.

Emmett even had a cereal bar set up. Who would have thought selling single servings of cereal would go over so well? Edward and I certainly had our reservations about the cereals, but to our astonishment, people loved it! I guess it saved them the trouble of buying entire boxes of a variety of cereals. It was quite brilliant really. At Emmett's they could have the sporadic bowl of Lucky Charms without committing to an entire box. And the variety of cereals we offered was sure to satisfy any craving. Emmett's had it all from healthy (shredded wheat and bran flakes) to not healthy but very tasty (Oreo O's). Edward's and my vice was Cap'n Crunch. Edward preferred the Crunch Berries, but not me. I was a purist.

There were comfy chairs and couches for patrons to hang out in, and even some patio tables for when the weather was nice, but the bulk of the business occurred in the morning before work and at the end of lunch hour when people would pop in for an afternoon sugar fix to go. The cereal bar was a hit throughout the day. We called it _Anytime Cereal_ since eating cereal wasn't restricted to just the morning. A surprising number of patrons liked to have it for lunch as well.

Customers could be in and be out in a matter of minutes since Emmett had everyone trained really well. Emmett's shop was touted for being not only simple and convenient but extremely efficient as well.

And a huge point for good publicity that Liz reported on was the fact that we would deliver the cookies and muffins that we didn't sell during the day to the homeless shelter each night so they wouldn't go to waste.

He remembered Eli talking about having to stay at the homeless shelter for a little while and that really got to Emmett. It was just a little something he could do to help the cause, and the shelter and the people there really appreciated it. Sometimes we'd stay and chat with some of them after we made a delivery.

That's where Edward and I were the night before Rosalie's scheduled induction. We both got a frantic text from Emmett saying "_It's go time!" _Frantic, yes, but he somehow had the presence of mind to mass text all of us. Edward and I hypothesized that perhaps he had it in his draft box and kept it on hand for if and when he needed to send it out.

In any case, Edward and I headed out to the hospital at 9pm and met Alice and Jasper there while the Hales and the Cullens were on their way.

Emmett came out of the delivery room once a nurse informed him and Rosalie that we were there.

"Her water broke while we were home, but nothing's happening now. The doctor wants give her the medication to induce her but wants to wait another half hour to see if the contractions come on their own."

They only allowed two people in the room with her at a time so while Emmett stayed out in the hall with the guys, Alice and I went in to see how Rosalie was doing.

"Yeah, so this kind of sucks," Rosalie said, clearly annoyed. "I hope they give me the pitocin soon. I'm not dilating on my own."

"You know the contractions will come pretty hard once they give you the meds right?" I asked.

"Yeah, I know. I just want to get this over with already!"

The doctor stopped back in after the half hour was up and hooked Rosalie up to the IV to administer the pitocin. We were unprepared for what came next.

The contractions came, as expected. They came hard and fast. Alice and I were still with Rosalie when the labor really got underway but let Emmett and Rosalie's mom take our places in the delivery room fairly quickly. We were traumatized from the hour or so we were in there with Rosalie.

Alice and I walked out and sat quietly next to Edward and Jasper.

"Are you okay, Bella?" Edward asked. "You look kind of green. Alice too."

I swallowed hard. "Rosalie said she felt like her uterus was about to explode," I informed the guys, including Rosalie's dad and Carlisle. They all grimaced. Esme just gave a sympathetic _aww._

Edward and I hadn't talked much about children yet, just that one day we'd like to start a family, but I didn't like this uterus explosion business. I believed Alice felt the same way.

Soon, the anesthesiologist came by and gave Rosalie an epidural. Emmett came out shortly afterward to tell us that the contractions were still coming but Rosalie didn't feel a thing. She didn't even care about the contractions anymore. When Emmett told her when they were about to come as he watched their progression on the monitor, she just shrugged and said "Whatever."

By 3am Rosalie was dilated to ten centimeters and ready to push. She was pushing for quite a while without the baby moving much. Unfortunately, the baby's heart rate was dropping and they were about to wheel her into the operating room to do a C-section, but the doctor wanted to try one more big push along with using the vacuum at the same time.

That worked, finally. No surgery needed, and Baby Boy Cullen was born at 5:17 am on August 7th. Once the nurses got Rosalie and the baby to the mother-baby room we were able to visit.

Luckily, the room was big enough to fit everyone. Rosalie looked excellent, though a little tired, but who could blame her? I was no medical expert but even I knew she had been through quite a physical ordeal. But she looked very happy. Emmett was on top of the world, he was so excited. It was a quite a sight. They looked like the perfect little family.

We all took turns holding him briefly until it was time for Rose to try and breastfeed. We said goodbye and promised to return by mid-morning to give Rosalie some rest. When we left, she and Emmett still hadn't decided on a name yet.

Edward and I went straight to the Daily Grind to find Hal was already there and holding down the fort quite nicely. He told us he'd open the coffee shop when we called him the night before about Rosalie and the baby. While Edward and I helped to man the shop, we updated Hal and regular customers on Emmett and Rosalie and the baby.

A couple other workers came in around eight so Edward and I were able to go home to rest a bit.

Once home, we took Milton out to potty and then returned to the apartment to collapse. We were tired, but also too keyed up to get any actual shuteye. So we were just lying in bed.

I was nestled up next to Edward, my head in the crook of his neck, completely zoned out, as close to sleep as I could get. His arms were wrapped around me. We stayed that way for a couple hours until we got a text from Alice saying that she and Jasper were headed back over to the hospital. They'd bring lunch and meet us there.

Edward and I quickly showered and got ready. We stopped by the coffee shop to get some caffeine and to let Hal know what we were doing and that we'd be back to relieve him around one. He sent Rosalie and Emmett his love.

In the hospital Edward asked me if Rosalie's experience had scared me off from having a baby.

I had to think about it a moment. "A little, but women have been doing this forever so what's a little pain compared to bringing another life into the world right?"

Edward nodded. "Women are amazing."

I smiled, "Yes, we are aren't we?"

Edward chuckled and pulled me to him as we were waiting for the elevator to get to Rosalie's floor.

"So what do you think about us, love?" Edward murmured into the top of my head. I tilted my face up to look at him.

I furrowed my brow. "You mean a baby?"

"Mmmhmm," he nodded.

"What kind of timeline were you thinking of, Edward?"

"I don't know," he shrugged. "Within the next couple of years?" Edward looked worried as he awaited my reaction.

I kept looking at Edward pensively. I hadn't thought about trying to get pregnant so soon. I wasn't against the idea. I just hadn't entertained the idea. At all.

"Bella?" Edward's tone urged me for some sort of response. I knew my silence was painful for him.

I opened my mouth the same time the elevator door opened, and we were suddenly bombarded by Alice and Jasper, but mostly Alice. She was bouncing with excitement to see her nephew, but unfortunately for us, he and Rosalie were asleep and we didn't want to disturb them.

There was a little break room for family members to use down the hall from Rosalie's room, and Alice and Jasper had set up lunch there. Rosalie's parents as well as Carlisle and Esme were already in there.

"We'll be there in a minute, Alice," I told her. I could tell my not responding right away upset Edward, though he'd never admit it, so I took his hand and headed off to a quiet corner to talk.

We found another little waiting room that was empty so we went in there and sat down. We sat in separate chairs but we faced each other and our knees were touching. I still had hold of both of Edward's hands.

I gave him a weak smile as I attempted to make eye contact with him. Edward returned my smile with a weak one of his own, but his eyes wouldn't meet mine fully.

"Edward?"

Edward shook his head, "I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't mean to spring it on you like that. I…I guess the excitement of a new baby got to me. I understand if you don't want to right now," he drifted off quietly.

"Edward?" I said again. "Look at me please?" I urged. His green eyes finally met mine. "I honestly hadn't thought about it for us yet."

"I see," he said quietly again looking down.

I cupped his chin and brought his gaze back up to mine again. "That's not to say that it's not what I want."

"Really?" Edward asked finally gracing me with his smile.

"Yeah," I answered with a sigh. "Even though the physical act of giving birth scares the hell out of me right now," I admitted.

"I don't want you to agree just because it's what I want, Bella," Edward said.

"Well, that wasn't the only factor going into this decision, Edward," I started to explain. "I mean, we had already talked about starting a family some day." He nodded. "And babies are expensive, but I know we're in an all right financial position to have one." _All right_ was an understatement, but Edward nodded again anyway.

"And I've read recently that if a woman wanted to get pregnant within the next few years, she should start trying as soon as possible because you never know how long it'll take," I continued.

Edward leaned towards me and kissed me softly. "I love you."

I chuckled. "Okay, then remember that when I'm all crabby, alright?"

"What are you talking about, Bella?"

"Well, just to warn you, Edward. I've been on the pill for so long now I don't know what I'll be like when I'm off of them. Renee put me on them a year after I got my period because my cramps were so bad. I'd also get really terrible headaches during that time of the month so if I'm going off of the pill, I just want you to know what you're in for, and it might not be pretty." I smiled at him sheepishly. "For better or for worse, remember?"

Edward pulled me into his lap, staring me in the eyes. "Bring it, baby," he stated confidently before crashing his lips to mine. It started out as the lingering lips 3.0 but soon grew more intense when I tangled my fingers in his hair causing Edward to hold me tighter. I felt his hand find its way under my top at the small of my back.

I giggled as we finally broke the kiss and sat back up. "Edward, I said we'd start trying, but probably we shouldn't start right this minute."

"Right. Sorry, Bella, but it's so easy to get carried away with you," he chuckled giving me one more peck on the lips. "We should probably go see our family now anyway."

Once we made it to the other break room where our family was, we had some lunch with them. Rosalie and the baby had woken up but she was feeding him so we gave her some more privacy. Emmett came and got us when Rosalie was done.

Rosalie looked better rested and she was even able to sit up and visit with us. We were playing pass the baby again.

Esme was holding him when Edward asked, "So have you guys decided on a name yet?"

Emmett and Rosalie shook their heads and sighed.

I giggled. "Well, doesn't little Emmett need a name soon?"

Rosalie and Emmett both stared at me in surprise. "Oh, come on, guys, don't tell me you hadn't even thought about naming him Emmett before," I said in disbelief. "Isn't that like the go-to name? Junior?"

"Emmett was too busy vetoing my ideas and I honestly hadn't thought of a junior," Rosalie admitted. "I was looking at the hip and trendy names I guess." She smiled as she let the name sink in. "I like it though."

"Little Emmett," Emmett whispered with a half smile, nodding slowly. "Sweet!"

"Emmett Junior," Esme smiled as she handed her grandson off to me.

I looked down at the little bundle in my arms. He was so sweet in his little blue knitted hat with a few strands of dark brown hair sticking out from underneath, all swaddled in the hospital's generic blue and white striped baby blanket. His blue eyes were wide open and he looked very alert, while his little pink lips were pursed. "Hi, Em-J," I whispered, unwittingly coining his new nickname that we'd use for years to come. "Welcome to the world, little man."

**A/N And all together now, "Awww!" So, Yay for Em-J! Yay for Bella and Edward trying to start a family. And, last but not least, yay for a sequel: The Daily Grind, coming your way soon! Oh, I forgot one more: and yay for reviews????? If you've read this far and haven't reviewed even once, come on, throw me a bone here. Even if it's just to tell me a what a review whore I am. I put my blood, sweat and tears into this opus. Well, I typed a lot anyway. Holla atcha girl please. **


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